Craziest food pusher story?
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I have an amazing fire fighting hero uncle who started a home wine business in his backyard. He pushed and pushed to get me to try some (I love small batch brew wines and beers so it was normal). He went so far as to break out the guilt trip of "You'll have a drink with other uncle, but not me?" And that's how he ended up being the third person to find out I was pregnant.3
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Marilyn0924 wrote: »
I WAS JUST GOING TO POST THIS! YESSSS!0 -
WigglexWigglexWiggle wrote: »Marilyn0924 wrote: »
I WAS JUST GOING TO POST THIS! YESSSS!
Lol.
What I hate hearing the most 'oh no I'm not going to get dessert, I'll just get a bite of yours'.
NO.1 -
WigglexWigglexWiggle wrote: »Marilyn0924 wrote: »
I WAS JUST GOING TO POST THIS! YESSSS!
Lol.
What I hate hearing the most 'oh no I'm not going to get dessert, I'll just get a bite of yours'.
NO.
Hahaha. This is just like my husband. Whenever he orders dessert and the server brings an extra spoon for me, hubs will always hand the spare spoon straight back.
To be honest, I don't really like dessert anyway, and would much rather eat a plate of cheese.0 -
samwiserabbit wrote: »(snip)
In some cultures a guest is sort of expected to say no two or three times before finally "giving in" even if they want the thing from the beginning.
(snip)
Yes, literally. My paternal grandmother was from exactly such a subculture. The expected "proper" social pattern was that the host would offer, and the guest was supposed (required!) to refuse politely twice, then could accept on the third offer. It was that specific.
She told a story of a mean-spirited woman who would offer something particularly tempting - at a time when my grandmother was quite poor, didn't get many treats - but only offer twice.
And there are many more cultural traditions where the offering & sharing of food/hospitality in social situations has a ritual aspect to it.
Perhaps one can tell more, at the time, whether this kind of thing is in play, I don't know. But I would think fuller explanation could help apply social oil when it is the case, uncomfortable though that may be. No obligation to eat food one doesn't want, IMO, though - unless one is the visitor abroad in such a culture, maybe.0 -
pebble4321 wrote: »I agree with this. If someone is having a conversation and then stops to say, "oh nevermind, you're too pretty to understand" are they really insulting you? Do you feel awful that they just called you pretty?
Hell yes, that's an insult. They just called you stupid!
I guess I meant more like someone complaining, and then saying "you're too pretty to sympathize" I didn't mean not understand like they weren't intelligent. Obviously calling someone pretty and stupid...is just calling someone stupid, and is mean.0 -
Okay, in my immediate family circle (read: husband/siblings/cousin) we only steal food if we love you. And it becomes a great game to try and keep our food away from others.
There have been kitchen wars started over bacon. You think I'm joking? Took me three weeks to get all the grease off the bay window. . .
This being said, I would never steal food off of the plate of anyone not in this immediate circle.2 -
I had the stomach flu one time and my roommate kept trying to bring me slices of turkey deli meat. As I was currently throwing up. All I could manage was a look of "but whyyyy?"0
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Friend of mine in graduate school. She was determined to get me to drink beer at a student gathering. I put up with about 30 min of intermittent, "Do you want some? You can have some of mine. Are you sure you don't want a sip? Here, just taste it. Don't be that way, just drink it! Come on, don't be such a stick in the mud ... " And on, and on, and on.
I kept saying "No, thanks". That eventually changed to "No". Then, "I said no. If I want some, I'll ask." Eventually I tried silence.
The last time she asked me, I lost it and told her that if she *kitten* asked me to take a *kitten* drink one more *kitten* time, I was going to ram the bottle up her *kitten*.
I really don't curse much. "S***" is about the worst thing I say. She was shocked, offended, hurt (also a drama queen), and didn't speak to me for days. And you know what? It was such a relief not to be nagged, I didn't really care.
I don't recommend doing the same. I wouldn't have normally, I'd have walked away (which would have gotten the same reaction from her). But, it was a really stressful time in my life and I was not managing it well. So, she caught the brunt of it.4 -
I'm actually very guilty of being a food pusher. I try to be mindful and listen the first time they decline, but if it's someone I really care about I may list off several options of things I could make for them. It drives my partner crazy sometimes so I try really hard to catch myself. Food is love, and I just want everyone to be happy and well fed.0
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This may not be the same, but when I was around 6, my cousin had me pinned to the ground while he was shoving his wifes food into my mouth...and threatened to hurt me if I didn't eat her crap.0
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Friend of mine in graduate school. She was determined to get me to drink beer at a student gathering. I put up with about 30 min of intermittent, "Do you want some? You can have some of mine. Are you sure you don't want a sip? Here, just taste it. Don't be that way, just drink it! Come on, don't be such a stick in the mud ... " And on, and on, and on.
