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Less Alcohol - DECEMBER 2020 - One Day At A Time
Replies
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This photo seems apropos. I DO drink hot tea also. This is NOT me. LOL
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My turn for a story
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The main reason besides keeping in shape for having less alcohol is I dont want to become my Mom. As a kid I would avoid bringing home buddies because my Mom was and still is a parent that drinks way too much.
Having a parent that loves alcohol more than her kids is rough. She does not get it. Always says she will get straight. It never has happened for more than a few months. I dont care how old she is and claims it as her right. Be responsible I might have kids some day, I would not want them to know her. My sister feels the same way.15 -
AF another evening yesterday! This is becoming easier. Just gotta stay busy in the evenings (not hard with having 2 little boys, 4 yo and 2-1/2 yo lol). Thank you all for you support!!
2 AF days / 3 day
Goal: 5 AF days / 7 days11 -
Way to go @brittgreenlikethecolor88. It sounds like you have your hands full. Nice job5
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Suddenly I have a desire for 🔥HOT tea. Hmmmmmmmmm the power of suggestion.5
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@cmb44512 I have no kids and can not imagine a parent having no respect for their children's feelings like that. I only have dogs and I have felt bad in the past not remembering if I feed them the night before because of me having too many drinks.
My heart goes out to you and your Sister.
Thank you for sharing4 -
A few bourbon & 7up ... nice evening with my mom & dh. I cooked lunch & dinner. Mom & I have just about consolidated all her bills and bank accts, battled a new budget for 2021 (that includes her poker ladies night as entertainment but also sets aside money for insurance and property taxes and an emergency fund). We also cancelled her direct tv and set her up with Chromecast goggle tv device with YoutubeTV. Last but not least went through her medicare situation. Oh and she is almost finished with decorating for Christmas. I had no idea that her stuff and finances were that messed up ... well I did but I had my head buried in the sand.
Dec accountability: 0/3 days AF
Goal: AF days 3 per week / 12 per month; limi10 -
Day 3 done
3 days af/goal 219 -
globalhiker wrote: »@mainelylisa my dog was 15 too....maybe I need a puppy for Christmas and that will solve all my problems
Let's shoot for Canada hiking next...this way we can visit Dawn for the mojito parties and I was hoping I'd learn some singing tips from her. Plus, wine is super expensive in Canada so we can't get into too much trouble....maybe...
Sounds like a girl party brewing : - )
Stupendous hiking.
Yes yes we will sing our hearts out!! My neighbours are well used to it, or they can just move away away away if they don't like it : - )4 -
New home for the thread, but the same goals for me, 16-20 AF days per month.
Tuesday December 01 - AF - Super long and stressful work day, I really wanted a drink when I finally got home, but over the past months I have been trying to "save up" my drinking days for happy occasions, not to relieve stress. Planning AF for tomorrow also.
Wednesday December 02 - AF - I think that this might be my 4th AF day in a row.
Thursday December 03 - Drinks. Work Stress drinks. I had just finished saying that I was trying not to do that. Instead of my usual 3, I had 2. It took the edge off. The 2 drinks prevented me from quitting this one particular job outright (I am a Merchandiser and work for several companies). I will sleep on it.
Rolling total: 2AF days out of 3 days7 -
My turn for a story
.
The main reason besides keeping in shape for having less alcohol is I dont want to become my Mom. As a kid I would avoid bringing home buddies because my Mom was and still is a parent that drinks way too much.
Having a parent that loves alcohol more than her kids is rough. She does not get it. Always says she will get straight. It never has happened for more than a few months. I dont care how old she is and claims it as her right. Be responsible I might have kids some day, I would not want them to know her. My sister feels the same way.
That is such a good reason to prevent yourself from going down the same path.
Alcohol is habitual and addictive for sure.
What was she like when she would quit for a few months at a time?
Thank you so much for sharing your story with us.4 -
Good morning less alcohol group.
Weather is very unseasonal for the first week of December. Warmer by at least 10 degrees. I thought I was finished putting up Christmas decorations but if the weather stays like this I may have to dig back into the outdoor lights box and get to stringing up more.
