What's the worst thing someone has said to about being overw

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Replies

  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
    On a recent visit my mom and were shopping, which I will not look at clothes with her b/c of my size but she looked at me a said you gained all your weight back! I said yes I did. The next day she looked at me ans said "oh, your not as big as you were, must have been the clothes, only gained some back.

    Of course this is the woman that once picked out a shirt and asked "if they had it in a non-fat size" to which my sister responded"that's my size" She looked so disappointed!
  • ladymoonlite
    ladymoonlite Posts: 273 Member
    this came from my mom...she told me that my boyfriend would never love me with the body i have and that hes probably cheating on me with a beautiful skinny woman....and im always compared to the pretty girls skinny and that love to dress like all pretty and all im totally different compared to them (im weird, listen to the music they hate, and dress a whole lot different to what they expect)


    i cried soo much and im so low on myself when it comes to looks :/..

    O.M.G... What kind of mother DOES that??? You're gorgeous sweetie, don't listen to her!

    aww thanks :) that made me feel good..

    a mother is always the toughest critic in my opinion... she said she was trying to give me a reason to lose weight. and also of course tryin to change the way i am. but itll nvr happen cuz thats just how i am... im just unique...
  • HoLLyZ82
    HoLLyZ82 Posts: 467 Member
    the things people say disgust me. some of the things ive read on here blow my mind. im sorry anyone has had to deal with that pain. i remember when i was a freshman in college i was horribly sick and lost about 10 lbs. keep in mind before this 10 lbs i was pretty darn healthy and probably only weighing 140, if that. anyways, i remember my boyfriend at the time coming in while i was showering and looking at me and he said, 'WOW! you would look really good if you stayed that size.' i instantly teared up because 1) i was SICK and 2) i couldnt believe the *kitten* comment that just came out of his mouth.
  • HaleyAlli
    HaleyAlli Posts: 911 Member
    this came from my mom...she told me that my boyfriend would never love me with the body i have and that hes probably cheating on me with a beautiful skinny woman....and im always compared to the pretty girls skinny and that love to dress like all pretty and all im totally different compared to them (im weird, listen to the music they hate, and dress a whole lot different to what they expect)


    i cried soo much and im so low on myself when it comes to looks :/..

    O.M.G... What kind of mother DOES that??? You're gorgeous sweetie, don't listen to her!

    aww thanks :) that made me feel good..

    a mother is always the toughest critic in my opinion... she said she was trying to give me a reason to lose weight. and also of course tryin to change the way i am. but itll nvr happen cuz thats just how i am... im just unique...

    You're welcome! And don't ever change who you are unless it's a healthy change! No one can choose who you become but YOU!!
  • Driagnor
    Driagnor Posts: 323 Member
    The worst has been with strangers in the street shouting out things about my man boobs. That's quite humiliating. On a funnier note though, I'm able to joke with my family about it, and when I mentioned to my mother that I was considering getting a skinhead a few years back, she said to me, "Don't be ridiculous. You'd look like an egg sitting on top of a f**king globe" :)
  • ladymoonlite
    ladymoonlite Posts: 273 Member
    this came from my mom...she told me that my boyfriend would never love me with the body i have and that hes probably cheating on me with a beautiful skinny woman....and im always compared to the pretty girls skinny and that love to dress like all pretty and all im totally different compared to them (im weird, listen to the music they hate, and dress a whole lot different to what they expect)


    i cried soo much and im so low on myself when it comes to looks :/..

    O.M.G... What kind of mother DOES that??? You're gorgeous sweetie, don't listen to her!

    aww thanks :) that made me feel good..

    a mother is always the toughest critic in my opinion... she said she was trying to give me a reason to lose weight. and also of course tryin to change the way i am. but itll nvr happen cuz thats just how i am... im just unique...

    You're welcome! And don't ever change who you are unless it's a healthy change! No one can choose who you become but YOU!!



    i told her that!!! but shes one of those moms that is rite no matter what..and she does get mad if i defend myself...its also hurtful because she hates my bf and would say anything to make me leave him..but as well she hates lady gaga and i bumped the song born this way hahahaha
  • CMH24
    CMH24 Posts: 101 Member
    Where to start......

