Is it appropriate for my boyfriend to ask me to pay him to live with him?

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  • kayjaybee357
    kayjaybee357 Posts: 8 Member
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    If you are living together, it would make sense for both of you to share the expenses such as rent, utilities, etc...
  • elizarizo
    elizarizo Posts: 489 Member
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    If he asked you then he should pay, BUT I think you should contribute, for instance buy the groceries? Pay for the cable? For me I love to be able to contribute to something makes me feel better
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    Wait, OP, is he going to make you buy your own sausages too??

    I think that's where I'd draw the line.

    Otherwise, though, things seem perfectly fine with this relationship. Congrats!
  • kayjaybee357
    kayjaybee357 Posts: 8 Member
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    You need to clarify with him exactly what he means by you have to pay him to live with him. Maybe he isn't wording it properly or isn't being very clear.
  • Just_Mel_
    Just_Mel_ Posts: 3,992 Member
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    silkmouse wrote: »
    tinak33 wrote: »
    Yeah.... how long have you been dating? Maybe ask him if he means splitting the rent and living together? I'm gonna back out of this now. I'm soooo not qualified to give any relationship advice. :#:D Way too cynical. hahaha

    Please don't laugh but we've only been together for 3 weeks, we are both emotional people. And by the way the reason I am so broke now is that he spent a loooot of my money, I didn't even keep track....so I'm not using him at all!

    What kind of stuff did he buy with your money? How long did you know him before you handed him your credit card?
  • WhereIsPJSoles
    WhereIsPJSoles Posts: 622 Member
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    odusgolp wrote: »
    Wait, OP, is he going to make you buy your own sausages too??

    I think that's where I'd draw the line.

    Otherwise, though, things seem perfectly fine with this relationship. Congrats!

    Wow, you just expect free sausage in a relationship? Bold.

  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
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    200w.gif
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,472 Member
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    I am here with popcorn/
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    WhereIsPJSoles wrote: »
    odusgolp wrote: »
    Wait, OP, is he going to make you buy your own sausages too??

    I think that's where I'd draw the line.

    Otherwise, though, things seem perfectly fine with this relationship. Congrats!

    Wow, you just expect free sausage in a relationship? Bold.

    You have a point... Perhaps this is why I'm single. Too damn demanding.
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    200w.gif

    Hey! It's T.C. form the hit TV show Magnum P.I.

    @caco_ethes

    Unofficial Humorist
    Under Water Laser Tag Enthusiast
    Volunteer Puppy Walker
    Professional Expert of Expertise
  • BABetter1
    BABetter1 Posts: 618 Member
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    When a serious boyfriend of mine noticed that I really struggled paycheck to paycheck as a single parent paying big child support to my kids alleged "SAH dad" POS ex, he suggested I should move in with him. Our relationship was going great, and his very small, very old house was paid for. Still, I was reluctant to move in for multiple reasons. But, the boyfriend hounded me all the time about how great it was going to be, how much money I would save, no sense in maintaining two residences when we spent as much time together as we could anyway, etc. Like your boyfriend, there was no mention of paying at first. He had even mentioned the fact that since his home was paid for, I wouldn't have to pay rent. But, as soon as I agreed, gave my landlord notice, and started packing, he let me know that he had been talking to his family, and they were all really concerned that he might be taken advantage of. So, turned out he would need to have me pay most of the utility bills in lieu of rent. I paid gas, electric, phone, and cable. He paid his own water bill. It actually did save me a little money, though . . . . . . very little, much less than it saved him to be honest. But, I did end up marrying the guy, and we're still happily married. Is it possible that your boyfriend's family got to him about not letting you "take advantage" like mine did? Either way, he needs to clarify this situation. If he's simply suggesting you guys get a place and share expenses, he should make that clear. If he's implying something else, run. Run far and fast . . . . it'll burn a few calories too.
  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
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    silkmouse wrote: »
    Bottom line I just finished talking with my boyfriend and I told him point blank that I am not giving him a cent if he wants me to live with him. I also told him that if we get married I will not pay for food or anything else because he should take care of me and he said that he prefers it that way. I also told him that I am willing to clean and cook sometimes but he can't count on it. Right now we are still hanging out so I will get back to you guys later.

    You’re my dream girl
  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
    edited January 2018
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    t

  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
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    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    silkmouse wrote: »
    Bottom line I just finished talking with my boyfriend and I told him point blank that I am not giving him a cent if he wants me to live with him. I also told him that if we get married I will not pay for food or anything else because he should take care of me and he said that he prefers it that way. I also told him that I am willing to clean and cook sometimes but he can't count on it. Right now we are still hanging out so I will get back to you guys later.

    You’re my dream girl

    What cook and clean sometimes? No way if I'm paying it better be like little house on the prairie woman!
  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
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  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    silkmouse wrote: »
    Bottom line I just finished talking with my boyfriend and I told him point blank that I am not giving him a cent if he wants me to live with him. I also told him that if we get married I will not pay for food or anything else because he should take care of me and he said that he prefers it that way. I also told him that I am willing to clean and cook sometimes but he can't count on it. Right now we are still hanging out so I will get back to you guys later.

    It's about time someone upped their game on the forums.

  • emjay6x3
    emjay6x3 Posts: 213 Member
    edited January 2018
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    silkmouse wrote: »
    Bottom line I just finished talking with my boyfriend and I told him point blank that I am not giving him a cent if he wants me to live with him. I also told him that if we get married I will not pay for food or anything else because he should take care of me and he said that he prefers it that way. I also told him that I am willing to clean and cook sometimes but he can't count on it. Right now we are still hanging out so I will get back to you guys later.

    WTF. "Don't count on me being helpful at all in this relationship" - and he's still talking to you?!
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    silkmouse wrote: »
    Bottom line I just finished talking with my boyfriend and I told him point blank that I am not giving him a cent if he wants me to live with him. I also told him that if we get married I will not pay for food or anything else because he should take care of me and he said that he prefers it that way. I also told him that I am willing to clean and cook sometimes but he can't count on it. Right now we are still hanging out so I will get back to you guys later.

    You’re my dream girl

    original.gif
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