Guys/Girls: What is your real opinion on..

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  • fstrickl
    fstrickl Posts: 883 Member
    ythannah wrote: »
    Ladies...

    A guy who pushes you to do more and improve, or a guy who accepts you just as you are and can careless about pushing you?

    I'm going with don't push me. Accept me as I am, support my decisions and efforts regarding changes that I want to make, but recognize that they will be my choice. Make suggestions but if I decline, drop it.

    I have a bad tendency to get my back up really fast when I hear "you should...". I interpret that as the other person thinking they know better than I do. So I will automatically reject anything that comes after the should, even if it's good advice, unless I specifically asked for it.

    When I had been lifting for a few years and was into progressively heavier weights, the SO told me not to get "too muscular" because "it doesn't look good on a woman". Not that there's any danger whatsoever that I will get too visibly muscular :D but I shot that advice down real quick.

    Interesting because when I think of being pushed I hear “you can”. As in “you can do another 10 jump squats” or “you can take up XYZ if you want to”. Does that count as pushing? Or is pushing negative only?
  • PlentyofProtein00
    PlentyofProtein00 Posts: 3,684 Member
    fstrickl wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    Ladies...

    A guy who pushes you to do more and improve, or a guy who accepts you just as you are and can careless about pushing you?

    I'm going with don't push me. Accept me as I am, support my decisions and efforts regarding changes that I want to make, but recognize that they will be my choice. Make suggestions but if I decline, drop it.

    I have a bad tendency to get my back up really fast when I hear "you should...". I interpret that as the other person thinking they know better than I do. So I will automatically reject anything that comes after the should, even if it's good advice, unless I specifically asked for it.

    When I had been lifting for a few years and was into progressively heavier weights, the SO told me not to get "too muscular" because "it doesn't look good on a woman". Not that there's any danger whatsoever that I will get too visibly muscular :D but I shot that advice down real quick.

    Interesting because when I think of being pushed I hear “you can”. As in “you can do another 10 jump squats” or “you can take up XYZ if you want to”. Does that count as pushing? Or is pushing negative only?

    I hate when it comes off in a bossy manner...thats when ill do the opposite. Id think it'd have to do with tone, phrasing, and intent.
  • fstrickl
    fstrickl Posts: 883 Member
    Interesting because when I think of being pushed I hear “you can”. As in “you can do another 10 jump squats” or “you can take up XYZ if you want to”. Does that count as pushing? Or is pushing negative only?

    I hate when it comes off in a bossy manner...thats when ill do the opposite. Id think it'd have to do with tone, phrasing, and intent.[/quote]

    Mmhmm! Okay, I get that!
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    ythannah wrote: »
    Ladies...

    A guy who pushes you to do more and improve, or a guy who accepts you just as you are and can careless about pushing you?

    I'm going with don't push me. Accept me as I am, support my decisions and efforts regarding changes that I want to make, but recognize that they will be my choice. Make suggestions but if I decline, drop it.

    I have a bad tendency to get my back up really fast when I hear "you should...". I interpret that as the other person thinking they know better than I do. So I will automatically reject anything that comes after the should, even if it's good advice, unless I specifically asked for it.

    When I had been lifting for a few years and was into progressively heavier weights, the SO told me not to get "too muscular" because "it doesn't look good on a woman". Not that there's any danger whatsoever that I will get too visibly muscular :D but I shot that advice down real quick.
    threewins wrote: »
    Ladies: how would/do you feel when know that your partner would prefer that you never wear makeup?

    I feel that perhaps he'd be better off with a woman who never wears makeup and not me.

    😂...

    I don't know if I would say it like that... But I feel the same way as your husband... I mean not that it matters 🤷🏽‍♂️

  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*
  • ermengarde22
    ermengarde22 Posts: 2,116 Member
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    oh no
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,393 Member
    fstrickl wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    Ladies...

    A guy who pushes you to do more and improve, or a guy who accepts you just as you are and can careless about pushing you?

    I'm going with don't push me. Accept me as I am, support my decisions and efforts regarding changes that I want to make, but recognize that they will be my choice. Make suggestions but if I decline, drop it.

    I have a bad tendency to get my back up really fast when I hear "you should...". I interpret that as the other person thinking they know better than I do. So I will automatically reject anything that comes after the should, even if it's good advice, unless I specifically asked for it.

    When I had been lifting for a few years and was into progressively heavier weights, the SO told me not to get "too muscular" because "it doesn't look good on a woman". Not that there's any danger whatsoever that I will get too visibly muscular :D but I shot that advice down real quick.

    Interesting because when I think of being pushed I hear “you can”. As in “you can do another 10 jump squats” or “you can take up XYZ if you want to”. Does that count as pushing? Or is pushing negative only?

    I would describe that more as "encouragement" than "pushing", which is very different IMO. More of a cheerleading type thing.