    I had every nickname in middle school (including stupid things like Bacon and Flubber) I was tripped and shoved. I was tortured so bad I would leave school crying... just for being over weight. I must add my school had 300 kids k-12 so it was VERY small, I was THE fat kid to make fun of (even though I wasn't the biggest)

    It turned out a guy I was dating WAY back when and all of his friends would sit and make me the center of their jokes all day. kicked him to the curb pretty quick.

    I wouldn't get invited to places, like pool parties, because of the swim suit factor. Awesome friends huh?

    I have to say though, my family has ALWAYS been supportive and I can't ever remember a time that any of them have EVER commented on my weight. In fact, my brother got into a fist fight with one of the guys that were bullying me and kicked the *kitten* out of him. (I don't like fighting but there are circumstances where big brothers just can't watch it any more)

    I have to say I am proud of each and every one of you for not letting it get you down. I have had friends who were so petite they were on the opposite end of it. One of them, people would pick up like she was a 5 year old all the time and she just wanted to be treated like an adult. It isn't just overweight that is an issue and I hope we can all be better examples for our children than what was previously taught to kids!
  • julslea
    julslea Posts: 436 Member
    When a distant relative found out I was preggo and made a coment to my stepmom that she hoped the pregnancy didn't have any complications due to my weight.
  • neverdull
    neverdull Posts: 6
    My mom was signing both me and my older sister up for gymnastics one summer. I heard her talking on the phone to the instructor and asked if we would be able to do all the activities because we were both chubby. At the time, I know I was not chubby, but I sure seemed to balloon up after that comment. Needless to say, I try to be very careful what I say about my daughter and what I say about my current weight. I don't need my own daughter feeling crappy about herself.
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    On a recent visit my mom and were shopping, which I will not look at clothes with her b/c of my size but she looked at me a said you gained all your weight back! I said yes I did. The next day she looked at me ans said "oh, your not as big as you were, must have been the clothes, only gained some back.

    Of course this is the woman that once picked out a shirt and asked "if they had it in a non-fat size" to which my sister responded"that's my size" She looked so disappointed!

    Wow....ya know the ONLY person who has NEVER put me down for any reason has been my mom.....I am so sorry...can't imagine having to hear my mom saying something like that or the other things that ppl have shared on here that their mom has said...
    * hugs *
  • nuemmedigg
    nuemmedigg Posts: 220 Member
    While reading all your posts, my heart goes out to you. Especially to those of you who had someone close to you say something. I've been labeled pregnant by mistake many times, and it didn't offend me, because it came from people who wanted to help with carrying groceries, or who wanted to congratulate. So that was not out of being mean-spirited and I took no offense, I know how I look.
    I was called repulsive by someone very close, and that was after having lost some weight already. I decided not to go into "eat your pain away" mode and continue on MFP, but I tear up each time I think about it.
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    BUMP
  • When I was 16 - and I wasn't even really overweight at the time, I was about 10 lbs. above my normal weight - my father said, out of the blue while we were chatting casually about something else, "You know, I think you're going to end up just like Christine." Christine is my cousin, and is obese. That one really crushed me. :frown:

    The other one that really sticks out is a shopping trip with my mom, I think I was 17. I was trying on clothes, and again, I was only about 10 lbs. above my normal weight, not extremely overweight (not that hurtful comments would be okay even if I was) and while trying on pants, it became obvious that 8s fit me best. Upon noticing this, my mother examined the tags with the sizes, clicked disapprovingly, and said, "You really need to go out for a bike ride when we get home. Do you want to be fat? Because I'm telling you right now, you keep letting yourself gain weight, you're not going to have the opportunities you want in life. You say you want a career; do you think anyone's going to hire you if you're fat? They're not. They'll hire the skinny applicant, not you. Do you want to end up alone? Men aren't interested in fat women; you're not going to get married to the kind of man you want (FTR, I'd never expressed a preference regarding what kind of man I wanted because I didn't want men anyway, except maybe a rare few; I was queer and closeted) if you're fat. NO ONE likes fat people. I'm telling you this from experience, so you need to give your head a shake and start exercising and get skinny." I'm not a crier, especially in front of people, but I cried my eyes out right in that store. :sad:

