WOMEN AGES 50+FOR MAY 2024

kevrit · May 18

The list of foods I’ve come up with that are OK for me to eat. It addresses Colitis, GERD, Diabetes, and Metabolic Acidosis (CKD), my food sensitivities: eggs, high fiber, ginger, milk, winter squash, shellfish, peppers-all colors (if you do not have sensitivities, you can eat these).

Avoid anything with *PHOS* in the name of an ingredient. No Colas, Dr. Pepper, Root Beer ok.

Proteins: 1 serving = 2-3 oz cooked meat, 1/3 cup beans, 1/4 cup nuts
Fish, chicken, turkey (both skinless), beef (lean), beans, lentils, nuts and seeds, duck (skinless) buffalo, rabbit, venison, lamb, pork

Grains: 1 serving= 1/2 cup cooked rice/noodles, or 1 slice of bread—ALL LOW FIBERS
White rice, white bread, English muffins, bagels, cold (Corn Flakes, Rice Krispies, Cherios), and hot (cream of rice, no oatmeal) crackers, pasta (white), flour tortillas

Fruits 1 serving= <200 mg of potassium per 1/2 cup fresh
Apples, applesauce, berries, grapes, all versions of oranges, pineapple, lemon, lime, plum, pear, peaches, cherries

Veggies 1 serving= <200 mg of potassium per 1 cup leafy —preferably cooked veggies
Broccoli, cauliflower, celery, carrots, onion, cabbage, kale, lettuce, asparagus, green beans, mushrooms, tomatoes, spinach, green peas, parsnip, sweet potato, plantain

Dairy 1 serving=1/2 cup milk, yogurt or 1 oz cheese
Low fat cheese
Almond milk
Rice milk

Fats 1 serving = 1 tbs. Or 1 oz.
olive oil, avocado oil, almond oil, coconut oil, MCT oil all kinds of nut oils, no animal fats, corn oil, vegetable oil, or canola oil.

I hope this helps somebody. I find the serving sizes kinda low, but they are they to lose weight. I’m trying but find I’m hungry on this. Probably need more proteins in my diet.

My macros are set at 30`% carbs, 55% fats, 15% protein. In looking at my last week, I’m getting too many carbs and not enough protein or fats. I’ve got to work on that. Adding MCT oil helps. And logging all through the day, not just the mornings will help me see where I’m lacking. I go through this every so often and need to stay with this as a way of life forever. If I eat enough fats and proteins, I don’t crave the sweets. Logging will give me an idea of where I’m lacking in my diet and deter the sugar cravings.

RVRita who is writing this as a way to be accountable!

kevrit · May 18

Today is: a good day!! Science and Nature are great, aren’t they?!!

RVRita in Roswell Where it is Topless at Bottomless Day!! (Jeeps only! Lol)

Anniesquats100 · May 18

Beth Wow. Such an adventure with your mom. She is lucky to have you advocate for her, even if it doesn't always work out ideally. You can't make the system perfect, just improve it here and there. Hope you get a break and some good sleep today. We are thinking of you!

Lisa glad your brother in law is in good shape.

Lanette last time my sister was here my dad was devastated by the funeral and all that. So he is a little better now, and trying to do things on his own which is a problem.

Lanette Lisa Beth and Margaret, thanks for your support. It really means a lot to me.

A friend from Dad's church said she could hide the car if we need that. I'm wondering if my cousin's daughter would want it for a wedding present. It's an old Toyota Camry, low mileage, not sure what it's worth. Anyway, taking my Dad's keys is the next step.

Annie in Delaware

SophieRosieMom · May 18

Annie - I drive an old Toyota Camry - 2004 LE with just over 80,000 miles, in great shape. I was just given an offer from Carmax for $3,880.

You can enter the info on your dad's car here: Edmunds.com/appraisal/

Prices can vary a lot by region. Good luck!

