WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR APRIL 2016

Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .

Good Afternoon Ladies,

Abru161, welcome. Please tell us a bit about yourself to help us get to know you. We also ask that you sign each post with the name you want to be called and a location, general or specific.

Sylvia, glad to hear from you and really glad to hear things are going well. The turnip plants are beautiful!!! Who knew?

Allie, what a nice surprise from your girlfriend!

Heather, so glad you've made plans to visit your son. I wish you could visit each of us, also.

Rori, congrats on needing a new tankini top. Keep up the great work. And good for you on getting to the gym.

Cheri, I really hope your DH gets a great job very soon. We've been there;done that so I know how frustrating it can get.

Larisa, sorry there were no sparks. Just say, "Next"

Chris, so happy for you and "soon to be" BF. Glad the day trip was a total success.

Anne, glad you are trying to stay busy and stay in a better place. We don't care that you respond to anyone specific on here, just do what you can for you.

Margaret, I haven't responded much about your book because I don't have any anger that I can think of. The main thing is that it is meaningful and hopeful helpful to you. It was still interesting hearing about it.

Pip, I get the feeling that Kirby loves you. How sweet!!!

Chris, so sorry about your Mom and her current condition. It is good that you and the one sister have somewhat mended fences.

The Changling, welcome. And be careful talking about “Oldtimers”, ya young whippersnapper. We are happy to have you and support you in your journey. Please sign each post with the name you want to be called and a location, general or specific.

Heather, sorry to hear Bea has the sniffles. Congrats on twisting DH’s arm about the guided tour in Mexico.

to any Newbies that I missed. Come often and join in the chat. This thing works!! Please sign your post with what you want to be called. It makes it easier for us to respond to you. Also a location is great, be it specific or general. We are happy to have you join us.

Yeah for me. I’m caught up for the first time in weeks. I love hearing what’s going on with all of you so please keep sharing. It has been very cool here but supposed to get over 70 today. Tomorrow might even be a beach day, who knows. I have Women of the Moose tonight so need to get off this computer and get on with my day.I hope all of you have a healthy and happy day. ]

Words I live by:
Savor. I have to slow down and savor every bite.
and
Opportunity. Each day offers new opportunities for good health and happiness if we just look for them and choose them.
I Love you,
DJ
Myrtle Beach, SC

margaretturk wrote: »

Chris prayers for your family.

Changling welcome great group here!

nb1959 wrote: »

I wonder if my experience can help anyone out. I was abused as a child from about age 5 to age 15, using legal definitions of these terms. At 57, I am in a peace-filled place. Here is what I have learned about toxic people and situations. Avoid labeling them. Simply say, "This is where they are in their life, and this is where I am." Observe the situation and do not judge anyone. After making your observation about them and the current situation, love yourself by making the best decision you can make about how much you will choose to interact with them. Then (and this is the key), take action by loving let go. Say (to yourself), "Sister, Father, Mother, Friend, Relative, I wish you peace and love but I choose not to be a part of your life right now." No big drama, no big announcement. Someday, they may change, you may change, the situation might change, but for right now, lovingly let go of what or who is causing you pain. I lost Mama to Alzheimer's not long ago (not my biomom, my mom in law who loved me.) This is how I did it. I lovingly let her go, and the aching loss subsided. It is how I am letting go of my sister, who was raised in the same house with me, and knew what was happening to me. I have to let her go right now, because it is what is best for both of us right now. No big announcement, no drama, just a subtle change in my approach. Perhaps some day, something will change and a relationship can develop. But I stay in the here-and-now with my loving family and friends and a deep abiding faith that brings me such joy and peace. I sure hope this brings comfort to those who are sick, sad, lonely, angry...the real toxin is not people. The real toxin is negative thoughts and feelings, and I know...I lived in all of the emotions you associate with abuse for a very long time. Three years of equine therapy have made all of the difference in the world, and I am at peace.

Wise observations. Thank you so much so sharing. I do find myself saying something similar about my brother. When I think of him I wish him peace. I love the this is "where they are this is where they are I am where I am. Right now we will go our separate ways." If it is meant to be we will reconnect . Like the pray God be with you til we meet again. My niece was having a bad day and I said time for either dog or equine therapy. She loves both.

Sometimes we just need to vent. A great place to do that.

Margaret

I've done this with my mother. Took a long time to find this place. Thank you for putting into words the "process".

I wish her no ill will. She has been/is/always will be an angry person. I suspect she was abused in her youth but that doesn't mean she has free will to be toxic about everything. It took me a long, long, long time to step back from trying to be the "ideal" daughter thinking this was my problem.

It spurred me on to connect in a totally different manner with my daughter and we have a loving relationship. We are best friends too!

