What's on your mind?

1247024712473247524763000

Replies

  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    So... I was raised by a single mom who was awesome and did her very best. When I was 12, I asked who my father was and she told me that it was a girl that I went to school with's dad. She told me never to tell because there was no sense in disrupting their family with something we could not prove.

    When I got older she told me this story: She began dating a cop who worked night shifts and spent much of his time with her during the day. He told her that he was married but split up from his wife. She found out that she was pregnant with me, and he split saying it wasn't his and that he was going to stay with his wife. Whatever, a few years later, my mom decides to go for child support and the court orders him to take a paternity test. My mom gets the results and it says he is not the father--- but she couldn't figure out how that could be. In those days, the courts kept photos of the testers, and when my mom went to check who had taken the test, she saw that it was not actually him. Someone else had used his ID and smudged his fingerprints and because he was a cop, he was able to get away with it. My mom didn't have the means to keep fighting it, and so she just let it be.

    10 years ago, I reached out to him on FB just to give him a chance. My mom really had no reason to lie to me, unless one of her bff's husbands fathered me lol -- which I highly doubt. He basically said my mom was a liar and had slept with everyone under the sun.

    10 years later, 23andMe and ancestry are finding alllll kinds of DNA connections, and guess who just ordered a kit. ME!!!! So here's to possibly getting some form of justice for my mom or finding out my mom has lead a much more interesting life than what we imagined!

    It's super nosy of me but now I wanna know the results 🙈 I'd bet on your momma
    Me too lol! It will only show me if one of the family members have taken the test too. Being as my mom was kind of excited for me to get the test, I’d say she doesn’t have anything to hide. But either way would be win/win. It would be nice to know, especially for family health history. We wouldn’t try to stir up any family drama with them though. I probably wouldn’t reach out to his family (maybe just him) because it really isn’t their fault. He has been married now for like 35 years and has 3 kids and based on his fb, he is dad of the year to them.
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    Enjoying my post-dinner cookie and coffee (these Dutch Christmas cookies are awesome and look like cute star ornaments!) and realizing that my walk tonight is gonna be cooooooooooooooold. :confounded:
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    Enjoying my post-dinner cookie and coffee (these Dutch Christmas cookies are awesome and look like cute star ornaments!) and realizing that my walk tonight is gonna be cooooooooooooooold. :confounded:

    Are these those cookies that come in that round blue tin that grandmas all over the world store all their sewing stuff, or no??

    Lol, no.. but butter cookies *are* awesome and I am always disappointed when it's sewing crap (even my own) and not actually a tin of cookies.

    A TIN OF LIES is what it is.

    These are:

    Cinnamon-White-Chocolate-Star-Cookies-2-768x768.jpg
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    Enjoying my post-dinner cookie and coffee (these Dutch Christmas cookies are awesome and look like cute star ornaments!) and realizing that my walk tonight is gonna be cooooooooooooooold. :confounded:

    Are these those cookies that come in that round blue tin that grandmas all over the world store all their sewing stuff, or no??

    Lol, no.. but butter cookies *are* awesome and I am always disappointed when it's sewing crap (even my own) and not actually a tin of cookies.

    A TIN OF LIES is what it is.

    These are:

    Cinnamon-White-Chocolate-Star-Cookies-2-768x768.jpg

    I've never seen these before.

    Those danish butter cookies are actually my weakness. I can't tell you how many times I've such in people's pantries only to.bw disappointed by thimbles and other sewing paraphernalia.

    Why is anyone keeping their sewing stuff in a pantry for food though??