    Maybe it's just semantics.
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,393 Member
    ythannah wrote: »
    Ladies...

    A guy who pushes you to do more and improve, or a guy who accepts you just as you are and can careless about pushing you?

    I'm going with don't push me. Accept me as I am, support my decisions and efforts regarding changes that I want to make, but recognize that they will be my choice. Make suggestions but if I decline, drop it.

    I have a bad tendency to get my back up really fast when I hear "you should...". I interpret that as the other person thinking they know better than I do. So I will automatically reject anything that comes after the should, even if it's good advice, unless I specifically asked for it.

    When I had been lifting for a few years and was into progressively heavier weights, the SO told me not to get "too muscular" because "it doesn't look good on a woman". Not that there's any danger whatsoever that I will get too visibly muscular :D but I shot that advice down real quick.
    threewins wrote: »
    Ladies: how would/do you feel when know that your partner would prefer that you never wear makeup?

    I feel that perhaps he'd be better off with a woman who never wears makeup and not me.

    😂...

    I don't know if I would say it like that... But I feel the same way as your husband... I mean not that it matters 🤷🏽‍♂️

    I think it comes down to what "too muscular" means to you. I sent him pics of what my ideal/goal was and he very sensibly kept his mouth shut. :D But I do think he meant not to end up looking like one of those chemically enhanced Russian body builder women, which is a very silly thing to worry about in my case.
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    giphy.gif?cid=4d1e4f29c5zi3txic0mzlhz2kvq8ytli8w3181fiz74vndab&rid=giphy.gif
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    There’s nothing wrong with having preferences or stating those preferences.. but if it turns into dictating someone’s behavior then it’s too much
  • ermengarde22
    ermengarde22 Posts: 2,116 Member
    edited September 2020
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore
  • PlentyofProtein00
    PlentyofProtein00 Posts: 3,684 Member
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think theres a difference in stating preferences and demanding or belittling or manipulating to get what you want.

    If a man prefers a certain body type and puts you down for not having it...or comments how you need to work harder or stop eating cookies...thats where I think it becomes an issue.

    My SO grows a beard in cooler weather and shaves in warmer...he thinks I prefer the beard but I actually feel like I get best of both worlds ...its fun to me both looks hVe their appeal
  • Reckoner69_lmao
    Reckoner69_lmao Posts: 1,000 Member
    hrichts wrote: »
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think it's only wrong if yer like "you should grow a beard and if you don't I'm gonna glue one to your face made out of your old hair (I've been collecting from your haircuts) while you sleep"

    So gluing it to *my* face is still okay though

    Definitely, in fact I dare say it might be *encouraged*
  • ermengarde22
    ermengarde22 Posts: 2,116 Member
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think it's only wrong if yer like "you should grow a beard and if you don't I'm gonna glue one to your face made out of your old hair (I've been collecting from your haircuts) while you sleep"

    Well *kitten*...

    🤦🏼‍♀️

    ikr?! next they are going to make a rule that blood oaths are “weird” and say cats aren’t the same as real babies :(
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think theres a difference in stating preferences and demanding or belittling or manipulating to get what you want.

    If a man prefers a certain body type and puts you down for not having it...or comments how you need to work harder or stop eating cookies...thats where I think it becomes an issue negging

    My SO grows a beard in cooler weather and shaves in warmer...he thinks I prefer the beard but I actually feel like I get best of both worlds ...its fun to me both looks hVe their appeal

    Fify
  • ermengarde22
    ermengarde22 Posts: 2,116 Member
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think theres a difference in stating preferences and demanding or belittling or manipulating to get what you want.

    If a man prefers a certain body type and puts you down for not having it...or comments how you need to work harder or stop eating cookies...thats where I think it becomes an issue.

    My SO grows a beard in cooler weather and shaves in warmer...he thinks I prefer the beard but I actually feel like I get best of both worlds ...its fun to me both looks hVe their appeal

    is crying or putting out is considered manipulative?
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    hrichts wrote: »
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think it's only wrong if yer like "you should grow a beard and if you don't I'm gonna glue one to your face made out of your old hair (I've been collecting from your haircuts) while you sleep"

    So gluing it to *my* face is still okay though

    Definitely, in fact I dare say it might be *encouraged*

    OH NO HE DI-INT
  • _DisasterDoll_
    _DisasterDoll_ Posts: 178 Member
    edited September 2020
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think theres a difference in stating preferences and demanding or belittling or manipulating to get what you want.

    If a man prefers a certain body type and puts you down for not having it...or comments how you need to work harder or stop eating cookies...thats where I think it becomes an issue.

    My SO grows a beard in cooler weather and shaves in warmer...he thinks I prefer the beard but I actually feel like I get best of both worlds ...its fun to me both looks hVe their appeal

    is crying or putting out is considered manipulative?

