LGBT chit-chatters?
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Being in a monogamous does NOT generally mean halting all attraction to other people. I'm a lesbian in a very happy monogamous relationship, I would never ACT on my attraction to other women, but it would be a bold-face lie to pretend that I'm not just a little tempted when a beautiful woman hits on me. So, just because she is happily monogamous with her man, doesnt stop all sexual attraction she has to other men AND women.
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saragreen012 wrote: »Being in a monogamous does NOT generally mean halting all attraction to other people. I'm a lesbian in a very happy monogamous relationship, I would never ACT on my attraction to other women, but it would be a bold-face lie to pretend that I'm not just a little tempted when a beautiful woman hits on me. So, just because she is happily monogamous with her man, doesnt stop all sexual attraction she has to other men AND women.
Being attracted to someone is one thing. Being sexual with them is another. Perhaps there's a difference of opinion of how sexuality is defined. Personally, I don't think an attraction defines a sexuality. Attractions are often fleeting, usually temporary and acting upon them is entirely optional.
straight person defining other peoples sexualities
what a concept4 -
SassyMommasaurus wrote: »salembambi wrote: »salembambi wrote: »jaelynsmith wrote: »SassyMommasaurus wrote: »jaelynsmith wrote: »jaelynsmith wrote: »Hey all
I'm 27 bisexual woman, in a monogamous relationship with my husband of 7 years 
let's be friends! Need some motivational friends to kick me in the A**
My condolences
WTF does that even mean?
That they feel sorry for you?
Understand where they're coming from since I don't believe monogamy. Not as fun.
So because they can't be in a monogamous relationship, they have to be rude about the choice I made for my life? If that's the kind of people in this chat group, I'm out.
You are married to a man and are monogamous within your marriage, which is a lifetime commitment. Yet you still identify as bisexual?
You seem to feel sincerely offended by the comment offered. Yet you intentionally entered a thread for LGBT people, where traditional values are not usually commonplace. Perhaps you'd be more compatible chatting in threads with monogamous women married to men who limit themselves to having sex only with their husbands.
Have you considered entering discussions at religious sites where monogamy is valued and practiced by both the men and the women? The likelihood of becoming the recipient of comments like the one you take umbrage to is probably nil.
MFP is about "fitness". Consequently most discussions are body related and include heaps and heaps of: 1) body consciousness, 2) body celebration, 2) body fixation, 3) body hobbies (promiscuity), 4) crude jokes, 5) sexual innuendo, 6) obsession with appearance; and 7) various expressions of dysmorphia.
Sometimes it's more fun to lurk and count your blessings. Otherwise, like I said - go with the religious sites.
just because someone is in a committed relationship does not all the sudden make them no longer bisexual.....
when i date someone i am always bisexual i dont suddenly only like dcks or vag
If woman is married to a man, who identifies as monogamous, and also identifies as bisexual - it would be prudent to question what the future holds in terms of maintaining said monogamy.
I love the bisexuals and homosexuals in my life as neighbors, friends, co-workers, family members, etc.
But if I were being pursued romantically by a man who identified as bisexual, and he promised me commitment and monogamy whilst still identifying as bisexual - I would feel very uncertain about how he would manage temptation futuristically and decline the offer.
oh damn i forgot
bisexuals are sluts how silly of me
let me just listen to someone who is not bisexual tell me what it is to be bisexual
I didn't make that specific generalization actually. I was commenting on the curiousness of why a person who had made a marital commitment to a member of the opposite sex would continue to identify as bisexual. I interpret it as Yeah, I'm married but I continue to leave my options open.
I identify as heterosexual and always have. However, when I was sexually active I was always monogamous. I understood there was dick all around me, some it attached to attractive faces and bodies. But once my commitment was made - I knew the dick all around me was none of my business and presented no temptation for me. I understand there are bisexuals and homosexuals who take commitment seriously and respond the same way.
you don't stop being bisexual when you're in a relationship.
I know a lot of people who stopped being bisexual when they had committed to a single relationship, regardless of the gender to which they had committed.
If they had committed to a woman, they stopped having sex with men and no longer identified as bisexual. If they had committed to a man, they stopped having sex with women and no longer identified as bisexual.
If that commitment was to the opposite gender and was a lifetime commitment (marriage) - the sex they were having was exclusively heterosexual. If that commitment was to the same gender and was a lifetime commitment (marriage) - the sex they were having was exclusively homosexual.
oh I call BS, no one stops being their sexuality. I say anyone who "changed" after being in a committed relationship never was to begin with or just saying otherwise because of their partners insecurities.4 -
I am straight. But I honestly don't see why it's okay for a woman to wears men's clothing. But the moment a guy puts on something feminine everyone loses their everloving mind.
What's really the difference? They're all clothes. We wear what we want and that's how it should be.
I'm a B!4 -
saragreen012 wrote: »Being in a monogamous does NOT generally mean halting all attraction to other people. I'm a lesbian in a very happy monogamous relationship, I would never ACT on my attraction to other women, but it would be a bold-face lie to pretend that I'm not just a little tempted when a beautiful woman hits on me. So, just because she is happily monogamous with her man, doesnt stop all sexual attraction she has to other men AND women.
Being attracted to someone is one thing. Being sexual with them is another. Perhaps there's a difference of opinion of how sexuality is defined. Personally, I don't think an attraction defines a sexuality. Attractions are often fleeting, usually temporary and acting upon them is entirely optional.
I'm very much sexually attracted to both Men and Women, I am very much emotionally attracted to them equally too, I don't think monogamy is normal because I fall in love so easily with both men and women and feel it's not fair that I should be forced to only love one person because society says I have to.
