Things you should never say on a FIRST DATE

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  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    I forgot to tell you Im still married
    .........................

    Can we still be friends?

  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    I am Vald Tepes, call me Dracula.......
    ............................................................
    Im also a vegetarian and despise such earthly things like sodas.
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    He Says: I have a cryogenics capsule chamber in my basement, do you want to see?
    ............................................

    Me: Sees the capsule and its real......

    He Says: Do you want to look inside it?
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    We are on the same wavelength and frequency, we also have the same vibrations, your auroa is a rainbow..........................

    Do you have telepathic or empathic abilities?
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    edited April 2017
    Im an engineer and Im a mathematician, let me calibrate you.

    Winks........ trust me I know all the algorithms
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    Oh btw Im leaving the country soon......like tomorrow and wont be coming back. I have a wife and kids in Puerto Rico.

  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    He says: I just got out of prison 3 months ago.........
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    Whats your blood type?
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    Does this fake mustache make my butt look big?
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    So...Are you up for checking out this Swingers Club I frequent?
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    How much do you weigh?
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    Oh... uhh... hmm... Yeah, I'll be right back. It was a shart.
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    Your pajama pants match your couch throw blanket. Laughs.
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    Want some candy, kids? Hop in my windowless van to see my puppy.
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    My ex was a pagan that turned from strait to lesbian, you don't like women too do you? You sure not even bi?
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    My alter ego or higher self is other-wordly and I come from another planet. I think we are twin flames! .................

    Want to astral to my starship?
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    I brought my kids along to meet you. Kids, say "hi" to your new daddy.
  • TheCounselorx
    TheCounselorx Posts: 1,182 Member
    do you have a sister?
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    I had a dream before we met that we died as deep lovers and came back into this world in the now only to meet again.
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  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    Show me on the doll where I can touch you. :|
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    Is it ok that I brought my dog?
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    Is it ok that I can have your leftovers for my dog?
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    You look just like my ex, God rest his soul -- that b@st@rd's look could make anyone kill.
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    Is this a five condom night? Winks.....
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    I got a dozen condoms and a bottle of Gatorade -- it is important to set goals.
  • KrazyLeeLee
    KrazyLeeLee Posts: 2,885 Member
    They say mental attacks are growing less frequent...
  • SAMURR9094
    SAMURR9094 Posts: 33 Member
    If you just lost a few pounds here and here then youd be more than a 7.
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    Are those things real?
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