Non friendly females in the gym.
Replies
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I don't go up to McDonald's employees doing their job and make small talk while waiting in the drive through; I see it as most folk are going to the gym to 'WORK'out; not to discuss their current life problems. We ain't unfriendly; we just have other places to socialize, and quite frankly; you are interrupting our set most likely.
-From a generically unfriendly gym goer it seems.6 -
Alatariel75 wrote: »I've been thinking about this a bit and here's the thing.
I'm married, late 30's and as far as looks go, I'm average. I don't think people would run away, but I'm no stunner. I am, however, very friendly and usually up for a chat. This has reduced over the years though, because of the number of instances where my willingness to smile, say hello and make small talk has resulted in awkward situations where all of a sudden I'm being hit on.
A lot of guys, especially those who may not be spoiled for choice on the lady front, mistake friendliness for interest. I have found myself many times having to tone down my willingness to be friendly to avoid having to knock someone back when they see it as an opportunity to pursue something more than a friendly chat. This has happened in circumstances where the guy knows damn well I'm married, hell - it's happened when the friendly chat has taken place with my husband standing right there, and then the next time I see the guy and I'm alone, he presses his suit. There's actually a shop near me that I used to frequent that I won't go to alone anymore because of this.
So, from my point of view, therein lies the issue. I'm now gun-shy of having a friendly chat, because all too often the guy wasn't just in it for a friendly chat, he was trying to open up an avenue. If that means that I get thought of as less friendly now, so be it. I'd rather that than be backed into an awkward or uncomfortable corner that I then have to maneuver out of.
This. This whole thing right here.8 -
I don't go up to McDonald's employees doing their job and make small talk while waiting in the drive through; I see it as most folk are going to the gym to 'WORK'out; not to discuss their current life problems. We ain't unfriendly; we just have other places to socialize, and quite frankly; you are interrupting our set most likely.
-From a generically unfriendly gym goer it seems.
Why do you hate us?3 -
Motorsheen wrote: »I don't go up to McDonald's employees doing their job and make small talk while waiting in the drive through; I see it as most folk are going to the gym to 'WORK'out; not to discuss their current life problems. We ain't unfriendly; we just have other places to socialize, and quite frankly; you are interrupting our set most likely.
-From a generically unfriendly gym goer it seems.
Why do you hate us?
It's not you. It's me. *soft pat*0 -
Motorsheen wrote: »I don't go up to McDonald's employees doing their job and make small talk while waiting in the drive through; I see it as most folk are going to the gym to 'WORK'out; not to discuss their current life problems. We ain't unfriendly; we just have other places to socialize, and quite frankly; you are interrupting our set most likely.
-From a generically unfriendly gym goer it seems.
Why do you hate us?
It's not you. It's me. *soft pat*
If I had a dollar for every time I heard that.....0 -
TannedTiger wrote: »we only wanna talk to girls who wear yoga pants and or shorts so short riding up their butt crack.
otherwise, science has proven that men love weights more than women
Ut oh.0 -
rugratz2015 wrote: »[
This ^^^ I don't get it either, ok, unless they just finished work, so they should have remover, but the ones that don't??? There a definitely a few girls in my gym that are only there for the lads.
I always wore makeup to the gym when I went because I'm self-conscious. Whether anyone else thinks that the gym is a place to feel self-conscious or not, that's how I felt, so I'd go with it still on, and then I'd wash it off when I got home.
I don't see what the big deal is.I find it strange because : if it was me It would be in streaks down my face from working out.
If you're too self conscious to go with a naked face then I'm presuming you're too self conscious to work out in tiny shorts and bra tops as well?
These girls aren't - nor do they actually work out.
Actually, no. Now that I'm fitter than I've ever been I do sometimes work out in things like that. Why does it matter?
That's my go to workout clothes and I'm a beast at the gym.. Yoga shorts and a sports bra.. It gets hot as hell when your pushing yourself to your limits..2 -
rugratz2015 wrote: »[
This ^^^ I don't get it either, ok, unless they just finished work, so they should have remover, but the ones that don't??? There a definitely a few girls in my gym that are only there for the lads.