Now I understand why it took me an entire week to decorate for the holidays. Before 2018 Chritmas decorating triggered having a glass in one hand and and ornament in the other. Trying to steady myself on a step ladder to apply the tree star while sipping was always a danger too. I commented this year without really thinking that gee everything went up so quick without a problem. The year I kept pulling the strings of lights back off the tree because I could not remember how to have the female section of the plug be the on the very end to plug into the wall became to much for me and I ended up with a garland and ornament tree only. I lied when people asked why I had no tree lights. I told them I had blown all the fuses and was waiting until after Christmas to get all new lights at a great price. When the truth was I had boxes and boxes of perfectly good tree lights in a tangled mess from tearing them off the tree more than half a dozen times that year. I even had myself convinced it was a light problem not a drinking problem.
PLENTY of lights this year and straight as an arrow.
Have a super day. Whoop whoop FRIDAY.
3AF/310 -
@CMB44512 Hugs. Alcohol made me not the best mom sometimes when my boys were in high school. To be the best mom, I would have been asking a bajillion questions a day. And then saying NO still, lol. One thing that has often gone through my mind is whether my kids would worry at all about leaving a grandchild with me. I don't want that to ever be a thing. Wonder if you've ever conveyed to her that you would not feel safe leaving a grandchild with her? And yes, I'm curious with @dawnbgethealthy what she's like during dry periods.
Um, I have to say, that dude looks kinda angry that he's drinking tea instead of something stronger, lol
@MissMay Brilliant insight! (See what I did there...brilliant...lights... ;-))
@globalhiker & @dawnbgethealthy ... Canada, ay? Ya know, @MissMay is even closer to the border than I. Who else is in these neck of the woods? Oh, we're headed to the cabin to intercept 18 inches of glorious snow tomorrow!
@CryingBlue & @brittgreenlikethecolor88 Way to go!
@Lilylady3k I can't begin to tell you how my father's finances unfolded after he died. It took like 4 years to get his will executed. You'd think he was a millionaire, but faaarrrrr from it. Though his alma mater thought he was. Years of unpaid taxes amongst other things. Good thing my stepmother died before that was discovered. Great you're taking care of this while she's here!
Dry Turkey to Santa Challenge - 7/7 days AF (not dry turkey..as in you need gravy)
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I too, @MissMay, would have a drink in one hand and an ornament or decoration in the other. My philosophy is : Make it enjoyable! I need to get the Christmas decor up, and last night I thought that if I had a drink, I could really get busy and drag all of the stuff out, I could have stayed up late and drank and decorated. BUT, I opted for an AF night, worked on a quilt and after coffee this morning, I will light the fire under myself and decorate!
I come from a long line of drinkers. My great grandmother, in the rest home, would get a good stiff drink handed to her by her son every evening. She lived to be 96 and was a lovely woman with all her wits. Her daughter, my grandmother, lived to be 94, drank like a fish, smoked for 50 years, and had all of her wits, all along. However, my mom and aunt rarely ever drank and had dementia and died in their early 70’s. That scares the poop out of me. My dad is still alive, drinks nightly, and is 83, is a civil engineer, still works, goes on a big hunting trip each fall, came home from that, went to the office, caught COVID, stayed home from work, got better and is back to work. At least I have some of his genes in me.
I started drinking in Jr.High. By the time I got to high school, it wasn’t that fun to drink. Drank some in college. Got married, DH cannot tolerate much alcohol. He has a beer, once a month. He will come home from work and say he was going to have a beer, but he has a headache. I tell him to take Advil and have a beer, that he will feel great. He would never do that.
I homeschooled 2 boys for 14 years, and I was always ready for a drink Friday night. As they got older, I needed one or more during the week. DH would come tired from work, go to bed early, I would stay up and drink. During that time, I had to move my mom out of the rotten situation she was in with her husband, I found assisted living for her. Moved her out, she died 1 1/2 years later, I had to have her house cleaned out and sold. That was an hour away, so I waited until I got home to drink from that each time.
DH, is a Type A personality, likes all, of his food home made, does not exercise, I do all of the yard work. I get tired of having to do everything around here. He doesn’t like how much I drink, so I have to sneak it. I am tired of living like this. I don’t want to drink alone anymore and I don’t want to wake up hung over. My quilting projects help keep me busy. I also got rollerblades and I absolutely have to be sober to skate around the outside of our house, so I save that for the end of the day. I can’t wait to have grandkids, that will be the best reason NOT to drink.
I am sorry for writing so much; I appreciate how truthful everyone else is.