Lanette

Whidislander · May 18

Today I am simmering a roasted chicken carcass. That always gives me 2 or 3 quarts of broth. Both husband and I kind of attack the chicken when we get it home from the store. The only time he eats chicken is standing in the kitchen with a fork poking at the chicken breast like a vulture! I seem to have it for lunch. And that's really all I have. Its a messy lunch.😁. It still gives me chicken to make myself a chicken salad sandwich, and a couple salads with chicken. This afternoon husband will have a big mug of my chicken broth. I put a lot of turmeric, pepper and cayenne pepper in it. That's so good for our innards. At least when I have a mug my innards feel happy.
I have been drinking apple cider vinegar as well. Just a glug in my sparkling flavored water. This ACV has honey and cayenne pepper in it as well. Its a marvelous drink and satiating.
Well Monday we get our new floor fingers crossed! I want to get this bottom floor professionally cleaned (carpets and entry way) by Stanley Steamers. I also need to buy new pans for under our burners. Lastly, I want to have my oven professionally cleaned. I hate it, and I am sure its not been cleaned for some time, even before us.
Michele, one trick I use is use Crisco oil on the pan. I have a mini loaf pan, so its like a cupcake pan but are 8 mini loaves. I get in all the cracks and they never stick. I don't just make the pan surface shiny, there is a white coating, especially each corner.👍🏼
Well everyone have a nice weekend.🤗
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa

GodMomKim · May 18

Annie -

I would second someone's recommendation that you take walks with your dad. I also did some looking on amazon, and if he always takes his keys or wallet, there are air tags for tucking in his wallet or as a new key ring. And depending on where he is in his comprehension you do not need to explain it all, just you bought him a new key ring for fathers day.

If he takes his phone you can turn on the "Find My" app on both your phones so you can find him.

I am working with some (not as bad) issues with my mom and while sometimes I feel like I am lying- or manipulating the situation. BUT my counselor reminds me the the conductor of a orchestra is not manipulating the musicians - and we are not manipulating our loved ones we are conducting the situation for the best results.

DO not freak out at the prices I am listing in the following this is in California in the San Francisco Bay Area - many many places are substantially less expensive - But I felt like knowing the prices helped motivate me to look at all the other options.

Also I am concerned about your comment that a care facility is a something to look into in the fall. Maybe it is different there but here the better facilities have 6-18 month wait time for a room. And you have to be on the list with a down payment that time. Here the down payment is 2 months cost, at the one closest to me that is good, full dementia care facilities are $12-$23,000 per month. There is a good one about an hour drive for about $8,000 a month.

I am working on doing everything I can to keep my mom in her home as long as possible as that is a ton of money - luckily she has not gotten lost, just tired and has to sit often. She could be in just assisted living and I hope we can stay at that level, as then it is just (LOL) $5,000-$8,000 per month.

Smiles
Kim in N. California

OregonMother · May 18

Hugs to Beth and Annie especially. End of life details are so emotional anyway, even without the financial issues. I'm sorry you are navigating this for your parents.

Take care of yourselves.

Insurance approved a PET scan, the first in over two years. (We have been doing CT and Bone scans every six months.) It's scheduled for Tuesday and the scanxiety has already begun. PET can pick up more than CT so we will really see what's going on, if anything.

Flea
Willamette Valley OR

barbiecat · May 18

Annie, I have no advice (sage or otherwise) but I send hugs to you. Every situation is different and what works in one household may not work in another, See what senior services are available to help you sort out options and don't be shy about asking for help. Also remember that you cannot control everything no matter how hard you try.

Rita, Thank you for sharing your food list, We could all benefit from using it as a basis for healthy eating. I usually eat well but sometimes the siren song of Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Therapy ice cream is more than I can resist. Jake should avoid potatoes because of the potassium but he is easily lured by french fries or mashed potatoes. We all know what to do, it's actually doing it that is hard.

Lanette, your diabetes class definitely uses James Clear tactics. I started with baby steps when I found MFP and it worked for me. When I started on Isagenix in 2009, their videos showed people cleaning out their fridges and cupboards and throwing away all the foods that didn't fit the plan. I couldn't do that because of the thrifty way I was raised but after eating all the offending foods a bit at a time, I didn't buy them again.

Our intentional food shopping was quite obvious when we got the card about the letter carriers food drive today. We have absolutely no food in our house that wasn't purchased intentionally with a meal or snack in mind and there is no food close to the expiration date due to being on the shelf for a long time.

Barbie in NW WA

1948CWB · May 18

grandmallie · May 18

Afternoon ladies
Annie- all I can say is I've been in your shoes sort of..only thing is my mother in law was smart and had the house put in my brother in laws name 7 yrs before my father in law needed to be in a home ,so that didn't get touched.
Like I said..if you can speak with a social worker,or his Dr about elder care services..
It was phenomenal for my FIL..they go by his income..so it was his SS and pension and he went to adult daycare m-f transportation included,hot meal and activities..it was wonderful..he also got meals on wheels,which he promptly locked them out of the house lol,also companion and homakers 4 hrs both Saterday and Sunday,it took the butsen off my brother and sister in law..who didn't care for him anyway..thats a story for another time..
But that would solve a whole bunch of your problems right there..and for my FIL it was 108.00 a month.
Ours was Connecticut Community Care for the Elderly.but im sure Delaware has something along the same lines..
Its a rainy yucky day here..oh well.

