What's on your mind?

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Replies

  • mynameisnobody1990
    mynameisnobody1990 Posts: 71 Member
    A friend who I've known 3/4 of my life's father passed away last week. We normally speak /see each other every week /on the very regular lately. He was never supportive of her life choices, and they had a rather acrimonious relationship. With the assistance at a care home he was in ,both she and her sibling helped take care of him to the very end. Normally she is very open and reaches out to me but now she is rather distant. She was not around when my mom passed away but that's ok. I texted her as I don't want to be a pain in the *kitten* calling her . I did say I love you and I'm here for you.* we say that to each other :) Our contact has been very minimal - and I feel sad and helpless.. is there anything I can do other than just let her be? I feel like I've done all I can... :s
  • iMago
    iMago Posts: 8,714 Member
    A friend who I've known 3/4 of my life's father passed away last week. We normally speak /see each other every week /on the very regular lately. He was never supportive of her life choices, and they had a rather acrimonious relationship. With the assistance at a care home he was in ,both she and her sibling helped take care of him to the very end. Normally she is very open and reaches out to me but now she is rather distant. She was not around when my mom passed away but that's ok. I texted her as I don't want to be a pain in the *kitten* calling her . I did say I love you and I'm here for you.* we say that to each other :) Our contact has been very minimal - and I feel sad and helpless.. is there anything I can do other than just let her be? I feel like I've done all I can... :s

    times like that i figure all you can do is tell them "hey I'm here and I'll never forget you"

    but sometimes somethings just have to run their course
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  • mynameisnobody1990
    mynameisnobody1990 Posts: 71 Member
    iMago wrote: »
    A friend who I've known 3/4 of my life's father passed away last week. We normally speak /see each other every week /on the very regular lately. He was never supportive of her life choices, and they had a rather acrimonious relationship. With the assistance at a care home he was in ,both she and her sibling helped take care of him to the very end. Normally she is very open and reaches out to me but now she is rather distant. She was not around when my mom passed away but that's ok. I texted her as I don't want to be a pain in the *kitten* calling her . I did say I love you and I'm here for you.* we say that to each other :) Our contact has been very minimal - and I feel sad and helpless.. is there anything I can do other than just let her be? I feel like I've done all I can... :s

    times like that i figure all you can do is tell them "hey I'm here and I'll never forget you"

    but sometimes somethings just have to run their course

    Thank you - I appreciate your kind words
  • mynameisnobody1990
    mynameisnobody1990 Posts: 71 Member
    iMago wrote: »

    WHAT is with the phone moving ON THE FLOOR!!
  • iMago
    iMago Posts: 8,714 Member
    iMago wrote: »

    WHAT is with the phone moving ON THE FLOOR!!

    either a poltergeist or a meth junkie living in that house
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    Sweet Caroline makes my ears throw up.

    You know it's weird... I've always wondered why two of England's best fighters, Hatton and Fury, always came out to sweet Caroline...

    I thought it was kinda an important song for the British but never understood why...
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    So I just finally finished the 50 shades series since my boy is at the grandparents and the wife and I could finally watch it...

    It was Meh ehh, Umm... Well I guess it wasn't supposed to be good 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    I guess it was a cute movie... Everything it had going for it kinda just disappeared in the 2nd act and the ending fell totally flat...

  • mynameisnobody1990
    mynameisnobody1990 Posts: 71 Member
    iMago wrote: »
    iMago wrote: »

    WHAT is with the phone moving ON THE FLOOR!!

    either a poltergeist or a meth junkie living in that house

    either way nothing good will come of it >:)
  • iMago
    iMago Posts: 8,714 Member
    iMago wrote: »
    iMago wrote: »

    WHAT is with the phone moving ON THE FLOOR!!

    either a poltergeist or a meth junkie living in that house

    either way nothing good will come of it >:)

    uOO5Btr.gif
  • ghudson92
    ghudson92 Posts: 2,061 Member
    So I just finally finished the 50 shades series since my boy is at the grandparents and the wife and I could finally watch it...

    It was Meh ehh, Umm... Well I guess it wasn't supposed to be good 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    I guess it was a cute movie... Everything it had going for it kinda just disappeared in the 2nd act and the ending fell totally flat...

