Harsh words & bashing instead of support & motivation?
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This is why I derive most of my support and *kitten*-kicking from my friends list, and not the forums. As you find folks in the forums with similar goals or personalities, assemble your team, and you can go to them for knowledge and support.Not every person is born with a supportive and motivational personality.
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You cannot force everyone to be the same kind of person that you happen to prefer. You take your motivation and support from those that work best with your own personality. Leave the rest.
Glad to have you on my team! :flowerforyou:0 -
Aren't we all here for the same reason?
No.
I'm here trolling for sexual partners.
Me too! But I still...haven't found...what I'm looking for. No, I still...haven't found...what I'm looking for.
Oh, u 2 soooooo funny.....0 -
Obligatory...assemble your team, and you can go to them for knowledge and support.
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You're so sweet. I hope people don't bash on you. But yes, it is agreed. We are here for fitness. Just some people like to say "my bro science is better than your bro science." Also, one particular guy uses roids and LOVES trolling. I enjoy it when he's an OP.
Broscience totally came into play during a discussion my friend IRL posted about cutting out refined sugar and replacing with honey, Brown bread for white, etc. She's psyched to be learning about better food choices and how food can efffect your health. A couple of bros joined a very positive conversation about learning better food choices and bashed on my poor friend about how she's stupid, and a calorie is a calorie, and cutting out all sugars will kill her. Like that's what she said!!! She called me practically in tears, saying she's too sensitive for the forums and shouldn't post anything again. I replied to him telling him to troll other more asinine topics if he wants to be contrary. His reply to me? But there's only 1 tablespoon of sugar in white bread... Get a life buddy!
I'm so sorry that happened. I don't think I'm allowed to but could name all 3 of them right now. Grrrrr.0 -
Glad to have you kicking my *kitten*, buddy. :happy:
This is why I derive most of my support and *kitten*-kicking from my friends list, and not the forums. As you find folks in the forums with similar goals or personalities, assemble your team, and you can go to them for knowledge and support.Not every person is born with a supportive and motivational personality.
...
You cannot force everyone to be the same kind of person that you happen to prefer. You take your motivation and support from those that work best with your own personality. Leave the rest.
Glad to have you on my team! :flowerforyou:0 -
Obligatory...assemble your team, and you can go to them for knowledge and support.
that's just hot0 -
There is only one way to get fit. The right way. If you can't get on board with doing it right then your just doing it wrong.
Oh wait, your being sincere. Then yes you can come over and play with my toys.
Why is it that everyone who makes these photo memes has such lousy grammar?
I'm not sure. To lazy?
Quit posibly. Tha etra leter iz har 2 tip.0 -
As with anything internet based, there are some people who are just here for the wrong reasons. You just have to ignore them as they crave attention; and hope they'll go and get some fresh air and exercise instead! If they're too annoying, then report them.0
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I think it's important to recognize when people are looking to help, too. If someone writes, "I'm just starting HCG..." that makes me concerned, and I want to help.0
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You are absolutely right. I don't understand why some people get off on trying to hurt others. Let's help one another.
I agree with this - I was shocked when I first joined MFP and saw how nasty some people were. It made me think twice about the whole program. We all have the same goal so why wouldn't we be supportive of each other?
But not all of us have the same goal. And honestly, I'm not one of those pat you on the head types every time you do something well/make a good decision. Do I give the occasional "way to go" or "congrats" on some of my friends' walls/posts? Sometimes, but not very often, because the ones that "need it", generally have a lot of head patters already and don't need my comment to join the other 50 comments saying "good job".
I wasn't saying anything about how you motivate your friends on your profile, I was talking about on the message boards. I don't expect anyone to congratulate me when I lose half a pound though I do really appreciate the people that take the time out of their day to offer it to me. And I may be mistaken, but I thought we did all have the same general goal - to be or get fit and get or stay healthy?0 -
I agree. I never understood why some people feel the need to search the forums for debates they can join in and then gang together with others and be rude to people. There's absolutely no reason for it - it doesn't make people feel good and it's very mean. No one joined this site wanting to feel belittled or humiliated because they might be ignorant to certain diet and/or nutrition information. If you're THAT unahppy of a person that you have to pick on others because of a simple question, observation or opinon, maybe you need to take a closer look in the mirror and judge yourself first.
Give your heads a shake. It IS a form of bullying and it is a true testament to your character. Snarky comments made to make other people feel stupid are immature and rude. There are no two ways about it.0 -
I'm here for the pie. And the hardass meanies who pretty much make up my friends list and brook no BS. And...the ladies who lunch. Also...boobies!0
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I agree completely. I understand that there are going to be those who don't agree with you, but some of the responses I've had are very condesending and just hurtful. There is a difference in stating your opinion and how you feel about the subject, but that doesn't give a person the ok to say hurtful things. I agree with the one poster that with this forum being on a computer, people don't have to deal with the consequences of their comments and can't physically see that they affect people. If we were sitting face to face, I bet a majority of the comments said wouldn't have been said in the first place.0
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I'm sure everyone will stop having opinions now that this has been posted.
Next time someone's looking to go on a 500 calorie diet we will all just say AWESOME WTG!!0 -
I agree. I never understood why some people feel the need to search the forums for debates they can join in and then gang together with others and be rude to people. There's absolutely no reason for it - it doesn't make people feel good and it's very mean. No one joined this site wanting to feel belittled or humiliated because they might be ignorant to certain diet and/or nutrition information. If you're THAT unahppy of a person that you have to pick on others because of a simple question, observation or opinon, maybe you need to take a closer look in the mirror and judge yourself first.