So again, tell me about my own sexuality since you know it so well without being bi-sexual?
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Jimmies are being rustled...and not in the good way.2
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salembambi wrote: »saragreen012 wrote: »Being in a monogamous does NOT generally mean halting all attraction to other people. I'm a lesbian in a very happy monogamous relationship, I would never ACT on my attraction to other women, but it would be a bold-face lie to pretend that I'm not just a little tempted when a beautiful woman hits on me. So, just because she is happily monogamous with her man, doesnt stop all sexual attraction she has to other men AND women.
Being attracted to someone is one thing. Being sexual with them is another. Perhaps there's a difference of opinion of how sexuality is defined. Personally, I don't think an attraction defines a sexuality. Attractions are often fleeting, usually temporary and acting upon them is entirely optional.
straight person defining other peoples sexualities
what a concept
Did someone really just flag you because the didn't agree with you? lol3 -
SassyMommasaurus wrote: »salembambi wrote: »saragreen012 wrote: »Being in a monogamous does NOT generally mean halting all attraction to other people. I'm a lesbian in a very happy monogamous relationship, I would never ACT on my attraction to other women, but it would be a bold-face lie to pretend that I'm not just a little tempted when a beautiful woman hits on me. So, just because she is happily monogamous with her man, doesnt stop all sexual attraction she has to other men AND women.
Being attracted to someone is one thing. Being sexual with them is another. Perhaps there's a difference of opinion of how sexuality is defined. Personally, I don't think an attraction defines a sexuality. Attractions are often fleeting, usually temporary and acting upon them is entirely optional.
straight person defining other peoples sexualities
what a concept
Did someone really just flag you because the didn't agree with you? lol
You must be new to MFP.
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35yoF Bi - Its 2016 and I'm still amazed at how some people are confused about how things work in this world.
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sunn_lighter wrote: »ok I get that if you're in a monogomous relationship you still get to look and be attracted to other people so if youre bi that means you still look and are attracted to women even though youre with a man
people do look whether you're straight or gay don't matter in that
but
if youre bi aren't you kind of giving up a part of what you need/want/definition of yourself if you choose to be monogomous
like can you be totally satisfied with one or the other
*runs and hides*
I don't believe you do. Yeah I was "mostly" happy for 10 years in a relationship with a man. (reasons I was not happy had to deal with him being and idiot and not keeping a job) I once believe monogamy was what I wanted as I've grown I've realized otherwise. But I was happy in my relationship with him. My ex and I use to, and still do sometimes, check out girls together lol.0 -
sunn_lighter wrote: »SassyMommasaurus wrote: »sunn_lighter wrote: »ok I get that if you're in a monogomous relationship you still get to look and be attracted to other people so if youre bi that means you still look and are attracted to women even though youre with a man
people do look whether you're straight or gay don't matter in that
but
if youre bi aren't you kind of giving up a part of what you need/want/definition of yourself if you choose to be monogomous
like can you be totally satisfied with one or the other
*runs and hides*
I don't believe you do. Yeah I was "mostly" happy for 10 years in a relationship with a man. (reasons I was not happy had to deal with him being and idiot and not keeping a job) I once believe monogamy was what I wanted as I've grown I've realized otherwise. But I was happy in my relationship with him. My ex and I use to, and still do sometimes, check out girls together lol.
you don't believe i do what?
giving up a part of what you need/want/definition of yourself1 -
The stigma behind bi-sexuality is that we want to *kitten* everyone and are unhappy in long term relationships. Never has been true.
My dislike for Monogamy hasn't anything to do with my bi-sexuality, I just love to love I would be my happiest just surrounded by people I love and love me back and love each other.3 -
xCyanideGirlx wrote: »Guys look sexy in skirts.
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sunn_lighter wrote: »SassyMommasaurus wrote: »sunn_lighter wrote: »SassyMommasaurus wrote: »sunn_lighter wrote: »ok I get that if you're in a monogomous relationship you still get to look and be attracted to other people so if youre bi that means you still look and are attracted to women even though youre with a man
people do look whether you're straight or gay don't matter in that
but
if youre bi aren't you kind of giving up a part of what you need/want/definition of yourself if you choose to be monogomous
like can you be totally satisfied with one or the other
*runs and hides*
I don't believe you do. Yeah I was "mostly" happy for 10 years in a relationship with a man. (reasons I was not happy had to deal with him being and idiot and not keeping a job) I once believe monogamy was what I wanted as I've grown I've realized otherwise. But I was happy in my relationship with him. My ex and I use to, and still do sometimes, check out girls together lol.
you don't believe i do what?
giving up a part of what you need/want/definition of yourself
oh ok
i guess it would be the price of admission for monogamy but idk seems difficult to do
You don't stop being your sexuality when you enter a relationship. If you are still Straight, Gay, Lesbian, Pan, Bi but people don't think people being like "We're gay and in a monogamist relationship" like this, but Bi or Pan they do which doesn't make sense.4 -
I used to identify as a lesbian but here I am in my most productive best relationship with a sweet mildmannered man. Outside of him I dont find myself attracted to men, but I will check out their lady dates though (but I dont ogle).
ETA: So I'm not sure if I'm bi because I'm dating him or if I'm gay with a bf. At this time I cant imagine dating another man. Ive come to a conclusion though to not overstress identifying myself and instead enjoy myself and him and the new things I've discovered with him.2 -
frammis4242 wrote: »xCyanideGirlx wrote: »Guys look sexy in skirts.
I would like to like this 100 times, man in a kilt with a Scottish accent....omg lol1
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