"I HAVE NIPPLES GREG,CAN YOU MILK ME?"
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HEY MOM, CAN WE GET SOME MEATLOAF?!"I happen to know everything there is to know about maple syrup! I love maple syrup. I love maple syrup on pancakes. I love it on pizza. And I take maple syrup and put a little bit in my hair when I've had a rough week. What do you think holds it up, slick?"
- Jeremy Grey in Wedding Crashers
I NEVER KNOW WHAT'S SHE'S DOING IN THERE....MOM, THE MEATLOAF!!
"THE MEATLOAF!!!!" LMAO LUV THAT MOVIE!!!0 -
[Jane climbs a ladder]
Frank: Nice beaver!
Jane: [producing a stuffed beaver] Thank you. I just had it stuffed.0 -
"I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that *kitten*-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your *kitten* sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions?"
- Jeremy Grey in Wedding Crashers
MY ALL TIME FAV!!! THAT WAS AWESOME!!0 -
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"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!"
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OMG this is the best...line...EVER...:)0 -
"Y'all got on this boat for different reasons, but y'all come to the same place. So now I'm asking more of you than I have before. Maybe all. Sure as I know anything, I know this - they will try again. Maybe on another world, maybe on this very ground swept clean. A year from now, ten? They'll swing back to the belief that they can make people... better. And I do not hold to that. So no more runnin'. I aim to misbehave. "
" I am a loner, a crazy wide eyed loner on a doomed mission to Venus to battle with the 3 headed mega beast but on the way I caught cornflakes disease."0 -
"I know... you're right. I'm so sorry, I f**kin' hate this job. I don't want to be the one to pass judgement, decide who gets in. S**t makes me sick to my stomach, I get the runs from the stress. It's not cause you're not hot, I would love to tap that *kitten*. I would tear that *kitten* up. I can't let you in cause you're old as f**k. For this club, you know, not for the earth."
Omg the doorman scene! How could I have left it out!?
"You old, she pregnant. Can't have a bunch of old pregnant *****es running around. That's crazy, I'm only allowed to let in five percent black people. He said that, that means if there's 25 people here I get to let in one and a quarter black people. So I gotta hope there's a black midget in the crowd."
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
"You gonna set my country music award on fire?"
Rabbit to Favre from Super Troopers0 -
"Every time I come in the kitchen, you in the kitchen. In the godd@mn refrigerator. Eatin' up all the food. All the chicken. All the pig feet. All the collard greens. All the hog maw. I wanna eat some of them chitlins! I like pig feet!"
~ Friday0 -
"Oh man, this is nice, real nice. If we wanted bubbles in the tub when I was a kid we had to fart in it."
Trading Places.
That whole movie cracks me up.0 -
Clark: Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead? Eddie: Naw, I'm doing just fine, Clark.
-National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation0 -
"What would ya say...YA DO HERE?!?" (Office Space)
"Look at THIS f&*^in' guy..." (Major League)
"They have a thin candy shell" "Yeah? I think your brain has a THICK candy shell" (Tommy Boy)0 -
" I want to roll you up into a little ball and stuff you in my vagina, you can live in there its warm and cozy".0
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Sarah Marshall: I need you to get hard, Pete.
Peter Bretter: I know what I'm supposed to do.0 -
Peter Gibbons: The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.
Bob Porter: Don't... don't care?
Peter Gibbons: It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now if I work my *kitten* off and Initech ships a few extra units, I don't see another dime, so where's the motivation? And here's something else, Bob: I have eight different bosses right now.
Bob Slydell: I beg your pardon?
Peter Gibbons: Eight bosses.
Bob Slydell: Eight?
Peter Gibbons: Eight, Bob. So that means that when I make a mistake, I have eight different people coming by to tell me about it. That's my only real motivation is not to be hassled, that and the fear of losing my job. But you know, Bob, that will only make someone work just hard enough not to get fired.0 -
"Why don't you drink a tall glass of shut the *kitten* up?"
-Dawn of the Dead
Classy.0 -
Lloyd Dobbler: "She's gone. She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen."
-Say Anything0 -
Bluto: Hey! What's all this laying around stuff? Why are you all still laying around here for?
Stork: What the hell are we supposed to do, ya moron? We're all expelled. There's nothing to fight for anymore.
D-Day: [to Bluto] Let it go. War's over, man. Wormer dropped the big one.
Bluto: What? Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!
Otter: [to Boon] Germans?
Boon: Forget it, he's rolling.
Bluto: And it ain't over now. 'Cause when the goin' gets tough...
[thinks hard of something to say]
Bluto: The tough get goin'! Who's with me? Let's go!
