After 40...what's with the choice between face and body?!!!
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I hear ya but it's only in certain lights that my scrawny neck looks bad and my lines more pronounced....despite less plump skin I'm happier in my slimmer body, i love being fit, strong and lean so I guess I'll just live with the face
make up and hairstyle can work wonders 
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crazyjerseygirl wrote: »So a few notes
1: every pic in there had smiling well lit plump person vs. Harshly lit scowling slim person.
2: loosing weight takes time, what are the differences in years between those photos.
How long have you been overweight? Are you sure this isn't how you would have looked slim if you had never gained?
1. Maybe - but i don't think lighting explains all those differences there.
2. I don't know for sure. But I saw the changes kicking in over night, as I lost these last lbs.
I was overweight on and off since the age of 15. Nice, huh?
I had a period during my late 20's-early 30's when I slimmed down significantly and had a perfect weight.
When I got married, at the age of 28, a friend who had not seen me in a while told me that "I looked great being so slim and all...but I must stop with the weight loss because my face cheeks had fallen".
So maybe it is my genetics too as I know I kind of inherited flat cheeks from my family...but still.
I think the recent weight loss has accelerated the aging process in the face - and I want my pretty darn face back. :-)
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Botox and fillers can really go a long way, and ERMEGERD do I miss being able to afford that stuff.0
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wisdomfromyou wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »So you're saying ...run, don't walk, to the plastic surgeon's office, correct?
Only if you can't handle aging gracefully*.
*which - SCREW THAT lol
Doesn't look like it.
Note how the advice to consider "aging gracefully" usually comes from the 40 yo-s and below.
In today's society "aging gracefully" is almost a joke.
As someone said somewhere on the net, there's nothing "graceful" about pronounced under eye bags or a face that looks like it's flowing down in rivers.
Note that women who have "aged gracefully" have also preserved (somehow, due to genetics or very discreet and well performed interventions) a pretty "put together" face.
Unfortunately, I think that people who have experienced significant weight fluctuations in their life need some "help" in the "aging gracefully" department.
For the record, my mom is approaching 50 and people mistake her for my sister (I'm turning 28 soon). She has aged gracefully, I'd say
Grandma doesn't look her age, either, so I suppose this is genetics for the most part.
Without seeing how you look...I would say it would be worth maintaining your current weight and seeing if any of the skin perks up? I know they say it can take a year or two for skin to firm back up if it's going to and I'm assuming that's true for skin all over.
And as someone else mentioned - recomposition/bulking & cutting would be worth looking into as well. If you build up muscle and then lose the fat, you'll get that slimmer look you want eventually.
~Lyssa0 -
Maybe you should stop hanging on to something someone said when you were 28 and go run or lift something heavy...The endorphins are awesome and makes you feel 30 years younger, despite being red faced and sweaty!
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you could use retin-a for fine wrinkles and texture, and *always* wear sunscreen, but for the issues you mention it's pretty much down to fillers and surgery.
i read somewhere that staying at around 21-22% body fat (sorry can't remember where) is a happy medium re face/butt balance for a lot of women.0 -
crazyjerseygirl wrote: »So a few notes
1: every pic in there had smiling well lit plump person vs. Harshly lit scowling slim person.
2: loosing weight takes time, what are the differences in years between those photos.
How long have you been overweight? Are you sure this isn't how you would have looked slim if you had never gained?
Agreed. The facial expressions are so different and the pics chosen may have been deliberate.
I have seen ppl who lost tons of weight drastically and yes they look aged and haggard but then there are those who lose weight the correct way ...a bit more slowly and they actually look more youthful.
I believe in aging gracefully. Of course I use my facial products - chemical peels, sunblock, vit C and A and it helps. Fine tune your skin regimen ..hydrate and eat those healthy fats within moderation.
I don't think you have to choose one over the other.
you're young, aren't you? ;p0 -
mamapeach910 wrote: »LOL, I'd try some less-drastic things first. Invest in some really good cleansers and face creams. Try oil washing. Get a GOOD makeup tutorial. Then, if you still aren't happy, consider injectables like Botox or fillers, or perhaps some peels.
I'd put the knife as a LAST RESORT.
Seconding the advice to try oil washing! It's da bomb!
A lot of what's going to happen is genetic. Sorry.
I am lucky. I'm 52 and really don't have any wrinkles. There is the very faintest hint of crepe under my eyes. You have to be right up in my face to see it.
To date, I've lost 31 pounds. With that loss, I can see where I've lost collagen, though. There will be creasing. There will be some sagging.
Oh well. I also have autoimmune arthritis and degenerative disc disease. My ultimate goal is to lose a total of 90 pounds. 1/3 of the way there. I'll take a face with a few creases and less load on my joints for the next however many years I have left.
Everything's a trade-off.
My health matters. My face doesn't.
Big picture, here.
At 42, I don't have any wrinkles either - but then again, I'd better.
My problem is not wrinkles - it is an overall slightly "withery", "sharper" look that comes with weight loss after a certain age. It's almost like you are very slowly starting to "prune up".
I am not remotely there yet - but you can almost see a very faint start of this process and this is just disturbing to me.