    Thats what I consider back-alley wizardry.

  • PlentyofProtein00
    PlentyofProtein00 Posts: 3,684 Member
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. We all like what we like. I just don’t think it’s right for me to think anyone would change their appearance for my preferences. If I asked him....”what do you actually like better?” and be liked something different than my norm it would be up to me to decide how to proceed from there. If I liked wearing it and he said something to me about wanting me to not.....there would be a problem. Just like a woman who doesn’t like it....can you imagine her guy telling her to wear makeup? Eeeek.

    i agree with everything u said but i am def the kind who will be like “u should grow a beard 😍” or “yes keep the beard dont change pls” and never thought twice about it and like is that wrong idk anymore

    I think theres a difference in stating preferences and demanding or belittling or manipulating to get what you want.

    If a man prefers a certain body type and puts you down for not having it...or comments how you need to work harder or stop eating cookies...thats where I think it becomes an issue.

    My SO grows a beard in cooler weather and shaves in warmer...he thinks I prefer the beard but I actually feel like I get best of both worlds ...its fun to me both looks hVe their appeal

    is crying or putting out is considered manipulative?

    Thats what I consider back-alley wizardry.

    I call it positive reinforces.
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    edited September 2020
    Everyone needs to freaking chill alright 🙆🏽‍♂️... 😂

    For tmfr... I never said one should be forced on the other, I don't think any look should be forced on anyone...

    But let's just face it and say it... Beards are trending right now...

    I just wonder how many less "beards" post I would see in the Weaknesses thread if it wasn't the popular trending "in" thing right now...

    No makeup however is different... 🤷🏽‍♂️

    That's all I'm saying 🤷🏽‍♂️......... 😂

    https://youtu.be/7mfkl_Ny74U
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    Everyone needs to freaking chill alright 🙆🏽‍♂️... 😂

    For tmfr... I never said one should be forced on the other, I don't think any look should be forced on anyone...

    But let's just face it and say it... Beards are trending right now...

    I just wonder how many less "beards" post I would see in the Weaknesses thread if it wasn't the popular trending "in" thing right now...

    No makeup however is different... 🤷🏽‍♂️

    That's all I'm saying 🤷🏽‍♂️......... 😂

    https://youtu.be/7mfkl_Ny74U

    I feel like everyone is calm except you dude. Calm the *kitten* down. Aight?

    ft4jq4ey0w1c.gif
    oa1imgq02wma.gif

    😂... Come on don't hate me, I love you guys 💕

    I'm just *kitten* with you... Blame it on the alcohol and I'll be back to quoting Rod Stewart tomorrow 😂...
  • Yoshiboobs
    Yoshiboobs Posts: 1,090 Member
    guys/girls

    whats the best thing anyone ever given u as a gift

    My mom got me a "my size" Barbie doll one year and put it in my bed so when I woke up from my nap it was there. I cried.
    My brother got me a puppy once, I cried.
    The gf made a Christmas ornament with my cat's paw print in it. I cried.
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    Everyone needs to freaking chill alright 🙆🏽‍♂️... 😂

    For tmfr... I never said one should be forced on the other, I don't think any look should be forced on anyone...

    But let's just face it and say it... Beards are trending right now...

    I just wonder how many less "beards" post I would see in the Weaknesses thread if it wasn't the popular trending "in" thing right now...

    No makeup however is different... 🤷🏽‍♂️

    That's all I'm saying 🤷🏽‍♂️......... 😂

    https://youtu.be/7mfkl_Ny74U
    MelG7777 wrote: »
    Everyone needs to freaking chill alright 🙆🏽‍♂️... 😂

    For tmfr... I never said one should be forced on the other, I don't think any look should be forced on anyone...

    But let's just face it and say it... Beards are trending right now...

    I just wonder how many less "beards" post I would see in the Weaknesses thread if it wasn't the popular trending "in" thing right now...

    No makeup however is different... 🤷🏽‍♂️

    That's all I'm saying 🤷🏽‍♂️......... 😂

    https://youtu.be/7mfkl_Ny74U

    I feel like everyone is calm except you dude. Calm the *kitten* down. Aight?

    ft4jq4ey0w1c.gif

    NONE OF US WOULD HAVE TO YELL IF @Reckoner69_lmao WOULD PUT AWAY THOSE DAMN CYMBALS
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,393 Member
    If ladies can say they like beards 🙄...

    Then what's wrong with a guy saying he prefers little to no makeup? 🤷🏽‍♂️...

    *ducks*

    I'll play this one too.

    I really dislike facial hair on men, always have. The SO had a beard when we met. I was very careful not to express my preference because I didn't want him to feel that I was disappointed in any aspect of his appearance, and I didn't want him to feel the slightest bit of pressure or coercion to shave it off. His face, his choice.

    It took about 6 or 7 years for him to ask, and then I replied honestly.