Why is MFP so mean??

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  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
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    Then why do it? Why keep opening and responding when it's so frustrating that you feel the need to be mean?

    Many time these "mean" people are being honest, straight-forward, or just blunt. Not the same as being mean. Also having different opinions is often interpreted as being mean.

    I disagree. I saw one poor person discuss her opinions about sugar this morning and bam 8 or 9 pages of personality disordered evil. A few nights ago someone posted they might have realized they are drinking too much, and page after page of "just work it into your calories. I still drink (burp)" People need fitness for a lot of different reasons: some people are sick, some were never taught a decent relationship with food, or sugar, or alcohol. The OP suggests that the reason we came on here was to learn the truth which she then immediately conflates with accepting abuse. I just wish people would understand that you may prefer your truth administered with a hammer, but others have a right to their path as well. Mean people suck. :flowerforyou:

    So, you are saying that different people receive information differently? Kind of like different people give information differently?

    Message forums are an outlet for different people with different backgrounds and different opinions to come together to discuss ideas. As you admit, people are here for a variety of different reasons. So, all this said, I don't know how you can generalize all responses to be abusive.

    And, for the record, what's wrong with saying just fit alcohol into your macros? That's not mean. That's true. Unless there's a more serious problem, which is not really something anyone here should be addressing with authority.
  • rachelrb85
    rachelrb85 Posts: 579 Member
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    WTF is going on in here
    ????

    1. Mean people support thread started
    2. Couple people tried to argue against meanies
    3. Arguments were de-bunked
    4. Continue on with the gifs
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
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    Oh, I'm not saying their isn't a lot of arguing on these points. That's usually when it gets "mean". I'm just saying my limited exerience has been more "don't eat this" posts.

    So then I think you would be grateful to the MFP-ers who join the discussion to debunk whatever the myth of the day is, no?

    I really don't know how to respond to that because I'm not sure what you mean.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
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    Oh, I'm not saying their isn't a lot of arguing on these points. That's usually when it gets "mean". I'm just saying my limited exerience has been more "don't eat this" posts.

    So then I think you would be grateful to the MFP-ers who join the discussion to debunk whatever the myth of the day is, no?

    I really don't know how to respond to that because I'm not sure what you mean.

    You mentioned how all the posts you see are "don't eat" posts. From the way you presented that argument, I assume that you don't like the "don't eat" posts. Is this correct?
  • MissBMazes
    MissBMazes Posts: 3 Member
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    Great information thank you!
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
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    tumblr_luyv4wYgc61qjmhggo1_500.gif
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
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    3631418+_5516d10213e278c0d12d3b4b6399e92a.jpg
  • sjaplo
    sjaplo Posts: 974 Member
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    Then why do it? Why keep opening and responding when it's so frustrating that you feel the need to be mean?

    Many time these "mean" people are being honest, straight-forward, or just blunt. Not the same as being mean. Also having different opinions is often interpreted as being mean.

    I disagree. I saw one poor person discuss her opinions about sugar this morning and bam 8 or 9 pages of personality disordered evil. A few nights ago someone posted they might have realized they are drinking too much, and page after page of "just work it into your calories. I still drink (burp)" People need fitness for a lot of different reasons: some people are sick, some were never taught a decent relationship with food, or sugar, or alcohol. The OP suggests that the reason we came on here was to learn the truth which she then immediately conflates with accepting abuse. I just wish people would understand that you may prefer your truth administered with a hammer, but others have a right to their path as well. Mean people suck. :flowerforyou:

    This would be exactly the point. You saw a person post their factually incorrect opinion about sugar and the disordered evil arrived to disabuse her of that notion. Now the alternative is for the disordered evil to let chaos reign and allow everyone to post whatever crap Dr OZ and his evil minions are spouting that particualr day, at which point all the gullable people who run from fad diet to fad diet will glom on to the new saviour and all will crash and burn in their "diets" and come on wailing that their doing everything right and they are gaining weight.

    As for the alcohol - it's true, you can drink alcohol, in my case beer, daily and "loose" weight. 19lbs and counting thank you very much.

    Those who are sick should seek professional help, not advice from an internet forum.

    For my money the "mean" ones are those who start their threads with the eqivalent of "don't answer unless you agree with me"

    cheers all.:drinker:
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
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    Then why do it? Why keep opening and responding when it's so frustrating that you feel the need to be mean?

    Many time these "mean" people are being honest, straight-forward, or just blunt. Not the same as being mean. Also having different opinions is often interpreted as being mean.

    I disagree. I saw one poor person discuss her opinions about sugar this morning and bam 8 or 9 pages of personality disordered evil. A few nights ago someone posted they might have realized they are drinking too much, and page after page of "just work it into your calories. I still drink (burp)" People need fitness for a lot of different reasons: some people are sick, some were never taught a decent relationship with food, or sugar, or alcohol. The OP suggests that the reason we came on here was to learn the truth which she then immediately conflates with accepting abuse. I just wish people would understand that you may prefer your truth administered with a hammer, but others have a right to their path as well. Mean people suck. :flowerforyou:

    bd2e59987c932e56dbc7f8f0240b9ccad854e45491e3d886cafa761bec8d428f.jpg
  • Raclex
    Raclex Posts: 238
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    1roZvra.jpg

    ^^This. Love this.
  • Mrs_Marvel
    Mrs_Marvel Posts: 39 Member
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    Because we're hungry...
  • disneygallagirl
    disneygallagirl Posts: 515 Member
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    Well, for one thing we're hungry and that makes us cranky.

    For another many of the ladies here seem to hang with this shady dude named TOM. He seems to put them in a bad mood.

