For the perpetually single

Options
123457

Replies

  • CherryIceGlitter
    CherryIceGlitter Posts: 145
    Options
    SINGLE PRINGLE AND READY TO MINGLE

    Erm....... Pringle?

    Help out an senile old buffer here. What's a Pringle? :huh:

    It just rhymes with single and mingle.. thats all!
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
    Options
    Wow...

    I'm 26 and have been single my whole life, save for a period of maybe about 5 months at ages 19 and 22, respectively, but I don't consider those "relationships," nor were they even boyfriends.
    I always end up getting dumped/abandoned, anyway.
    Just happened this last week after dating someone I was really really tickled over, for about a week.
    Every guy will eventually just stop texting, calling, and will always have a convenient excuse as to "why" he found me so repulsive that he had to sever all contact with me without giving any reason.
    The part that angers me the most is that they can't give me the truth. So I can't work on bettering myself, improving myself.
    Because of this, my insecurity causes me to conclude it's because I'm still too "fat," or more probable, too tall/'big."

    I'm at the point where my biological clock is ticking and I realise this is something that if I don't overcome it will break me. I absolutely need to fall in love and eventually have a child.
    I told myself a while back if things don't start happening for me by 30, I don't plan on remaining on this earth any longer. I've worked too hard and given up too much.
    I've always felt like I wasn't really of this earth, anyway.

    First off,I looked at your pictures and see a very attractive young lady,nothing at all wrong with how you look and that is the truth.
    I would never say that if I didn`t mean it.

    An honest question and one that will take some self reflection.
    When you are with a guy on a date or a few dates how do you act around him,am curious based on your last paragraph if when thinking about it you maybe move a bit too fast into the serious relationship mindset rather then just getting to know each other and have some fun.
    I am certainly not blaming you but you are part of the equation so as all of us must at times we need to examine how we come across to people.

    Lastly,you are 26 years old,your biological clock has just barely got wound up there is no need to rush it nor think that it is now or never.
    Trust me,you have a lifetime ahead of you,please take a deep breath and understand that.:flowerforyou:
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    Options
    I I was on eharmony for 2 years. I spent $600 on that site and went on dates with a lot of girls, but they never called me back after I bought them dinner.


    Could that be the reason why? I know I am old fashioned and I would NEVER call a guy!!! I know things seem to of changed over the years but it is something that just doesn't sit well with me.

    What do others think about this stance also?

    I have to agree with you. I would never call a guy either. So maybe if you go out with a girl and like her, call her and see if she wants to go out again? If she says yes, then great, but if no, then at least you tried. But some girls are still old-fashioned about that kind of thing.

    Also to the poster above who is talking about her biological clock - there is no reason that you can't have a child on your own. I want a child, but I also know that I may never find someone to be with, which is why I would adopt or get a sperm donor.
  • chocciechip
    chocciechip Posts: 207 Member
    Options
    I like this thread :)

    I have been single for 4.5 years, in that time had about 4 dates in total and had a stalker lol. A year before that the person who I considered the love of my life died in an accident, and frankly I haven't found anyone who I have felt similar feelings towards since.

    Sometimes it would be nice to have someone - especially right now as the heating is broken in my flat and it would be good to have a human sized hot water bottle heh. But not being with someone has meant that I can follow my own dreams. In the last month I got accepted on to an internship in Mexico doing my dream job (marine conservation and diving) and if I had been with someone then I wouldn't have had the chance to do that or atleast it would have been much harder.

    I love my independent life having been out with some doozies I'm happy to wait if someone does turn up great - otherwise BRING ON THE SUNSHINE!

    The only time it gets awkward is when most of my friends are in relationships or at weddings when all the hens are married/with families and there are so what about you is there anyone special in your life? Fortunately I am maid of honour at two weddings this year so I shall allow any young man who wishes to buy me a drink/have a dance to do so :-D
  • nicolebunny55
    nicolebunny55 Posts: 110
    Options
    I agree I like this thread too.

    I dont believe that means your defective at all! It can mean many things. Like for one your just not interested in dating at the moment. You might have alot going on in your life and maybe you want to keep your focus on that, for example school or your children. Another reason you could be single is you dont just accept the first person that throws themselves at you. Some many people especially women tend to not want to be alone so the first guy that says I like you they are willing to over look any bad qualities just to say they have someone. I refuse to do that!

