Walking out on a fitness class/instructor???
Replies
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Wow I guess nobody here has ever been late! Wow nice attitude people real understanding. So every time you go some place you never hit a red light or have traffic problems. Nothing stops you guys from getting some place on time. Wow I thought everyone here was nice, but I guess I just found the group of jerks.
I've seen other threads on here where people attack a poster. I don't post because I don't want a tirade of rants.
The OP wasn't attacked. The very obvious flaws in her position were pointed out.
The OP was late. The OP rage quit the class. The OP failed to take responsibility for her actions. The OP then attacked people here. The OP rage quit MFP.
It is impossible to support the OP's actions without condoning a lack of common courtesy.0 -
First let me say that I am a novice at posting something so please understand that if I break some protocol. I think you did the right thing by walking out because you have to trust your gut. Our minds are able to detect things that we can't intellectualize or verbalize. Please trust yourself when it comes to this. If this was happening repeatedly in a variety of circumstances then you would have to question yourself but there is no indication of that. You take another class and don't feel that way. That you acknowledged you wee late tells me that you were trying to be fair and open.
As to suggestions that ignoring you was the instructor's attempt to punish or correct your behavior that could be true. I don't know. If that was the purpose I think it is a mistake. You are not going to teach someone to be on time by ignoring them. Acknowledging each person that comes into your class is a basic and critical connection. If there is a problem (more than one instance) with lateness or anything else you can use that rapport to have a private discussion explaining your concern. That is, you act like an adult and treat your paying customer like an adult.0 -
Did you not read valateenarab? I did apologize and i did ask her for tips to fix my posture. Obviously i breastfed after kids so breastfeeding would mean i screwed up my posture. This forum is full of ridiculously rude and angry people. And i was never late except today. She cancelled her class. But yeah perhaps i wanted others take on her. I spoke to a few ppl she knows and they agreed shes miserable. Perhaps her negative energy is what affected me to be annoyed and post this here.
I'm with you on this. People are getting a bit agro at you. It's obvious that the instructor is uptight. It sounds like she is annoyed as her class has halved. Being late isnt a hanging offence! Any class i have been too the instructor has not been like that.
If it's a group fitness class, you show up late, no big deal. Find a spot in the back and get moving. This class wasn't like that - it's apparently maybe a martial arts class - which requires things to be demonstrated before executed, and people pairing up with similar skill levels. Showing up late means you're not warmed up, you missed whatever the instructor had to say, you missed any demos, and the partner pairing may now need to be adjusted. Coming in late means you're disrupting *everyone there* who not only paid, but showed up on time. That isn't fair to the instructor nor to the other students.0 -
Wow I guess nobody here has ever been late! Wow nice attitude people real understanding. So every time you go some place you never hit a red light or have traffic problems. Nothing stops you guys from getting some place on time. Wow I thought everyone here was nice, but I guess I just found the group of jerks.
Nope I hate being late, I'd rather be an hour early0 -
I used to be an instructor for technical classes. Students who were late got little notice from me, quite deliberately, because it lets them know that being late is unacceptable.
Would it not be more appropriate to ask why they are late before being ignored? You don't know that person's situation.
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.0 -
If she's a provider of a service and she wants to get paid then yes. Nothing wrong with being polite. If she wont do it then am sure there will be other instructors who can handle clients effectively. The situation could have been handled better by both of them and this drama avoided. They now both lose.
Not really. Some clients take more time and effort that they're worth. I have no problem "firing" a client that's has a bad attitude or takes away the focus on the other clients.
Just because someone is paying you doesn't mean you have to kiss their *kitten*0 -
I used to be an instructor for technical classes. Students who were late got little notice from me, quite deliberately, because it lets them know that being late is unacceptable.
Would it not be more appropriate to ask why they are late before being ignored? You don't know that person's situation.
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
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I used to be an instructor for technical classes. Students who were late got little notice from me, quite deliberately, because it lets them know that being late is unacceptable.
Would it not be more appropriate to ask why they are late before being ignored? You don't know that person's situation.
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
The narcissists among us think their situation trumps those of everyone else.0 -
lol, some of you make it sound like OP was interrupting surgery. Being 15 minutes late to a fitness class isn't ideal, but isn't exactly a signal for the end of times either.