    Thank you for that wonderful laugh!
    Yup that cracked me up :laugh:
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
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    Then why do it? Why keep opening and responding when it's so frustrating that you feel the need to be mean?

    Many time these "mean" people are being honest, straight-forward, or just blunt. Not the same as being mean. Also having different opinions is often interpreted as being mean.

    I disagree. I saw one poor person discuss her opinions about sugar this morning and bam 8 or 9 pages of personality disordered evil. A few nights ago someone posted they might have realized they are drinking too much, and page after page of "just work it into your calories. I still drink (burp)" People need fitness for a lot of different reasons: some people are sick, some were never taught a decent relationship with food, or sugar, or alcohol. The OP suggests that the reason we came on here was to learn the truth which she then immediately conflates with accepting abuse. I just wish people would understand that you may prefer your truth administered with a hammer, but others have a right to their path as well. Mean people suck. :flowerforyou:

    This would be exactly the point. You saw a person post their factually incorrect opinion about sugar and the disordered evil arrived to disabuse her of that notion. Now the alternative is for the disordered evil to let chaos reign and allow everyone to post whatever crap Dr OZ and his evil minions are spouting that particualr day, at which point all the gullable people who run from fad diet to fad diet will glom on to the new saviour and all will crash and burn in their "diets" and come on wailing that their doing everything right and they are gaining weight.

    As for the alcohol - it's true, you can drink alcohol, in my case beer, daily and "loose" weight. 19lbs and counting thank you very much.

    Those who are sick should seek professional help, not advice from an internet forum.

    For my money the "mean" ones are those who start their threads with the eqivalent of "don't answer unless you agree with me"

    cheers all.:drinker:

    tumblr_lxtd14Qo741r98rqco1_400.gif
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
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    Oh, I'm not saying their isn't a lot of arguing on these points. That's usually when it gets "mean". I'm just saying my limited exerience has been more "don't eat this" posts.

    So then I think you would be grateful to the MFP-ers who join the discussion to debunk whatever the myth of the day is, no?

    I really don't know how to respond to that because I'm not sure what you mean.

    You mentioned how all the posts you see are "don't eat" posts. From the way you presented that argument, I assume that you don't like the "don't eat" posts. Is this correct?

    I would like to say yes, but since I keep reading and responding to them I suppose I'd be lying.
  • angf0679
    angf0679 Posts: 1,120 Member
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    Marking so I can read more when I get home from work (and my run)
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    Then why do it? Why keep opening and responding when it's so frustrating that you feel the need to be mean?

    Many time these "mean" people are being honest, straight-forward, or just blunt. Not the same as being mean. Also having different opinions is often interpreted as being mean.

    I disagree. I saw one poor person discuss her opinions about sugar this morning and bam 8 or 9 pages of personality disordered evil. A few nights ago someone posted they might have realized they are drinking too much, and page after page of "just work it into your calories. I still drink (burp)" People need fitness for a lot of different reasons: some people are sick, some were never taught a decent relationship with food, or sugar, or alcohol. The OP suggests that the reason we came on here was to learn the truth which she then immediately conflates with accepting abuse. I just wish people would understand that you may prefer your truth administered with a hammer, but others have a right to their path as well. Mean people suck. :flowerforyou:

    mehhhhh- mean people have their place- I qualify as "mean" but I'm just sarcastic and generally blatently honest.

    They have their place. Plus they tend to be funnier people.



    secondly -sugar girl's thread? really mean people thread over that? She was wrong. You can't just flat out saying something is BAD on a chemical/long term health level is kind of a big deal- and it needs to be addressed- that's not "just discussing an opinion"

    her post was 100% sold as FACT. had she actually been wanting to discuss it- it might have turned out differently.

    She should have taken her own advice
    We must educate ourselves

    but ACTUALLY educate- yourself rather than just grasping into hyperspace random things that are opinions and not facts or proven trend lines.
  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
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    In way too late to the party. Damn volunteering and my kids school. :grumble: :laugh:
  • AmyRhubarb
    AmyRhubarb Posts: 6,890 Member
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    i think the bottom line is that a forum is a poor place to go to learn things, particularly on a subject like fitness where there typically isn't one clear cut answer on many aspects.

    if people went into it understanding that all they really are going to get is opinions, maybe they would take those opinions less personally.
    I disagree - the absolute best advice I've received has been right here on the MFP forums. And I have great success with the information I have chosen to follow, and I continue to pass along what I have learned when other people ask questions. Do I believe or try every little thing I've read here? Of course not. I read, consider, follow up with, compare to other info, and it pretty much came down to finding people here who have had the sort of success I was looking for, to find what they were doing, and to apply it to my own plan. The best advice usually had links to other sites for more information, or books to read, or workout programs to check out.

    Whatever - I never felt insulted, mistreated, offended by any "mean" people. Love this place and have logged consistently for just over 3 years now because it's so awesome.

    I do often see people misinterpret a straight answer as mean-spirited. Too many aren't really looking for good advice, but rather affirmation from others on whatever diet, cleanse, or plan they are bent on trying. Anyone who says it's not a good idea and offers an alternative is considered mean and rude. :tongue:
  • socalkay
    socalkay Posts: 746 Member
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    There's a way to have a discussion and present your point of view and/or information without being rude and unkind. The fact that this keeps coming up is an indication that there's a consistent pattern of behavior that hurts/alienates people, rather than helps them use the site in a healthy manner. When you drive some newbie from the site, you aren't helping them.
  • 1Cor1510
    1Cor1510 Posts: 413 Member
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    In to read later after I count my wine for the evening into my calories for the day :drinker:

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