Give your heads a shake. It IS a form of bullying and it is a true testament to your character. Snarky comments that make other people feel stupid are immature and rude. There are no two ways about it.
Now you're just throwing the bullying term around because it's popular and in the news a lot.
How am I supposed to know that a comment i'll make will make you feel stupid, especially on the internet when you can't tell the tone, etc.? Or how about if it's something that has been covered 304,002,198 times already and you don't search? That's not bullying.0 -
I recently read several posts where fellow MFPers are saying harsh things to one another or pushing their views on others. Aren't we all here for the same reason? To get healthy and maintain a healthy lifestyle for the duration? The last thing I want to see is someone being put down for trying. There is NO excuse for bullies no matter what age, race, weight, etc. Everyone is entitled to their own views, opinions and beliefs and although you do NOT have to agree with them, please keep your negative and self-esteem crunching comments off and just agree to disagree and move on with your own successes. Now, let's get back to helping each other and MOTIVATING and SUPPORTING each other in our journeys! Thanks, and good luck to all!
Unfortunately, we live in a society that views disagreeing as "bashing." You, no doubt, will see this post as bashing, for instance, even though it simply disagrees with you. In fact, you say "you do NOT have to agree with them, please keep your negative and self-esteem crunching comments off." Many times these forums are swimming in misinformation, which I think everyone has a right to believe, but if you pass it along to others, you should be prepared to provide scientific evidence it's actually true. You are entitled to your own opinion, but you are not entitled to your own facts. Facts aren't matters of opinion.0 -
I'm sure everyone will stop having opinions now that this has been posted.
Next time someone's looking to go on a 500 calorie diet we will all just say AWESOME WTG!!
That's such an awesome inspirational idea. Thanks for being a rock in my corner for support.
500 cals here I come!0 -
Some people just deserve it tho.0
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I think it's important to recognize when people are looking to help, too. If someone writes, "I'm just starting HCG..." that makes me concerned, and I want to help.
If the "support and motivation" crowd had their way the only thing you could say to someone about to start a dangerous diet that will cause their hair to fall out and lead to eventual organ failure would be, "Good for you! I wish you all the best!"
:noway:0 -
I'm here for the pie. And the hardass meanies who pretty much make up my friends list and brook no BS. And...the ladies who lunch. Also...boobies!
i like pie....0 -
I'm here for the pie. And the hardass meanies who pretty much make up my friends list and brook no BS. And...the ladies who lunch. Also...boobies!
I came for the cookies. I own the boobies.0 -
Obligatory...assemble your team, and you can go to them for knowledge and support.
I'm so freaking excited! I'm going to one of the marathon events.0 -
I agree. I never understood why some people feel the need to search the forums for debates they can join in and then gang together with others and be rude to people. There's absolutely no reason for it - it doesn't make people feel good and it's very mean. No one joined this site wanting to feel belittled or humiliated because they might be ignorant to certain diet and/or nutrition information. If you're THAT unahppy of a person that you have to pick on others because of a simple question, observation or opinon, maybe you need to take a closer look in the mirror and judge yourself first.
Give your heads a shake. It IS a form of bullying and it is a true testament to your character. Snarky comments that make other people feel stupid are immature and rude. There are no two ways about it.
Now you're just throwing the bullying term around because it's popular and in the news a lot.
How am I supposed to know that a comment i'll make will make you feel stupid, especially on the internet when you can't tell the tone, etc.? Or how about if it's something that has been covered 304,002,198 times already and you don't search? That's not bullying.
It seems each response you've made in this thread has been sarcastic. By doing that, you're making other people feel stupid. I don't need you to tell me why I'm saying something. And how many people actually do a search before posting a thread? Maybe they want some new, fresh opinions. I don't know you at all, nothing about you but based on your participation in this thread you come across as being snarky and rude and that's exactly what I meant in my original post.0 -
Recently on Oprah's Life Class with Tony Robbins, he talked about how women affirm each other too much to the point that we allow each other to stay in our stories, bad habits, and stuck. Too often women don't want to rock the boat in their female relationships so we commiserate. Well, eating and exercise are BIG areas where this happens. I don't know what posts you are specifically referring to (unfortunately I don't get to read a lot of them! :-( ) But, I think we should keep in mind that rather than giving people a way out, we can be POSITIVE and motivating, AND keep them accountable. I sure wish I had more people in my life who kept me accountable rather than, "Oh, you look fine. Go ahead and eat that." ARRRGGHH!0
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Excellent! No marathons in my area, but going to do the midnight screening.I'm so freaking excited! I'm going to one of the marathon events.0 -
I think it's important to recognize when people are looking to help, too. If someone writes, "I'm just starting HCG..." that makes me concerned, and I want to help.
If the "support and motivation" crowd had their way the only thing you could say to someone about to start a dangerous diet that will cause their hair to fall out and lead to eventual organ failure would be, "Good for you! I wish you all the best!"
:noway:
This will be my answer to all questions regarding not eating exercise calories, eating 500 calories a day, drinking pregnant lady pee, should I leave my husband/bf, I'm getting a boob job and need your prayers and should I have a baby or not threads.0 -
Support and motivation are meaningless if it's a bad idea they're supporting. It's not helping anyone to tell them they're doing a great job if they're on the wrong track.
^^^^ This.0 -
I came for the cookies. I own the boobies.
You could share the boobies. That would be motivational. Depending on how they were suported.0 -
Just curious... Who went back and read that thread referenced as an example of being mean? The 'haven't lost since March' one? Oh, internet...Haha0
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I just wanted to say that you all are doing a great job! Congrats! Keep up the great work!0
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