    Otherwise, yes.. ultra disappointment. Tellin' ya, a tin of lies.
  • Miz_Owl
    Miz_Owl Posts: 3,026 Member
    Dear puppy whining at the bottom of the steps

    I bought you that 20.00 donut bed for you so you feels safe and comfortable sleeping alone just because I let you sleep in my bed on the weekends doesn't mean you get to sleep with me on Monday or any other day of the week until you learn it's not okay to lick my face at 2 a.m. you also snore and have puppy nightmares not to mention the heat that radiates from you making me feel like I'm having hot flashes now sleep

    Aww .
    Dogs 🐕 are social animals, dogs hate being left alone. In fact, the most common of dog fears is separation anxiety.
  • Miz_Owl
    Miz_Owl Posts: 3,026 Member
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Dear puppy whining at the bottom of the steps

    I bought you that 20.00 donut bed for you so you feels safe and comfortable sleeping alone just because I let you sleep in my bed on the weekends doesn't mean you get to sleep with me on Monday or any other day of the week until you learn it's not okay to lick my face at 2 a.m. you also snore and have puppy nightmares not to mention the heat that radiates from you making me feel like I'm having hot flashes now sleep

    Aww .
    Dogs 🐕 are social animals, dogs hate being left alone. In fact, the most common of dog fears is separation anxiety.

    Strangely enough...he decided a few months ago that he wanted to be a "big boy" and sleep downstairs, he used to have a bed next to mine.

    NVM, now I've got guilty mommy syndrome...omw to get him.

    I bet he's happy now . <3
    p021jjxghl4m.gif
  • Miz_Owl
    Miz_Owl Posts: 3,026 Member
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Dear puppy whining at the bottom of the steps

    I bought you that 20.00 donut bed for you so you feels safe and comfortable sleeping alone just because I let you sleep in my bed on the weekends doesn't mean you get to sleep with me on Monday or any other day of the week until you learn it's not okay to lick my face at 2 a.m. you also snore and have puppy nightmares not to mention the heat that radiates from you making me feel like I'm having hot flashes now sleep

    Aww .
    Dogs 🐕 are social animals, dogs hate being left alone. In fact, the most common of dog fears is separation anxiety.

    Strangely enough...he decided a few months ago that he wanted to be a "big boy" and sleep downstairs, he used to have a bed next to mine.

    NVM, now I've got guilty mommy syndrome...omw to get him.

    I bet he's happy now . <3
    p021jjxghl4m.gif

    Don't judge his hoodie 😂

    3g04079vte9q.jpg

    So adorable 🥰
  • _MovesLikeJabba_
    _MovesLikeJabba_ Posts: 152 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    So... I was raised by a single mom who was awesome and did her very best. When I was 12, I asked who my father was and she told me that it was a girl that I went to school with's dad. She told me never to tell because there was no sense in disrupting their family with something we could not prove.

    When I got older she told me this story: She began dating a cop who worked night shifts and spent much of his time with her during the day. He told her that he was married but split up from his wife. She found out that she was pregnant with me, and he split saying it wasn't his and that he was going to stay with his wife. Whatever, a few years later, my mom decides to go for child support and the court orders him to take a paternity test. My mom gets the results and it says he is not the father--- but she couldn't figure out how that could be. In those days, the courts kept photos of the testers, and when my mom went to check who had taken the test, she saw that it was not actually him. Someone else had used his ID and smudged his fingerprints and because he was a cop, he was able to get away with it. My mom didn't have the means to keep fighting it, and so she just let it be.

    10 years ago, I reached out to him on FB just to give him a chance. My mom really had no reason to lie to me, unless one of her bff's husbands fathered me lol -- which I highly doubt. He basically said my mom was a liar and had slept with everyone under the sun.

    10 years later, 23andMe and ancestry are finding alllll kinds of DNA connections, and guess who just ordered a kit. ME!!!! So here's to possibly getting some form of justice for my mom or finding out my mom has lead a much more interesting life than what we imagined!

    It's super nosy of me but now I wanna know the results 🙈 I'd bet on your momma
    Me too lol! It will only show me if one of the family members have taken the test too. Being as my mom was kind of excited for me to get the test, I’d say she doesn’t have anything to hide. But either way would be win/win. It would be nice to know, especially for family health history. We wouldn’t try to stir up any family drama with them though. I probably wouldn’t reach out to his family (maybe just him) because it really isn’t their fault. He has been married now for like 35 years and has 3 kids and based on his fb, he is dad of the year to them.