I always wore makeup to the gym when I went because I'm self-conscious. Whether anyone else thinks that the gym is a place to feel self-conscious or not, that's how I felt, so I'd go with it still on, and then I'd wash it off when I got home.
I don't see what the big deal is.I find it strange because : if it was me It would be in streaks down my face from working out.
If you're too self conscious to go with a naked face then I'm presuming you're too self conscious to work out in tiny shorts and bra tops as well?
These girls aren't - nor do they actually work out.
Actually, no. Now that I'm fitter than I've ever been I do sometimes work out in things like that. Why does it matter?
That's my go to workout clothes and I'm a beast at the gym.. Yoga shorts and a sports bra.. It gets hot as hell when your pushing yourself to your limits..
Mad, Mad Re5pext.
Iceland. .....
Are you hiring?1 -
TannedTiger wrote: »we only wanna talk to girls who wear yoga pants and or shorts so short riding up their butt crack.
otherwise, science has proven that men love weights more than women
Yeah no.. Just no.. Just.. I'd challenge you to a lifting competition.. And I'd kick your butt in my yoga shorts and sports bra..
I bet you don't even do Olympic lifting at all.4 -
Motorsheen wrote: »rugratz2015 wrote: »[
This ^^^ I don't get it either, ok, unless they just finished work, so they should have remover, but the ones that don't??? There a definitely a few girls in my gym that are only there for the lads.
I always wore makeup to the gym when I went because I'm self-conscious. Whether anyone else thinks that the gym is a place to feel self-conscious or not, that's how I felt, so I'd go with it still on, and then I'd wash it off when I got home.
I don't see what the big deal is.I find it strange because : if it was me It would be in streaks down my face from working out.
If you're too self conscious to go with a naked face then I'm presuming you're too self conscious to work out in tiny shorts and bra tops as well?
These girls aren't - nor do they actually work out.
Actually, no. Now that I'm fitter than I've ever been I do sometimes work out in things like that. Why does it matter?
That's my go to workout clothes and I'm a beast at the gym.. Yoga shorts and a sports bra.. It gets hot as hell when your pushing yourself to your limits..
Mad, Mad Re5pext.
Iceland. .....
Are you hiring?
Always... You're welcome to join the Viking movement.. You know how to clap right?1 -
Motorsheen wrote: »rugratz2015 wrote: »[
This ^^^ I don't get it either, ok, unless they just finished work, so they should have remover, but the ones that don't??? There a definitely a few girls in my gym that are only there for the lads.
I always wore makeup to the gym when I went because I'm self-conscious. Whether anyone else thinks that the gym is a place to feel self-conscious or not, that's how I felt, so I'd go with it still on, and then I'd wash it off when I got home.
I don't see what the big deal is.I find it strange because : if it was me It would be in streaks down my face from working out.
If you're too self conscious to go with a naked face then I'm presuming you're too self conscious to work out in tiny shorts and bra tops as well?
These girls aren't - nor do they actually work out.
Actually, no. Now that I'm fitter than I've ever been I do sometimes work out in things like that. Why does it matter?
That's my go to workout clothes and I'm a beast at the gym.. Yoga shorts and a sports bra.. It gets hot as hell when your pushing yourself to your limits..
Mad, Mad Re5pext.
Iceland. .....
Are you hiring?
Always... You're welcome to join the Viking movement.. You know how to clap right?
Clap?
Sometimes I miss.
But I'm willing to take lessons.0 -
Ok So let's review ...."Leave women alone at the gym cuz they are there 2 workout" ....So stop it u savages!!!!!0
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For some people, talking to others is not an enjoyable activity, it is work. It takes great effort. It's not fun, it's not a good time, it's not pleasant. Expecting someone to talk to you when they don't want to is demanding and selfish. Just because you enjoy idle conversation doesn't mean that the person you are trying to engage with does. No one owes you a good time, especially if your good time makes them miserable.
