WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2023

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Replies

  • LisaInArkansas
    LisaInArkansas Posts: 2,950 Member
    Oh, Barbara... when it rains it pours, dear heart! Hope all comes out well with everything.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,687 Member
    grandmallie wrote: »
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    Not a bad view from the solarium pool deck.. but look at the ankles this is using the scooter and not eating a ton of salt.

    Have you got compression stocking with you?
  • ginnytez
    ginnytez Posts: 1,411 Member
    Barbara AHMOD-all I could think was "My Word." No need to collapse until you know what each thing is. This is actually a pretty good time to get a new laptop. If you like apple they have some good deals on Macs. Early Christmas present?
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,355 Member
    316316
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,145 Member
    Machka yes I wore them down on the plane.. will put them back on in the morning..
  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 3,253 Member
    edited August 2023
    SophieRosieMom wrote: »


    Debbie - your cashew chicken sounds wonderful. Question. Was your MIL always a pill or has she gotten worse in the recent years? Reason is - has she been diagnosed with any form of dementia? I was thinking about her behavior with saying she'll eat this and that you make then changing her mind. My DH was like that during the last year of his life. Is she losing weight? Any progress on moving her into a residence of some type?



    Ok ladies, I've been at this for a few hours now (took a lunch and chicken visit break).

    Collette my cleaner came this morning. Rosie and I normally go in the office and let her do her thing with the door closed. I decided to write a long letter to a friend I haven't seen in years, fill her in on DH's death last year, what I'm up to now, etc.

    When Collette was finished, she tapped on the door and said the strangest thing happened when she was vacuuming in the back room. She said she smelled cigarette smoke, just like DH used to smell. Once in a while, I smell it too. I told her about that time she smelled it, I was writing to my friend about him. I have given away or at least thoroughly washed his jackets and clothing he used to wear, so????

    We both got the shivers. It actually kind of gave me a good feeling.

    Lanette B)
    SW WA State

    Dinner turned out great. Only small comment from the guys was there wasn't enough chicken. I had the pan full of veggies so not much room for the chicken(plus I just used one of the packs of frozen meat that was already marinated).

    As for MIL- she has always been like this. On holidays when I would cook food and take it over to the house to go with what she had made, what ever I made she refused to try it and got so mad when FIL would try and really enjoy what I made..
    Since her accident and she needed us to take care of her, she has gotten very demanding. She liked everyone waiting on her hand and foot. She wants things done for her that she is more than capable of doing for her self now.
    At first she was fine with eating things I made and thanked me, then she started where she only wanted store bought food(like deli stuff), then she wanted all restaurant food- fast food was ok but she liked food from a regular place or Denny's. Now, she doesn't even want fast food. She complains about everything dh picks up for her. Her latest is not eating anything he does bring over. Such a huge waste. If he doesn't bring stuff she is mad and if he does she doesn't eat it. She doesn't want healthy stuff but boy, take a few cookies over and they are gone.
    She complains about cooking(she wants to cook) that we have had to go all over town to get what she wants, then complains that he doesn't want to take any home because she made too much. After listening to her gripe and complain, he says she yells at him, he doesn't feel like eating anything, let alone her food.
    No word on moving her. Her doctor tried to explain to her that it is best for her to stay where she is. DH was able to tell the doctor exactly how she is, about the constant verbal abuse and about not having any help. They are supposed to help him with that but he has his doubts. They called him and all they wanted to talk to him about was DNR and trusts/wills/etc
    She has that . He needs help getting some help taking care of her and support to deal with her.
    She was terrible to him all last week, he says she is taking it out on him because he was gone last Sunday. I went over to make sure she had her pills for the evening and he had the morning ones ready for her. She didn't need that help. She did it on her own and he told me today that she has done her own pills(he has them set up in the pill case for each day) for the past 5 days.

    Lanette- that is cool about the smell from his cigerettes. A little reminder that he is still there.
    Seeing/smelling those reminders are very special.


  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,355 Member
    317317
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,701 Member
    Debbie - you get the patience award. I'm glad we are here for you. I know you hate to see your DH going through all of this. As you mentioned earlier - if I'm remembering right - his brother passed away? And she said the wrong one died? Gosh. My mom was never demanding like that but my brother always seemed to act without question, like a dutiful son, my sis and I would hold back and analyze the situation to see if what she wanted done was necessary. Might have been the daughter/mom thing, lol.

