The joys of office broscience - misguided food/nutrition advice

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Replies

  • Zx14chick
    Zx14chick Posts: 255 Member
    I am nearly in tears with the stupidity and I'm just on the first page! I don't know if I can go on!
  • JordisTSM
    JordisTSM Posts: 359 Member
    So much bro-science in our office. In the last week I've heard:-
    * not eating carbs after midday (two doing this one)
    * Garcinia Cambogia..... enough said
    * Detoxing... oy
    * Gluten-free...for weight loss

    Plus multiple instances of people who "just can't lose weight". While stuffing their faces at morning coffee shouts.

    Funnily enough the sportspeople in the office say nothing and just keep doing what they're doing.
  • DirrtyH
    DirrtyH Posts: 664 Member
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    amwoidyla wrote: »
    One of my co-workers asked me if I foamed rolled and I said that I did. He began telling me that foam rolling made your muscles longer. I may have had a semi-angry outburst about it.

    Could you please go back and ask him how they fit after they get longer? Do they coil up like a snake, or do they hang down like Christmas garland?

    I think you actually get taller.
  • JPW1990
    JPW1990 Posts: 2,424 Member
    DirrtyH wrote: »
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    amwoidyla wrote: »
    One of my co-workers asked me if I foamed rolled and I said that I did. He began telling me that foam rolling made your muscles longer. I may have had a semi-angry outburst about it.

    Could you please go back and ask him how they fit after they get longer? Do they coil up like a snake, or do they hang down like Christmas garland?

    I think you actually get taller.

    Dammit. My foam roller is being delivered this week, and I already have a hard time finding tall jeans.
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  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
    sofaking6 wrote: »
    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Oh, how had I never looked into the blood type diet. It's like the next best thing to a zodiac diet (up for this, btw).

    [quotes]

    So hilarious.

    I'm a Virgo - it would be like, "Is your steak perfectly medium-rare? If not, throw it away and try again. Repeat until all food is perfect, only then may you eat".
    It matters if you are an earth, fire or water sign and what elements you are low in. ;)

    I'm a sagittarius so I only eat what I hunt and kill with my own teeth and also I can only drink wine.

    What about people like me who are born on a cusp? Does that mean I can use both Scorpio and Sag diets as I see fit?
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
    edited April 2015
    I just did a little sloothing to see if I could find the "blood type diet" how it would relate to me. Type A's they say to become vegetarian. Seriously. No. Other than making me miserable, what on earth would that solve?

    As a fellow type A, I disapprove as well.
  • schelly81
    schelly81 Posts: 161 Member
    edited April 2015
    One of my co-workers is a crash dieter. When he's on his diet he eats 1100 calories a day and does 40 minutes of cardio daily. He told me that he realized to be a normal weight he would have to do this every day for the rest of his life. His sister, who I also work with, lectures me on eating after dinner. Any carbs I eat after dinner will turn RIGHT TO FAT (wide eyes for emphasis). They like to tell me I won't keep losing weight if I continue to eat as I have been. I just smile and nod.
  • belgerian
    belgerian Posts: 1,059 Member
    edited April 2015
    I almost want to stay late at work to read all these, but got a family to go home to so bumping for a good laugh first thing in the morning.

    I did have some one tell me banannas will make me fat, I looked at him and said you know what will make you fat, he gave me a funny look, and then I said when you eat more calories than you burn throughout the day. He walked away.
  • LearnFromTheRed
    LearnFromTheRed Posts: 294 Member
    Maybe this could be of some assistance?

    how-to-even-for-dummies.jpg

    Thank you, that REALLY made me laugh!

  • bootsiejayne
    bootsiejayne Posts: 151 Member
    My co-worker is going to "bulk up" by eating lots of protein, but he doesn't think he needs to work out. The protein will just build the muscle for him.
  • KatieJane83
    KatieJane83 Posts: 2,002 Member
    Maybe this could be of some assistance?

    how-to-even-for-dummies.jpg

    Thank you, that REALLY made me laugh!

    haha, glad I could make you laugh
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  • belgerian
    belgerian Posts: 1,059 Member
    CandiceMcD wrote: »
    HA, I just looked up the military diet & I am confused as to how hot dogs and saltines are supposed to help you get healthier. I mean, I have had MREs that have been more nutritionally balanced. Not to mention, I gained like 20 lbs the first year I was in the military because of my love for the chow hall and daily grilled ham and cheese sandwiches.

    On the military Diet (I should say lifestyle) I lost about 60lbs in 8 weeks. That is a fact Jack. Of course I am sure it had nothing to do with the physically intense lifestyle change.

