Is this guy just super friendly or is he asking me out?

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Replies

  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    So was the first guy. You just pushed him away.

    I talked to him on the phone the other night for TWO hours and he called at like 9:20 when I was ready for bed... how is that pushing him away? If he were interested, he would be like "Hey girl. I like you."

    This is still sarcasm right?

    I'm just saying... I'm not shutting him down. He wouldn't continue calling if I did. Just because I didn't go to certain events with him doesn't mean I squashed whatever was there. We still hung out other times.

    And him calling doesn't automatically equate to him being interested in more than friendship. I talk to many of my friends on a weekly basis.

    How many of them are hetero and male?
    :D:D Okay... so none... but there is one other guy who texts me on a regular basis and is just a friend.
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,860 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    Well I love you too.
    Can we be "friends?"

    Are you someone else's husband? Other people's husbands don't make good "friends."

    That's absurd. I am married and I have tons of friends here. If being married means I cannot send unsolicited newdie pics, what kind of a message does that send to children? If being married means I cannot mind the bishop while gazing upon a GMILF, what kind of a future are we leaving for the next generation.

    I put it to you, @breefoshee: isn't this an attack on all of humanity?

    Well, I don't know about you people, but I am not just going to sit around while this woman badmouths homosapiens!
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  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    So was the first guy. You just pushed him away.

    I talked to him on the phone the other night for TWO hours and he called at like 9:20 when I was ready for bed... how is that pushing him away? If he were interested, he would be like "Hey girl. I like you."

    This is still sarcasm right?

    I'm just saying... I'm not shutting him down. He wouldn't continue calling if I did. Just because I didn't go to certain events with him doesn't mean I squashed whatever was there. We still hung out other times.

    And him calling doesn't automatically equate to him being interested in more than friendship. I talk to many of my friends on a weekly basis.

    Well no of course not, shutting him down wouldn't keep him in the friend zone or still on the line.

    Um. Why am I the one keeping him on the line? Is he not keeping me on the line by continuing to call and not asking me out? I friendzoned him for my own mind's sake. It doesn't look any different than what we were doing before to him. I don't call him "bro" or talk about farts with him.
  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    Everyone THINKS they're being clear with what they want. Very few people actually are.

    Yeah, I mean subtlety and flirting are fun too up to a point.
    Y’know what I’d like? After a little back and forth banter -say a week- I’d like one party to say, “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m flirting with you. I like you. Shall we continue and move forward? Check yes or no.”

    YAS! Exactly.
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  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    I knew this was unnatural from the beginning.
  • This content has been removed.
  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    Everyone THINKS they're being clear with what they want. Very few people actually are.

    Yeah, I mean subtlety and flirting are fun too up to a point.
    Y’know what I’d like? After a little back and forth banter -say a week- I’d like one party to say, “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m flirting with you. I like you. Shall we continue and move forward? Check yes or no.”

    YAS! Exactly.

    I suppose technically you/I could be that party.,.

    But I don't wannnnna. I feel like it's the guy's job. I know it's 2019... but it's my choice. Just like it's his choice to wait for me to make the move.... and if I don't he's within his right to move on. I prefer a guy who pursues.
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  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    I knew this was unnatural from the beginning.
    That’s all you got? More please?

    I want to say more but I'm waiting for a warning to expire.
  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    So was the first guy. You just pushed him away.

    I talked to him on the phone the other night for TWO hours and he called at like 9:20 when I was ready for bed... how is that pushing him away? If he were interested, he would be like "Hey girl. I like you."

    This is still sarcasm right?

    I'm just saying... I'm not shutting him down. He wouldn't continue calling if I did. Just because I didn't go to certain events with him doesn't mean I squashed whatever was there. We still hung out other times.

    And him calling doesn't automatically equate to him being interested in more than friendship. I talk to many of my friends on a weekly basis.

    Well no of course not, shutting him down wouldn't keep him in the friend zone or still on the line.

    Um. Why am I the one keeping him on the line? Is he not keeping me on the line by continuing to call and not asking me out? I friendzoned him for my own mind's sake. It doesn't look any different than what we were doing before to him. I don't call him "bro" or talk about farts with him.

    I thought he asked you out all the time and that was the problem?
    Still, he invites me to thing after thing
    then he says "Well, let's hang out this weekend." But because I'm the most awkward person alive... I.... pause... because I don't want to say "yes" and it just be another big social event. And in the middle of my pause, he says " I mean.. you don't have to.. it's okay. "

    He's not asking me out... He's just inviting me to social events with his other friends. He's never been like "Lets go get dinner just us." That time he wanted to do something during the weekend did turn out to be just another friend's hangout.

    My problem was that I didn't know at the time if he was trying to have it mean more. Now that more time has passed, I see he is just a really outgoing, friendly guy.
  • SirMxyzptlk
    SirMxyzptlk Posts: 841 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    Well I love you too.
    Can we be "friends?"

    Are you someone else's husband? Other people's husbands don't make good "friends."

    If that is the deal breaker, then no.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    So was the first guy. You just pushed him away.

