We broke up because...

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Replies

  • romeandrylan
    romeandrylan Posts: 101 Member
    You weren't dirty enough :p
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    You weren’t clean enough. So sweaty!
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Have you seen Monk show? Well she's the original Monk. Wipes, super clean etc. Everything has to be in order to her liking 24/7.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    We drifted apart
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Have you seen her drive?? Tokyo drift got nothing on her.. 😳😬
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He drove me nuts, I had to be institutionalised 🤯
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    *whisper.. that's her own doing..

    Coo coo 🤣
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He said the harem was full.. So he kicked me out :'(
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Hav you seen her basement? 🤯
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    lx1x wrote: »
    Hav you seen her basement? 🤯

    Empty :(

    He said I've got a lot of love to give so went and shared it all around the neighbourhood :D
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Share all she does
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He started charging for his "services
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Hasn't paid her dues for over a year
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He said .. "git" so I did :(
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    The trust was broken. Trust fuels relationships. Without it you need to walk away.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Didn't trust me :( honestly, I have no idea how those people got under our bed and in our closet o:):#
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She stopped letting me hide people at her place. 😒
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    She was harboring fugitives with her Ex
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She turned me in to the authorities.
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    Told me to respect her authority, then smacked me with a donut. Still have sprinkles in my hair
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
    Chewed through the chain, and ran away.
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    Had an invisible fence up. I thought I was getting away. Woke up right back in chains
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    Wanted me to call him Alice
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Did appreciate how I kept him safe. So ungrateful.
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
    They kept fighting over me. I AM NOT A PIECE OF MEAT.
  • Justn_83
    Justn_83 Posts: 492 Member
    Because they aren't a piece of meat and I am HUNGRY
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
    He ate all my groceries... Again.
  • Justn_83
    Justn_83 Posts: 492 Member
    Never listens to me! I told her I would repay her for the groceries!
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
    Doesnt understand that massages don't actually count as monetary repayment!
  • Justn_83
    Justn_83 Posts: 492 Member
    Because my massages are AMAZING and that was never good enough

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