We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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Scored lower than Ralphy 😬0
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She yelled out Ralphy’s name during intimate moments.0
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She yelled out my name an average of 15 times per intimate moment. I knew we could do better.0
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You try yelling Callousedthoughts out loud 15 times. My mouth got tired. 😉0
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Yet that tired mouth still managed to yell out "Maria Conchita Alonzo" every time!!0
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She had the jimmy legs and I had the bruises to prove it. Even danced in her sleep0
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She wouldn't support my dreams 😞0
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Her dreams included watching dancing with the stars and eating nougat all day0
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Because guilty feet have got no rhythm0
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We did? I'm the last to know
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She was in denial0
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His dutch ovens were lethal.. I died
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Didnt like my "cooking"0
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Called takeout 'cooking'. I'm al for takeout, but call it what it is0
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He was too literal.0
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She was too lateral. I slept upright, she wanted to lie sideways0
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He was too into his body0
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Her hand would get stuck in the Pringles can every time. Annoying!0
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Stole all my pringles0
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I kept getting jabbed in the *kitten* from all her pringles crumbs in the bed0
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Didn’t understand the concept of emergency bed snacks. Always thinking about his *kitten* and not my need to be satiated.0
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This woman was insatiable. I only broke up with her to get a couple hours of sleep, then got back together.0
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2 words E. D 😔0
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She had a lover named Ed. Ed? Really?0
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He wanted to share my lover Ed.. was annoyed when Ed said no way.
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She had to run everything passed Ed first. While funny at first, it got stale fast.0
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She ran too fast, could never catch her. And Ed kept laughing at my attempts. *kitten* you Ed.1
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He wanted to *kitten* someone named ED. PD wasn’t good enough for him. 😒0
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Tried to act like Ed wasnt a part of her harem. I saw him slotted in every other Tuesday at 5 to 5:45 in her little black book calendar.1
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I just found out the hard way (yes in a public post on MFP) that PD gave more time to Ed then she did to me. 😭2
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