Dating someone 22 years older?

I think it's up to you, it's legal, if you both want to then go for it. Dating someone doesn't have to mean lifetime commitment, you could just go on a few dates together, see how you get on / what you have in common and go from there.

I think the biggest issues with age gaps come with wanting different things in life, the older person may want to settle down quickly with the younger person still wanting to go out and have fun. Or because they're from a whole different generation they may have different values, possibly have very different interests and a different perspective on things.

I wouldn't mind if I had a daughter at that age and she wanted to date an older man, as long as they were happy together and he treats her well that's all that matters to me. As I said, you don't have to rush right in to a full blown relationship, it's not like you're stuck with the guy if it doesn't work out.

I think it depends where you both are in life. For example, does he have kids if so would he eventually want more. If not and you want kids, move on. Do you have things in common, if so great, if not move on. Think about the future, do you want to be 40 married to someone who is 62, if not move on. You get the idea.

What's the big fascination with long term? As long as it is healthy and kind, go for it. Although, I think 20 is too young to be in any serious relationship at all.

I'm 41 and honestly can't imagine having anything in common with a 20 year old. Go for it, but my guess is that you're not exactly getting the socially adept 42 year old in the herd.

THIS. I'm 42 and 20 year olds are kids to me, in a completely different stage of life. Young enough to be my child. Someone who sees them as dating material is probably not someone you want to be dating, and it might be harder for you to see because you aren't his age.

It's like a 20 year old who wants to date a 12 year old. Setting aside the legal aspect for a moment, think of how you would feel about doing that. If you are a typical 20 year old, you probably think this person 8 years younger is an immature kid and it would be like dating your little brother or something. Nothing in common, either. Any guy your age your age who wanted to date 12 year old kids instead of young women his own age would be seen as a creeper, right? Maybe just after easy sex or a docile girlfriend? Or socially maladjusted? The 12 year old is going to think this 20 year old is mature, but a peer could see that he is not.

SO....be careful, go slow, keep your eyes open.

1) I think if you're online questioning right/wrong, it's probably not a good idea.

2) I don't know why a 42 year old would want to date a 20 year old. 25+...maybe...but not 20.

3) If it was one of my kids, they would have to worry about their crazy Marine father in a ghillie suit in the bushes, so it's probably not a good idea...

I'm 41 and would not date a 20 year old. 25 is my limit on the lower age bracket and that's pushing it.

My rule of thumb for how young to go is 1/2 your age plus 7. So for me that's 27.5 which I think is pretty reasonable, but I'd go to 25 if she was mature enough.

I'm not 42 but I'd definitely bang at 20 yr old as long as she was hot

bang is not the same as date though. Bang for sure, date no way.

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I'm 35 and can't even imagine what I would want with a 20 year old. What could you have in common?

In my experience, a 42 year old that wants to date a 20 year old probably has control issues that someone their own age isn't going to put up with. I would ask myself if we were married or living together what resources would I bring to the relationship. If he has all the money, experience, the house, then all you're bringing is yourself and no areas of power.

When one person holds all the chips, relationships tend to suck.

I know I'm an adult and I shouldn't care what the public thinks. I was honestly just asking since I don't have parents to ask and I didn't know who else to ask.

I guess the question should have been more like 'if you had a 20 year old daughter would you approve of her dating a 42yo'

No I would not approve.

It works for some couples. When I was 20 I married a 40yr old man and we did last ten years but should have ended sooner. We just weren't in sync entering different stages of life at different times. We have been seperated now about five or six years ago ish and I seen for the first time recently since we seperated and damn he looks old! Lol im now 35 and he's 55 and has himself a new 20 something on his arm. Its probably weird when you guys hang out and talk about growing up he would find your stories so out of touch with his...but to each his own...if you really like him go for it.

The more important question is what do YOU think?

I have to agree

As someone mentioned above, it really depends who you are and where you are in life. The trouble with being 20, is that you have a lot of experiences in life ahead of you that he will have already gone through. The way you view the world, your interests, your passions, everything about you still has a lot of change coming in the next decade. In a year, three, or five, you might find yourself a completely different person. I can personally vouch for that because I am only 27 myself and have room to grow. But, realistically, this is true in any relationship. Just be aware of this and give the relationship a chance to prove itself. My parents have a 15 year age difference and have been together for 30 years. I have an 18 year age difference with my boyfriend and we have been together for 7 years. We love each other, we want the same things out of life, and we want to tackle those obstacles together. That's what makes it work. Good luck.

Man people around here are ageist.

Not a matter of ageism.

I mean...can you really compare emotional and mental maturity of a 20 year old-someone who can't even legally drink-to someone who is 42 years old?

As someone mentioned above there are 20 odd years of life experience there...that are missing.
Dating? I guess dating yeah....but...marriage? I don't know. Again-I don't know either of you.

Psychologically you are totally different. You are at different area's in your life. Are you just dating, fooling around, just sex or is it something you want for long term? If it is you have to ask yourself, do you really want to have the person you are with grown old when you are in your prime or grow old together. I personally think age is a huge thing. So little in common. You are talking about 20 and 42. I am 42 right now and the thought of being with a 20 year old is not even the least bit appealing intellectually or experiancially. Nothing against a 20 year old, I just know I am a profoundly different person at 42 than I was at 20. Also typically the 42 year old has much more say over the relationship and the upper hand. But this may not be typical, maybe it would be even, just not common for that. I find if i could be someone's parent, it's best not to partake in the dating experience.

But ultimately I guess it depends on you, but if you are asking here I suspect you have reservations about the whole thing. Good luck, although it is not for me, I guess it can work, but I urge you to think about the consequences of age first...Just a thought.

Don't think it'll work out for most, but the majority of relationships don't work out and it typically has little to do with age.
I understand the appeal on your part, but for the older party it seems to be entirely physically based.
And no, if I had a daughter I wouldn't want her dating someone old enough to be her dad.
But in the end only your opinion matters. If you can handle possibly being with someone who's with you for an ego boost (Oo wow a 20 year old wants me!) and you don't care about public opinion, then go for it.
Your life. The risk or reward will be yours alone.