Karen
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I am trying to cut back on my excessive wine drinking for health reasons. Seems I have too much iron in my blood which could lead to liver/pancreas disease along with other things. I have made a box of wine that I could usually consume in 4 or 5 days last 2 weeks. So, that is a beginning. I think the worst thing for me is the urge to drink as the afternoon grows later and the problem of being able to get to sleep. I have used my wine drinking as a sleeping pill for many years.6
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So far 7 AF days straight since Thanksgiving. I don't want to think about it too much because a little voice in my head is already yapping away at me saying that I deserve drinks this weekend for behaving so well. That little wine devil is back...
@Peach1948 so me too - it seems I always think about wine around 4 or 5pm. There must be some sort of hormonal dip at that time of day. That's when my "wine devil" starts talking. I've been able to shut him up if I eat and walk out of the kitchen and distract myself with TV. But if I stay in the kitchen and cook with a hungry stomach, my wine devil gets louder and more demanding.6 -
@AR10at50 thank you for sharing all of that. So much that I can relate to.
@globalhiker I have that same little wine devil and a vodka devil running around in my head. Both are screaming at me to get a drink, but I really want to make my 21 days AF. Today is day 4. It's also going to be a long lonely week for me. Husband is working crazy hours and won't be off till next week and already talking about working extras. ( medical field and covid is hitting the area hard)5 -
Dang it... another stressful day yesterday due to car troubles. An AF night did not happen. Hoping next week will be better. Definetly not giving up!!!
2 AF days / 4 day
Goal: 5 AF days / 7 days6 -
New home for the thread, but the same goals for me, 16-20 AF days per month.
Tuesday December 01 - AF - Super long and stressful work day, I really wanted a drink when I finally got home, but over the past months I have been trying to "save up" my drinking days for happy occasions, not to relieve stress. Planning AF for tomorrow also.
Wednesday December 02 - AF - I think that this might be my 4th AF day in a row.
Thursday December 03 - Drinks. Work Stress drinks. I had just finished saying that I was trying not to do that. Instead of my usual 3, I had 2. It took the edge off. The 2 drinks prevented me from quitting this one particular job outright (I am a Merchandiser and work for several companies). I will sleep on it.
Friday December 04 - AF - Had to use resistance and a few 6 minute waits to not have a drink. I walked across the ice today of that bird sanctuary that I have posted a few times. Skating there tomorrow for sure! Photos from my lake walk to come later because I can't help it : - )
Rolling total: 3AF days out of 4 days4 -
Last day I think ... almost through my to do list with mom. Long drives to get things done (remember at the camp a grocery store is 20 miles ... so Best Buy is 45 miles). Anyway got mom's iPhone fixed, finished moving all the bills over to consolidated bank acct, talked to insurance guy about her medicare supplement (last day for changes this year was today), updating and syncing passwords for EVERYTHING, yep her Facebook acct had been hacked so fixing that, and then all the other things that needed to be done.
We found a very nice bottle Chardonnay of wine in mom's stash this evening to go with the chicken breast I made stuffed with asparagus and mozzarella
Dec accountability: 0/4 days AF
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brittgreenlikethecolor88 wrote: »Definetly not giving up!!!
I agree!!! Checking in and not giving up!!!1 -
mainelylisa wrote: »@Lilylady3k I can't begin to tell you how my father's finances unfolded after he died. It took like 4 years to get his will executed. You'd think he was a millionaire, but faaarrrrr from it. Though his alma mater thought he was. Years of unpaid taxes amongst other things. Good thing my stepmother died before that was discovered. Great you're taking care of this while she's here!
It is amazing what you uncover! Her husband paid no bills and had no money and no will. It is her home ... inherited from her father. I cannot believe what had to be done to close his accts and other stuff. I mean the ambulance service wanted his signature ... I called to explain that he died ... how do you want to handle this without his signature???? I cannot believe the number of checking accts and credit cards and how unorganized my mom is. I mean just grabbing a book of checks to write a check ... not knowing which acct or following check number order (3 checkbooks for the same acct + 2 others for 2 other accts). The biggest thing was budget ... trying to figure out if she had enough money to actually pay all her bills and still buy groceries each month. There is no savings account. Opened her a savings account for the first time in 30 years to help save for emergencies. She has not paid taxes in years! But then there is no money. I took on some of the bills. My sister others. My brother still asks her for money ARGHHH. I cannot believe that 1/3 of her social security check goes to medical insurance. And then the rest to car and home insurance. She is living off the extra money I've been giving her each month since 2017. So things are really tight for her. BUT I did figure out how to get her poker game into to the budget. She was happy. And she really enjoyed me cooking dinner every night.10 -
I am trying to cut back on my excessive wine drinking for health reasons. Seems I have too much iron in my blood which could lead to liver/pancreas disease along with other things. I have made a box of wine that I could usually consume in 4 or 5 days last 2 weeks. So, that is a beginning. I think the worst thing for me is the urge to drink as the afternoon grows later and the problem of being able to get to sleep. I have used my wine drinking as a sleeping pill for many years.
