which parent is the jerk in this instance

124

Replies

  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member


    mom b And how can I not be hurt when I had to hold my kid while he cried himself to sleep asking my why you guys don't like him

    Does anyone else find this part odd and far fetched…?

    Seems like somebody could have done a better job explaining this to her son. Sounds like he has the over-reacting bug as well.

    That's what happens when kids grow up with overly sensitive parents.

    This.
    Someday the crying child will have REAL problems that Mommy & Daddy can't bully the world into accommodating.
  • morethenjustmum
    morethenjustmum Posts: 170 Member
    I am slightly ashamed to admit that I am mom B

    My son cries a lot , its a thing he is young, he loves those kids and his heart broke. what can I say.

    I didn't tell him the party was cancelled because of him I told him
    'they are a bit worried about the lice not being completely gone and think it would be a better idea if we had a visit later this summer. What would you like to do instead". I planned something fun to do at home.

    My friend is great but her husband has a superiority complex the size of my *kitten*. He is often condescending to people he finds are beneath him ( read me ) and often questions my parenting,among other things this may be why I am so sensitive. I treated my kids I vacuumed ,I change the sheets every second day and I check them twice a day to be sure they haven't got anything. They picked it up from camp. It happens I know its annoying and lice sucks but I am hyper vigilante about it.

    I guess when I wrote that I had treated them and checked them and everything it would be okay , that they knew me well enough to know how careful I am with this kind of thing. T hen she hands the phone to him.

    In all honesty I feel like a complete *kitten* for responding the way I did , especially about my kid I should have never written that. But hubby is a hot head and kept telling me they we a-holes. Thats why I asked all of you. Also the party wasn't cancelled we were just asked not to come. I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

    So there we have it
    I am an over sensitive jack *kitten* with a big mouth prone to passive aggressive behavior and need to call my friend and say sorry.

    Oh and I mentioned it in the first place cause if their kids had had lice I would want to know, I am all about full disclosure when it come to contagious stuff.

    any other questions ?

    once again thank you
  • morethenjustmum
    morethenjustmum Posts: 170 Member
    Seems more like all parties are behaving like a big C.

    hahaha I love this I feel like I unleashed a can of stupid
    hangs head
  • levitateme
    levitateme Posts: 999 Member
    The lesson you should take away is NEVER TALK ABOUT LICE>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> EVER. Once someone knows you have had lice... your children will always be the lice children.

    You should probably go to the pharmacy a couple of towns over to buy the medicated shampoo too.

    Yep. I don't know who said that they are inevitable, I never had them. One of my good friends in 4th or 5th grade did (her 4 brothers had them as well) and I was not allowed to play at their house ever again or have her sleep over.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    The lesson you should take away is NEVER TALK ABOUT LICE>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> EVER. Once someone knows you have had lice... your children will always be the lice children.

    You should probably go to the pharmacy a couple of towns over to buy the medicated shampoo too.

    Yep. I don't know who said that they are inevitable, I never had them. One of my good friends in 4th or 5th grade did (her 4 brothers had them as well) and I was not allowed to play at their house ever again or have her sleep over.
    That's extreme and awful.

    I had them once. I never had them again. And no one caught them from me. I hope you treat people better than your parents did.
  • osothefinn
    osothefinn Posts: 163 Member

    All kids will end up with lice at one point.

    Nope.
  • ANTlSOClAL
    ANTlSOClAL Posts: 47
    Mom A sounds like a crazy paranoid person. Mom B sounds like she likes to start drama rather than talk to someone rationally about situations.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    ... I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

    So there we have it...

    Right on! I like how you are owning your drama here. Lesson learned, right? You are taking this very graciously, OP! :drinker: :flowerforyou: :smooched:
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
    This.
    Someday the crying child will have REAL problems that Mommy & Daddy can't bully the world into accommodating.

    Please, tell us some more about how much better a parent you are than OP.
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member

    My friend is great but her husband has a superiority complex the size of my *kitten*. He is often condescending to people he finds are beneath him

    Sounds like a lot of the people here
  • mthr2
    mthr2 Posts: 158 Member

    I guess when I wrote that I had treated them and checked them and everything it would be okay , that they knew me well enough to know how careful I am with this kind of thing. T hen she hands the phone to him.

    In all honesty I feel like a complete *kitten* for responding the way I did , especially about my kid I should have never written that. But hubby is a hot head and kept telling me they we a-holes. Thats why I asked all of you. Also the party wasn't cancelled we were just asked not to come. I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

    So there we have it
    I am an over sensitive jack *kitten* with a big mouth prone to passive aggressive behavior and need to call my friend and say sorry.