I kept saying "No, thanks". That eventually changed to "No". Then, "I said no. If I want some, I'll ask." Eventually I tried silence.
The last time she asked me, I lost it and told her that if she *kitten* asked me to take a *kitten* drink one more *kitten* time, I was going to ram the bottle up her *kitten*.
I really don't curse much. "S***" is about the worst thing I say. She was shocked, offended, hurt (also a drama queen), and didn't speak to me for days. And you know what? It was such a relief not to be nagged, I didn't really care.
I don't recommend doing the same. I wouldn't have normally, I'd have walked away (which would have gotten the same reaction from her). But, it was a really stressful time in my life and I was not managing it well. So, she caught the brunt of it.
Yup! That's what I would do...
I got a lot of satisfaction just reading what you told her, LOL!1 -
saragreen012 wrote: »I'm actually very guilty of being a food pusher. I try to be mindful and listen the first time they decline, but if it's someone I really care about I may list off several options of things I could make for them. It drives my partner crazy sometimes so I try really hard to catch myself. Food is love, and I just want everyone to be happy and well fed.
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DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit!
Hahaha this very thing happened to me the other weekend. I was preparing my lunch consisting of goat cheese, crackers, salad, shrimp and cocktail sauce. Meticulously weighed everything. Sat down, and just as I was about to dig in, the boyfriend waltzes in without warning and scoops up a bunch of my shrimp!! Like, oh hey, no big deal, it's not like that was MINE or anything!!1 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
And that would be fine w/me.
Because the way I see it... If you're allowed to "Skinny Shame" me, I'm allowed to "Fat Shame" you... no double-standards where I come from!
You're "allowed to do the same", or you don't want to sink to the other person's level?
I wouldn't be rude back, just because I don't want to be like that person (tearing others down). In fact, the best way to get to them is by being super nice.
but that's just me.2 -
Sometimes when I visit my parents, my dad will literally go through the entire contents of their fridge and pantry listing for me all the food they have and telling me I am welcome to eat any of it. But it doesn't bother me because I know he's doing it because he loves me and is happy I'm there. If I walked in the door and he didn't offer to make me something to eat, I would feel very let down0
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quinndeborde wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
And that would be fine w/me.
Because the way I see it... If you're allowed to "Skinny Shame" me, I'm allowed to "Fat Shame" you... no double-standards where I come from!
You're "allowed to do the same", or you don't want to sink to the other person's level?
I feel like I'm allowed... but society doesn't..
You call someone "fat" it's like you committed murder!
Call someone "too skinny" and it's acceptable... I think it sucks but that's the way it is!0 -
You haven't seen food pushers until you've visited this one town here where people are very well known for their hospitality. And they go to extremes to uphold this reputation.
Anyway.. we went to visit some relatives there once and it was my first time visiting. I was offered sponge cake. I don't like sponge cake so I said no. Of course, a plate was put in front of me anyway, then they host kept pressuring me to eat it. When I didn't, she cut a piece, and practically shoved the fork in my face saying "come on, don't be shy, have some". It was shocking...0 -
The thing is, it gets embarrassing when people try to force food on you when you don't want it.
When I was a student midwife, we saw an Asian family (unsure of exact nationality, but it's irrelevant anyway) at their home. It was clearly customary to offer food and drink to visitors, regardless of capacity (family/professional/etc). The midwife I was with took some of these offerings but I refused (as I would anywhere - I didn't know what was in it or how it had been prepared so I prefer not to accept - I like to know what I'm eating/drinking).
The new father was very, very pushy and kept on and on about it. I just kept refusing, much to his annoyance. The visit eventually ended (the new father was STILL trying to get me to take the food) and after we'd left the midwife mentoring me had a right go as she perceived that I'd been really rude! Well, I'm sorry but if I don't want to eat the food offered then that's my decision and the people concerned should accept and respect that. Respect is a two way street; I'm an adult, capable of deciding things for myself and if that means offending someone who doesn't respect my choices then so be it.1 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »quinndeborde wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
And that would be fine w/me.
Because the way I see it... If you're allowed to "Skinny Shame" me, I'm allowed to "Fat Shame" you... no double-standards where I come from!
You're "allowed to do the same", or you don't want to sink to the other person's level?
I feel like I'm allowed... but society doesn't..
You call someone "fat" it's like you committed murder!
Call someone "too skinny" and it's acceptable... I think it sucks but that's the way it is!
Call someone "ugly" versus "too pretty".
Call someone "stupid" versus "too smart."
Call someone "awkward" versus "too charming."
Skinny is seen as a positive in our society. That's why calling someone skinny is acceptable and calling someone fat is seen as negative/insulting (even if true, yes).1
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