    I am 26 years old and have been single for the past 2 years. I have yet to find anyone in my area that is even close to the type of person I would want in my life, plus I am in school trying to finish my teaching degree. And yes some people might say I am picky or that I have too many rules, but I would rather be picky and have rules than to accept anything just so I am not alone.
  • Pete1471
    Pete1471 Posts: 126 Member
    Options
    SINGLE PRINGLE AND READY TO MINGLE

    Erm....... Pringle?

    Help out an senile old buffer here. What's a Pringle? :huh:

    It just rhymes with single and mingle.. thats all!

    Ahhh thats good, I can't keep up with all the words young people use. I had to be told what "hashtag" was all about.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    Options
    What is it with guys sending unsolicited and unwelcome pics of their junk?
    Not the first time I have heard of that...good Lord.

    Usually accompanied by the romantic phrase of "See what you cause.."
    Awesomeness.

    I was on a first (and only) date with this guy, and we were sitting in his car talking. He asked me if I trusted him, then he took my hand and put it on his junk and said "this is how I feel about you." GRRRROOOOSSSS! Seriously, dude, like that's a turn-on for any girl??? I spent the rest of the time with my back pressed up against the car door. He said I was giving him that "don't touch me vibe". Really?! Can't imagine it!

    When I met my husband, there were no cell phones, so the whole sexting thing was a complete shock to me. I'm a mother for crying out loud! (not a prude, just not an exhibitionist!)
  • BV1980
    BV1980 Posts: 272 Member
    Options
    I I was on eharmony for 2 years. I spent $600 on that site and went on dates with a lot of girls, but they never called me back after I bought them dinner.


    Could that be the reason why? I know I am old fashioned and I would NEVER call a guy!!! I know things seem to of changed over the years but it is something that just doesn't sit well with me.

    What do others think about this stance also?

    I have to agree with you. I would never call a guy either. So maybe if you go out with a girl and like her, call her and see if she wants to go out again? If she says yes, then great, but if no, then at least you tried. But some girls are still old-fashioned about that kind of thing.

    I didn't mean that I waited around for the girl to call. She wouldn't return my calls after the first meetup. I have a rule that I reach out twice and then that is it. So after the first tie meeting I would giver her a call. I would leave a message. If I didn't get an answer or hear back, then I would try one more time and then after that just move on. After 2 years of that and getting nowhere, I moved on from eharmony, with $600 less in my wallet.
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,365 Member
    Options
    I'm single because everyone else is defective.

    You win my thread <3

    Yay!! :bigsmile:
  • grobbygru
    grobbygru Posts: 295 Member
    Options
    I I was on eharmony for 2 years. I spent $600 on that site and went on dates with a lot of girls, but they never called me back after I bought them dinner.


    Could that be the reason why? I know I am old fashioned and I would NEVER call a guy!!! I know things seem to of changed over the years but it is something that just doesn't sit well with me.

    What do others think about this stance also?

    I have to agree with you. I would never call a guy either. So maybe if you go out with a girl and like her, call her and see if she wants to go out again? If she says yes, then great, but if no, then at least you tried. But some girls are still old-fashioned about that kind of thing.

    I didn't mean that I waited around for the girl to call. She wouldn't return my calls after the first meetup. I have a rule that I reach out twice and then that is it. So after the first tie meeting I would giver her a call. I would leave a message. If I didn't get an answer or hear back, then I would try one more time and then after that just move on. After 2 years of that and getting nowhere, I moved on from eharmony, with $600 less in my wallet.

    Well that's fair enough then - sounds like a good rule - no need to chase things that mean nothing. I'm sure you will find someone - I don't think those internet things are any good tho - I have been on them - would never pay for them (another one of my old fashioned things lol) - but met nothing but horrible creatures on there - the last being someone that was even swearing at me via email - what a lunatic - so I swore then never to bother with any of those things again. :yawn:
  • msespresso
    msespresso Posts: 153 Member
    Options
    Perpetually single.... yep, that's me! I'm 36 and have had one actual relationship (in college) and have been on one date since then, and a blind date at that! I would never classify myself as defective, though. I am not scarred, have no abuse in my past, I had a happy childhood and have wonderful parents, including a great dad, who I must say, sets the standard pretty high when I consider if a man is husband material!