I would've at least tried to signal the teacher in a quiet moment before opting to leave though...and I wouldn't overblow the posture comment either.
I agree^ being late is rude but I wouldn't have walked out of the class. I would have done the class as best as I could considering I was the one late and learned to show up early or on time for the next class. If there is any issues with you and the instructor then thats when you should discuss it after class or at another time. Im sorry to say but I have had 3 kids and all breastfed and wouldn't use that as an excuse for my back hurting. it sounded like an excuse to me and I'm sure the instructor hears excuses from people all day then they complain when their not reaching their goals.0 -
Bad form. You are wrong...
15 minutes early is on time
On time us late
15 minutes late...don't bother0 -
If she's a provider of a service and she wants to get paid then yes. Nothing wrong with being polite. If she wont do it then am sure there will be other instructors who can handle clients effectively. The situation could have been handled better by both of them and this drama avoided. They now both lose.
Not really. Some clients take more time and effort that they're worth. I have no problem "firing" a client that's has a bad attitude or takes away the focus on the other clients.
Just because someone is paying you doesn't mean you have to kiss their *kitten*
QFT!!0 -
People who stick with the martial arts tend to be a certain kind of person.
I don't predict long-term adherence from the OP.
The instructor is supposed to be better than you. It's not arrogance. It's a fact.
Of course, now rather than being students trying develop our skills (which we lack) from someone who has spent a long time cultivating theirs to a high degree, we're all consumers buying a product. That's the problem. It's not an improvement, btw...
The instructor is better than them when it comes to a specific skill. They are more knowledgable in certain subject area. But they are not simply "better than you" in general. Any instructor who feels that they are needs to find a new line of work. I would never presume to be better than my clients.
If that skill-set includes discipline and the student can't show the requisite discipline, then they're not the equal of the instructor yet.
I recall each session starting with a bow from both student and teacher which implies mutual respect. I also recall being told the dojo code. My sensei made it clear what was expected - he didn't sulk.0 -
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
Haha such delightful nonsense!
They were in a boxing/thai boxing class not managing air traffic control. The class does not fall apart if the instructor has to say "warm up and join in for the next set of reps" to someone who was late.0 -
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
Haha such delightful nonsense!
They were in a boxing/thai boxing class not managing air traffic control. The class does not fall apart if the instructor has to say "warm up and join in for the next set of reps" to someone who was late.
Where do you work where being 15 minutes late is such acceptable behavior? Where do you train where you don't have to explain what "the next set of reps" even is? Where do you live where you get to decide what's acceptable for people to inconvenience other people and it's nothing.
She missed 30% of the class. But hey, you go ahead and run your class however you feel0 -
Bad form. You are wrong...
15 minutes early is on time
On time us late
15 minutes late...don't bother
QFT. I have 2 toddlers that I have to get all settled into childcare and I still arrive 10-15 min early because I respect the instructors and other participants... and because I like to get a good spot
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NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
Haha such delightful nonsense!
They were in a boxing/thai boxing class not managing air traffic control. The class does not fall apart if the instructor has to say "warm up and join in for the next set of reps" to someone who was late.
Thanks for using your first sentence to inform us the rest of your post is nonsense. You were correct about that.0 -
I think you guys missed the part where I said there were several others late before me during the first class and it did not bother her at all. She was polite to them. It seems like an inferiority complex some women have. 3 kids and breastfeeding does affect posture. She gave off rude vibes in the beginning. a friend who knows her also said she thinks shes superior to others.
It doesn't affect everyone the same way, I have years of extended breastfeeding under my belt (well, now under my boobs which is now closer to my belt than I'd like to admit). If you're boxing, you need to have tough skin. She does. You see that as rude but you don't see your own behaviour as rude. Maybe there are other things you aren't seeing.
If there's one time I'm never late, it's boxing, and I work with someone I like. lol0 -
I am with my brother here . I think everyone is being a tad dramatic. lateness is not good, but it happens. To the OP if you dont have a good vibe with the instructor go to another class0
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NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
Haha such delightful nonsense!
They were in a boxing/thai boxing class not managing air traffic control. The class does not fall apart if the instructor has to say "warm up and join in for the next set of reps" to someone who was late.