    I talked to him on the phone the other night for TWO hours and he called at like 9:20 when I was ready for bed... how is that pushing him away? If he were interested, he would be like "Hey girl. I like you."

    This is still sarcasm right?

    I'm just saying... I'm not shutting him down. He wouldn't continue calling if I did. Just because I didn't go to certain events with him doesn't mean I squashed whatever was there. We still hung out other times.

    And him calling doesn't automatically equate to him being interested in more than friendship. I talk to many of my friends on a weekly basis.

    Well no of course not, shutting him down wouldn't keep him in the friend zone or still on the line.

    Um. Why am I the one keeping him on the line? Is he not keeping me on the line by continuing to call and not asking me out? I friendzoned him for my own mind's sake. It doesn't look any different than what we were doing before to him. I don't call him "bro" or talk about farts with him.

    I thought he asked you out all the time and that was the problem?
    Still, he invites me to thing after thing
    then he says "Well, let's hang out this weekend." But because I'm the most awkward person alive... I.... pause... because I don't want to say "yes" and it just be another big social event. And in the middle of my pause, he says " I mean.. you don't have to.. it's okay. "

    He's not asking me out... He's just inviting me to social events with his other friends. He's never been like "Lets go get dinner just us." That time he wanted to do something during the weekend did turn out to be just another friend's hangout.

    My problem was that I didn't know at the time if he was trying to have it mean more. Now that more time has passed, I see he is just a really outgoing, friendly guy.

    I'd think that if he wanted more, he would have invited to go see a movie or something... but just the two of you. For sure.
  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    denny_mac wrote: »
    so which guy is NEXT on your check list?

    Tell us about him!

    I have this guy.... he accidentally made eye contact with me once.... When I stared back into his eyes.... he acted like he woke from up from a trance. Then he said the most *possibly* romantic thing... "Oh sorry, I spaced out." Then he quickly walked away.

    Does that mean he was so enamored with me that he was daydreaming of our future children... or was he actuallly spaced out? Did he run away quickly because he was so afraid of his love for me that he couldn't handle it? HALP guys!

    Spaced out. I do that too, lol.

    RIGHT?! "spaced out" pffft. He might as well put a ring on my finger with lines like that.

    What's funny to me is that your obvious sarcasm here doesn't sound much different than your original sincere question. You're good at sarcasm!

    The signals were actually unclear though. Even you thought he was 100% interested....but nope. He's just a friendly guy.

    Oh yeah.. and who's being sarcastic? This second guy is definitely in love with me!

    So was the first guy. You just pushed him away.

    I talked to him on the phone the other night for TWO hours and he called at like 9:20 when I was ready for bed... how is that pushing him away? If he were interested, he would be like "Hey girl. I like you."

    This is still sarcasm right?

    I'm just saying... I'm not shutting him down. He wouldn't continue calling if I did. Just because I didn't go to certain events with him doesn't mean I squashed whatever was there. We still hung out other times.

    And him calling doesn't automatically equate to him being interested in more than friendship. I talk to many of my friends on a weekly basis.

    Well no of course not, shutting him down wouldn't keep him in the friend zone or still on the line.

    Um. Why am I the one keeping him on the line? Is he not keeping me on the line by continuing to call and not asking me out? I friendzoned him for my own mind's sake. It doesn't look any different than what we were doing before to him. I don't call him "bro" or talk about farts with him.

    I thought he asked you out all the time and that was the problem?
    Still, he invites me to thing after thing
    then he says "Well, let's hang out this weekend." But because I'm the most awkward person alive... I.... pause... because I don't want to say "yes" and it just be another big social event. And in the middle of my pause, he says " I mean.. you don't have to.. it's okay. "

    He's not asking me out... He's just inviting me to social events with his other friends. He's never been like "Lets go get dinner just us." That time he wanted to do something during the weekend did turn out to be just another friend's hangout.

    My problem was that I didn't know at the time if he was trying to have it mean more. Now that more time has passed, I see he is just a really outgoing, friendly guy.

    I'd think that if he wanted more, he would have invited to go see a movie or something... but just the two of you. For sure.

    Exactly. A cup of coffee.... something. He's clearly not afraid to call me up and chat all the time... grabbing a cup of coffee wouldn't be that huge of a leap.
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  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    Is he good?
  • branflakes1980
    branflakes1980 Posts: 2,516 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    March Update: Me and this guy are dating now.

    I just stumbled upon this, and read quite a bit, but then definitely skipped some too... Please clarify, you are now dating "Pete"
  • ButterIsGood
    ButterIsGood Posts: 201 Member
    Idk... I think he might be interested but doesn't want to lose the friendship you guys have incase you don't feel the same way.. The part I have to question is why did you break up with the guy you were seeing? Are you sure it had nothing to do with this guy you are talking with?
  • Roza42
    Roza42 Posts: 246 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    March Update: Me and this guy are dating now.
    So I have to ask, are you dating Pete or Mr. I Spaced Out? Someone had to ask, ROFL.

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    WE NEED DETAILS. I'm happy for you though :D
  • funjen1972
    funjen1972 Posts: 949 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    March Update: Me and this guy are dating now.

    ❤️ a good plot twist!
This discussion has been closed.