Minimalists Unite
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Cakey, as a minimalist and having all your possessions destroyed must have given you a new perspective too, of what to keep and enjoy and what is irreplaceable and to treasure (baby photos, kid art, etc)1
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Motorsheen wrote: »@caco_ethes
So... what is a reasonable number of shoes for a fella to own ?
( I'm including dress shoes, trainers, casual kicks etc. )
I just had this same conversation this weekend with some family members.
For the record, I thought their replies and estimations were ridiculously low.
However many makes a guy happy 😅1 -
Motorsheen wrote: »@caco_ethes
So... what is a reasonable number of shoes for a fella to own ?
( I'm including dress shoes, trainers, casual kicks etc. )
I just had this same conversation this weekend with some family members.
For the record, I thought their replies and estimations were ridiculously low.
How many do you have? Curious 'cause I am a self proclaimed shoe hoarder
Will count mine and let you know0 -
Motorsheen wrote: »@caco_ethes
So... what is a reasonable number of shoes for a fella to own ?
( I'm including dress shoes, trainers, casual kicks etc. )
I just had this same conversation this weekend with some family members.
For the record, I thought their replies and estimations were ridiculously low.
How many do you have? Curious 'cause I am a self proclaimed shoe hoarder
Will count mine and let you know
well......0 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »@caco_ethes
So... what is a reasonable number of shoes for a fella to own ?
( I'm including dress shoes, trainers, casual kicks etc. )
I just had this same conversation this weekend with some family members.
For the record, I thought their replies and estimations were ridiculously low.
However many makes a guy happy 😅
Right Answer!
Cole Haan website, here I come !1 -
Cakey, as a minimalist and having all your possessions destroyed must have given you a new perspective too, of what to keep and enjoy and what is irreplaceable and to treasure (baby photos, kid art, etc)
The fire was actually uniquely satisfying in that i was able to be rid of things I didn’t feel able to get rid of before, not because I didn’t want to get rid of them but because they didn’t belong to me and I didn’t feel permitted. We had bought the house from his grandma and she left tons and tons of things there. We never really felt we could throw them out. In fact when the house burned, she was more emotional about it than we were and grieved openly for weeks for the things she lost. I felt terrible that she felt that way but it was a freedom for me I didn’t think I’d ever get to experience.
Losing my own mementos made me realize that i had actually been holding onto some things simply because it was a societal norm or I worried what people would think if i admitted to throwing things out. Which is silly. I wasn’t consciously aware that i felt that way. So losing my wedding dress and any school things i still had was also satisfying in a way.
But i find it incredibly hard to explain to people so i just sorta played the part of the sad homeowner for a while afterwards.5 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Cakey, as a minimalist and having all your possessions destroyed must have given you a new perspective too, of what to keep and enjoy and what is irreplaceable and to treasure (baby photos, kid art, etc)
The fire was actually uniquely satisfying in that i was able to be rid of things I didn’t feel able to get rid of before, not because I didn’t want to get rid of them but because they didn’t belong to me and I didn’t feel permitted. We had bought the house from his grandma and she left tons and tons of things there. We never really felt we could throw them out. In fact when the house burned, she was more emotional about it than we were and grieved openly for weeks for the things she lost. I felt terrible that she felt that way but it was a freedom for me I didn’t think I’d ever get to experience.
Losing my own mementos made me realize that i had actually been holding onto some things simply because it was a societal norm or I worried what people would think if i admitted to throwing things out. Which is silly. I wasn’t consciously aware that i felt that way. So losing my wedding dress and any school things i still had was also satisfying in a way.
But i find it incredibly hard to explain to people so i just sorta played the part of the sad homeowner for a while afterwards.
I love your candid honesty...know that
Something I've always really noticed in you and greatly appreciate2 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Cakey, as a minimalist and having all your possessions destroyed must have given you a new perspective too, of what to keep and enjoy and what is irreplaceable and to treasure (baby photos, kid art, etc)
The fire was actually uniquely satisfying in that i was able to be rid of things I didn’t feel able to get rid of before, not because I didn’t want to get rid of them but because they didn’t belong to me and I didn’t feel permitted. We had bought the house from his grandma and she left tons and tons of things there. We never really felt we could throw them out. In fact when the house burned, she was more emotional about it than we were and grieved openly for weeks for the things she lost. I felt terrible that she felt that way but it was a freedom for me I didn’t think I’d ever get to experience.
