Less Alcohol- May 2018- One Day at a Time
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »trishfit2014 wrote: »So my kids know I am giving up drinking for now. My son wanted to go to a restaurant on Mother’s Day and told me they had half price margaritas on Mother’s day (not sure why he knew that). I told him I was not drinking and he told me I could cheat. Instead I went to a different location of the same restaurant that does not have a liquor license. We had a nice day but at the end I was a bit beat and my other son was hungry even though we ate at the restaurant at 4 (after having lunch already). I ended up at the grocery store tired and irritated at my son which would have been the perfect reason for wine especially since my son was encouraging me to cheat. I did not even think about it until today. Today is day 18 AF. Feeling better than I have in a long time.
Wonderful! You really stuck to it. 18 days and counting. I'm sure your brain is clearer and less mood swings. Do you feel you handle stress better being AF?
Happy the margaritas didn't lure you in. Xoxo
Yes Julie feeling so less stressed. I was thinking I would have been screaming at the kids last night (last minute school needs had me running all over town). I got it done maybe not with a smile but no screaming. Life is so much better.5 -
There's something that I've been wanting to share with you all for the last 4 days. Friday night, I saw the Alcohol Devil. Yes, I did. Sure as anything.
After our long stressful week at work, we (co-workers) went for a late lunch at 4 pm. To call it a day. Most had alcohol. I did too. 3 low cal/alc beers which I'm ok with. Some people ate and drank and then left in a reasonable amount of time. There were several guys that were still hanging out deciding on having another. I was finishing up and asking for my check, so I still had enough time to witness everything. We were all talking and laughing. The young man across from me at the beginning of the night was saying how he needed to get home to his wife as they were going away for the weekend (he was adamant at that point). The guys finished their drinks and then they were deciding if they needed/wanted another. The young man was the other two guys' ride. "Do you want another?" "It's up to you, you're our ride." ... and back and forth. This is where it gets freaky. I almost saw the A.D. lean his arm around the young man's shoulders and whisper into his ear. I could see the internal struggle on the young man's face. And then his whole body did a slump of resign, and he said, "yeah, let's have another", quietly.
I couldn't watch anymore. I had to go. I felt like the A.D. had claimed another. And the self realization part was, how many times had that been me when I was younger? And maybe not in a bar, but more recently?
This thread has helped me to open my eyes. I feel like a veil has lifted and I can see things more clearly. I may not always be able to control them, but I am definitely more aware.
This is really interesting observation. It is the alcohol devil in disguise who whispers in our ears. The other man knew he should go home to his wife. But instead he stayed too long and probably had a headache and missed the fun of packing with is wife and getting ready. I love your storytelling because I could picture it in my mind.
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I agree with @julieal1969 about @Leeg5656 's story.
On a personal note:
I don't have anything really interesting to report other than I am happy I don't have anything really interesting to report.8 -
Hello! I’m starting late but starting my moderation journey as well. Planning to stick to only F, Sat and Sun for weight loss and over all health.7
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26 days AF. I am trying for 30 days and last night was really difficult. Went out to dinner for date night and on the way there I knew I was feeling tempted. I told my husband I was feeling tempted and explained that some of the people in the group just moderate and next thing I knew I almost had myself talked into having a drink. But when the waitress asked if we would like a beer or a margarita I asked for an iced tea. I am too close to 30 to have to start over now.13
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26 days AF. I am trying for 30 days and last night was really difficult. Went out to dinner for date night and on the way there I knew I was feeling tempted. I told my husband I was feeling tempted and explained that some of the people in the group just moderate and next thing I knew I almost had myself talked into having a drink. But when the waitress asked if we would like a beer or a margarita I asked for an iced tea. I am too close to 30 to have to start over now.
Bravo!!! You can do it! It will fill you with such pride. So happy you asked for tea.
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My week: My MIL was diagnosed with bone cancer. We are about to put our house on the market. We have already purchased another home and go to settlement June 7. My youngest daughter summoned us to California (we live in Maryland) as she is about to move to London and we will fly there tomorrow. My oldest daughter is here, is 9 months pregnant and has a toddler, and needs us too. I would appreciate any that pray to ask, "please offer Jennifer some relief from her stress." Thank you, my friends.17
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My week: My MIL was diagnosed with bone cancer. We are about to put our house on the market. We have already purchased another home and go to settlement June 7. My youngest daughter summoned us to California (we live in Maryland) as she is about to move to London and we will fly there tomorrow. My oldest daughter is here, is 9 months pregnant and has a toddler, and needs us too. I would appreciate any that pray to ask, "please offer Jennifer some relief from her stress." Thank you, my friends.