    I wouldn't even begin to know what to do in that situation. Does 23andMe update the other family members if there's a new match? I honestly don't know how the programs really work. In any case, I'm sure whatever decision you'll make will be the best for you and your mom. Good luck!
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Dear puppy whining at the bottom of the steps

    I bought you that 20.00 donut bed for you so you feels safe and comfortable sleeping alone just because I let you sleep in my bed on the weekends doesn't mean you get to sleep with me on Monday or any other day of the week until you learn it's not okay to lick my face at 2 a.m. you also snore and have puppy nightmares not to mention the heat that radiates from you making me feel like I'm having hot flashes now sleep

    Aww .
    Dogs 🐕 are social animals, dogs hate being left alone. In fact, the most common of dog fears is separation anxiety.

    Strangely enough...he decided a few months ago that he wanted to be a "big boy" and sleep downstairs, he used to have a bed next to mine.

    NVM, now I've got guilty mommy syndrome...omw to get him.

    Total Lady and the Tramp moment. :joy:

    original.gif
  • eatpolerepeat
    eatpolerepeat Posts: 25,653 Member
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Dear puppy whining at the bottom of the steps

    I bought you that 20.00 donut bed for you so you feels safe and comfortable sleeping alone just because I let you sleep in my bed on the weekends doesn't mean you get to sleep with me on Monday or any other day of the week until you learn it's not okay to lick my face at 2 a.m. you also snore and have puppy nightmares not to mention the heat that radiates from you making me feel like I'm having hot flashes now sleep

    Aww .
    Dogs 🐕 are social animals, dogs hate being left alone. In fact, the most common of dog fears is separation anxiety.

    Strangely enough...he decided a few months ago that he wanted to be a "big boy" and sleep downstairs, he used to have a bed next to mine.

    NVM, now I've got guilty mommy syndrome...omw to get him.

    I bet he's happy now . <3
    p021jjxghl4m.gif

    Don't judge his hoodie 😂

    3g04079vte9q.jpg

    Omg, he's so adorable 😍
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,722 Member
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Miz_Owl wrote: »
    Dear puppy whining at the bottom of the steps

    I bought you that 20.00 donut bed for you so you feels safe and comfortable sleeping alone just because I let you sleep in my bed on the weekends doesn't mean you get to sleep with me on Monday or any other day of the week until you learn it's not okay to lick my face at 2 a.m. you also snore and have puppy nightmares not to mention the heat that radiates from you making me feel like I'm having hot flashes now sleep

    Aww .
    Dogs 🐕 are social animals, dogs hate being left alone. In fact, the most common of dog fears is separation anxiety.

    Strangely enough...he decided a few months ago that he wanted to be a "big boy" and sleep downstairs, he used to have a bed next to mine.

    NVM, now I've got guilty mommy syndrome...omw to get him.

    I bet he's happy now . <3
    p021jjxghl4m.gif

    Don't judge his hoodie 😂

    3g04079vte9q.jpg

    So adorable 🥰

    Yes completely adorable! How can you NOT let him cuddle up cozy next to you??? :)
  • GymGoddessGoals
    GymGoddessGoals Posts: 2,146 Member
    Revolu7 wrote: »
    Yeah, giving my DNA to "companies" sounds like a great idea. Just government fronts to build your replacement clone and erase your independent thinking original self. No thanks...😉

    or harvest your vital organs for some billionaire loser who is afraid of dying.
  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    MaltedTea wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    So... I was raised by a single mom who was awesome and did her very best. When I was 12, I asked who my father was and she told me that it was a girl that I went to school with's dad. She told me never to tell because there was no sense in disrupting their family with something we could not prove.

    When I got older she told me this story: She began dating a cop who worked night shifts and spent much of his time with her during the day. He told her that he was married but split up from his wife. She found out that she was pregnant with me, and he split saying it wasn't his and that he was going to stay with his wife. Whatever, a few years later, my mom decides to go for child support and the court orders him to take a paternity test. My mom gets the results and it says he is not the father--- but she couldn't figure out how that could be. In those days, the courts kept photos of the testers, and when my mom went to check who had taken the test, she saw that it was not actually him. Someone else had used his ID and smudged his fingerprints and because he was a cop, he was able to get away with it. My mom didn't have the means to keep fighting it, and so she just let it be.