Losing my own mementos made me realize that i had actually been holding onto some things simply because it was a societal norm or I worried what people would think if i admitted to throwing things out. Which is silly. I wasn’t consciously aware that i felt that way. So losing my wedding dress and any school things i still had was also satisfying in a way.
But i find it incredibly hard to explain to people so i just sorta played the part of the sad homeowner for a while afterwards.
I love your candid honesty...know that
Something I've always really noticed in you and greatly appreciate
Likewise!1 -
I feel like an alien sometimes when my colleagues talk about their dream car and house. I don’t even care about any of that. I dunno if it’s because I’m incredibly jaded or just a minimalist.
Attachment and desire are at the root of suffering.2 -
Once you obtain your fancy car sure it will give you joy but at what point does that novelty wear off and it just becomes a normal car again.3
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I once saw this show about past lotto winners...
They interviewed this guy who won the lottery and asked him... "So does money buy happiness?"
He replied... "*kitten* yeaahh" 😂4 -
Mr_Healthy_Habits wrote: »I once saw this show about past lotto winners...
They interviewed this guy who won the lottery and asked him... "So does money buy happiness?"
He replied... "*kitten* yeaahh" 😂
I still think winning the lotto is a cop out. Let’s go back to the car situation...say that you have wanted this dream car and you saved and worked your *kitten* of to get it, isn’t that what makes it so much better. If it’s just given to you for doing nothing what’s the gratification in that?0 -
amorfati601070 wrote: »Mr_Healthy_Habits wrote: »I once saw this show about past lotto winners...
They interviewed this guy who won the lottery and asked him... "So does money buy happiness?"
He replied... "*kitten* yeaahh" 😂
I still think winning the lotto is a cop out. Let’s go back to the car situation...say that you have wanted this dream car and you saved and worked your *kitten* of to get it, isn’t that what makes it so much better. If it’s just given to you for doing nothing what’s the gratification in that?
The fact that your not broke after buying it 🤷🏽♂️😂...
But I get what you're saying brother... Better to earn something then have it given to you.
I've never been the type to take anything from anyone but if I won a car, I'm not going to be to proud to take it...1 -
Motorsheen wrote: »@caco_ethes
So... what is a reasonable number of shoes for a fella to own ?
( I'm including dress shoes, trainers, casual kicks etc. )
I just had this same conversation this weekend with some family members.
For the record, I thought their replies and estimations were ridiculously low.
I had over 300 pair, including flip flops and house shoes, mostly cheap flip flops. And old ones, so old I was afraid to wear them. Wasn’t saving them, just never threw any away. Pared them down to about 100. Made it easy to see that I wear the same 3 or 4 pair 90% of the time.1 -
laprimaJenny wrote: »Mr_Healthy_Habits wrote: »I once saw this show about past lotto winners...
They interviewed this guy who won the lottery and asked him... "So does money buy happiness?"
He replied... "*kitten* yeaahh" 😂
This makes me wonder what a minimalist would do if they won a *kitten* load of money?!
I mean in theory I would love to say I would build a home, buy a responsible car such as a Ford Escape for my family and pay off any outstanding accounts. Finally I would invest a small amount to each of my children’s savings account. Whatever is left over, ideally, I would love to give it to charity. Perhaps that sounds like a lot, but that would cover the minimal in my perspective.
The reality is, I would find that extremely hard to do. I would always want something more. Whether it’s a new television or fridge. There’s always something I wouldn’t mind to replace or update.
It’s definitely a mind provoking subject for me. Considering I grew up poor, I have always strived for more. I realize that money and/or material isn’t everything, but I would be lying to myself if I didn’t value it in some way.
I do commend the minimalist mindset. I wish I had that kind of discipline.
My plan is to get out of debt, set up a trust fund for my nephews and parents, and then start my plan to take out the electric company. Basically I'll buy a house, remodel it, take it off the electric grid, and sell it for a marginal profit. Keep doing this as long as I can.
Or I'll just retire to a first world country that has affordable healthcare for saxons and danes.