auntiebk · May 18

gratitudes:
Saturday: Joe telling me about Shadow responding to his call, after checking the yard and drive. He’s really becoming more patient with her, understanding her behaviors, even appreciating her devotion to guard duty.
Friday: voted and grateful for the privilege.
Thursday: Did balance games, knee pt yay. Got some steps in, but not enough for the “move more than yesterday” goal. [sigh] Way way way too many sweets before bed, foo.
Barbie you and Jake did better than Joe and I with our nephews. Did you and Jake include his sons when crafting of those rules? We failed to provide nephews with united guidance, only one of our many failures.
Tracey yours to Debbie about her DH and MIL’s opinions of her. Truth.
Lisa ‘but being polite to your neighbors IS still a thing.’ A challenge when they’re burning stinky trash, or (as in our case) firing off “practice rounds” in the middle of the night… Big part of his charm. What a blessing it didn’t make him conceited, arrogant, a jerk, like sooo many of handsome guys. Hooray for the good BIL news!
Heather hooray for comfort! And writing more and more words. And Finley’s safe arrival. Hip hip hooray!
Lanette, when I left Joe, I took the dogs with me. I think initially he was more upset that I took Scooter, than that I left . . .
Margaret, very very very well done. Agree, you can pay the grocer or pay the doctor, your choice. You inspire me to try making my own yoghurt, need some high protein breakfast, don’t like eggs. Just hope it doesn’t plug me up like cottage cheese used to.
Allie well begun is half done! One foot in front of the other.
Rita can you call the Dr and ask why the Jardiance? National cherry cobbler day, yum! Well done on the food research/spreadsheet.
Tracey, before he retired, our appliance repair guy said the same thing about Samsung and LG appliances. Recommended GE or KitchenAid for stoves and Whirlpool for refrigerators.

the nativity! What you said about bottling things up, not wanting Joe to be upset with me was my share of our troubles. When we reached the breaking point our counselor gave us a vocabulary, series of code words, to open communication lines in a non threatening productive way. Honestly it was easier for me than quitting smoking, didn’t have to be hospitalized or on oxygen :laugh:
Annie ((hugs)) Thankful for the kind stranger and the welfare check follow up and that you hid the key. If he asks, can tell him it’s in the shop? Hope the Dr. helps your Dad understand he can no longer drive or walk by himself. Maybe he’ll have recommendations about memory care. Hard times. ((hugs held extra long))
Carol how frustrating and scary! How long does he have to wait to see the gastro? Could they give him the camera tablet immediately?
Debbie it took a straw breaking the camel’s back incident for me and even then I didn’t communicate well, just said “I will NOT!” and left. As awful as it was, it got us to counseling and the last nine years have been so much better than the previous ten.
Michele “Vince found 4 of the kittens” Sorry I must have missed that. Did a queen deliver somewhere on your property? He has a loving heart! How does Shadow do with kittens? Better to be sensitive to chlorine than to sauerkraut. . . imho :laugh:
Barbie it’s so hard for me to understand not needing treatment yet. It was so pounded into my head that early detection and treatment were the keys to success. Now I wonder if the bean counters are hedging their bets, withholding treatment hoping we’ll “age out”? With me it’s the siren song of B&J’s NY Super Fudge Chunk. . . :devil:
Welcome @SherryRueter Sherry in TN. Hop right in wherever. This is a wise, wonderful, supportive group.
Machka thanks for sharing your Grandfather’s and Rowan’s experiences. “The thing is it’s not his fault. He needs protection.” Truth. Will be very hard to do, but truth.
Terri I’d go mad to be without my phone for that many days. Hope you get help to get it fixed soon.
Beth “hurts,” “sucks” and “heart breaking.” “Sleeps all the time?” Is hospice a consideration? ((gentle hugs held extra extra long))
Rebecca glad you were able to simmer chicken. How soon after the floors are done will you get the rest of your kitchen back?
Kim thank you for sharing your info. Knowledge helps to ease the anxiety, even when it’s a shocker. How do you determine which facilities are good?
Flea “scanxiety” great word. Prayers you get a miraculous “all clear.”
Time for balance games and pt before breakfast, then take Shadow early to dog group to work off her tendency to pull. “Leash arm” may have been one of the precursors to the tear in my shoulder.