    Dating has just never really been something I, or my close friends have done. Many of my friends married young and dated very few before meeting their spouse... I worked for the past 9 years as a teaching assistant (elementary school), where the majority of my co-workers were women. I own my own business and 99.9% of my customers are women. I live in a small city, don't do the bar scene and I just don't meet a lot of men! I wish I could say I was a flirt... I'm friendly, but shy and I'm terrible at small talk, so I probably come off as stuck up, especially in large groups where I don't say a whole lot.

    Yep, I'm perpetually single... yep, I'd love that to change, but I'm also fairly content right now. I'd rather be single than be in a bad, or even mediocre, relationship.
  • KlassyKassi
    KlassyKassi Posts: 58 Member
    Options
    I'd rather be single than be in a bad, or even mediocre, relationship.

    ^^^^ This EXACTLY.
  • jalynsmom
    jalynsmom Posts: 33
    Options
    I often times see that the people that thinks there is something "wrong" with a person that is single for long periods of time is the same person that jumps from one person/relationship to the next because they can't stand to be alone. Me, I'm the opposite. I've been divorced for over 3 years and I haven't dated since my ex-husband and I split up and it doesn't really bother me. For one, I have a 5 year old daughter that I devote the majority of my time to and I figure that it won't be long and she won't have time for 'ole mom so I'm going to enjoy every minute that I can with her while she still thinks I'm cool! But besides that, I'm pretty independent and I enjoy being able to do whatever I want, whenever I want. I'm not totally opposed to dating, but I'm just not looking at this point...I have plenty of other things that keep me occupied and it's just not a top priority to me right now.
  • raspberryblonde
    raspberryblonde Posts: 40
    Options
    What is it with guys sending unsolicited and unwelcome pics of their junk?
    Not the first time I have heard of that...good Lord.

    Wait until business contacts text pictures of their junk to your business cell phone! Happened to a coworker, sent by someone we see on a weekly basis!
  • Mhaney
    Mhaney Posts: 467 Member
    Options
    I have refused to date since my divorce, and I don't see myself as defective as all. I am just one of those people that is better alone. Being in a relationship stresses me out. I am in better physical, mental and emotional health when I am single. I don't like to be touched. I guard my privacy more than most people would think is healthy, but it is how I am and I enjoy it. I don't ever get lonely, I don't understand the sentiment behind that emotion.
  • Altruista75
    Altruista75 Posts: 409 Member
    Options
    I think it's my own choosing to be anymore. It's just easier to be single personally. No one to answer to and as long as you get what you "need" when you can - it's a win win!
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    Options
    I see dating as a precurser to marriage. I am not the sort of person who would be content to date for four years or longer. That's just not who I am or how I am.I am looking for someone to spend my life with and start a family with.

    That said. I've dated my fair share of men but the bottom line is: Do I want to spend my life with this person? And the answer has always been no. I've never been in a relationship that lasted more then eight months. Because I refuse to string someone along if I know a relationship has no future.

    To top it off I have the ****tiest luck. The fellows I can see myself being with forever, don't like me. And the fellows I can't stand, fall in love with me. It's the worst. I hate breaking hearts and I hate having my heart broken. But it's a necessary evil.

    At this point I both want to date and don't want to. After awhile you get tired of having your hopes pricked just to have them dashed... over and over and over. BUT I also know that if I don't risk being hurt again, I won't ever find someone to share this life with. So there you have it.

    On a side note, had my heart broken two times last year. ): It was a really bad year.

    PS: I don't believe those who are perpetually single are 'defective'. I think some people are content to stay with people they don't like JUST so they aren't alone. I see those people as defective.
  • Rhonnie
    Rhonnie Posts: 506 Member
    Options
    I think people who can't be alone are the defective ones. :)
  • coe28
    coe28 Posts: 715 Member
    Options
    I, too, am one of those perpetually single people. I divorced in 2009 at the young age of 25 and have only been in 2 relationships since, one lasted a year and one only a few months. What I've learned now is that I am extremely selective and am absolutely not willing to settle for just anyone. I have a son from my marriage who is now 3 years old and I will not allow just anyone to be a part of his life. On top of all that, I live in a very rural area and the selection is seriously depleted. So, by the looks of it, I will probably be single forever!

    It's not that I loathe being single or need someone to take care of me. I take care of my son, make decent money and am buying a house this spring. I do, however, miss the companionship and the passion of having that special someone.
  • EatClean_WashUrNuts
    EatClean_WashUrNuts Posts: 1,590 Member
    Options
    If you're "perpetually" single, it's because you choose to be so.

Categories