my husband thinks that I am ungrateful
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Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
The post right before yours was talking about feeding.
The response is always going to depend on the relationship and roles. Different people have different roles and expectations or reactions based on previous experience. I said I would thank him, be appreciative, give a hug, and say I had decided I wasn't going to eat this at least for a little while. Options being: give it to him and the kids, keep it in a cabinet that has food in it that I don't eat (food for the kids and him), take it to work. I would respond the same if my partner was a woman. There have been times when I bought my husband a lot of surprise gifts with the types of chocolate that I know he likes. He did ask me at one point to stop getting him so much surprise candy gifts.1 -
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Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
Do women give men chocolates?
Yeah, I used to surprise my husband all the time with chocolate gifts. His favorite types and various chocolate peanut butter things. Until he wanted me to not always buy him so much chocolate.3 -
Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
Do women give men chocolates?
My boyfriend loves them and I buy him a lot of chocolate, just as a small simple gift. I don't tend to buy them as much anymore though, he gets pimples if he eats too much chocolate and he can't portion his servings, and he hates pimples! Such a dillemma lol
Buy him chocolate and a facial scrub...problem solved!3 -
I don't think will power means (at least not to me) sitting and looking at food all day trying to resist it. Will power to me means being resolute in your goals. Eating the box isn't necessarily weak in will power either if you get right back on track and learn from your mistake.2
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Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
Do women give men chocolates?
I bring the Hubster chocolate. And ice cream. And cookies.1 -
Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
Do women give men chocolates?
Why wouldn't they? I mean I like dark chocolate so occassionally my wife will buy me a dark chocolate bar because I like dark chocolate. I don't know perhaps I live in a bubble and thats really strange but if it is an outlier I have to ask why. Its not like men don't like chocolate.
So there is this expectation that good husbands buy their wives chocolate to show that they love them but that a wife buying their husband chocolate is weird? Uh...why? What is the difference?
Ok. My mom used to buy my stepfather roses so I guess, "Why not?"0 -
Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
Do women give men chocolates?
I absolutely give my husband chocolate! And I have been married 20 years and still get surprises from him.. he knows the way to my heart is through my stomach and something shiny.2 -
Hubby is the stay at home spouse, and I buy him chocolate all the time. He likes a bit as an after dinner treat.2
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No, no, no no no no no no no no no no no heroin addicts should not go to their old haunts. Food addicts shouldn't go to a bakery.Aaron_K123 wrote: »If you have an addiction that negatively affects your health you should confront it, not hide from it.0 -
DisruptedMatrix wrote: »
No, no, no no no no no no no no no no no heroin addicts should not go to their old haunts.Aaron_K123 wrote: »If you have an addiction that negatively affects your health you should confront it, not hide from it.
I'm talking about food addictions...not freaking heroine. Chocolate is not heroine.
Eat a ton of chocolate, worse case scenario you have a stomach ache. Shoot up a bunch of heroine, worse case scenario you die. Not the same ballpark.
I'm sorry but I do not accept this idea that talking about food addictions its at all remotely reasonable to draw comparisons to something like heroine.7 -
cerise_noir wrote: »Girl, just say NO!! That's called sabotage! Maybe he thinks if you lose weight you will not want him anymore - try to encourage him and let him know this will give you "more energy" to enjoy him even more....he'll like that!!
Sabotage? Yeah, how dare he buy his wife chocolates for her birthday. What a fool.
Yes, that was a foolish gift to give him. Would you buy cigarettes for someone that is trying to kick the habit?0 -
Science disagrees with you.cerise_noir wrote: »
Drug addiction is not anywhere near the same as "sugar addiction". It irks me when the two are similarly compared.
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DisruptedMatrix wrote: »
Science disagrees with you.cerise_noir wrote: »
Drug addiction is not anywhere near the same as "sugar addiction". It irks me when the two are similarly compared.
Oh you mean the study that shows rats choose food (sugar) over non food (drugs) which is a no trainer or the one that says it stimulates dopamine which in really everything you like stimulates4 -
How did this turn into drug and cigarette addiction?
We are talking food..!!!!!2 -
DisruptedMatrix wrote: »
Science disagrees with you.cerise_noir wrote: »
Drug addiction is not anywhere near the same as "sugar addiction". It irks me when the two are similarly compared.
No it doesn't don't be ridiculous. There is a big difference between being tempted by a food you like and a chemically addictive drug.
Comparing chocolate to heroine is insultingly naive. You know a lot of people who break open their child's piggy bank and hop in their car at 3am to drive to some sketch part of town and buy some Hershey bar only to be found later passed out in their vehicle still clutching the wrapper?9 -
Steps forward and backwards, just make sure there are more 'forward ' than 'backwards'. Slow and steady1
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Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
I would give the same advice which was that OP should cut her husband some slack. I don't think a person is thoughtless but are giving chocolates either out of habit or not having their s/o's new restrictions in the forefront of their mind.1 -
Aaron_K123 wrote: »
It looked like recent posts about feeders were going in that direction.Aaron_K123 wrote: »Aaron_K123 wrote: »I was just sitting here trying to picture the gender-swapped version of this post and how people might react to that.
Do you mean women who feed men to keep them overweight?
Well that is assuming a lot about the OPs post. No, I meant like the swap of the OPs post. So a wife gifting a husband chocolates and the husband being visibily distraught and upset about it and the wife feeling that the husband was being ungrateful.
Where did you get feeding from that? Buying someone chocolate is feeding them now?
Ah...I was just refering to the original post not what others may have said. I was wondering if the response would have been the same if a husband came on here complaining about a thoughtless wife gifting him chocolates when he was trying to diet. My feeling is he wouldn't have recieved much sympathy.
I would give the same advice which was that OP should cut her husband some slack. I don't think a person is thoughtless but are giving chocolates either out of habit or not having their s/o's new restrictions in the forefront of their mind.
I don't think husbands mean to be unthoughtful, forgetful or mean harm or foul.. sometimes the excitement of doing something nice for your wife might cause the excitement to oversee all else.
Our husbands either know the boundaries and completely forget, or there are there are none to begin with. Perhaps OP is quiet about this, he is not a mind reader..1 -
Aaron_K123 wrote: »DisruptedMatrix wrote: »
Science disagrees with you.cerise_noir wrote: »
Drug addiction is not anywhere near the same as "sugar addiction". It irks me when the two are similarly compared.
No it doesn't don't be ridiculous. There is a big difference between being tempted by a food you like and a chemically addictive drug.
Comparing chocolate to heroine is insultingly naive. You know a lot of people who break open their child's piggy bank and hop in their car at 3am to drive to some sketch part of town and buy some Hershey bar only to be found later passed out in their vehicle still clutching the wrapper?
Maybe not a good analogy, millions of folks slowing killing themselves by overeating. Some not so slow when heartache hits.3
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