Later, lighter, lovelies!
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD

Move more than yesterday, fuel better than yesterday, live NOW.
Open heart and mind before mouth.
2024: Strengthen: body, mind, heart-connections.

exermom · May 18

Just work. Pretty soon I’ll take a walk. Lector at the church tonight. Went to WalMart because Jess is coming tonight and I’ll make a casserole and needed some ingredients.

Sherry – if you’re looking for an actively posting group, hold onto your hat. Seriously, this thread moves f-a-s-t. What kind of exercise do you like to do?
‘
Tracey – oops! Well, Aspen is beautiful

barbie – yea for you and Jake

Lanette – the prices of going to a restaurant are outrageous. That’s part of the reason we eat so much at home. Jess is coming tonight and suggested we go out. Vince said “why don’t we eat at home” so I made a Mexican casserole. He won’t eat it so any leftovers she’ll be taking home. So sorry your dinner was such a disappointment. I know a while ago Vince went to 5 Guys, A hamburger, fries and Coke – $20

Beth and Annie – my heart goes out to you gals

And Margaret – your friend

Rebecca – I sprayed the bejesus out of those muffin cups and the brownies STILL stuck. Well, the cake is OK, I’ll just need to ice it tomorrow

Flea – wooshing good thoughts today, tomorrow, Mon and especially Tues for a good outcome

There’s a problem with the a/c and the guy is supposed to be here shortly. Hopefully, he can fix whatever is the problem today since we leave Tuesday to go to Denise’s. Vince said that while I was at WalMart PJ called to ask “where are you grandpa and grandma”. He thought we should have been there today!

Michele NC

barbiecat · May 18

Jake had major treatment for his cancer when it was first detected. They monitor him with blood tests every 3-6 months. The agreed protocol is to wait until certain numbers reach a certain level before treating again. The numbers are going up slowly and treatment will come eventually but there will be frequent monitoring until then

🤩🥰🌻Barbie in NW WA

mcmillonmail · May 18

@Machka9, I am so proud of you for conquering the Tour de fronds. I would love to do something like that. Way to go! @grandmallie, those boys looking at the chicken pictures are priceless.
@cityjanelondon I love Bea's dive through the donut hole. It's pretty impressive. Be patient with her; she is demonstrating leadership skills as the oldest. Gentle guidance as she learns how to lead is essential. My daughter was bossy and constantly yelled at her little brother, but she was also protective.
@LisaInArkansas, enjoy your weekend with your family.
@exermom I say brava for bringing your meals. We have a burger place called 5guys, and I bring sandwich thins as my bread and put the patty in; I eat five fries to get it out of my system( I love fries and lots of ketchup). I pack snacks for our road trips to stay on the program.
@Anniesquats100 It is hard work managing your aging parents; I had to check on my mom yesterday at the nursing home. I need to plan what to do if she passes, and if I pass first, who will care for her? Just typing about it, I just remembered that I need a handicap sign on my car to take my mom to the doctor. I try to have her sit while I park so she doesn't have to walk too far with her walker. I am in the sandwich era, where I manage my away college son and daughter, trying to learn how to be a good citizen and
care for our mothers. Our(me and my husband) fathers both died six mos apart. So, Annie, I know it is more than a notion to care for your dad.
@auntiebk, thank you for the warm welcome. Ladies have a wonderful weekend.

LisaInArkansas · May 18

Barbie - I'm so glad Jake's numbers mean he doesn't have to go in soon for more treatment.

Tracey - I'm so sorry your dinner with Rodger wasn't what you hoped it would be. When you have a taste in your mouth for something, and make a special trip for it, and it just isn't right, it seems doubly disappointing.

However, from your lips to my husband's ears, apparently. When I got up from my nap, Cor and Pat had taken down all 20 yards of the old hog wire fence, recovered all the metal T-posts and got the rusted, brush-filled fencing in the roll-off dumpster. And they took the big zero turn mower to it and cut down the remaining light brush. Looks like it was never there. That was the last really big job near the house that needed doing before they pick up at the end of the month!

I went out and expressed lots of thanks, and meant every word - I was not looking forward to yanking those fence posts out. Even with leverage and the right tools, it's a job. Less of a job, apparently, if you're six feet tall! They're both just sweated down though, it's near 90 degrees in our backyard, comfortable only in the shade now. The only thing better than having a man around who is willing to work hard, apparently is having two. They sound so much alike, I have to turn to see which one is smiling at me when they talk. Cor's really enjoying having his brother here, I know, and there is no drama in sight, which makes me happy.

