When You Cry... They Win. Stop.

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Replies

  • keenercam
    keenercam Posts: 321 Member
    I posted a blog yesterday about the damage I've allowed others to do to me with their words over the past 35+ years and how I am finally coming to the realization that I'd given them too much power. There comes a time when you have to stop giving others the power to ruin your moment, your day, or your future.
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member

    IT'S ON LIKE ZAXXON! (For you tween larvae born after Regan, Zaxxon is a video game.)
    [/quote

    :frown: you lost me at "video game"

    It doesn't matter. I'm not really sure what the phrase actually means.

    phew don't have to add this to "things I don't get"

    Would it make you feel better to know, I didn't get it either? LOL

    Yes I like to feel like I'm not alone :wink:

    Good, me too! BTW...I love your profile picture!
    [/quote]

    Gee thanks :flowerforyou:
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  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    When you're the "victim," you make them the "victor."

    My favorite part!

    Thanks. I'll forgive you for holding a Beretta in that picture. Real marksmen use Glock. ;)
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    I posted a blog yesterday about the damage I've allowed others to do to me with their words over the past 35+ years and how I am finally coming to the realization that I'd given them too much power. There comes a time when you have to stop giving others the power to ruin your moment, your day, or your future.

    Well done.
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    great post. I think it's unrealistic to think that we can be devoid of emotion at all times, and NEVER get hurt by others....BUT...

    It is wise to give yourself about 1.4 seconds to feel that...you know...aknowldedge your feelings and such...then promptly move into "I don't give a ****" territory.

    I never said "devoid of emotion." I'm teaching people to not let it control them.

    Good morning btw...

    good morning back. It's a happy perky rainbow day! I remember reading a post about people (aka 99% women) being terrified to wear a bathing suit...and the ensuing discussion about the best bathing suit to hide..well..pretty much everything except ankles. It was alarming to me that the opinions of others..and what they might think of the fat girl at the beach terrified people into A. buying ugly *kitten* swimsuits and B. not enjoying the beach/pool. Very sad.


    Tyra Banks said it well "kiss my fat *kitten*".

    Ok... we don't listen to anything that Tyra Banks says ever, for any reason, ever.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    ^^^Isn't that the truth, or Oprah for that matter

    Sho3girl, you are welcome
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    ^^^Isn't that the truth, or Oprah for that matter

    Sho3girl, you are welcome

    Don't you kinda wonder what Sho3girl is looking at in that picture. That could be it's own string.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    ^^^Isn't that the truth, or Oprah for that matter

    Sho3girl, you are welcome

    Don't you kinda wonder what Sho3girl is looking at in that picture. That could be it's own string.

    Yes!! What is it you are looking at girly?
  • MDG8025
    MDG8025 Posts: 4
    I sincerely wanted to hate this...but you're absolutely correct. I was bullied as a kid, made fun of growing up, and I finally had to get it into my head that these people are just mean and have nothing better to do with their pathetic lives than make others feel bad...because honestly, mean people do suck.

    I think I'm going to start carrying plastic spoons around and toss them to anyone who has something rude to say...so they can eat my *kitten*! :bigsmile: HAPPY FRIDAY!
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    I sincerely wanted to hate this...but you're absolutely correct. I was bullied as a kid, made fun of growing up, and I finally had to get it into my head that these people are just mean and have nothing better to do with their pathetic lives than make others feel bad...because honestly, mean people do suck.

    I think I'm going to start carrying plastic spoons around and toss them to anyone who has something rude to say...so they can eat my *kitten*! :bigsmile: HAPPY FRIDAY!

    The line to join the God We Hate G.C. Club forms to the right. They have t-shirts. And spoons.
  • histora
    histora Posts: 287 Member
    I sincerely wanted to hate this...but you're absolutely correct. I was bullied as a kid, made fun of growing up, and I finally had to get it into my head that these people are just mean and have nothing better to do with their pathetic lives than make others feel bad...because honestly, mean people do suck.

