Serial Starters
Replies
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Dawn, I can empathize. At various points in my family history, something similar has happened and the recriminations lasted for decades. It serves no purpose and is only making the grieving process more intense for your Gma, your Mom and you. I’m so sorry.
Kindly,
Tess2 -
Tess - thank you. I always looked up to my Aunt and Uncle, growing up. Now, I'm having a hard time even believing we're related. I know, sickness and death can bring out the best and worst of people. I honestly, hoped it would bring us all together. Instead, we're all further apart than we have ever been.
Thanks again...2 -
arniedog74 wrote: »Wow...I fell at work yesterday... on concrete floor, of course... boy, my body is screaming at me, today... miss the days of bouncing right back..hehe
My mom's oldest brother and sister are trying to cause more grief and I really just want to yell at them.. because of them, my Gma is upset with my Mom, because she took Gpa out of the hospital at his last stay. Gpa was upset, didn't want to be there and it was going to be bad. They have Gma convinced, if he stayed they would have been able to "make him better" when, in all reality, they would have prolonged his suffering and it would have been worse than what he had to deal with. Not one person in my family understands or wants to accept that he had this horrible disease. I don't want to. But, I had to. I read about the disease and it is definitely what he had. They don't want to accept things. There's no point in causing issues. No one wants him to be gone. But, him being here, we were all wishing the suffering would end.
Sorry for being a downer. It's just been getting to me. It's so hard to believe how horrible my family truly is.
Dawn, this is difficult stuff for people to handle, and some do it badly.
Hospital stays are rough on young, "healthy" people. You get no meaningful sleep when you are there. Now, give this horrible situation to an elderly person, such as my father or your grandfather, and things get worse by an order of magnitude: the lack of good sleep opens the door for dilirium to step right in. Stress goes way up, and It stinks.
Some people just cannot accept big life events. They need to place blame. They don't know any better. That's how they are. They cultivate resentment, and this behavior extends their own pain, maybe increasing it. It pollutes the grieving process, delaying healing.
Hang in there. When people put their minds to this behavior, nothing short of a lightning strike will change their minds. I am sorry for what your mother has to go through her siblings; encourage her to not engage with their anger or bad behavior.
Big hugs,
Lana1 -
Happy Sunday, all!
It's been a busy weekend. Went to a local animal society event yesterday and came home with a puppy - so that's kept us pretty busy.
Still eating well and got a workout in yesterday.
It's been gloomy and rainy off and on so we've been mostly staying indoors and doing some house work.
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Eryn-What kind of puppy? I used to work at an animal rescue... I'm all about animals and adoption... congrats to you on the new addition to the family...0
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Lana - you said it perfectly... I've always noticed this in my Aunt, she has to be center of attention... my Uncle, I saw a glimpse, a few years ago with a situation with then wife...I saw it fully when he said, "I'm not putting my life on hold to take care of him" "Him" being his father. I think part of the reason Mom has wanted me there for so much, she is afraid she'll say something she shouldn't and, be less likely if I'm there...she has pretty much cut ties with both of them. She is ok with it and I encourage it. She deserves to have the peace as does Grandma.
Thank you so much Lana
Hugs to you1 -
MONDAY
Good morning, back to the workplace, blech.
Weight up, but then I at least got on the scale and will work on it.
Dawn/ Lana - Thank you Lana, I wasnt sure how to answer Dawn - death brings out the worst traits in people and they act like they are still in diapers. Why people get angry about the past, like doing so can change it?? Sounds like you are on the less dysfunctional side of the family, be grateful.
Left my enchiladas out overnight and what a pain as that was lunches, but oh well. I can buy salads at the cafe. I just threw them out and saw that I had given myself double portions - ha!! not good, but I did find a single enchilada in the freezer, so there is one meal.... Just shaking my head.
Will lurk from work.1 -
arniedog74 wrote: »Eryn-What kind of puppy? I used to work at an animal rescue... I'm all about animals and adoption... congrats to you on the new addition to the family...
