Black Team - Part 19ish

You're really the cutest thing I've ever seen-- I just you Madame Beans--

Heading to work-- I'll be back later--

REFLECT? I have a bad memory!!!! Hahahahah.

Thank you missy!!!!

Good one, Sara ... (you look ADORABLE in you AV, by the way!!!)

I'm still around, still struggling. I know what my problem is. I'm bored with just about everything I'm doing right now, and most especially having to focus on my weight, food choices, etc. And I'm stressed because everything is changing ... how's that for being mixed up!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: It'll pass ... I'm just having to back off for a while & refocus. This is the stage when I have dropped off & totally relapsed in the past, so I KNOW I have to keep hanging on & taking one day at a time, letting yesterday's screw-ups go.

I have come a long way ... I have never regained all of the weight I originally lost (although I've come close) and I'm currently about 40 pounds down from my all-time high (pictured below ... about 12 years ago.) I am MUCH healthier emotionally than I was in my 20s, 30s & early 40s ... I seldom feel depressed, and if I do, I have learned how to pull myself out of it for the most part.

I understand that I have a chronic condition called obesity. I know that I am going to have to fight it for the rest of my life. Most of the time I can accept that, although sometimes it royally p!sses me off and I rebel. I also know that probably 95% of people have to watch their diet & have to exercise to keep from being overweight. When I remember that, I don't feel so bad. As long as I keep finding new ways to keep going ... or even just struggle & limp along ... I am going to be better off in the long run.

I'd love to be a more active participant in the boards ... I just can't do it right now... but y'all are always in my thoughts & I love it when I have a minute to sit down & read what y'all are up to! This crazy time will pass & I'll be back!!

::: crosses fingers that these pictures will come out right!!:::






Tresa

Reflection.

When I started I looked like this:



And as of today I look like this:

You look great Nicky!!

Sara - So why do I need a 20-pound weight? Or were you just trying to throw me off the trail? :huh:

Tresa and Nicky - You girls look fabulous! :flowerforyou:


A year ago I was 4 months pregnant with Harley. In the past year, I gave birth, lost 30 pounds of pregnancy weight plus 10-15 more.

Here's my before picture from last August...



Okay I guess that's cheating. :laugh:

I don't have a real full-length before picture but I have some early-during and later-during. I've never been brave enough to post these on the public before and after thread but I my black teamers so I'll post here. The first ones are from December when I was about 5 pounds down from pre-preg weight. The second ones are from March (before I started yo-yoing). They're only about 10 pounds difference but there's a little difference.

Oh...take your 20lb weight. Pick her up. Give her kisses. Put her down. There. That's it. :laugh:

:huh: Then I do that workout dozens of times a day! :laugh:

Lori-- there's a great difference-- you're looking awesome! Nicky-- you, too-- keep it going, sweetie-- you're looking super. Tresa-- you look like a totally different person. I would never have known that was you-- wow. You look fabulous-- and I love the pictures with your hubs.

Heck-- you all know how I feel-- Lord knows I ramble on ad nauseum, so I'll spare you further reflections. Suffice it to say that during this year I learned how to conquer and own my lifelong enemy. Through the "love and compassion" of my online "strangers"-- this wonderful community, I learned to cut myself some slack, not be so hard on myself, be proud of the things I should be, and get in touch with my "warm and fuzzy side."

I've learned to love exercise and healthy eating. I've mastered NOT turning to food in stress. I've learned to temper the psychological throes of weighing less and looking better. If you're not grounded, looking good for the first time in a lonnnng time can really mess with your head, and your ego, and you can become a real, first-class jerk to the people in your life who loved you even when you didn't look so good. Beware.

Ive learned to temper my time here, and not take away from the people who need me-- so, all in all, a good year.

Love to all-- Sara-- sweet challenge this week. You rock, young woman.

it is goofy, no?, how we see ourselves-- Nicky, you're adorable. But, you have to see that-- kooky, isn't it?

I had the opposite problem-- when I was at my heaviest, didn't matter how much hubs told me positive things and showed me love, I couldn't see myself as anything other than gross and not worthy of ANYTHING.

I lose a couple of pounds and begin to feel and behave like my you-know-what doesn't stink if I'm not careful. That's how it was back in '92, last time I lost significant weight for a wedding I was in, and looked "hot, hot, hot." Behaved like a beast, caused mundo trouble--

Maturity and growing, presumably, in God's grace has kept it in check this time. I'm just so tickled to be able to share this with my family who loved me even when they couldn't fit their arms around my SpongeMarla Fatback to hug me.:bigsmile:

Nicky-- :drinker: here's to healthy self-perception.