    Yeah, goooood times. :brokenheart:

    ETA: Oh, and another lovely one from my mother. After I asked an employee at a bus station if I could use a bit of food to coax an injured pigeon to me so that I could take it to a wildlife centre (generally feeding the pigeons is not allowed, understandably) and he said no, "Psssht. If you were skinny, he would have said yes."
  • MarkNH
    MarkNH Posts: 65 Member
    You're as fat as your father was - It's such a shame . . . You know it's what killed him and it will probably kill you too.

    *and yes, this was perhaps the most hurtful of the many "wonderful" comments that came from my family members.


    My father, who was the center of my universe had his heart-attack at 42. Life was never the same . . .
  • CityGirlLost
    CityGirlLost Posts: 4 Member
    When my ex-husband and I were dating, he once told me that I would be absolutely stunning if I just lost 40 pounds. That comment has stuck with me for 12 years. I guess that's why he's now my EX-husband!
  • KateCon912
    KateCon912 Posts: 200 Member
    I never really had anyone in school make fun of me (that I can remember)... but my family would always notice if i gained half a pound and would point to my stomach in front of everyone and say how I needed to work on that. Or they would grab my side fat and pinch it without saying anything. :( that was really depressing when it was coming from my own family.
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    When I was 16 - and I wasn't even really overweight at the time, I was about 10 lbs. above my normal weight - my father said, out of the blue while we were chatting casually about something else, "You know, I think you're going to end up just like Christine." Christine is my cousin, and is obese. That one really crushed me. :frown:

    The other one that really sticks out is a shopping trip with my mom, I think I was 17. I was trying on clothes, and again, I was only about 10 lbs. above my normal weight, not extremely overweight (not that hurtful comments would be okay even if I was) and while trying on pants, it became obvious that 8s fit me best. Upon noticing this, my mother examined the tags with the sizes, clicked disapprovingly, and said, "You really need to go out for a bike ride when we get home. Do you want to be fat? Because I'm telling you right now, you keep letting yourself gain weight, you're not going to have the opportunities you want in life. You say you want a career; do you think anyone's going to hire you if you're fat? They're not. They'll hire the skinny applicant, not you. Do you want to end up alone? Men aren't interested in fat women; you're not going to get married to the kind of man you want (FTR, I'd never expressed a preference regarding what kind of man I wanted because I didn't want men anyway, except maybe a rare few; I was queer and closeted) if you're fat. NO ONE likes fat people. I'm telling you this from experience, so you need to give your head a shake and start exercising and get skinny." I'm not a crier, especially in front of people, but I cried my eyes out right in that store. :sad:

    Yeah, goooood times. :brokenheart:

    ETA: Oh, and another lovely one from my mother. After I asked an employee at a bus station if I could use a bit of food to coax an injured pigeon to me so that I could take it to a wildlife centre (generally feeding the pigeons is not allowed, understandably) and he said no, "Psssht. If you were skinny, he would have said yes."

    THIS is heart wrenching :brokenheart: ...sheesh!!! what a lecture in a store...gosh!!!
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    I never really had anyone in school make fun of me (that I can remember)... but my family would always notice if i gained half a pound and would point to my stomach in front of everyone and say how I needed to work on that. Or they would grab my side fat and pinch it without saying anything. :( that was really depressing when it was coming from my own family.

    ALL my family would do that to me too...so annoying....
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    You're as fat as your father was - It's such a shame . . . You know it's what killed him and it will probably kill you too.

    *and yes, this was perhaps the most hurtful of the many "wonderful" comments that came from my family members.


    My father, who was the center of my universe had his heart-attack at 42. Life was never the same . . .