When you are plumper, the fat in the face prevents those natural changes (collagen break down) from being too visible. I know this from my mom.
Fat but nice and plumpy in the face. :-)
Also with diabetis. :-(
For thin persons, plastic surgeons apparently address this problem with fillers and lasers.
But yes - health wise you are right. Prunier but healthier and hopefully with longer life expectancy:-)
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wisdomfromyou wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »So you're saying ...run, don't walk, to the plastic surgeon's office, correct?
Only if you can't handle aging gracefully*.
*which - SCREW THAT lol
Doesn't look like it.
Note how the advice to consider "aging gracefully" usually comes from the 40 yo-s and below.
In today's society "aging gracefully" is almost a joke.
As someone said somewhere on the net, there's nothing "graceful" about pronounced under eye bags or a face that looks like it's flowing down in rivers.
Note that women who have "aged gracefully" have also preserved (somehow, due to genetics or very discreet and well performed interventions) a pretty "put together" face.
Unfortunately, I think that people who have experienced significant weight fluctuations in their life need some "help" in the "aging gracefully" department.
No.
This is coming from someone older than you.
Aging gracefully means accepting what comes your way and changing what you can. Do recomp. Be a basa$$.
It doesn't mean looking like a cover model when you're 70.
So here's my advice... AGE GRACEFULLY.
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The wrinkles there there whether you have them stretched out over a layer of fat or not. IMO, better to see them at 40 and watch them gradually increase over time, than wait til you're 60+ and go from smooth, chubby babyface to grand canyon overnight any time you get sick for a week.0
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wisdomfromyou wrote: »LOL, I'd try some less-drastic things first. Invest in some really good cleansers and face creams. Try oil washing. Get a GOOD makeup tutorial. Then, if you still aren't happy, consider injectables like Botox or fillers, or perhaps some peels.
I'd put the knife as a LAST RESORT.
You're kidding me. I have them - I am already using really good stuff, some prescribed by dermatologist. On the surface, where skincare products can act, my skin is in perfect condition.
I read that the kind of things that bother me will NOT be solved by any cream no matter how "miraculous".
You can't solve volume loss, or sunken under-eye area, or bags/puffiness with those kind of things.
These things are all part of growing older...why are you afraid of that?
Because they suck and the bottom line is they make me look way less pretty than I was before, when I was fatter. :-(0 -
crazyjerseygirl wrote: »So a few notes
1: every pic in there had smiling well lit plump person vs. Harshly lit scowling slim person.
2: loosing weight takes time, what are the differences in years between those photos.
How long have you been overweight? Are you sure this isn't how you would have looked slim if you had never gained?
Agreed. The facial expressions are so different and the pics chosen may have been deliberate.
I have seen ppl who lost tons of weight drastically and yes they look aged and haggard but then there are those who lose weight the correct way ...a bit more slowly and they actually look more youthful.
I believe in aging gracefully. Of course I use my facial products - chemical peels, sunblock, vit C and A and it helps. Fine tune your skin regimen ..hydrate and eat those healthy fats within moderation.
I don't think you have to choose one over the other.
you're young, aren't you? ;p
Heck yeah. :-)0 -
wisdomfromyou wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »So you're saying ...run, don't walk, to the plastic surgeon's office, correct?
Only if you can't handle aging gracefully*.
*which - SCREW THAT lol
Doesn't look like it.
Note how the advice to consider "aging gracefully" usually comes from the 40 yo-s and below.
In today's society "aging gracefully" is almost a joke.
As someone said somewhere on the net, there's nothing "graceful" about pronounced under eye bags or a face that looks like it's flowing down in rivers.
Note that women who have "aged gracefully" have also preserved (somehow, due to genetics or very discreet and well performed interventions) a pretty "put together" face.
Unfortunately, I think that people who have experienced significant weight fluctuations in their life need some "help" in the "aging gracefully" department.
i agree with you.
the other option (if you're not genetically blessed) is to not care. but nothing wrong with caring, either.0 -
wisdomfromyou wrote: »herrspoons wrote: »Choice?
I... I don't understand.
Well...it turns out that after 40, when you lose weight, this also shows in your face and NOT in a good way. It ages you.
This depends on genetics, where you hold your weight and how well you have taken care of your skin your whole life.
I'm about your age and don't have the same issue that you do. On the other hand, I notice profile pictures here of people in their 30s and even 20s who are aging VERY poorly, so YMMV. I tend to think that maybe you should be thinking this through with your therapist before you go to a plastic surgeon. Unless you have a job where looks are important (actress, model) there isn't necessarily anything wrong with looking your age.
Oil cleansing really is a good technique. You can google it for instructions. You don't have to use a blend of special oils--plain olive oils works very well.0 -
mamapeach910 wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »So you're saying ...run, don't walk, to the plastic surgeon's office, correct?
Only if you can't handle aging gracefully*.
*which - SCREW THAT lol
Doesn't look like it.
Note how the advice to consider "aging gracefully" usually comes from the 40 yo-s and below.
In today's society "aging gracefully" is almost a joke.