The puppy is some sort of Staffordshire terrier mix! Mom was a smaller, 40 lb staffie but they don't know who the Dad was. I guess the Mom was abandoned and they took her in and discovered she was pregnant! I love animals too. This is dog #3. Hahaha
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Happy Monday all!
Not really thrilled about Monday being here and being back in the office, but what can you do?
A bit tired this morning but doing ok! Had a nice loss last week and have been doing really well with eating. Need to get some exercise in after work, and definitely try bed earlier tonight.
Hope all are doing well! I'll be lurking as well. 2 -
Joining the lurkers! Very crowded in the lurking corner.
I overindulged in food and alcohol this weekend, but only went up one lb. Back to the gym today and will try to bring focus back. Did meal prep yesterday, so lunches are sorted.
Happy Monday to all!
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arniedog74 wrote: »Eryn-What kind of puppy? I used to work at an animal rescue... I'm all about animals and adoption... congrats to you on the new addition to the family...
The puppy is some sort of Staffordshire terrier mix! Mom was a smaller, 40 lb staffie but they don't know who the Dad was. I guess the Mom was abandoned and they took her in and discovered she was pregnant! I love animals too. This is dog #3. Hahaha
What a face! Good thing they got the momma and she had the pups there. Congrats again... such a cutie!2 -
Sara- thank you. I appreciate you and everyone in this group. Somehow, I got lucky with my side of fam. Mom wants to say things, I wanna say things, but we've got pretty good at just letting it go. I even stopped mom from sending a text to her sister, because I knew it would cause issues. Sadly, once Gma passes, I don't think we'll have anything to do with those two. At this point, I don't feel like that is a bad decision at all.0
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Hi All
Checking in.
Eryn Such a sweet face your new puppy has!
I never did find a scale in the fitness center. Looking forward to being home, oddly.
Wednesday—back in NYC.
Bringing back several Cabana Boy candidates for Sara to interview/audition.
Lana3 -
Lana!! I love good news! Thank you for thinking of me...... Wow- you did have a good time!
My goal for the summer is to walk 10- 15 minutes after dinner to add more steps in and be less of a couch potato. I will mark my calendar (paper) with a w when I do, thinking of rewards if I behave.1 -
Sara - your after dinner walking plan sounds good! Would you like a partner? I could use an after dinner walk every day; not too long, just enough. Have you started already or is it tomorrow/Tuesday or when?
I have a paper calendar too!
Bidding sweet dreams to all~~
Lana1 -
TUESDAY
Good morning,
Got second box of books yesterday at mailbox so I couldnt wander around with hands full, maybe more walking tonight. I started Sunday sort of by accident but you can start whenever you want. It is about a 5-10 minute walk.
Hottest day today/tomorrow? They cant decide and air quality is marginal so windows are closed but ceiling fan is on. Dog with allergies is drinking more water, so out we go in the middle of night for a pit stop.
Eryn, thank you for posting dog #3. What a face.
Stay cool and hydrated. Wave to all who follow.2 -
Finally got some much needed rain and woke to nice cool weather. Going to attempt a walk at lunch... no Sun so shouldn't be too bad...2
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Hi all,
I did pretty good on my after work dog walks last week, however this week is not looking too promising. Rained yesterday so we stayed home (I couldn't let my poor little Mocha melt) & dinner with BF's family tonight. Oh well try for tomorrow!
Dawn~so sorry about the family drama, I have noticed when my Gpa passed away the family kind of separated & since my mom passed
I hardly even talk to any of them (I don't mind too much as there is less stress & less drama this way). I hope you didn't hurt anything when you fell.
Lana~hope you are enjoying your cruise & don't worry about the scale, just have fun!
Eryn~OMG I want to take your puppy home, such a gorgeous little face & those eyes awe such a cutie ...Congrats on your new addition.
Twiley~Don't worry about over indulging on food & alcohol as I do it every weekend....hahaha (vicious little cycle
)
**Waving to Sara, Tess, Kathryn, and anyone else who stops by**
~Saltine~ 3 -
Virtual run around the cubicles at work, I have ZERO claims in my "headache" file. Gee how many calories are burned in a virtual run??