Where do you work where being 15 minutes late is such acceptable behavior? Where do you train where you don't have to explain what "the next set of reps" even is? Where do you live where you get to decide what's acceptable for people to inconvenience other people and it's nothing.
She missed 30% of the class. But hey, you go ahead and run your class however you feel
I can be 15 min late b/c I know I'll be 30 minutes late leaving at my job. BUT. That's my day to day job- and my boss knows I put my due diligence in. And I gave her fair warning I never show up to work on time- I'm either an hour early or 30 min late.
But I"M NEVER late to meetings- and I'm NEVER late to dance class.
Our studio has a list of rules and etiquette. and if you walk in 9 min late- you best be requesting permission to join the floor.
Dave is right- it's 30% of the class.
If you are 15 min late- you sit on the side and watch. Join the next class.
IMO: the only time it's remotely close to okay to be significantly late to a workshop/class is if you clear it with the instructor ahead of time- and even then- if you're missing half the class- why bother.
OP had a tantrum- teacher didn't handle the situation well- but OP feels entitled and had a tantrum- well technically two.0 -
Ok, this is where I can definitely I feel give my two cents I actually am a former martial arts instructor who just left my job just a few days ago in order to move to a new state. At my old school, we did NOT allow students into class 15 minutes late, no matter whether or not they were old or new students. This will help us to prevent not only injury but it also would prevent our school from liability. The reason why you were seeing students come in before you was probably because they came in before that bench mark time when they were doing the lighter warm ups and the risk of injury wasn't high (So probs at the ten min mark, or pretty close), and then when she saw you, it was close to the fifteen min mark when things were getting more serious. Or so I would assume. Boxing and Martial arts are extremely similar in the contact sports category and also in the liability sense, so us instructors have to be extremely careful. I do NOT blame her for her actions, but I do feel that people were coming off as kind of rude. As a newbie, I don't think it was fair for you to understand that you HAVE to come in early. This isn't a class that you can JUST jump in on, you have to be early if not right on time and you have to be ready for a good burn, if you're not feeling well or if you are late, stay home, ok? Don't let the rude instructor be the one to get you to stop going, nor the rude people on this site. This is kind of out of hand, as a few are now jumping in to say, I'm having a bit of hope seeing some others jump in with me too
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Where do you work where being 15 minutes late is such acceptable behavior? Where do you train where you don't have to explain what "the next set of reps" even is? Where do you live where you get to decide what's acceptable for people to inconvenience other people and it's nothing.
She missed 30% of the class. But hey, you go ahead and run your class however you feel
1) Ive been late to work - frankly, they get more than enough evening and weekend work from me and deadlines met. Its a non-issue.
2) It was a beginners class - you can have the new person join in the next time youre explaining something. Or you say "sorry youre too late to join this class". Saying nothing was immature on the teachers part
3) Oh please, some people are inconvenienced just by the fact other people live and breathe. If you cant get over someone turning up 15 minutes late to a gym, youre far too precious for me. lol.0 -
Ok, this is where I can definitely I feel give my two cents I actually am a former martial arts instructor who just left my job just a few days ago in order to move to a new state. At my old school, we did NOT allow students into class 15 minutes late, no matter whether or not they were old or new students. This will help us to prevent not only injury but it also would prevent our school from liability. The reason why you were seeing students come in before you was probably because they came in before that bench mark time when they were doing the lighter warm ups and the risk of injury wasn't high (So probs at the ten min mark, or pretty close), and then when she saw you, it was close to the fifteen min mark when things were getting more serious. Or so I would assume. Boxing and Martial arts are extremely similar in the contact sports category and also in the liability sense, so us instructors have to be extremely careful. I do NOT blame her for her actions, but I do feel that people were coming off as kind of rude. As a newbie, I don't think it was fair for you to understand that you HAVE to come in early. This isn't a class that you can JUST jump in on, you have to be early if not right on time and you have to be ready for a good burn, if you're not feeling well or if you are late, stay home, ok? Don't let the rude instructor be the one to get you to stop going, nor the rude people on this site. This is kind of out of hand, as a few are now jumping in to say, I'm having a bit of hope seeing some others jump in with me too
at my local gym reception wouldnt sell you a ticket after a certain time for classes as you miss the warm up. If members sneak in, the instructor will politely say too late. This is what really needs to happen.0 -
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
Haha such delightful nonsense!