    I am really sorry about your dad. I also can't believe someone would have the nerve to go there with you after is death....
    * shaking my head*
  • the most hurtful comment came from my best friend in high school. it was when i was 60 pounds thinner than i am now and pretty deep into my restricting behaviors (that was way before the binging started). she got into the habit of calling my "Skelator" and said that everyone at school (including her boyfriend who i cared for as a friend) thought i was gross because i was too thin. i remember one day on vacation when she refused to rub sunscreen on my back because my spine grossed her out. granted i was way too thin at the time, it was extremely hurtful.

    one thing i've noticed since gaining weight is that people seem less courteous. i swear people used to hold open doors and say hello out of the blue but that doesn't seem to happen anymore. whenever i lose weight, people get polite all of a sudden. it's weird...whenever i gain weight i seem to become invisible : /
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    the most hurtful comment came from my best friend in high school. it was when i was 60 pounds thinner than i am now and pretty deep into my restricting behaviors (that was way before the binging started). she got into the habit of calling my "Skelator" and said that everyone at school (including her boyfriend who i cared for as a friend) thought i was gross because i was too thin. i remember one day on vacation when she refused to rub sunscreen on my back because my spine grossed her out. granted i was way too thin at the time, it was extremely hurtful.

    one thing i've noticed since gaining weight is that people seem less courteous. i swear people used to hold open doors and say hello out of the blue but that doesn't seem to happen anymore. whenever i lose weight, people get polite all of a sudden. it's weird...whenever i gain weight i seem to become invisible : /

    I have had that happen to me too (being more nice when I am thinner)...very strange but a noticable difference.
  • i don't know you but you seem like a wonderful and kind person.
  • whoops meant to reply to a specific comment. lots of painful stories on here....it's good to get it out though
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    i don't know you but you seem like a wonderful and kind person.

    Thank you :smile:
  • Gemini80
    Gemini80 Posts: 15 Member
    When I was heavier, I was asked once when I was due.
    A male friend of mine use to tell me that I would be stripper hot, if i lost some weight...and everytime he saw me he would grab a little fat from my arm and say " You haven't been working out"

    Now, back when I was a kid, say middle school days, I was picked on because I was too skinny.
  • of course : ) it always makes me sad to see nice people go through this. anyone that goes that far out of their way to hurt others is obviously dealing with their own issues
  • When I was heavier, I was asked once when I was due.
    A male friend of mine use to tell me that I would be stripper hot, if i lost some weight...and everytime he saw me he would grab a little fat from my arm and say " You haven't been working out"

    Now, back when I was a kid, say middle school days, I was picked on because I was too skinny.

    that's awful! what a jerk
  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    I've been the fat kid pretty much all my life. I remember being called a fatty even back in elementary school. I was babysitting once a few years ago... I was about 220, 5'7" then so still fat but not like shockingly fat or anything... The 7 year old boy... (who was every bit of 90 pounds) kept punching my fat, and calling me fat - this was from a family that is very big on manners yet also kind of judgemental... I told someone about it a while later they said that little kids don't think it hurts you to punch fat... like a pillow or something... So I not only remember this, but had a couple bruises to show for it... never told the parents, but also never came back.

    A few months ago... and I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it, but just wasn't thinking, she told me how a boyfriend broke up with her "because she was too skinny" then proceeds to say "but you should see the girl he is with now, he makes YOU look tiny..." I'm in the 260's now, still 5'7" but I've been told I carry my weight really well... I wanted to say... yeah... compared to this person YOU would be considered attractive... I just held my tongue. the list goes on and on. Don't think people realize just how much what their off handed comments can stick with people.
  • Oh, and I should add, you really can't win. When I hit my normal, healthy weight (114 lbs.) a few years ago, I had my mother, my friends, and my ex making comments about how I looked too thin, that I'd better not lose any more weight or I'd start looking "gross", saying my face looked too skeletal, and questioning whether I had an eating disorder. I'd like everyone to just shut up about my body unless they have something constructive to say ("Hey, you're looking really fit, good for you!" or whatnot). Ugh. :angry:
  • When I was heavier, I was asked once when I was due.
    A male friend of mine use to tell me that I would be stripper hot, if i lost some weight...and everytime he saw me he would grab a little fat from my arm and say " You haven't been working out"

    Now, back when I was a kid, say middle school days, I was picked on because I was too skinny.

    that's awful! what a jerk

    this kind of chauvinism makes the good men out there look bad!
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