Again thank you for another "aha" moment for me on this wonderful forum a women. Thank you for being in my life.

Cheri
Sunny Fairlawn, oHIo

Marcelynh wrote: »

So we are major flooding today. 20 inches of rain so far with more rain expected over the next three days. Falling at times at a rate of 4.5 inches per hour. The bayou and flood system can handle about 2 inches per hour but this down pour has overwhelmed it. The bayou behind my house is out of its banks on the opposite side. Hopefully it won't come over on our side. My house is up 4 ft but the garage would fill. I want my sunshine back.

Marcelyn
Underwater in Houston.

Good thots coming your way, hope all goes ok today for you and the flood waters don't come up. I thot about you when I saw the news last night. We got a lot of rain yesterday but not flooding by any means in our area.

Janetr OKC

Thank you for the warm welcome. Now I feel better...starving is so much easier with a big smile on my face -just kidding about the starving part. I love my juice -so far :-)

I am Bridget from Columbus OH

nb1959 - Noreen, is it? You brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing. I've not been in such a situation but have been deeply affected due to a close family member being there. I appreciate your insight on how you deal with your thots and emotions, it is commendable. You my dear, are a survivor. There are others here who have been in abusive situations also. Unfortunately, as I am finding out, it happens way more frequently then most of us are aware of or even want to admit and/or believe, when we do hear of it. God Bless.

Janetr OKC

Good morning everyone! I drove the kids to school this morning. It was so great! I'm FREE! I also drove to Home Depot and Big Lots to pick up some stuff I need for the studio. Now, I'm sitting in my studio. It feels like I had a little break and now am ready to get back to work. The only lingering problem is a little weakness in my right hand (which I think is getting better) and some headaches. All in all, I'd say I'm pretty lucky. It could have been so much worse. I think this will be my last week of PT.

Tonight is a chemistry department banquet at school. I think after I pick up the kids I'll go shopping and find something new to wear. What I really need are new dress shoes, since Bruno snacked on my good shoes a while back and they have not been replaced.

Tomorrow I'm going to Joplin with a friend to shop and have lunch with another friend. That should be fun. Then we have a co-op meeting tomorrow night. So, don't worry about me if I don't check in tomorrow. I'll be busy.

Have a great day!

Sylvia

.

Katla wrote: Last night I spent about half an hour watching little fish jumping in the shallows near the edge of the river. I think they were smelt and may have been getting ready to spawn. I probably stood there for half an hour watching the show they put on.

This reminds me of one of the most magical moments back around New Year, when we were in northern Norway. We were walking along the shore on a small ridge between a lake and the sea. The lake was frozen and covered with snow but right at the outlet there was a patch of ice maybe two inches thick and clear as glass. Through it we could see the water trickling between rocks and tree roots. And there were dozens of tiny fish swimming around. The water was only a few inches deep and the fish were all under an inch long. It was like looking through a window into a different world.

Thanks for jogging my memory, Katla! :flowerforyou:

Sylvia - The turnip field reminds me of spring in central Sweden. They grow lots of rapeseed there and the fields turn exactly the same color yellow. No surprise: rapeseed is a member of the turnip family. (Oh, and in the US they call it canola oil rather than rapeseed oil - for fairly obvious reasons.)

I'm back home now. Many of you are talking about gardening and outdoor activities and temperatures in the 70s and 80s... I simply can't get my head around the concept! I had great weather too, so I went for a long walk. But in my case, great weather means clear sunny skies, -8°C (about 15°F) and no wind.

The sun went down for the last time last night (last time until late August anyway) and everything is covered with pure white snow. That means it's incredibly bright up here at this time of year. Blindingly bright. To protect my eyes, I've got glasses that darken when exposed to UV and today they turned totally black. They were fine for walking outside, but when I came indoors again I couldn't see a thing, not even with the lights turned on. I had to switch to indoor glasses.

Here's a picture I took from the plane at midnight, just after we started our descent. It wasn't midnight sun yet, but almost.

/Penny, happily back at the

I'm new to this group, but not to MFP. I had great success in 2013, lost 25 lbs, my 23 year old wedding dress was too big, and then bam - I hit 50 and had major surgery and gained it all back. Now I guess my body has changed, (Mother Nature is cruel!) and I can't seem to lose even 3 lbs. Or if I do, it comes right back. I work out daily, cardio, strength training, Pilates and log my food. I aim for healthy, whole "real" foods whenever possible, but wow what a difference 3 years makes! My goal was 20 lbs but now I would be thrilled with 10. Help...

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Hi gals,

Cheri – sending good thoughts on the job front, that is similar to what I faced in 2008, that got me into having my own business…. The finances are still a challenge, but the boss is a gem….LOL

Larissa – sounds like that worked out fine, you did not invest much and yet had an evening out.