    Seriously, it wasn't that bad. Her husband's involvement exacerbated the situation, IMO, because of how you feel about each other....or the perceptions thereof. You got your feelings hurt and let her know. There are much worse things between friends.

    Also, asking for opinions here is dangerous. They will be honest, but not gentle....and many times given with the intention of being more humorous than honest,even. I say quite a bit of a**hole stuff on here purely for my own entertainment. I'm probably not even in the minority.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    Is anyone else itchy now? Something about talking about the critters sets me off.....

    When my mom was in the hospital with chemo, I even had to be careful about what immunizations the kids were getting or they wouldn't be able to be around her for weeks.

    Sometimes it sucks, but there are some things that just have to be done. It is a good lesson for the kids here too. Sometimes you are excluded from things for reasons other than whether someone likes you or not.
  • morethenjustmum
    morethenjustmum Posts: 170 Member
    ... I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

    So there we have it...

    Right on! I like how you are owning your drama here. Lesson learned, right? You are taking this very graciously, OP! :drinker: :flowerforyou: :smooched:

    thank you I believe there is always room to learn from my mistakes and I make plenty
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    See! Now, this is drama. Love it. Please give me more people with petty arguments.
  • jdhcm2006
    jdhcm2006 Posts: 2,254 Member


    All kids will end up with lice at one point.

    Not true.
  • morethenjustmum
    morethenjustmum Posts: 170 Member

    I guess when I wrote that I had treated them and checked them and everything it would be okay , that they knew me well enough to know how careful I am with this kind of thing. T hen she hands the phone to him.

    In all honesty I feel like a complete *kitten* for responding the way I did , especially about my kid I should have never written that. But hubby is a hot head and kept telling me they we a-holes. Thats why I asked all of you. Also the party wasn't cancelled we were just asked not to come. I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

    So there we have it
    I am an over sensitive jack *kitten* with a big mouth prone to passive aggressive behavior and need to call my friend and say sorry.

    Seriously, it wasn't that bad. Her husband's involvement exacerbated the situation, IMO, because of how you feel about each other....or the perceptions thereof. You got your feelings hurt and let her know. There are much worse things between friends.

    Also, asking for opinions here is dangerous. They will be honest, but not gentle....and many times given with the intention of being more humorous than honest,even. I say quite a bit of a**hole stuff on here purely for my own entertainment. I'm probably not even in the minority.
    I knew what I was in for when I asked
    I think I needed to hear it
    also wish I could have applied that logic to the situation in question.
    sigh live and learn
    I have apologised I hope she excepts
  • mthr2
    mthr2 Posts: 158 Member
    I have apologised I hope she excepts

    She will. And she probably would have let you come over if it weren't for the pressure she was getting from him. So she probably feels bad too.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Seems to me that there are a bunch of underlying issues and it's not really so much about the lice incident at all, i.e. this family being condescending to you on a regular basis. If it was me, I'd stop socialising with that family. I'd not make any kind of big deal over it, just slowly back out of the situation, as in respond socially to them but not initiate any more contact, and start making friends with families that didn't treat mine like second class citizens. Doubly so if it's having a negative effect on the self esteem of any of my kids. I mean there's a big difference between a one-off incident/misunderstanding (which you deal with like adults and talk about and fix and then move on from) and a persistent problem where someone's treating you badly on a regular basis. No-one has to put up with that, and if your kids see you putting up with it, then it's giving them the message that it's okay to let people treat you badly.

    Regarding being sensitive - if you have this issue with only one person/family/social circle, then it's likely the problem is them, and you just leave them. If it's happening repeatedly with many people/families/social circles, then it's likely the problem is you and you'd need to reassess your beliefs about yourself and about what you expect from other people. The above paragraph assumes that this is the only family you have these issues with.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    This.
    Someday the crying child will have REAL problems that Mommy & Daddy can't bully the world into accommodating.

    Please, tell us some more about how much better a parent you are than OP.

    My sons are 22 and 26. Although I no longer need to "parent" them, as they have been self-reliant for years, I have plenty of experience being a parent.

    If you'd like more details, message me and I'll be happy to elaborate. I'm not sure the rest of the thread participants are nearly as interested as you seem to be.
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    Wow. What a case of overreactive helicoptering hipsters (all adults involved). Couldn't all involved print out some guidelines for the treatment and recurrence prevention of head lice and make an informed decision that doesn't place blame and stigma for a common childhood parasite? Why would Mom B bring up the lice issue if it had been treated and resolved? Why would Mom B shave her head in response to her children's head lice if she didn't have any? Why would Husband A insert himself into the conversation as the authority figure of the group? Why can't anyone have a conversation about matters like this instead of texting?