Extroverts will never understand what life is like for introverts. And, while it is also true that introverts will never understand extroverts, extroverts are not usually censured for their "friendly" behaviour in the way that introverts are censured for their "unfriendly" behaviour. As well, there is a much higher expectation to be friendly placed upon women than there is men so introverted women such as myself are really in a bit of a spot, aren't we? Yet we are forced, day in and day out, to make nice against our natural proclivities in a way that extroverts (and men) simply are not--it's a pretty rare thing to be told that you are too friendly, right? Much less common than it is for me to be told that I should smile, at any rate I'm willing to bet.
The thing is, I'm at peace with a whole lot of the world believing I am a *kitten* because I have a hard time making eye contact, I won't initiate conversation with most people, I have a serious case of resting *kitten* face, and I prefer to be alone. Can you be at peace living your life without the whole world wanting to chitty-chat? You really should be.
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We should start introducing alcohol at the gym ....Problem solved0
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My gym actually has a bar in it and a cafeteria.0
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born_of_fire74 wrote: »For some people, talking to others is not an enjoyable activity, it is work. It takes great effort. It's not fun, it's not a good time, it's not pleasant. Expecting someone to talk to you when they don't want to is demanding and selfish. Just because you enjoy idle conversation doesn't mean that the person you are trying to engage with does. No one owes you a good time, especially if your good time makes them miserable.
Extroverts will never understand what life is like for introverts. And, while it is also true that introverts will never understand extroverts, extroverts are not usually censured for their "friendly" behaviour in the way that introverts are censured for their "unfriendly" behaviour. As well, there is a much higher expectation to be friendly placed upon women than there is men so introverted women such as myself are really in a bit of a spot, aren't we? Yet we are forced, day in and day out, to make nice against our natural proclivities in a way that extroverts (and men) simply are not--it's a pretty rare thing to be told that you are too friendly, right? Much less common than it is for me to be told that I should smile, at any rate I'm willing to bet.
The thing is, I'm at peace with a whole lot of the world believing I am a *kitten* because I have a hard time making eye contact, I won't initiate conversation with most people, I have a serious case of resting *kitten* face, and I prefer to be alone. Can you be at peace living your life without the whole world wanting to chitty-chat? You really should be.
This. RBF is a blessing for an introvert who doesn't like or isn't good at small talk. The number of times in my life some condescending man (never once a woman mind you) has told me to smile as if he were doing me a favor by reminding me my face didn't please him is ridiculous. If someone wants to say something kind then I'm happy to reply with a smile, but I'm so tired of being chided because my thinking face isn't pleasant enough apparently.
Also - I take my glasses off for a lot of lifts at the gym - so chances are if I'm appearing to ignore someone I likely legitimately didn't even see them.13 -
Bar & Pizza?? I'm lucky if they clean the bathrooms3
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It's a well known fact that women are nice guy ATM's. You put nice guy in, and the ATM is required to allow you to withdraw whatever it is you requested, and then credit your account accordingly.
Sorry bro. Maybe speak to the gym management about getting their ATM's serviced?7 -
I say hello to everyone in the gym after I arrive and I'm walking through, but after that it's work time. I put my headphones in and I'm focused on my workout. I don't want to talk as I'm nearing out of breath or trying to focus on my form.3
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They're ya go!That's all we ask!!1
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I will smile and say good morning to those around the entrance when I'm walking in.... but as soon as my shoes and headphones are on, its game time. Don't talk to me, don't look at me, don't bug me. I'm here to work. If that makes me "non-friendly" than so be it. My goals are much more important than socializing!1
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I apologize 4 their behavior ...0
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I'm not trying 2 be a wise *kitten* ,but if it really becomes an issue where u hate going 2 the gym & being bothered by guys all the time ,there are gyms 4 just women ...I don't think ya should have 2 change ur life ..but I'm just sayin if it's really becoming a nightmare
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It could be your approach. I have had guys say hello then come up to me and give me a lecture on how I should change my whole workout routine. I never talk to them again, or of I saw them do it to someone else I'll ignore them. Then I had guys that are just friendly and I'm fine talking to them every time I see them. I'm not saying that you are like the type of person I'm talking about. But it could be a certain energy or vibe you are giving off OP. I would need more detail than "all females at the gym are not friendly."3
This discussion has been closed.
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