    Ginny - I am hoping you can get the inflammation settled down. I know you love to walk and sounds like you have safe areas to walk in, that's so important. 77 degrees seems more tolerable.

    Annie - your dad is made of strong stuff, especially if walking around with a fracture. I admire the way you can set your worry and concern about your folks aside and tend to your exercise regime, yoga, etc.

    Lisa - I'll bet anything Egg planned her sudden "nice kitty" act and cozying up to Johnny. :p

    Cindy - Schnauzer rescue! They are made of sturdy stuff, lol. My little Schnauzer Rosie turned 6 not long ago and is finally calming down. My DH was the alpha dog here in the house and after he passed away last year, she and I have been competing for the title.

    Barbara - ((((HUGS))))) all that stuff hitting the fan at once. I know you're a problem solver and will get things worked out. Good job getting the skeleton mix violas!

    Have a good evening, ladies!

    Lanette B)
    SW WA State

  • exermom
    exermom Posts: 6,554 Member
    Went for my walk then Vince said we should cut the grass since the weather forecast is for rain tomorrow. Came in and had dinner then worked on the jigsaw puzzle

    Jess called and said that she’d be here Fri since she had a dentist appt at 9:15 but she’s going back since she’s on call

    Sue – I find that I can only work on the puzzle for about an hour at a time. After that, it seems I keep trying to put the pieces in the same places even tho I know they don’t go there. I have a timer next to the puzzle.

    Lanette – there really aren’t that many stores I can walk to. I have to cross one mildly busy road, then I walk on people’s lawns. I can go to one food store, a dollar store, the vet and if I cross that street two times I can go to another dollar store, but I don’t go there much. Otherwise, I try to at least get in a walk around the neighborhood. Especially since I started working, I needed to do my exercising first thing or it doesn’t get done. I also like to work first thing so that I’m out of their way when they get busy at lunch time. So the exercising takes a back seat.

    Barbara – here’s hoping that tomorrow is better than today. It can’t get worse, huh????

    Well, off to bed.

    Michele NC
  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,727 Member
    <3
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    Lanette - I forgot to say that your teleported comment reminded me that we were in Vulcan on Sunday. We didn’t stop anywhere cool though.

    Tracey
  • skuehn48
    skuehn48 Posts: 3,071 Member
    <3
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,687 Member
    grandmallie wrote: »
    Machka yes I wore them down on the plane.. will put them back on in the morning..

    I like wearing mine in the evening, when I am relaxing at the end of the day with my feet propped up.

    It might only be an hour or so then but it seems to help.

    M in Oz
  • Anniesquats100
    Anniesquats100 Posts: 3,306 Member
    Barbara thinking about you! Hope today is a better day!
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,355 Member
    318318
  • teklawa1
    teklawa1 Posts: 678 Member
    :)
    Betsy in NW WA
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,665 Member
    KJLaMore wrote: »
    Flea- Here is the brief synopsis written by my brother about Fern and her family.

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    Very nice. Thank your brother for me, and thank you for passing the mystery on for me.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley OR
  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 3,253 Member
    Good morning-
    Up early. Have my video conference call or what ever you call it. Second part of the product test I did two weeks ago. Now a 90 min"meeting" to chat about our experience with the product. Logged on so I am just waiting for it to start. Will make myself a second cup of tea just before it starts. Asthma is acting up a bit so hopefully that stops before the call starts.
    No other plans for the day until class tonight.
    Dh told his mom he is working(last night shift-midnight to 9AM-his usual Wed. shift) but he is actually on vacation this week. So told her he wasn't coming over this morning. He finally gets to sleep in so I will be very quiet, not that he will hear anything anyways-very sound sleeper, Let him sleep as long as he wants or at least rest.
  • cyntdooley
    cyntdooley Posts: 61 Member
    ginnytez wrote: »
    Rebecca - very smart going off antidepressants slowly. Hope your critters are gone for good!

