Is porn ruining expectations about sex?

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Replies

  • cccerberus
    cccerberus Posts: 26 Member
    edited August 2016
    lenoresdream wrote: »

    I generally believe men want porn stars for gfs in bed.

    What Men want is simple;
    A Lady in public
    A Chef in the Kitchen
    and a low mileage monogamous freak in the bedroom
    (normally, the saying says 'a *kitten* in the bedroom' but that's not really right in my case at least)

    And yes, porn usually does create unrealistic ideas in men.. and probably some women too, though far fewer i'm sure.
    **edit: interesting word substitution filter there. I presume you all know it didn't say kitten when i typed it..
  • merryward13
    merryward13 Posts: 1,662 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    All I know is no matter how hard I try, I can't get on board with dirt talking. I start laughing. "Who's your daddy?".....my eyes roll. I can't hide it. I'm loud....naturally....but sheesh is that not enough? Now I have to talk dirty too? I kid you not....one guy was trying to get me to talk dirty and I tried to play along. I'm on top doing my thing, and he literally asked me if I was going to make him a sandwich afterwards. Like that was part of the talk that was supposed to be turning him on.

    I got off, got dressed and left.

    I'm dead. Who thinks sandwiches are hot?
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    edited August 2016
    My husband and I have been together since our early 20's. Back in the 90's. So, we weren't as influenced by porn. And neither of us particularly like mainstream porn. It's just too fake and stuff. But, we do like erotic photos. Just prettier, classier, more professional in a way. I'm very experimental sexually, though. I always have been, and always continue to be. Which I think is probably just naturally my personality type to some degree. I'm also a dancer, so very physical and sensual. And (sorry to get personal), but I was sexually abused as a child, so I was introduced to sex as a very young child, and I do believe that had an influence on me. I think I was sexual at a younger age and developed interest in things that I probably wouldn't have otherwise. And I had a lot of "sexual training" to deal with. It was distressful to me at times, but I grew and learned healthier ways to reclaim my sexuality (with my husband), and with other helpful resources. I think everything sexual that we encounter influences us in some way. Negative things can influence us. I don't want to get into why because it's long and complex, but I do understand why (unless someone really wants to know). And then when we are old enough to explore sexuality and be consensually sexual we are influenced by the things we like, that intrigue us. But, sex is best to be enjoyed. Trying to be like a porn film isn't enjoyable. I do also really like certain types of lingerie and sexy outfits, but just the things I am drawn to because I like them on me.
  • DetroitDarin
    DetroitDarin Posts: 955 Member
    Geezus a metric sht ton of generalizations here.

    Here's what happens in Porn - when watching - I mean WATCHING it...our bodies, our minds - cannot tell that it's not actually us doing the thing. We process what we see and our minds get all clingy and feeling like that's us.

    Some women like hearing the sounds - not the exaggerated bullcrap in most of the 'pro' vids - but the sounds of folks genuinely getting it on. Sounds hot. Some men like it because they can mentally attach to having the 12" wood and all that.

    Porn or toys or whatever - it's terrific as long as the man and woman are enjoying it - singularly or alone. Nothing is bad in and of itself.

    Porn can probably lead to some negative things - but that's the choice of the viewer.

    I think it's goofy when folks actually try to be all sexy - or to emulate what they see in the movies. To me acting is not sexy; forcing things is not sexy. Sexy is a man and woman hell-bent on making sure 'this' happens like...'right now'. If a porn is playing on the tv in the background and they love it? Great. If they're in a room with other folks doing it? And everyone loves it? perfect. If they're alone in the dark and afraid to make a sound? Actually - that's awful unless they are sneaking one right quick and dont wanna get caught.

    :D
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    cccerberus wrote: »
    lenoresdream wrote: »

    I generally believe men want porn stars for gfs in bed.

    What Men want is simple;
    A Lady in public
    A Chef in the Kitchen
    and a low mileage monogamous freak in the bedroom
    (normally, the saying says 'a *kitten* in the bedroom' but that's not really right in my case at least)

    And yes, porn usually does create unrealistic ideas in men.. and probably some women too, though far fewer i'm sure.
    **edit: interesting word substitution filter there. I presume you all know it didn't say kitten when i typed it..