    I didn't enjoy any of them. Boring characters, boring storyline, and boring sex.
  • jmakleanaddo
    jmakleanaddo Posts: 101 Member
    For 6 years of my life i was in a long relationship that seemed incredibly loving and real or so seemed. At the core of it there were so many lies and toxicity.She(51 when we but 56 now) was much older and took advantage of my(23 When we met but 28 now) naivety and trusting nature. I was so blinded by love that i did not even notice all the control and manipulation. She did not feel beautiful so she felt the need to keep me looking unattractive and hate myself because she was unhappy with her life. She lied about who she was, what she did in her past, made up stories about people in her life just so i would trust her and like her. I still pains me that throughout our relationship she did not value or trust me enough to share the truth with. She maintained her lies to the very end. Once i confronted her about these lies, she got upset and blocked me permanently. We had built so much supposed love and trust in each other but i guess it was all just a farce and i was being manipulated to meet her emotional needs while she satisfied her other other needs with other men. It is painful to discover that you gave someone your whole heart and yet they only gave you a piece in order to protect themselves. I was truly foolish and should have paid attention to all the red flags i encountered during the relationship. I will not sit her completely paint her black however. We share great moments together. We most surely did. In fact we became the best of friends and deep down, friends is truly all that we should have stayed. I know i dodged a bullet and i wish her well and hope she finds happiness somehow while being a compulsive liar. I truly do hope she changes because she is a very kind and loving person. We were just not meant for each other and should have realized that sooner. I, however, realize that i have a lot of life ahead of me and in time the pain will hurt a lot less. I hope she is able to make the changes she needs to make in a life so she can one day truly find the happiness she is looking for.

    Anyways I've been on Keto for 4 months now and i am feeling great and ready to move on with my life and do the things that i need to do for myself! If you have a similar story you want to share that motivated you, this is the place to do it. Looking forward to hearing from all of you! Take care and stay motivated to keep reaching those goals! My Instagram is Jaymow05 and I will be sharing my fitness journey there if anyone is interested in following me along the way!

    DO NOT LOOK FOR LOVE ON MFP! And if you do ASK QUESTIONS! LOTS OF QUESTIONS! I was so naive and trusting and that has been my nature for a long time but this experience has helped me grow and i am prepared to make much much better decisions about my life, the people i connect with and who i put my trust into. Not everyone wants the best for you, even if they claim that they do.
  • jmakleanaddo
    jmakleanaddo Posts: 101 Member
    edited August 2020
    baebabu wrote: »
    This week was weird, hope next week is better. Strange vibes all around

    I hope things got better for eventually! Mine this week has been an emotional rollercoaster! Keep Staying strong!
  • jmakleanaddo
    jmakleanaddo Posts: 101 Member
    Currently: A sex (ish) dream I had involving a former friend. I don't know why my brain can't conjure up someone I'd actually want to see in my dreams.. or why I can't have normal dreams. They're always weird, twisted or nightmarish. :(

    Welcome to my world! Hope you recovered from it!
  • jmakleanaddo
    jmakleanaddo Posts: 101 Member
    Sweet Caroline makes my ears throw up.

    You know it's weird... I've always wondered why two of England's best fighters, Hatton and Fury, always came out to sweet Caroline...

    I thought it was kinda an important song for the British but never understood why...

    This song reminds me of my ex girlfriend so no thanks! Great song though. Neil Diamond is Amazing !
  • jmakleanaddo
    jmakleanaddo Posts: 101 Member
    Going through a pretty painful breakup at the moment. Any advice on how to manage with the pain and letting go of promises made and other people in their lives that you cared about that you may never see again?
  • ghudson92
    ghudson92 Posts: 2,061 Member
    Sweet Caroline makes my ears throw up.

    You know it's weird... I've always wondered why two of England's best fighters, Hatton and Fury, always came out to sweet Caroline...

    I thought it was kinda an important song for the British but never understood why...

    We get turnt to this song
  • ghudson92
    ghudson92 Posts: 2,061 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    ghudson92 wrote: »
    jcrav77 wrote: »
    Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence”
    ~Aristotle

    I feel like the term happiness today has become very skewed. I think it’s more of an illusion or a delusion. Your happiness never meets up with anyone else’s and therefore for them to be happy you have to be miserable. There is an illusion that you are happy because you give up on what you find happy In order to keep peace. But it’s not really happiness it’s just an existence.