    Lisa-thanks for the foot tips. I wear custom orthotics. I just ordered a house slipper with some support to stop walking barefoot (I like enclosed heels, no flopping when I walk due to hips). Stretches last couple of days had me sore. Took steroids this morning, inflammation may be settling, too soon to tell. Am going to go for short walk here in a bit since I didn't make it this am.

    Machka-not certain I have that sort of toe dexterity any more! I do have a foot roller I use and have order a half foam for some foot/ankle exercises.

    Allie-great ocean pics. Keep an eye on that swelling-if it gets worse check with doctor on ship.

    Kylia-have they had you on antibiotics for sores before this? Maybe this will knock it out. And I think your husband wishing you Happy Anniversary when he woke up is sweet (even if annoying).

    Kim-I hope you are able to keep Levi calm. He sounds like such a sweet dog. A toddler bed rail guard should do the trick.

    Heather-sounds like you may be writing about your essence.

    Rita-I also thought they only did one eye at a time-maybe because of the distance they do one one day and one the next. Cataract surgery has come a very long way. I have heard some people's vision really improves.

    Lanette-I don't question such things. They don't happen often-sometimes they just let us know they check in (that's what I think).

    Made it through my two meetings today. One, which was a teams meeting, I started listening to on my phone because I had trouble logging in. Logged out of Teams on computer and got into meeting so I could watch slide show. I said nothing during the meeting, just enjoyed listening and learning from others. Afternoon meeting I needed to talk more due to topic, but other's comments were also very interesting. Good meeting day.

    My lazy cats are on the rug in living room laying in the patch of late afternoon sunlight. They are actually fairly close to each other, less than two feet.

    Outside temp is 77 with very tolerable humidity. Last night when I went to store there was that edge of fall in the air. Going for short walk to see how foot is.

    Take care all,

    Ginny in Ohio

    Jealous of the cool Temps. I will say the morning breeze for our bike ride in the heat very nice.
  • cyntdooley
    cyntdooley Posts: 61 Member
    OregonMother wrote: »
    KJLaMore wrote: »
    Flea- Here is the brief synopsis written by my brother about Fern and her family.

    mr3l320izy6f.jpg
    96d1s6qc2dvh.jpg

    Very nice. Thank your brother for me, and thank you for passing the mystery on for me.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley OR

    Very interesting. I saw a post somewhere that the current generation is not as in tune with their grandparents or great grandparents. History of family and spending time with family is so important. Thanks for sharing.
    Cindy from Pensacola
  • kevrit
    kevrit Posts: 4,387 Member
    Recommended exercise: cardio 5 days 30 min 15/23
    Strength all muscles 2 x 1/8 a week
    Flexible (yoga, stretching) 1/8 a week 10 min
    Balance 5 days 10 min 4/20


    2023- Altruistic August

    Word of the year: appreciate. Today I appreciate a full night’s sleep.



    Meditation: daily. 26/31 (82%(started Feb)(94%,100%, 74%, 93%,100%)

    Walking and exercising slowed down because of record heat this month. Had bad asthma attack sending me to ER. Blood pressure very high making me tired.

    Rita
    Stop B12
    Switch DHEA to every other day on sept 6
    Kev
    Add folic acid, once a day
    Add magnesium to 3x a day
    Up Berberine to 3x a day

    1. cut back drinking and limit to 2 days a week. 7/8–(300%)
    2. Average 7,000 steps a week. 5418,4157,6745,7029,6938,(7,700,100%-9851,100%-9526,100%-9,559,100%, -8347,100%—7465,100%—6328,90%)
    3. Update budget every 2 weeks 3/2 —(800%)
    4. Contact close family every week (4x) 175/208—(733%) should be 172 by October 1)
    5. Contact Donat and sibs once a month (8x)72/94 (800%)
    6. Weigh less last day of month compared to first until I reach 140. Start at 178.6,176,174.2,173.4,175.4,174,175.6 (500%)
    7. Develop a journaling practice by aiming to journal at least 5 days a week. 20/22 (681%)
    8. Read 12 books at least this year. 31/12 (100%)
    9. Pay off credit card debt by January 2024 by making monthly payments to NDR/Reach Financial 8/12—(800%)
    10. Continue building emergency fund at SLFCU (min$25 a month)$25+$25+$71+700+25+25 +25+25 (800%)
    11. April started putting 4% on income in savings. 700,200,200, 107, 157,(500%)