Wonderful progress on the box wine!! Congrats. I too use to use wine as my sleeping aid but then realized while I fell asleep I was not nearly restful ... waking up many times during the night. This week my focus was fewer drinks per evening. Looking forward to less stress next week ... and more AF days.6 -
Didn't make it last night. Remembered there was a leftover bottle of red from Thanksgiving that I knew husband wouldn't miss. Drank the whole thing before dinner was even done. Ended up with a migraine a few hours later. Karma I guess.8
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So glad that those who are missing their mark a bit are still here and not giving up!
Day 8 AF. Got to the cabin today and really did want a drink. There is wine and beer galore. But shoved it aside and asked myself why. No good answer. DH asked, as I was applying my estrogen therapy stuff to my wrist, "Is that the stuff that makes your pants fall off?" I said, "No, that would be alcohol." I do get a lot more frisky with alcohol, so guess I have to figure out why that is.8 -
LMAO at @mainelylisa's post. A bit of humor and lightheartedness goes a long way.
Still working on my challenge...it's to enjoy life with less alcohol. Most days it's easier to nail the no alcohol than it is to enjoy life and be happy, with no job. I am working on being kind to myself and trying to get my "life balance" right.
I have "holes" in my life I need to fill with happy things that don't contain toxins or calories, if you get my drift.
New puppy still sounding like good solution.......
Hugs for everyone. Major tough year but we're doing it. Today I will limit my screen time, search for the next best BBQ chicken recipe for tonight, and LMAO some more on the next best Netflix show I can find.
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New home for the thread, but the same goals for me, 16-20 AF days per month.
Tuesday December 01 - AF - Super long and stressful work day, I really wanted a drink when I finally got home, but over the past months I have been trying to "save up" my drinking days for happy occasions, not to relieve stress. Planning AF for tomorrow also.
Wednesday December 02 - AF - I think that this might be my 4th AF day in a row.
Thursday December 03 - Drinks. Work Stress drinks. I had just finished saying that I was trying not to do that. Instead of my usual 3, I had 2. It took the edge off. The 2 drinks prevented me from quitting this one particular job outright (I am a Merchandiser and work for several companies). I will sleep on it.
Friday December 04 - AF - Had to use resistance and a few 6 minute waits to not have a drink. I walked across the ice today of that bird sanctuary that I have posted a few times. Skating there tomorrow for sure! Photos from my lake walk to come later because I can't help it : - )
Saturday December 05 - Drinks. Skated on a lake today!!! Wondrous!! A friend joined me and then we had cocoa with peppermint schnapps after.
Rolling total: 3AF days out of 5 days5 -
@Lilylady3k
Wow, you are going through so much with your Mom.
I am so glad that you are there for her.3 -
@globalhiker
Puppies are so cute.
None of us can travel anywhere for awhile, but once we can again, what to do with a puppy?
What kind of puppy were you thinking? Golden Retriever?
Maybe you should get a Saint Bernard that you can take up to the mountains with you. You could put a keg of brandy under his/her neck should you get stranded in the snow somewhere.
As for that hole, yeah. A bunch of soul searching to do about that for many of us, the hole that we have filled with snacks and booze : - )
You will figure it out, and then you can teach the rest of us : - )
Meantime, lets all just get outside for at least 10 minutes per day.4 -
Out on the ice. A bit bumpy in spots, but still skate-able
Lots of inlets to skate in and around
Me in my Detroit Red Wings toque very happy and getting ready to go out to skate
No photos of me on the ice, but this is my friend who is not really a skater but loves the out of doors. I gave her a stick to help her to balance. We had a really good time.
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