So many good thoughts going out to all of you on the caregivers' paths, in whatever stage. It is such a hard journey. My heart goes out to you.

Later, my dears,
Lisa in AR

dlfk202000 · May 18

Anniesquats100 wrote: »

Good morning ladies.

Thank you Lisa, Michele, Heather, Machka, Tracey and Terri for your kind words about my dad.

When I heard the door, he left and drove back to his physical therapy thinking he had another appointment because he read the wrong day on the calendar. But he had just finished there two hours ago.

Machka, there are bells on the doors just hanging on the doorknobs so I do hear him. And we have a doctor appointment Monday. I'm hoping they can help convince him to stop driving.

I went over to talk to my aunt and she thinks we should put him in a home for memory care. I'm naturally reluctant both because he couldn't go on his long walks and because of the risk of having to sell the house to pay for it. But the wandering problem will only get worse in the fall when he wants to go out in the dark. It's a safe town, and his balance is better from all the PT. But I wonder how often he gets lost and doesn't tell me.

Such a worry. When his PT is over, he will go back to wanting to go out for ice cream every day. He takes his picture of Mom and shows it to strangers. He needs more social activity than I do. So sad, because he used to be a physicist and was usually the smartest person in every room, but so humble. Now he gets so confused.

So I hid my Mom's old car key. And the doctor will help make the decision about driving. And the issue of memory care is something to look into for the fall. Everything changes!

Annie in Delaware

Annie- is there senior "daycare" available in your area. That would give your dad social interaction plus a safe place where they can really watch him. It would be quite a bit cheaper than moving him to assisted living. He would still be at home at night. This would also give you a little time to do your things
We have a Senior Center here and they offer lots of activities

Debbie

LisaInArkansas · May 18

And... the rest of the story - while the guys were out grocery shopping (grilled sweet potatoes for dinner, yum!) they also found a place for Pat's camper/trailer, and he paid for a month up front, and it's five minutes from work, which he will also start Monday at a reasonable wage, and they'll go together and get his little "house" tomorrow, and he won't be staying with us! I love my life... I really do.

ginnytez · May 18

Good evening all:

Missed too much to comment on all.

Beth-congratulations on hearing-what miracles they can do now. Sorry for your mother's episode.

Annie-you and your sister need to figure what is best for your father. Providing him the best care uni can may mean it costs the house-you need to check the rules. You may be permitted continued to live there even if he goes to a home until he passes. If you want to keep him at home you need to be ready for the impact to your life.

My brother (who had the major back surgery and has the start of dementia) is experiencing an episode of delirium. He is having conversations with God (and he has never been religious). He is telling us God has told him people are dead and other things. I took them dinner Tuesday night and stayed for 2.5 hours-he had no memory of my visit. They have a brain MRI scheduled for next Friday. He has no apparent infection or anything else to explain the sharp change. Hopefully this will be reversible.

I have spent day resting and getting some housework done. Discovered I am out of scouring powder. Going to walk to Dollar General and pick some up. Haven't gotten any really exercise today or many steps, so that will help.

Take care all,

Ginny in Ohio

TerriRichardson112 · May 18

Beth: It’s so heartbreaking when our olds get to that stage. My heart goes out to you, and any others who are looking after failing elders.

Annie: Is it possible to get your dad into daycare of some kind?

🤗🤗🤗 and 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 for those who need them.

🙋‍♀️ Miele failte to the newbies.

☘️ Terri

margaretturk · May 18

Talked to my friend's daughter. She is at the sleeping most of the time stage and not saying much. I told her to keep talking to her. I believe it helps my friend and her daughter. Her other daughter who lives in Seattle flew back so she is surrounded by her children. She is in a hospice setting in the nursing home section of the complex where she lives.

My mother in law died in a similar setting as did another friend of mine about 15 years ago. I did go to see them. It is not the way I want to remember them. I am choosing to remember my friend the last time I took her for lunch on her birthday and when she came to church for mother's day. I also have a cold right now brought on by bad air pollution from wild fires in Canada and not sleeping the best for a number of nights because I overdid my gardening. I don't want to risk giving this to her or her loved ones. They have enough to deal with right now!

Annie here we have a program run by the Wilder foundation that a loved one with dementia would go to during the day. It does give the caregiver a break. My MIL went to such a program. It wasn't her favorite but she was very unhappy living here in St. Paul that was the real issue not the Wilder program. This was twenty years ago. I would hope there is something like it close to you. It did give DH some peace of mind.

WOMEN AGES 50+FOR MAY 2024

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