As someone said somewhere on the net, there's nothing "graceful" about pronounced under eye bags or a face that looks like it's flowing down in rivers.
Note that women who have "aged gracefully" have also preserved (somehow, due to genetics or very discreet and well performed interventions) a pretty "put together" face.
Unfortunately, I think that people who have experienced significant weight fluctuations in their life need some "help" in the "aging gracefully" department.
No.
This is coming from someone older than you.
Aging gracefully means accepting what comes your way and changing what you can. Do recomp. Be a basa$$.
It doesn't mean looking like a cover model when you're 70.
So here's my advice... AGE GRACEFULLY.
I don't think that's necessarily true. It can be hard to reconcile feeling young with looking old. I think aging gracefully means staying true to who you are and going after what you want, whether that's heavy lifting or face lifting.0 -
macgurlnet wrote: »
Without seeing how you look...I would say it would be worth maintaining your current weight and seeing if any of the skin perks up? I know they say it can take a year or two for skin to firm back up if it's going to and I'm assuming that's true for skin all over.
And as someone else mentioned - recomposition/bulking & cutting would be worth looking into as well. If you build up muscle and then lose the fat, you'll get that slimmer look you want eventually.
~Lyssa
Interesting...the skin can "firm back up"? Never heard of that.
As for recomposition/bulking etc ...this might work for the body but not for the face.
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Personally I'm 52 and I wouldn't say that being slim makes you look older but I would avoid being too overweight or underweight. Who really wants to be middle aged thinspo? I think what you want to avoid is the whole "social x-ray" look which Tom Wolfe coined in Bonfire of the Vanities to describe middle age very thin socialites. If you were a size 2 or 4 when you were younger you may find a size 6 or 8 is better at 40 or 50 but there is no need to be overweight in order to save you face. Unless, of course, you covet the "double chin" look
. As others have said, facials, cleansing oils etc. are great. 0 -
I have had the opposite happen. I now look much younger since I have lost weight, and I'm about your age (44) I have had several people comment on this. However, I started at obese and am currently a BMI of about 24, so near the high end of the healthy weight range. So I still have adequate fat reserves to keep my face looking good. But I do plan to lose a little more, and I am certain there is a point which would be too low and cause some of the issues you are talking about. That would be a sign to me that I should stop losing.
I love that quote, btw. I first saw it when I read that Catherine Deneuve once said that at a certain age you need to choose between your face and your *kitten*!
If you try to get "too" thin...or stay very thin...the natural wrinkles that we ALL get as we age will be more apparent. Losing weight does not cause this...it just reveals more of what is already there. Just losing weight should not make you look older...unless you are trying to get too low. I think the only possibility of this happening for me is if I want to lose some stubborn pocket of fat somewhere after I am already at the "right" weight... one that is healthy, I feel good at, and look very good even if not perfect at. In that case, trying to get rid of some tiny amount of thigh or upper arm fat could come at a cost that I wouldn't be willing to pay.
I have no idea what you weigh, but if you want to lose more because you think it would improve health then you should. However, if you feel you are at a healthy weight and just don't like a specific problem area...perhaps a better strategy would be to maintain and focus more effort with weight training on the one or two things you don't like.
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mamapeach910 wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »wisdomfromyou wrote: »So you're saying ...run, don't walk, to the plastic surgeon's office, correct?
Only if you can't handle aging gracefully*.
*which - SCREW THAT lol
Doesn't look like it.
Note how the advice to consider "aging gracefully" usually comes from the 40 yo-s and below.
In today's society "aging gracefully" is almost a joke.
As someone said somewhere on the net, there's nothing "graceful" about pronounced under eye bags or a face that looks like it's flowing down in rivers.
Note that women who have "aged gracefully" have also preserved (somehow, due to genetics or very discreet and well performed interventions) a pretty "put together" face.
Unfortunately, I think that people who have experienced significant weight fluctuations in their life need some "help" in the "aging gracefully" department.
No.
This is coming from someone older than you.
Aging gracefully means accepting what comes your way and changing what you can. Do recomp. Be a basa$$.
It doesn't mean looking like a cover model when you're 70.
So here's my advice... AGE GRACEFULLY.
I don't think that's necessarily true. It can be hard to reconcile feeling young with looking old. I think aging gracefully means staying true to who you are and going after what you want, whether that's heavy lifting or face lifting.
seriously. "natural" =/= "better". and screw being "graceful". there's enough policing of women's experience to get on us for wanting to look good, too.
there is a ton of judgement waiting for women once they hit a certain age. truth is, looking young/old can make a difference in terms of actual life options (re age discrimination etc). i'm not going to judge anyone who wants to do whatever they want to do.0 -
Maybe you should stop hanging on to something someone said when you were 28 and go run or lift something heavy...The endorphins are awesome and makes you feel 30 years younger, despite being red faced and sweaty!
I HAVE been running and will actually stop doing it so often because it DOES affect the face in a negative way.
I AM doing weights.
Feeling young is one thing, looking it is another.
Let me know how it goes when you feel awesome and energized one day, after plenty of sleep, water and everything nutritiously religious, and then you meet someone who tells you" are you OK? you look kind of tired".
So I don't think so.
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