    I'm pretty sure this is why I don't have a social circle.
  • Lauren8239
    Lauren8239 Posts: 1,039 Member
    i dont know a single person who has had lice, i remember inspections at school when i was young and there was always an announcement that we were lice free. considering a few people said lice are inevitable, are they really all that common in other areas?


    My daughter got lice in high school. Total shock. Someone must of had it in one of her classes, but we never heard a word. She kept complaining of such an itchy head and when I had a good look.....omg....I just cringed! We still don't know where she got it. With her hair being down to her butt it took 4 treatments to be sure they were all dead and gone, and it's no fun picking out those dead things. I still shudder to think about it.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    I am slightly ashamed to admit that I am mom B

    My son cries a lot , its a thing he is young, he loves those kids and his heart broke. what can I say.

    I didn't tell him the party was cancelled because of him I told him
    'they are a bit worried about the lice not being completely gone and think it would be a better idea if we had a visit later this summer. What would you like to do instead". I planned something fun to do at home.

    My friend is great but her husband has a superiority complex the size of my *kitten*. He is often condescending to people he finds are beneath him ( read me ) and often questions my parenting,among other things this may be why I am so sensitive. I treated my kids I vacuumed ,I change the sheets every second day and I check them twice a day to be sure they haven't got anything. They picked it up from camp. It happens I know its annoying and lice sucks but I am hyper vigilante about it.

    I guess when I wrote that I had treated them and checked them and everything it would be okay , that they knew me well enough to know how careful I am with this kind of thing. T hen she hands the phone to him.

    In all honesty I feel like a complete *kitten* for responding the way I did , especially about my kid I should have never written that. But hubby is a hot head and kept telling me they we a-holes. Thats why I asked all of you. Also the party wasn't cancelled we were just asked not to come. I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

    So there we have it
    I am an over sensitive jack *kitten* with a big mouth prone to passive aggressive behavior and need to call my friend and say sorry.

    Oh and I mentioned it in the first place cause if their kids had had lice I would want to know, I am all about full disclosure when it come to contagious stuff.

    any other questions ?

    once again thank you

    ALL parents make mistakes.
    Good thing there's lot of time to re-adjust and learn from them.
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    mom B is one of those overly sensitive types who loves to play the martyr. she also seems to blow up any situation that doesnt go her way. if she keeps acting like that id cut her out of the group.
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  • morethenjustmum
    morethenjustmum Posts: 170 Member
    Seems to me that there are a bunch of underlying issues and it's not really so much about the lice incident at all, i.e. this family being condescending to you on a regular basis. If it was me, I'd stop socialising with that family. I'd not make any kind of big deal over it, just slowly back out of the situation, as in respond socially to them but not initiate any more contact, and start making friends with families that didn't treat mine like second class citizens. Doubly so if it's having a negative effect on the self esteem of any of my kids. I mean there's a big difference between a one-off incident/misunderstanding (which you deal with like adults and talk about and fix and then move on from) and a persistent problem where someone's treating you badly on a regular basis. No-one has to put up with that, and if your kids see you putting up with it, then it's giving them the message that it's okay to let people treat you badly.

    Regarding being sensitive - if you have this issue with only one person/family/social circle, then it's likely the problem is them, and you just leave them. If it's happening repeatedly with many people/families/social circles, then it's likely the problem is you and you'd need to reassess your beliefs about yourself and about what you expect from other people. The above paragraph assumes that this is the only family you have these issues with.

    I am going to really think about what you have written here, You are spot on , as you often are from what I see of your forum posts. Thank you for taking the time to write this.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member

    My friend is great but her husband has a superiority complex the size of my *kitten*. He is often condescending to people he finds are beneath him

    Sounds like a lot of the people here

    Weak flame bait attempt

    You I like. :drinker:
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  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
    Hey OP/Mom B (yay, I guessed it right!),

    Just wanted to say that you're pretty awesome for considering the general consensus and reacting accordingly - that's a tough thing to do especially when you get some pretty direct responses.

    Now, cue 5 more pages of people commenting that don't read the posts up until this point! :laugh:
  • runner475
    runner475 Posts: 1,236 Member
    OP you are a very sweet mom. Kudos to you girl.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    If you were sure that the lice situation was taken care of, then I don't understand why you even said anything about it. Of course other parents are going to freak out about lice.

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