  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
    arditarose wrote: »
    Can someone explain to me the weird "don't eat past 9pm" thing? I've heard that a few times and I'm feeling search engine lazy right now.

    I had a pretty drunken/intense discussion with my friend about this, and she went home and emailed me these studies at like 3 am. I didn't get too into them, but you might find something fun in there.

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25707276
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25711020
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25665169
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25707277

    Were these people high when they did these studies?



    Probably - including with the munchies.
  • KatieJane83
    KatieJane83 Posts: 2,002 Member
    My co-worker is going to "bulk up" by eating lots of protein, but he doesn't think he needs to work out. The protein will just build the muscle for him.

    v8ccqht.jpg


  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
    My co-worker is going to "bulk up" by eating lots of protein, but he doesn't think he needs to work out. The protein will just build the muscle for him.

    A friend of my brother ended up at the doctors because he was eating nothing but meat and had some serious digestive issues. (he was working out though)
  • KatieJane83
    KatieJane83 Posts: 2,002 Member
    belgerian wrote: »
    CandiceMcD wrote: »
    HA, I just looked up the military diet & I am confused as to how hot dogs and saltines are supposed to help you get healthier. I mean, I have had MREs that have been more nutritionally balanced. Not to mention, I gained like 20 lbs the first year I was in the military because of my love for the chow hall and daily grilled ham and cheese sandwiches.

    On the military Diet (I should say lifestyle) I lost about 60lbs in 8 weeks. That is a fact Jack. Of course I am sure it had nothing to do with the physically intense lifestyle change.

    The person that mentioned it originally was not referring to an actual military diet and lifestyle. They meant this: themilitarydiet.com/military-diet-plan/

    just another gimmick
  • bootsiejayne
    bootsiejayne Posts: 151 Member
    edited April 2015
    MamaRiss wrote: »
    Here, I made an astrology dietary restrictions for y'all:

    Aries: Can only eat food they've won in a street fight.
    Taurus: Can only eat animal proteins from animals that do not exceed 35mph at full speed.
    Gemini: Can only eat food scavenged from self-help group craft tables.
    Cancer: Can only eat food from neglected cans and boxes in the back of the very top shelf in the kitchen.
    Leo: Can only eat foods that can be arranged into a self-portrait.
    Virgo: Can only eat foods that can slide easily through the chute under the door.
    Libra: Can only eat foods that compliment their accessories.
    Scorpio: Can only eat foods that can hold their own in a staring match.
    Sagittarius: Can only eat foods from countries they cannot pronounce.
    Capricorn: Can only eat foods that their employer agrees to write off as a tax deduction.
    Aquarius: Can only eat foods that make it through their teleportation device without fusing to a nasty housefly.
    Pisces: Can only eat foods that remind them of that time their mother forgot to pick them up from soccer practice.

    Do you know how hard it will be to feed two Tauruses, a Gemini, and a Cancer? The Gemini and Cancer being picky little children.

    Love. I'm starting this today. Aries. I'm going to look like Tyler Durden pretty soon.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    JordisTSM wrote: »
    So much bro-science in our office. In the last week I've heard:-
    * not eating carbs after midday (two doing this one)
    * Garcinia Cambogia..... enough said
    * Detoxing... oy
    * Gluten-free...for weight loss

    Plus multiple instances of people who "just can't lose weight". While stuffing their faces at morning coffee shouts.

    Funnily enough the sportspeople in the office say nothing and just keep doing what they're doing.

    but. but .... how do you prepare for the gym after work if you do no carbs after midday?
  • schelly81
    schelly81 Posts: 161 Member
    MamaRiss wrote: »
    Here, I made an astrology dietary restrictions for y'all:

    Aries: Can only eat food they've won in a street fight.
    Taurus: Can only eat animal proteins from animals that do not exceed 35mph at full speed.
    Gemini: Can only eat food scavenged from self-help group craft tables.
    Cancer: Can only eat food from neglected cans and boxes in the back of the very top shelf in the kitchen.
    Leo: Can only eat foods that can be arranged into a self-portrait.
    Virgo: Can only eat foods that can slide easily through the chute under the door.
    Libra: Can only eat foods that compliment their accessories.
    Scorpio: Can only eat foods that can hold their own in a staring match.
    Sagittarius: Can only eat foods from countries they cannot pronounce.
    Capricorn: Can only eat foods that their employer agrees to write off as a tax deduction.
    Aquarius: Can only eat foods that make it through their teleportation device without fusing to a nasty housefly.
    Pisces: Can only eat foods that remind them of that time their mother forgot to pick them up from soccer practice.

    Do you know how hard it will be to feed two Tauruses, a Gemini, and a Cancer? The Gemini and Cancer being picky little children.