AWE – Chris – who doesn’t love a good romance!!!!!

Barbie and others regarding reunions – I went twice, 10 and 15, and both times really wanted to go and have fun, and both times had at best an ok time, ours were at pretty fancy places so were quite pricy.. when the 20th came around I decided to help plan it, to see if some of my friends could be found and convinced to go… well two meetings in, when the old cheerleaders (planning committee) said about someone on the missing list – who happened to be my best friend in high school – we don’t need to try to find her – she was too boring, we don’t want the boring ones at our party. I stayed silent, went home wrote a resignation letter to the committee and signed it best friend of a “boring one”… High school was not that great and there were over 700 people in our class so it was the size of a small town…

Anne – just pop in when you can…. I am glad to hear you are focusing on you.

KJ – fun way to word our group that we spark joy – I agree with you….

Miriam – question for you on mulching with pine needles – I have heard it is to acidic for use around some plants… I don’t have any pine, so no personal experience, but wondered.

Marcelyn – take care! Hoping that bayou “don’t rise” …

Pip – congrats on the run, congrats on such a peach of a DH – Kirby is amazing…

Chris - I am sad for you with the situation with your Mom, I have 2 siblings neither who I am close to – and I know when my Mom goes it will be a nightmare. My brother is armed and dangerous, but just on the right side of the law.. and my sister’s last communication in email was telling me that I was the cause of pollution by daring to breath, and the world would be better if I stopped. I am the executor and the beneficiary of the trust, so the feelings that exist will be exaggerated, as my sister and brother have one thing in common - greed. I have danced with anger, hurt and shame, and have distanced myself from most of it, and have gotten past most of the anger, but not always the hurt. Many many years of counseling have gotten me to this place, and I am slowly taking the next steps, of which weight loss is one.

NB (Noreen? Right?) Excellent choices, excellent wording, you can feel the peace in reading your post.

The changling – you are approaching the journey we are all on from a different angle than I am, but the end result is the same better health…. I am glad you are doing it with a doc’s supervision, join in with us and we will all wander the journey together.

Pollance – I don’t remember, is there a specific reason for staying under 1000 calories, that is too low for many people, and if you get too low your body responds differently as the nutrition mix is not right.

Hawaii – I have only dreamed about it… I would love to see it, both the history, the parks, and diving in the ocean… the commercial part – not so much…


I hike with a hiking group I found on Meetup.com there is a hike 3-5 weekday mornings different folks plan them, so we stay mostly in the local area (30-45 min drive from my home) and hike for 2-3 hours I usually do the Tuesday morning hike, but have been wanting to try the hike that is done on Mondays so today was it… this is a picture of me at the top after climbing Heart Attack Hill.


Kim from N. California

Hi all! I'm hoooooome!

Good journey home. I found a great sushi meal to have on the train, including chicken yakitori.

After DGD told me all about the scary thunderstorm, she went upstairs and acted it all out with DH. Ain't kids fabulous! She was banging on the doors and laughing, saying it was a thunderstorm and the rain was pouring down.
Miss them already.

Noreen - I too was an abused child. It took me many, many years and a LOT of therapy ($$$$$) to find my current peace. I am now writing my memoirs.

In my Norwegian lessons I am now learning the past tense. An example is - I drank the whole bottle. Add that to my previous present tense - My glass is completely empty - and I've got it covered. :noway:

Today in London I was answering the phone call from the holiday company and looking out of the back window when I saw a strange face staring at me from the top of the shed. It was looking straight at me and all I could see was its face as it was looking over a parapet. It was a fox. The strangest thing is that it was sharing the roof with a cat!

Posting a photo I took of Bea, while she was snorting away with her cold. I had the privilege of changing her dirty nappy and giving her a bath.

Love Heather UK

Heather - Bea is so cute, she melts your heart
Noreen - that is scary!!!! can alligators climb?

Kim in N. Cal (with NO alligators!!!!)

Kim, your reunion planning story makes me mad. Why have a class reunion unless you invite everybody? Good job on your resignation letter.

I still live relatively close to my hometown and have been on our reunion planning committee every time. I did not consider myself popular in high school, but I was involved and was a good student. I thought of myself as a nerd (and I was), but the others act like I was "one of them" in school. I guess they don't remember that I never went to the school dances and was never invited to their weekend parties. I see two of my former classmates almost daily at the gym. We were a class of about 60 and have lost about 10. Our 45 year mark will be coming up in 2017. I don't know if we will have a reunion or if we'll wait until 50 in 2022.

As for college reunions, I never go to those. I graduated in three years and the school so big that I probably wouldn't know anybody. Now, if my doctoral cohort would have a reunion, I'd go to that, but I don't see it happening. I keep up with a few of those classmates.