    May I contribute to your reflections on happiness, in the only way I know how - which is longwinded and potentially alienating to my audience:

    Aristotle's concept of happiness was based around taking action (that's a very reductionist and simplistic representation by me of his work - Nichomachean Ethics). His overall message was that in order to lead a "good" life one must take virtuous action towards goals that are of importance to the self and society.

    Interestingly, much contemporary and emerging research, particularly those concerned with stress/trauma etc, points towards "taking action" (again, a simplistic reduction).

    I dont believe happiness centres around attachment to others but in the actions we take and the intention of those actions (oh Aristotlean virtue-ethics there you are). Its the link between intent, purpose, and action and the overall result.

    This has been my Ted Talk today. Signed - bored phd student on a tangent.

    Happiness is a serious problem.

    lockdown has me spending too much time in my thesis 🤷‍♀️
  • Miss_Chiev0us
    Miss_Chiev0us Posts: 1,592 Member
    I woke up with bacon on my mind
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    A person can be just as lonely with a person as without.
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    why am i so lonely? catfishing ... debating on watching Netflix n calling partyline .... how am I perceived on here..why are ppl deleting me ...so many thoughts on my mind

    People are here for many reasons. I get deleted too. Most of us on here have been deleted by someone. We're all on different journeys. You have to accept that you're not everyone's favorite cup of tea and that's totally okay. Its a hard pill to swallow but once you grasp the reality of it that it's okay for people to decide that they don't want you around, it will be much better for your soul and ego and you won't feel so rejected. It took me a very long time to learn that and be okay with that. Upside, other people will come along & will accept you for who you are.

    OMG!! You deleted meee! 🙈
  • _sw33tp3a_11
    _sw33tp3a_11 Posts: 4,692 Member
    why am i so lonely? catfishing ... debating on watching Netflix n calling partyline .... how am I perceived on here..why are ppl deleting me ...so many thoughts on my mind

    People are here for many reasons. I get deleted too. Most of us on here have been deleted by someone. We're all on different journeys. You have to accept that you're not everyone's favorite cup of tea and that's totally okay. Its a hard pill to swallow but once you grasp the reality of it that it's okay for people to decide that they don't want you around, it will be much better for your soul and ego and you won't feel so rejected. It took me a very long time to learn that and be okay with that. Upside, other people will come along & will accept you for who you are.

    OMG!! You deleted meee! 🙈

    I DID NOT!!!!!!! 🤣😂
  • mamakatiekat
    mamakatiekat Posts: 74 Member
    Caffeine. Contemplating making more coffee but i've already had a monster as well. I'm just so tired. I'm a literal Mombie today 😭
  • vanityy99
    vanityy99 Posts: 2,583 Member
    Going through a pretty painful breakup at the moment. Any advice on how to manage with the pain and letting go of promises made and other people in their lives that you cared about that you may never see again?

    Doesn’t matter what promises were made, who you cared about blah blah blah it’s just excuses to keep holding on. It doesn’t matter, right now you focus on you. Go through the emotions, be mad, cry, that’s apart of the healing process. And do the no contact rule, out of sight out of mind. Don’t check for her, on social media ect. Make sure she cant get ahold of you, the worst is having contact during the first stages of a break up. The sooner you cut off the faster you heal and move on. This pain is temporary, please don’t prolong it by talking to her again.

    Well that’s just my IMO everyone’s different.

  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    A person can be just as lonely with a person as without.

    Oh don't I know this one. Every day. In most of my relationships.
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    why am i so lonely? catfishing ... debating on watching Netflix n calling partyline .... how am I perceived on here..why are ppl deleting me ...so many thoughts on my mind

    People are here for many reasons. I get deleted too. Most of us on here have been deleted by someone. We're all on different journeys. You have to accept that you're not everyone's favorite cup of tea and that's totally okay. Its a hard pill to swallow but once you grasp the reality of it that it's okay for people to decide that they don't want you around, it will be much better for your soul and ego and you won't feel so rejected. It took me a very long time to learn that and be okay with that. Upside, other people will come along & will accept you for who you are.

    OMG!! You deleted meee! 🙈

    I DID NOT!!!!!!! 🤣😂

    Maybe it was your twin sis sweet pea then 🤷🏽‍♂️...
    She must be the evil twin 😏