They were in a boxing/thai boxing class not managing air traffic control. The class does not fall apart if the instructor has to say "warm up and join in for the next set of reps" to someone who was late.
Thanks for using your first sentence to inform us the rest of your post is nonsense. You were correct about that.
Shouldve probably kept that one to yourself....0 -
I think that people forget that MA instructors didn't get a certificate on the wall from a 2 day workshop.
They trained diligently for several decades to earn their title. Most MAs are steeped in Eastern tradition, which revolves around respect and honor. Respect has been demanded of them by their teachers, and they in turn demand the respect of their students. There's a reason you refer to them as 'Master' or 'Grandmaster'.
Most MAs have minimum time requirements between black belt grades. It varies, but you can expect to spend three years earning 1st Dan. Then you are required to train at least another two years before 2nd Dan, no matter how good you are. Then three years for 3rd Dan. Four more years for 4th Dan, etc...
So if you're being taught by a Master (varies by style, but lowest Master I've known is 4th Dan), you can work on about 10 to 12 years of experience at minimum. If you are privileged enough to be taught by an 8th Dan Grandmaster, you can expect that they have been training for nearly four decades at a minimum.
You bet your *kitten* they demand respect, and have no patience for someone not showing humility or commitment. Especially on the second damn class.0 -
so is it beyond the instructor just to say you are too late for my class come back next time.?I think that people forget that MA instructors didn't get a certificate on the wall from a 2 day workshop.
They trained diligently for several decades to earn their title. Most MAs are steeped in Eastern tradition, which revolves around respect and honor. Respect has been demanded of them by their teachers, and they in turn demand the respect of their students. There's a reason you refer to them as 'Master' or 'Grandmaster'.
Most MAs have minimum time requirements between black belt grades. It varies, but you can expect to spend three years earning 1st Dan. Then you are required to train at least another two years before 2nd Dan, no matter how good you are. Then three years for 3rd Dan. Four more years for 4th Dan, etc...
So if you're being taught by a Master (varies by style, but lowest Master I've known is 4th Dan), you can work on about 10 to 12 years of experience at minimum. If you are privileged enough to be taught by an 8th Dan Grandmaster, you can expect that they have been training for nearly four decades at a minimum.
You bet your *kitten* they demand respect, and have no patience for someone not showing humility or commitment. Especially on the second damn class.0 -
NO. A person's situation means nothing. Late is late. You're 15 minutes late, you don't interrupt the class. I don't care if you pulled your car over to give mouth to mouth resuscitation to Jesus Christ on the cross, you still don't get to inconvenience 20 other people.
Haha such delightful nonsense!
They were in a boxing/thai boxing class not managing air traffic control. The class does not fall apart if the instructor has to say "warm up and join in for the next set of reps" to someone who was late.
Thanks for using your first sentence to inform us the rest of your post is nonsense. You were correct about that.
Shouldve probably kept that one to yourself....
You keep reinforcing that all you have to offer is nonsense.0 -
I think that people forget that MA instructors didn't get a certificate on the wall from a 2 day workshop.
They trained diligently for several decades to earn their title. Most MAs are steeped in Eastern tradition, which revolves around respect and honor. Respect has been demanded of them by their teachers, and they in turn demand the respect of their students. There's a reason you refer to them as 'Master' or 'Grandmaster'.
Most MAs have minimum time requirements between black belt grades. It varies, but you can expect to spend three years earning 1st Dan. Then you are required to train at least another two years before 2nd Dan, no matter how good you are. Then three years for 3rd Dan. Four more years for 4th Dan, etc...
So if you're being taught by a Master (varies by style, but lowest Master I've known is 4th Dan), you can work on about 10 to 12 years of experience at minimum. If you are privileged enough to be taught by an 8th Dan Grandmaster, you can expect that they have been training for nearly four decades at a minimum.
You bet your *kitten* they demand respect, and have no patience for someone not showing humility or commitment. Especially on the second damn class.