    10 years ago, I reached out to him on FB just to give him a chance. My mom really had no reason to lie to me, unless one of her bff's husbands fathered me lol -- which I highly doubt. He basically said my mom was a liar and had slept with everyone under the sun.

    10 years later, 23andMe and ancestry are finding alllll kinds of DNA connections, and guess who just ordered a kit. ME!!!! So here's to possibly getting some form of justice for my mom or finding out my mom has lead a much more interesting life than what we imagined!

    It's super nosy of me but now I wanna know the results 🙈 I'd bet on your momma
    Me too lol! It will only show me if one of the family members have taken the test too. Being as my mom was kind of excited for me to get the test, I’d say she doesn’t have anything to hide. But either way would be win/win. It would be nice to know, especially for family health history. We wouldn’t try to stir up any family drama with them though. I probably wouldn’t reach out to his family (maybe just him) because it really isn’t their fault. He has been married now for like 35 years and has 3 kids and based on his fb, he is dad of the year to them.

    As someone whose father is a Reformed Womanizer who showed her what a good dad (but horrid husband) can be like, I'd rethink not approaching the family. From one woman, my dad denies fathering two of three children to this day. Sir, we ALL look the same 🤨

    So consider surfacing the results. Otherwise your proposed father's children would be missing out on a sibling: you.

    All the best to you and your mother, no matter the results.

    This is definitely insightful!

    I would hope that maybe they knew he was a little crazier in his younger days and became a better husband over time. That way it would be more like...."Oh cool, dad had a love child back in his crazy days".... rather than a life altering view of him that explodes their family. Since I don't know any of them, I can't really say.

    I think it just depends on the results. I would at least try to have a conversation with him about it first. Not so much because he deserves it, but because I think it would be the wisest approach.
  • breefoshee
    breefoshee Posts: 398 Member
    breefoshee wrote: »
    breefoshee wrote: »
    So... I was raised by a single mom who was awesome and did her very best. When I was 12, I asked who my father was and she told me that it was a girl that I went to school with's dad. She told me never to tell because there was no sense in disrupting their family with something we could not prove.

    When I got older she told me this story: She began dating a cop who worked night shifts and spent much of his time with her during the day. He told her that he was married but split up from his wife. She found out that she was pregnant with me, and he split saying it wasn't his and that he was going to stay with his wife. Whatever, a few years later, my mom decides to go for child support and the court orders him to take a paternity test. My mom gets the results and it says he is not the father--- but she couldn't figure out how that could be. In those days, the courts kept photos of the testers, and when my mom went to check who had taken the test, she saw that it was not actually him. Someone else had used his ID and smudged his fingerprints and because he was a cop, he was able to get away with it. My mom didn't have the means to keep fighting it, and so she just let it be.

    10 years ago, I reached out to him on FB just to give him a chance. My mom really had no reason to lie to me, unless one of her bff's husbands fathered me lol -- which I highly doubt. He basically said my mom was a liar and had slept with everyone under the sun.

    10 years later, 23andMe and ancestry are finding alllll kinds of DNA connections, and guess who just ordered a kit. ME!!!! So here's to possibly getting some form of justice for my mom or finding out my mom has lead a much more interesting life than what we imagined!

    It's super nosy of me but now I wanna know the results 🙈 I'd bet on your momma
    Me too lol! It will only show me if one of the family members have taken the test too. Being as my mom was kind of excited for me to get the test, I’d say she doesn’t have anything to hide. But either way would be win/win. It would be nice to know, especially for family health history. We wouldn’t try to stir up any family drama with them though. I probably wouldn’t reach out to his family (maybe just him) because it really isn’t their fault. He has been married now for like 35 years and has 3 kids and based on his fb, he is dad of the year to them.

    I wouldn't even begin to know what to do in that situation. Does 23andMe update the other family members if there's a new match? I honestly don't know how the programs really work. In any case, I'm sure whatever decision you'll make will be the best for you and your mom. Good luck!

    I don't know either! It could be that no one in his family has taken it... but if a cousin or aunt or anything like that was on there, it would show up.