~Animal House0 -
Brun.. that is my favorite quote too!0
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That boy is a P-I-G PIG!Bluto: Hey! What's all this laying around stuff? Why are you all still laying around here for?
Stork: What the hell are we supposed to do, ya moron? We're all expelled. There's nothing to fight for anymore.
D-Day: [to Bluto] Let it go. War's over, man. Wormer dropped the big one.
Bluto: What? Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!
Otter: [to Boon] Germans?
Boon: Forget it, he's rolling.
Bluto: And it ain't over now. 'Cause when the goin' gets tough...
[thinks hard of something to say]
Bluto: The tough get goin'! Who's with me? Let's go!
~Animal House0 -
oh also...
Steven: Hey, wait, come back!
Chip: Well look who decided to show.
Steven: You were supposed to be here 4 hours ago.
Chip: Was I? So I'm the tardy one?
Steven: Yeah, I was gonna go to that bed and bath place and now it's closed.
Chip: Well maybe I shouldn't have come at all, JERK OFF!.... I'm just jokin' with ya.
Love Jim Carey!0 -
"'Tis but a scratch"0
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Connor: Do you know who I am?
Brad: What?
Connor: Google me *****! I might be famous one day.0 -
"UMMM IM GONNA BE GOING AWAY FOR AWHILE.....TO JAIL...YEA" -OFFICE SPACE0
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I'm over here in my unit, isolated and alone, eating my terrible tasting food, and I have to look over at that. That looks like the most fun I've ever seen in my entire life, and it's B.S. - excuse my language. I'm just saying that I wash and dry; I'm like a single mother. Look, we all know home-ec is a joke - no offense - it's just that everyone takes this class to get an A, and it's bullsh!t - and I'm sorry. I'm not putting down your profession, but it's just the way I feel. I don't want to sit here, all by myself, cooking this sh!tty food - no offense - and I just think that I don't need to cook tiramisu. Am I going to be a chef? No. There's three weeks left of school, give me a fv@kin' break! I'm sorry for cursing.
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I could fill this entire thread with quotes from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.
Thanks for coming, please stay for the end credits, if you're wondering who the best boy is, it's somebody's nephew, um, don't forget to validate your parking, and to all you good people in the Midwest, sorry we said f___ so much.0 -
From: "Along Came Polly"
Sandy Lyle: Reuben, I'm in a situation here. We have to leave now.
Reuben Feffer: No. Can we stay a couple more minutes?
Sandy Lyle: Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted.
Reuben Feffer: I don't know what that means.
Sandy Lyle: I tried to fart and a little *kitten* came out. I just sharted. Now let's go.
Reuben Feffer: You're the most disgusting person I've ever met in my life.0 -
I say this like everyday...""PC Load Letter"? What the @!%$ does that mean?"
Great when you work in an office.0 -
You don't know what a Dutch Rudder - alright, you grab your d*ck, and then you have somebody else work your arm. Here, lemme show you. Grab my arm, I'm grabbing my d*ck, you're grabbing my arm... now work it. Work it. Work my arm. See that *kitten*? Now work it up and down. See that? It's like somebody else is jerking you off.0
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Not from a movie, but from the TV show scrubs. I crack up every time i see this clip
Carla: [J.D. tells Carla, Elliot, and Turk that Kim is pregnant] I'm sorry J.D. but you knew this could happen when you had sex.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: I have to tell you guys something but you have to promise not to laugh. Ok?
[Carla, Elliot, and Turk agree]
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: Ok, on the night of said conception, ah, Kim and I nude-ed up, and um, the dirty talk began and I got a little over excited.
Dr. Christopher Turk: Oooh, She like a the dirty talk!
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: No, I do. I find it gets the ladies going. But I occasionally get wrapped up in it myself, especially when I use some of my different voices.
Dr. Elliot Reid: He does.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: Anywho, there was some unexpected friendly-fire, and uh, even though I never got a chance to enter the, the village, ah, there was an air strike on one of the outlying regions.
Dr. Christopher Turk: [Turk yells excitedly and Carla pulls his ear to stop him] Thank you.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: Anyway, I talked to the gals in O.B.G and they said it's not uncommon for a woman to get pregnant even if there was no actual penetration.
Dr. Christopher Turk: What your trying to tell us is that you never actually had sex with her?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: [after a brief pause] I didn't have a condom.
[Muffled giggles from Turk, Carla, and Elliot]
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian: And ah, we decided not to have sex because, here's the kicker, I didn't want to get her pregnant.
[Carla, Elliot, and Turk break out in hysterical laughing]
every quote from scrubs makes me cry with laughter.0 -
"Our bird's heads are falling off!" Dumb and Dumber0
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