    I think I'm going to start carrying plastic spoons around and toss them to anyone who has something rude to say...so they can eat my *kitten*! :bigsmile: HAPPY FRIDAY!

    The line to join the God We Hate G.C. Club forms to the right. They have t-shirts. And spoons.

    Is it a T-shirt that holds my spoons for me?
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    I sincerely wanted to hate this...but you're absolutely correct. I was bullied as a kid, made fun of growing up, and I finally had to get it into my head that these people are just mean and have nothing better to do with their pathetic lives than make others feel bad...because honestly, mean people do suck.

    I think I'm going to start carrying plastic spoons around and toss them to anyone who has something rude to say...so they can eat my *kitten*! :bigsmile: HAPPY FRIDAY!

    Holds? It has a launcher.

    The line to join the God We Hate G.C. Club forms to the right. They have t-shirts. And spoons.

    Is it a T-shirt that holds my spoons for me?
  • temsabi
    temsabi Posts: 45 Member
    OP: Easier said than done, but sometimes the truth hurts. Put-downs are all about the offender wanting to regain power in a powerless situation. Thanks for pointing this out in a no BS manner!
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,324 Member
    Ok, tough-love time...
    - When you cry, they win.
    - When you're "emotionally devastated," you give them all the power.
    - When you're the "victim," you make them the "victor."

    Don't let them win.

    Gee...my mother used to tell me the same things for 10 years while I was being bullied at school. Guess what? It didnt help.

    Know how many times I was told to just GET OVER my depression? Well, guess what? That dont work.

    Now I am not saying come here and whine and expect sympathy. I learned from my parents that you dont show emotion....you dont cry where anyone can see you. You smile and pretend and think everything will be fine...and it will be. Guess what? It wont be.

    I never complain. I was indoctrinated early not to. But you don't have to show the feelings for them to win....because they wont stop. Why should they?
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    OP: Easier said than done, but sometimes the truth hurts. Put-downs are all about the offender wanting to regain power in a powerless situation. Thanks for pointing this out in a no BS manner!

    The truth doesn't have to hurt. Example, I'm an *kitten*. I own it.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,453 Member
    Only read a little of the thread. ....but "e-whine"...love it. Stealing it and finding a way to use it ASAP.

    Whiners Gaah.gif
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    Ok, tough-love time...
    - When you cry, they win.
    - When you're "emotionally devastated," you give them all the power.
    - When you're the "victim," you make them the "victor."

    Don't let them win.

    Gee...my mother used to tell me the same things for 10 years while I was being bullied at school. Guess what? It didnt help.

    Know how many times I was told to just GET OVER my depression? Well, guess what? That dont work.

    Now I am not saying come here and whine and expect sympathy. I learned from my parents that you dont show emotion....you dont cry where anyone can see you. You smile and pretend and think everything will be fine...and it will be. Guess what? It wont be.

    I never complain. I was indoctrinated early not to. But you don't have to show the feelings for them to win....because they wont stop. Why should they?

    Ok. At what point did I say any of the things contained in your response... at all?

    And you are clearly mad at your parents. Just sayin.
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    Only read a little of the thread. ....but "e-whine"...love it. Stealing it and finding a way to use it ASAP.

    Whiners Gaah.gif

    Trademarked, damn it!
  • secretgirl4611
    secretgirl4611 Posts: 474 Member
    Ok, tough-love time...

    I've seen string-after-string of "whining" and "crying" about the things other people say.

    Examples:
    - "They insulted me."
    - "They hurt my feelings."
    - "They made me sad."

    Here's a few steps to help some of you guys with the crushing things other people say...

    Step 1: Stop giving a *kitten* what other people think.
    Step 2: Repeat Step 1.

    Now I have no doubt, a handful of people will be morally outraged by what I just typed.
    Please reference Steps 1 through 2.