    Love. I'm starting this today. Aries. I'm going to look like Tyler Durden pretty soon.

    I'm also an Aries. My kids are a Leo and a Cancer so I'll just fight them for their food. They're little but they do outnumber me, and they're feisty.
  • cnadiger
    cnadiger Posts: 168 Member
    Pisces diet: Fish, water, and magic.

    I'm a taurus. I'm pretty sure that means I can eat all the yummy, yummy steak, but no veggies.
  • ElvenToad
    ElvenToad Posts: 644 Member
    My co-worker is going to "bulk up" by eating lots of protein, but he doesn't think he needs to work out. The protein will just build the muscle for him.

    haha my husband told me he saw his boss drinking one of those muscle milk drinks and asked him if he liked it. He said "yeah it has so much protein in it, I need it to help me get my 8,000 grams of protein per day so I can bulk up".

    Exact quote.

    He is a very thin man, so my husband asked him if he started lifting? No, he doesn't have time to workout.

    8,000 grams of protein? We've been laughing about it for weeks.

  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    My co-worker is going to "bulk up" by eating lots of protein, but he doesn't think he needs to work out. The protein will just build the muscle for him.

    haha my husband told me he saw his boss drinking one of those muscle milk drinks and asked him if he liked it. He said "yeah it has so much protein in it, I need it to help me get my 8,000 grams of protein per day so I can bulk up".

    Exact quote.

    He is a very thin man, so my husband asked him if he started lifting? No, he doesn't have time to workout.

    8,000 grams of protein? We've been laughing about it for weeks.

    And I thought 100 grams was a lot. :noway:
  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,578 Member
    JoRocka wrote: »
    JordisTSM wrote: »
    So much bro-science in our office. In the last week I've heard:-
    * not eating carbs after midday (two doing this one)
    * Garcinia Cambogia..... enough said
    * Detoxing... oy
    * Gluten-free...for weight loss

    Plus multiple instances of people who "just can't lose weight". While stuffing their faces at morning coffee shouts.

    Funnily enough the sportspeople in the office say nothing and just keep doing what they're doing.

    but. but .... how do you prepare for the gym after work if you do no carbs after midday?

    You can only go to the gym in the morning, duh

  • karen_fitzgibbon
    karen_fitzgibbon Posts: 736 Member
    I work in a highneeds aged care facility. We feed the residents according to their diet need etc. You would think that the staff here know better. Pfft... While in the staff room the other day I heard one girl talking about the 2468 diet (totally unsustainable for her or anyone actually) a male carer telling us that "all women are fat because we're full of blood, that's why we have our period of course - to balance it out " i actually spat out my coffee at that one.
    I told them I'm having great results with the ELMM diet... Heeheehee
  • karen_fitzgibbon
    karen_fitzgibbon Posts: 736 Member
    Oh and I forgot one!!! The nurse that "is so overweight because she drinks too much water" bahahahahaha obviously the packet of biscuits and three cans of coke she had through the day didn't count
  • cnadiger
    cnadiger Posts: 168 Member
    CandiceMcD wrote: »
    HA, I just looked up the military diet & I am confused as to how hot dogs and saltines are supposed to help you get healthier. I mean, I have had MREs that have been more nutritionally balanced. Not to mention, I gained like 20 lbs the first year I was in the military because of my love for the chow hall and daily grilled ham and cheese sandwiches.

    Same here, I don't know anyone who lost weight the first couple of years in the military - unless they were already overweight and put on restrictions. :D
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    edited April 2015
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    I just did a little sloothing to see if I could find the "blood type diet" how it would relate to me. Type A's they say to become vegetarian. Seriously. No. Other than making me miserable, what on earth would that solve?

    As a fellow type A, I disapprove as well.

    Oh, whine, whine. As a Type B I'm apparently supposed to eat goat, drink kumis, and get all my exercise by riding 18 hours a day on the steppes. ;-) (This may also be what I'm supposed to do as a Sagittarius.)

    Apparently Type Bs are basically Dothraki, for any Game of Thrones fans among us.
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    I just did a little sloothing to see if I could find the "blood type diet" how it would relate to me. Type A's they say to become vegetarian. Seriously. No. Other than making me miserable, what on earth would that solve?

    As a fellow type A, I disapprove as well.

    Oh, whine, whine. As a Type B I'm apparently supposed to eat goat, drink kumis, and get all my exercise by riding 18 hours a day on the steppes. ;-) (This may also be what I'm supposed to do as a Sagittarius.)

    Apparently Type Bs are basically Dothraki, for any Game of Thrones fans among us.

    At least you get meat lol.

    Being a type B sounds way cooler.

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