    I thought the saying was like you first said: "A lady in the streets, a freak in the sheets".
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  • Sloth2016
    Sloth2016 Posts: 838 Member
    Would explain the look of fear in the eyes of the sheep in the neighborhood pasture.
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  • BigDougie1211
    BigDougie1211 Posts: 3,531 Member
    It was awkward man, I can tell you. He's seen things no 13 year old should have.
    I had to have a word with his Mum after about a little more parental supervision of his browsing.
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  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited August 2016
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  • Damien_K
    Damien_K Posts: 783 Member
    Porn is only good if your significant other sends you some raunchy pics while at work.
  • TheBigFb
    TheBigFb Posts: 649 Member
    hmmmm, im gonna stay out fo this one
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Apparently I'm too old for this question. It must be an issue for the Internet age or something. I mean, men I dated watched porn and stuff (the old-fashioned way) but never seemed to expect me to live up to anything I don't think. It never seemed to be an issue ...

    There isn't a man out there who I've known in the biblical sense who's younger than 40 now, though.

    And I want pizza. Now. Cold pizza for breakfast is the best.
  • jtegirl
    jtegirl Posts: 1,137 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    merryward13 wrote: »
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    All I know is no matter how hard I try, I can't get on board with dirt talking. I start laughing. "Who's your daddy?".....my eyes roll. I can't hide it. I'm loud....naturally....but sheesh is that not enough? Now I have to talk dirty too? I kid you not....one guy was trying to get me to talk dirty and I tried to play along. I'm on top doing my thing, and he literally asked me if I was going to make him a sandwich afterwards. Like that was part of the talk that was supposed to be turning him on.

    I got off, got dressed and left.

    I'm dead. Who thinks sandwiches are hot?

    Idk....maybe it was like a control thing? I just couldn't after that.

    Like...Oh yeah baby, do you want mustard or mayo? Cut into squares or triangles? Mmm.....is that how you like it?

    That reminds me of the scene in Trainwreck where she's asking John Cena to talk dirty!! LMAO

  • JukeboxHeroine
    JukeboxHeroine Posts: 348 Member
    pdm3547 wrote: »
    Porn has set unrealistic expectations about expecting a plumber to turn up on time for an appointment.

    LMAO! And not have a hairy *kitten* crack.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    kevinf2380 wrote: »
    Sugar_Pill wrote: »
    kevinf2380 wrote: »
    Do you feel the need to live up to porn movie type sex when dating?

    Like- the acting or the boning?

    Boning, for girls especially. A lot of times there's like zero foreplay.
    I got 70% of my foreplay ideas from porn.

    A guy showing up with food, a package, or fixing my terrible plumbing are all very sexy and thoughtful things.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Caporegiem wrote: »
    When you derail a thread about porn..are you a good guy or a bad guy in mods eyes?

    You're a gosh darn hero is what.
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member
    Sugar_Pill wrote: »
    jessiferrrb wrote: »
    Great. Now I'm craving pizza and porn.

    On the round table

    hold on ladies, i have a delivery for you both.

  • sunnybeaches105
    sunnybeaches105 Posts: 2,831 Member
    Wait, those aren't sex education videos?
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    Fitwarrior7_Round_2 wrote: »
    Oh you mean your not supposed to finish on women's faces? >:)

    Depends on the woman. o:)>:)
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    All I know is no matter how hard I try, I can't get on board with dirty talking. I start laughing. "Who's your daddy?".....my eyes roll. I can't hide it. I'm loud....naturally....but sheesh is that not enough? Now I have to talk dirty too? I kid you not....one guy was trying to get me to talk dirty and I tried to play along. I'm on top doing my thing, and he literally asked me if I was going to make him a sandwich afterwards. Like that was part of the talk that was supposed to be turning him on.

    I got off, got dressed and left.

    i can't do it either. if i say anything remotely dirty it has to come from a genuine place. otherwise, it's hilarious. and i really do not want anyone one i am having sex with to call me "daddy." yeesh.

    however, i am interested in sandwiches.
  • AriesGal329
    AriesGal329 Posts: 236 Member
    Well I can tell you porn can be extremely destructive. My ex husband had an addiction to it. It sickens the soul.
  • BigDougie1211
    BigDougie1211 Posts: 3,531 Member
    lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »
    Well I can tell you porn can be extremely destructive. My ex husband had an addiction to it. It sickens the soul.

    I don't mean to sound flippant, but couldn't anything be extremely destructive to an addict?
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