As for minimalist I'm not there but slowly getting rid of stuff. I was a bit upset the ex didn't take more with her when she left but the Uhaul and her escape was full. Just need to get moving and take stuff to recycling and generally clean out things I don't need/use (like the living room furniture that's stupidly uncomfortable.)3 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Cakey, as a minimalist and having all your possessions destroyed must have given you a new perspective too, of what to keep and enjoy and what is irreplaceable and to treasure (baby photos, kid art, etc)
The fire was actually uniquely satisfying in that i was able to be rid of things I didn’t feel able to get rid of before, not because I didn’t want to get rid of them but because they didn’t belong to me and I didn’t feel permitted. We had bought the house from his grandma and she left tons and tons of things there. We never really felt we could throw them out. In fact when the house burned, she was more emotional about it than we were and grieved openly for weeks for the things she lost. I felt terrible that she felt that way but it was a freedom for me I didn’t think I’d ever get to experience.
Losing my own mementos made me realize that i had actually been holding onto some things simply because it was a societal norm or I worried what people would think if i admitted to throwing things out. Which is silly. I wasn’t consciously aware that i felt that way. So losing my wedding dress and any school things i still had was also satisfying in a way.
But i find it incredibly hard to explain to people so i just sorta played the part of the sad homeowner for a while afterwards.
This ^ was so interesting to me and somewhat relatable, as well. When I lost all of my stuff in a tornado, I was genuinely sad about a lot of it. So in that way I met the societal expectations...I have cried recently (7 years later) about missing my school yearbooks, for example! But I felt a bit ashamed that I was more attached to a few silly non-sentimental things (I had collected all of my utensils & small appliances in a very specific shade of yellow that was not easy to locate) and not remotely bothered by others (my then-husband's grandmother's wedding rings or toys from my babyhood that I never remembered playing with).
I find that after that experience, I'm much more likely to have a bit of (subconscious usually) contempt for others being super attached to their material things. I don't like this about myself, but that's how it has become. When someone experiences damage or theft of a few items, I always think "hmm, could have been everything, though". I'm not the sort of person who would say that to them! But I do think it. I think disasters change people, period, but in different ways.3 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »We'e retiring next year and moving to Vegas. We have lived in the same home for over 30 years. We have accumulated a lot of "stuff". We are doing our very best to not buy anything new in the next 16 months, but using up and/or getting rid of the "stuff" we have is a definite challenge.
@TheRoadDog Gratz!
I retire April 30, 2019. I am NOT a minimalist, nor am I a hoarder. I am (for me) comfortably between the two extremes. I worked hard to get the things I have and we have a lot of toys with no plans of downsizing. In fact with retirement on the horizon, plan on getting a small travel trailer and visit all of the national parks in the continental USA (retirement bucket list). Wife and I bought our current house in 2004 knowing that it was going to be our retirement house.2 -
Mr_Healthy_Habits wrote: »I once saw this show about past lotto winners...
They interviewed this guy who won the lottery and asked him... "So does money buy happiness?"
He replied... "*kitten* yeaahh" 😂
A lot of people regret winning the lottery though:
https://www.businessinsider.com/lottery-winners-lost-everything-2017-8
If I won, I would get laser hair removal, buy a normal house in my current town large enough for my family to live in and retrofit it to run on 100% renewables, get a new (electric) car because our family cars are close to 15 years old, save and invest enough to be set for life, and donate a lot of it.1 -
If I won the lottery (depending on how much, I'm talking big win), I do the usual, pay all my debt and for family and friends.
Get rid off all my stuff, quit job and travel until I got bored.
Then I'd work again at many different jobs to experience new things and learn new skills. I'd only stay as long as suited me, then move on.2 -
amorfati601070 wrote: »I feel like an alien sometimes when my colleagues talk about their dream car and house. I don’t even care about any of that. I dunno if it’s because I’m incredibly jaded or just a minimalist.
Attachment and desire are at the root of suffering.
I'll disagree with the house aspect. Mostly because my "dream house" is a minimalistic design that is what I have been planning for a number of years. It's smaller in size, easy to maintain and minimal annual costs in terms of heating, cooling, etc.
Unlike a car, property and houses generally go up in value. Also, as one gets older, they shouldn't have mortgage or rent payments so as to keep expenses low while on a fixed income.0
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