Done
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@donimfp Thank you. I do hope it is somewhat relaxing and I can put the rest on the back burner for a couple of days.3
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@JenT304 What a day! Prayers are heading your way.4
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My week: My MIL was diagnosed with bone cancer. We are about to put our house on the market. We have already purchased another home and go to settlement June 7. My youngest daughter summoned us to California (we live in Maryland) as she is about to move to London and we will fly there tomorrow. My oldest daughter is here, is 9 months pregnant and has a toddler, and needs us too. I would appreciate any that pray to ask, "please offer Jennifer some relief from her stress." Thank you, my friends.
You have it my friend. Take care of yourself the best that you can. xo3 -
I've been sober for over 10 years, but I still enjoy reading through this thread. There are still the rare moments where I want to drink, and I know that's probably not a very encouraging thing to say. But good luck to all of you that are trying to cut back or quit all together!9
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Annalee82_ wrote: »I've been sober for over 10 years, but I still enjoy reading through this thread. There are still the rare moments where I want to drink, and I know that's probably not a very encouraging thing to say. But good luck to all of you that are trying to cut back or quit all together!
It is encouraging actually. Rare is a good thing. Gone for good is unrealistic I think.
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@Annalee82_ Thanks for your input. So happy for your ten years. Xo3
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Nothing new to report here. Just stabilized in a way. I plan on not drinking until I want one or two drinks. And then I will. I think I can do this thing. I woke up after a dream where I drank a huge glass of wine. I then remembered that I didn't have any wine. And I felt so happy. The best part of my morning is when I wake up and feel no hangover or ill effects.6
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I’m in. 54 days sober today. Committed to staying sober for May. I want to make more of an effort to check in here, great support8
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Well although its now mid may...I have decided to quit alcohol for good! I have came to the point thats its affecting prettt much every aspect of my life. I need to take control again.7
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Well although its now mid may...I have decided to quit alcohol for good! I have came to the point thats its affecting prettt much every aspect of my life. I need to take control again.
Welcome. It doesn't matter when you start in this thread. Even for people who are wanting to complete the month of May alcohol free this is still a personal day to day challenge and sometimes a moment to moment challenge.
If you would like Julie, our hostess, is usually here at least once a day and she can provide some helpful links for your journey. Just say the word.3 -
Well although its now mid may...I have decided to quit alcohol for good! I have came to the point thats its affecting prettt much every aspect of my life. I need to take control again.
Like @NovusDies says so aptly, just lean on us for anything you need. We have all been there at the start and have some great tips to share. Make it through ten days Alcohol Free and you will be feeling so good!
Annie Grace (This Naked Mind author) has a free 30 day program on her website called the 30 day experiment. You can join even anonymously and you get a facebook type page for you to post on your wall. But the whole site is only for people who join (and it's not on facebook).
Also, arm yourself with alternatives: tea, find some mocktails, for those cravings. They say cravings last for 6 minutes so you need to find something to do for that six minutes.
One last thing, for the die hard who really wants to quit, go to youtube and check out the videos by Craig Beck; he scares you straight about alcohol. He also has a program you can join.
Find some books to read; treat this like a college class. You will put in a lot of work but you can do it.
We are here for you; we care about you. Check in with us when you have time and let us know what you need! xo5 -
Hey friends! Let's resurrect some titles of books for our new friends to read. What book titles were your favorites?
Have a wonderful day!2 -
Trinkwasser wrote: »I’m in. 54 days sober today. Committed to staying sober for May. I want to make more of an effort to check in here, great support
Awesome job! You are amazing and strong!1 -
About resources, This Naked Mind is by far the most helpful book I've read. Also, Kate at The Sober School has a weekly (Monday) blog that I always find helpful and inspiring. She also offers a pricey 6-week course, but signing up for the blog is free. I learned the term "Hangziety" from her blog and also the idea that "Sobriety delivers what alcohol (falsely) promises."
Best wishes to everyone on this journey!2 -
Re: Resources-“Waiting: A Nonbeliever’s Higher Power” by Marya Hornbacher is an excellent book. It’s somewhat geared towards agnostics in Alcoholics Anonymous, and talks about the difference between spirituality and religion, but the focus is not really on AA, but the bankrupt experience of being an alcoholic and finding hope. I think she’s an incredible writer, it’s a very personal story, and anyone trying to get sober would benefit from reading it. Highly recommend it.2
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Has anyone read Drink: The Intimate Relationship Between Women and Alcohol?2
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lilann1961 wrote: »Has anyone read Drink: The Intimate Relationship Between Women and Alcohol?
I haven't. But will add that to my own list. xo1 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »lilann1961 wrote: »Has anyone read Drink: The Intimate Relationship Between Women and Alcohol?
I haven't. But will add that to my own list. xo
I have ordered it from Barnes and Noble. Will let everyone know what I think!3 -
Having a much easier time the past few days -- I'm feeling very self-motivated instead of being motivated by external, less important factors. This could change at any time, but I'm really enjoying the feeling for as long as it decides to stick around.6
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