    January Met —100%
    February met —-90%
    March met met —-90%
    April met——86.36%
    May met——-89%
    June met—-99%
    July met — met 81%
    August met
    September met
    October met —
    November met—
    December met—


    1. Set an intention to be kind to others (and yourself) this month. I plan to be kind to people I meet and to myself. Not just this month but all the time. It may not be every time, but I will try.
    2. Send an uplifting message to someone you can’t be with. I will text my best friend who lives in Michigan, and my friend that lives in NY. Did this
    3. Be kind and supportive to everyone you interact with. I did this!
    4. Ask someone how they feel and really listen to their reply. I plan to try to remember to do this. Done!
    5. Spend time wishing for other people to be happy and well. Will meditate and do this through a loving-kindness meditation.
    6. Smile and be friendly to the people you see today. Will do!
    7. Give time to help a project or cause you care about. I volunteer at Bottomless Lakes State park and also belong to the ‘Friends of’ group and am on the board as secretary. Does this count?
    8. Make some tasty food for someone who will appreciate it. My DH does all the cooking. Perhaps i will look for something KETO to cook. Otherwise, we give food to our co-host often.
    9. Thank someone you’re grateful to and tell them why. I will!
    10. Check in with someone who may be lonely or feeling anxious. Checked in with my son.
    11. Share an encouraging news story to inspire others. Did this at ER when the diagnosis was given.
    12. Contact a friend to let them know you’re thinking of them. Did this yesterday and will do again today.
    13. No plans day! Be kind to yourself so you can be kind to others too. I need the rest!
    14. Take an actions to be kind to nature and care for our planet. Will do! Need to de-stress!
    15. If someone annoys you, be kind. Imagine how they may be feeling. I will try to put myself in the other person’s shoes. Did this again last night with a camper.
    16. Make a thoughtful gift as a surprise for someone. Will have to think about this! Did not do this. :(
    17. Be kind online. Share positive and supportive comments. Will do!
    18. Today, do something to make life easier for someone else. I did try to accommodate a camper.
    19. Be thankful for your food and the people who make it possible. I am.
    20. Look for the good in everyone you meet today. Sometimes that is hard but I am getting better at it. Maybe not right away but after I thought about the person’s reactions and what could cause it.
    21. Donate unused items, clothes, or food to help a local charity. I will have to think on this. Not planning on going to town today. Did not do this.
    22. Give people the gift of your full attention. I will try.
    23. Share an article, book, or podcast you find helpful. I do when I find something useful.
    24. Forgive someone who hurt you in the past. This one is hard. I will try to forgive my father.
    25. Give your time, energy, or attention to someone in need. Easy! I did that yesterday giving someone a campsite who didn’t know how to use the electronic means to reserve a site.
    26. Find a way to ‘pay it forward’ or support a good cause. I subscribed to a foundation newsletter.
    27. Notice when someone is down and try to brighten his day. (My DH’s birthday. He always gets depressed on this day. Worse this year as he turns 70 today). I’m going to try to brighten DH’s day.
    28. Have a friendly chat with someone you don’t know very well. I do this all the time with campers!
    29. Do something kind to help in your local community.
    30. Give away something to those who don’t have as much as you.
    31. Share Action for Happiness with other people today.

    RVRita in Roswell, NM

    The best predictor of the future or future behavior is the past. If until this point the relationships, hobby, friendship, job, etc. has not served you in any positive regard, it likely won't in the future.
    — YALDA SAFAI, MD, MPH
    A Word From Verywell
    Sunk cost fallacy can be tricky to wrap your head around, and it’s not without nuance. For more clarity in these complex decision-making moments, completely disregard how much you’ve already invested so that it doesn’t hold influence. Then, look at the facts.

    Are you satisfied? Have you repeatedly been met with dead ends? Is there still potential for a positive outcome if you continue investing your resources and energy? What are the benefits of walking away and opening a new door? These are the factors that should influence your decision rather than any previously sunk costs.

    “What can words do to me unless I take them to heart?”

    RVRita in Roswell, NM

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