I doubt a highly trained and experienced MA instructor would act so childish. They would simply tell her to leave. MA instructors are usually level headed and humble people with a high standard of propriety. I have never met a MA instructor with an inflated ego. Demanding respect and treating other disrespectfully do not go hand in hand.0 -
not to mention the OP payed for the class so is a customer, the class wasnt a freebie.
so is it beyond the instructor just to say you are too late for my class come back next time.?I think that people forget that MA instructors didn't get a certificate on the wall from a 2 day workshop.
They trained diligently for several decades to earn their title. Most MAs are steeped in Eastern tradition, which revolves around respect and honor. Respect has been demanded of them by their teachers, and they in turn demand the respect of their students. There's a reason you refer to them as 'Master' or 'Grandmaster'.
Most MAs have minimum time requirements between black belt grades. It varies, but you can expect to spend three years earning 1st Dan. Then you are required to train at least another two years before 2nd Dan, no matter how good you are. Then three years for 3rd Dan. Four more years for 4th Dan, etc...
So if you're being taught by a Master (varies by style, but lowest Master I've known is 4th Dan), you can work on about 10 to 12 years of experience at minimum. If you are privileged enough to be taught by an 8th Dan Grandmaster, you can expect that they have been training for nearly four decades at a minimum.
You bet your *kitten* they demand respect, and have no patience for someone not showing humility or commitment. Especially on the second damn class.0 -
not to mention the OP payed for the class so is a customer, the class wasnt a freebie.
so is it beyond the instructor just to say you are too late for my class come back next time.?I think that people forget that MA instructors didn't get a certificate on the wall from a 2 day workshop.
They trained diligently for several decades to earn their title. Most MAs are steeped in Eastern tradition, which revolves around respect and honor. Respect has been demanded of them by their teachers, and they in turn demand the respect of their students. There's a reason you refer to them as 'Master' or 'Grandmaster'.
Most MAs have minimum time requirements between black belt grades. It varies, but you can expect to spend three years earning 1st Dan. Then you are required to train at least another two years before 2nd Dan, no matter how good you are. Then three years for 3rd Dan. Four more years for 4th Dan, etc...
So if you're being taught by a Master (varies by style, but lowest Master I've known is 4th Dan), you can work on about 10 to 12 years of experience at minimum. If you are privileged enough to be taught by an 8th Dan Grandmaster, you can expect that they have been training for nearly four decades at a minimum.
You bet your *kitten* they demand respect, and have no patience for someone not showing humility or commitment. Especially on the second damn class.
So did every other student that the OP was inconveniencing. Show up on time or don't show ... it doesn't matter if it's a fitness class, movie, flight, or concert. The start time is part of the social contract for the entire group. The OP broke it with their actions.0 -
not to mention the OP payed for the class so is a customer, the class wasnt a freebie.
so is it beyond the instructor just to say you are too late for my class come back next time.?I think that people forget that MA instructors didn't get a certificate on the wall from a 2 day workshop.
They trained diligently for several decades to earn their title. Most MAs are steeped in Eastern tradition, which revolves around respect and honor. Respect has been demanded of them by their teachers, and they in turn demand the respect of their students. There's a reason you refer to them as 'Master' or 'Grandmaster'.
Most MAs have minimum time requirements between black belt grades. It varies, but you can expect to spend three years earning 1st Dan. Then you are required to train at least another two years before 2nd Dan, no matter how good you are. Then three years for 3rd Dan. Four more years for 4th Dan, etc...
So if you're being taught by a Master (varies by style, but lowest Master I've known is 4th Dan), you can work on about 10 to 12 years of experience at minimum. If you are privileged enough to be taught by an 8th Dan Grandmaster, you can expect that they have been training for nearly four decades at a minimum.
You bet your *kitten* they demand respect, and have no patience for someone not showing humility or commitment. Especially on the second damn class.
So did every other student that the OP was inconveniencing. Show up on time or don't show ... it doesn't matter if it's a fitness class, movie, flight, or concert. The start time is part of the social contract for the entire group. The OP broke it with their actions.
And my question was why cant the instructor let her know where she stands so she knows?
People are late sometimes get over it.0
This discussion has been closed.
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