I Do Not Want to be Thin

I don't want to be thin.

I tell myself that smaller doesn't mean weak, but the idea of being smaller still scares me.

I equate weight loss in the healthy BMI range to be vanity weight loss. I know that isn't true, but that is my knee-jerk reaction.

I don't like the thin look. I prefer the athletic look, that sometimes comes with a higher BMI.

I don't want to be noticed. I like how being larger makes me invisible (an intriguing paradox).

I don't believe I will ever be attractive, irrespective of weight.

Losing weight in my face makes my facial assymetry more evident, and I prefer the generic look of my obese face to the ugliness of my current overweight face (and I can't see losing much more fat off my face at this point).

Losing weight is depressing. I don't feel at all like the people do in the commercials for weight loss products. I just feel like an insecure failure as the weight comes off.

I don't want people to honk at me as I walk down the street (as used to happen when I was lighter). I don't want attention from the opposite sex (I'm a little afraid of it).

I hate that my weight loss makes my boyfriend feel insecure.

Strangers are approaching me to ask how much weight I've lost (125 lbs), telling me my weight loss is heroic and amazing. People I know tell me I'm an inspiration. I'm afraid of this pressure. I don't know that I'll succeed at weight loss (get to goal weight of 140 lbs) I don't know if I'll be able to keep it off. My progress is visible, my failure will be impossible to hide.

I've essentially been told by my brother to stop losing weight, even though I am 6 lbs from a "healthy" BMI. This is the same brother who used to pressure me to lose weight. My weight loss is causing both my daughters to reflect on their own weight. My older daughter has repeatedly said she is worried I'm getting an eating disorder...

Weight loss just seems to make me sad and stressed.

I do want to be stronger.

I want to be the one who pushes harder, moves faster, and stays strong through a sparring match. I want to see if I can run 20 k straight (I did 12 k on Monday a bit by accident). I want to run faster. I want to be able to do a chin up. I want to be able to do good quality push ups. I just managed to be able to do 90 degree squats, I now want to be able to do them with weights, and to get in and out of them quickly. I want to do better quality situps more quickly. I want more flexibility. I want to feel confident carrying my daughters on my back. I want the energy to take care of my home and children. I want more muscles and less belly.

Being stronger makes me happy (sometimes jubilant).

I don't want to be thin, I do want to be strong. I think I will end up moving a little more towards both as part of the process...

Whatever the motivation, best wishes to everyone on the journey.

@PikaKnight No studies, huh? You are assuming that the healthiest people are within a certain body fat ratio. But you don't know.

And to be clear, I'm not talking obesity here which comes with known health risks. I'm talking "overweight".

jgnatca wrote: »

@PikaKnight No studies, huh? You are assuming that the healthiest people are within a certain body fat ratio. But you don't know.

And to be clear, I'm not talking obesity here which comes with known health risks. I'm talking "overweight".

What? No I'm not. You are totally making some crazy assumptions there.

I simply pointed out that there was a possibility that since the study focuses solely on the scale number, that they may have included those with lower body fat %...when taking that into account, the person actually isn't "overweight".

This was about the chart. Why the hell would I need to post up studies based on pointing out a possible flaw in the study based on the common flaw on BMI on a whole?

And please point out where I stated anything about body fat % and health/mortality ratio too, while you're at it.

jgnatca wrote: »

There's a difference between being obese and overweight. The chart I provided showed better outcomes for those who are overweight over ideal weight.

BMI is a load of crap. The chart you showed doesn't discriminate between body fat and lean mass. You can have a lot of lean mass (muscles) and be overweight by the BMI standard.
/fail

FlabFighter86 wrote: »

I'm sure your body could be a size 8 but it's fine if you don't want to be a size 8.

It really couldn't. If I had lost any more weight, I would literally be a stick with boobs. We're talking barbie doll figure here. And no, I really don't want to be a size 8.

I highly doubt that. [/quote]

Do not understand why people are arguing with me about my own body...[/quote]

Because it just sounds like excuses.

Why not take people at their word about their own bodies? A woman's rib cage may be too wide for a size 8. Is she making excuses?

My weight loss goal, considering my age and history, is considered realistic between me and my dietitian. I have lost enough weight to be mobile, which is what I really wanted.

FlabFighter86 wrote: »

Excuses for what? I just said that I would be happy being a size 12. I also said that I don't want to be a size 8. I have previously been a size 10, and people told me not to lose more weight because I wouldn't look right. I agreed with them.
So, I don't understand why one person can't just decide to be a size 12 and not a size 8. Do we all have to be aiming for a size 8 here now?

I don’t know what “wouldn’t look right” means. It could mean “if you get any thinner I'll start feeling insecure about my own weight”. Just saying.

But anyway, whatever makes you happy! I personally wouldn’t trust “people”, is all.

Has this thread now gone from "rethink your goals if you want to be thin" to "rethink your goals if you don't want to be thin"? Because it kind of feels like it's going that way.

jgnatca wrote: »

Okay? What was the point of this?