Lana - hope your trip back home is a good one.2 -
I am alone at the office this week and finding it very difficult to not just eat my way through the day. Today I am doing better than yesterday as I have used the time to do some exercises. Another 5 days of this.1
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Snowflake1968 wrote: »I am alone at the office this week and finding it very difficult to not just eat my way through the day. Today I am doing better than yesterday as I have used the time to do some exercises. Another 5 days of this.
Sounds like your spending time to do exercises is a good compromise. Can you take walking breaks?1 -
Tilliesmommy1 wrote: »Snowflake1968 wrote: »I am alone at the office this week and finding it very difficult to not just eat my way through the day. Today I am doing better than yesterday as I have used the time to do some exercises. Another 5 days of this.
Sounds like your spending time to do exercises is a good compromise. Can you take walking breaks?
I can except we are having wind gusts up to 90km/hr yesterday and today. Yesterday included rain with it LOL It's supposed to be nice tomorrow, so hopefully.1 -
Good evening,
Tomorrow is our Summer Event at work, free lunch. Actually heard someone pick it apart verbally - such gratitude I tell you.
3 days walking - 2 days straight of vegetarian lunch ( tomorrow and Thursday will be meat just happened that way and Friday is up for grabs still). Only walk 5-10 minutes extra, but it puts me well over 30 minutes a day and is more than I used to do......
Stay cool and have a good night.2 -
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Saltine- I believe, once Gma passes, it will just be me and mom... maybe her younger brother... they may keep in touch through social media, but that will pass. I will be ok with that...too much drama for me...
Sara - yay on extra walking! I did get in a walk at lunch.. was a little warmer than I thought...I survived
Snowflake - good way to spend your alone time.0 -
WEDNESDAY
Good morning,
Dog got me up, yes it is early. Means potentially more sleep before dog walk.
Company lunch so my work this morning was almost nothing. My sandals are the highest heel I have worn in years and a couple of my toes are telling me. Just means I may have to wear them less often or find a way to deal with those 2 toes. I have worn flats for so long that 1.5 is a lot.....
Are you home Lana?
Have 4 baby hats waiting to be sewn up and a 5th almost done. #6 in this group was just started last night.
Babbling on. Wave to all who follow. Lurking with any luck.1 -
Happy Hump Day, all!
Thanks for the kind puppy comments.
Starting to get a little more sleep! Just need to continue to master our new routine, lol. I've been getting to bed too late.
I am a flats girl too! When I wear heels (like yesterday) my toes definitely don't appreciate it. It doesn't help that I have wide feet either, lol.
Hope all are doing well this morning! Need to get in my workout after work today and need to drink more water.
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Hello Everybody~~
It's good to be home, I must say.
I had only coffee and water this morning, and my scale said 241.4. I don't like seeing the 240s again, but I am very grateful that I gained only 3 pounds. Years ago, when I ate with great abandon on cruises, I would gain 7 to 10 pounds, so 3 is pretty good!
Time for a nap. Walking later on. BBL.
Lana
241.4 today
250.0 highest
185.0 goal2 -
I wear flats more often than not too, I do have a couple of pairs of heels I wear when I have to feel more professional but I change them after my meeting usually.
Another quiet day here at the office, thankfully the wind has died down and I will be able to go for a walk today. I have cleaned the front desk and organized it. Going to vacuum and clean the bathroom in a bit. Also need to clean the windows in the entrance. I don't know what these guys all do when I leave, but it's certainly not cleaning.
Today is my 31st Wedding Anniversary, no big plans at all but it feels like a massive accomplishment LOL
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Snowflake1968 wrote: »I wear flats more often than not too, I do have a couple of pairs of heels I wear when I have to feel more professional but I change them after my meeting usually.
Another quiet day here at the office, thankfully the wind has died down and I will be able to go for a walk today. I have cleaned the front desk and organized it. Going to vacuum and clean the bathroom in a bit. Also need to clean the windows in the entrance. I don't know what these guys all do when I leave, but it's certainly not cleaning.
Today is my 31st Wedding Anniversary, no big plans at all but it feels like a massive accomplishment LOL
Happy Anniversary!!!!
Lana
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