We broke up because...

1…25922593259525972598…2696

Replies

  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    edited May 2020
    Cat..128th time. She pushed me off the boat in sharks infested water🤯

    PoP...she said she was going for a run.. man.. she bolted and never returned.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Fine...but I threw in a life ring to show you I cared.
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Cat0703a wrote: »
    Fine...but I threw in a life ring to show you I cared.

    Life ring filled with lead and blood. 😳
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Aww, sugar, where’s your sense of adventure? You said without it our relationship was getting stale.
  • happimess01
    happimess01 Posts: 9,074 Member
    she was too forward. Second date and she was already picking wedgies in front of me
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Forward or authentic? We disagreed on everything
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Adventure swimming with 🐬 not 🦈.


    🤪
  • jjsavoh
    jjsavoh Posts: 135 Member
    edited May 2020
    Because adventure to her meant a spoonful of sweet onion teriyaki
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    He didn’t like where I asked him to put the teriyaki.
  • PlentyofProtein00
    PlentyofProtein00 Posts: 3,669 Member
    She put food throughout the house. We were attracting bugs🤢
  • happimess01
    happimess01 Posts: 9,074 Member
    she didnt want me as a human sushi platter on her b'day
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    He didn’t like the fact I wasn’t the greatest with chopsticks. 😖
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She ate everything with her hands.. even soup.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Lies, I tell you, lies!!! She had to go!!!
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    She always had to go. Every 5 minutes. Even during....well, every 5 minutes.
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    She was in such a rush!!
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    She wouldn't move to Australia
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    I moved to Australia and she got scared. Restraining order scared.
  • happimess01
    happimess01 Posts: 9,074 Member
    she had a court order to stay 100 yards away from old age homes at all times
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    False advertising.. he wasn't particularly happi
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    She found another.. dump me out on the curb
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    lx1x wrote: »
    She found another.. dump me out on the curb

    Never my little love muffin.. I'm keeping you 😁🤗
  • PlentyofProtein00
    PlentyofProtein00 Posts: 3,669 Member
    She's keeping him not me :'(
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She got away. Literally. I thought I had those knots tied tighter. 🤔
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    She had a Don Knotts lifesize doll tied up in her closet. Creeeeee-py
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He said I looked like Don Knotts wtf :(
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    Kept calling me Barney and locking me in a cell
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Callousedthoughts wrote: »
    Kept calling me Barney and locking me in a cell

    Oh puuulllease, you begged to be put in there, Barney😄 :p
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    edited May 2020
    Told everyone about my fantasies
  • PlentyofProtein00
    PlentyofProtein00 Posts: 3,669 Member
    I was not in any of his fantasies :o

Categories