    (I'm sure a few of you have seen me post that on other strings)

    When you get "offended," "hurt," "insulted" and "morally outraged," you've already lost the battle, because you granted the other party all the power before you even got started. When you run to your blog or forum to e-whine about how "that big mean person made you saddy-sad," they win. And you helped them to do it.

    - When you cry, they win.
    - When you're "emotionally devastated," you give them all the power.
    - When you're the "victim," you make them the "victor."

    Don't let them win.

    FINALLY THIS ^ I AGREE 100%
    I SEE OVERLY SENSITIVE PPL AND IT BAFFLES ME WHY MOST OF THEM EVEN GIVE A S-H-I-T WHAT OTHERS HAVE TO SAY.. REALLY???!!! THIS IS OUR INNER BATTLE WE ARE TRYING TO DEFEAT, WHY LET OTHERS BRING YOU DOWN BASICALLY **** THOSE PPL! AND LEAVE IT AT THAT.. WHY GO ON AND RANT ABOUT IT? MAKES NO SENSE... IT REALLY JUST SHOWS HOW SUPER SENSITIVE SOME PPL ARE.. GROW A PAIR! GIRLS OR GUYS! :)
    LEARN TO LAUGH AT YOURSELF AND JUST BE HAPPY INSIDE AND OUT!
  • hnsaunde
    hnsaunde Posts: 757 Member
    I agree completely, I used to internalize everything. Now however, I stand up for myself, I don't cry anymore, and I either shrug it off or use it as motivation during rugby games. Perfect anger management strategy :)
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    I agree completely, I used to internalize everything. Now however, I stand up for myself, I don't cry anymore, and I either shrug it off or use it as motivation during rugby games. Perfect anger management strategy :)

    I punch things. Namely, other people trained to punch be back.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,324 Member
    [/quote]

    Ok. At what point did I say any of the things contained in your response... at all?

    And you are clearly mad at your parents. Just sayin.
    [/quote]

    You said when you cry, you let them win. I am saying you dont have to cry. If it hurts, they still win even if you laugh about it. Telling yourself that it doesn't matter what anyone says doesn't always work with everyone.

    A wise person once said personality is something you have to be born with. I didn't hate my parents. I felt sorry for them.

    ETA - to reflect past tense as my parents are both deceased.
  • lovelee79
    lovelee79 Posts: 362
    Great post! cheers to this! :drinker:
  • hnsaunde
    hnsaunde Posts: 757 Member
    I agree completely, I used to internalize everything. Now however, I stand up for myself, I don't cry anymore, and I either shrug it off or use it as motivation during rugby games. Perfect anger management strategy :)

    I punch things. Namely, other people trained to punch be back.

    I punch things as well, mainly when the ref isn't looking.
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657

    Ok. At what point did I say any of the things contained in your response... at all?

    And you are clearly mad at your parents. Just sayin.
    [/quote]

    You said when you cry, you let them win. I am saying you dont have to cry. If it hurts, they still win even if you laugh about it. Telling yourself that it doesn't matter what anyone says doesn't always work with everyone.

    A wise person once said personality is something you have to be born with. I don't hate my parents. I felt sorry for them.
    [/quote]

    I'm just curious, did you actually read my entire original post? Or just the title?
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
    I agree completely, I used to internalize everything. Now however, I stand up for myself, I don't cry anymore, and I either shrug it off or use it as motivation during rugby games. Perfect anger management strategy :)

    I punch things. Namely, other people trained to punch be back.

    I punch things as well, mainly when the ref isn't looking.

    Ok, that's just hot.
  • megsi474
    megsi474 Posts: 370 Member
    This thread is even more of a win when it's on the sidebar with another topic and it looks like it says "When You Cry... They Win. Stop. Pooping."
  • hnsaunde
    hnsaunde Posts: 757 Member
    I agree completely, I used to internalize everything. Now however, I stand up for myself, I don't cry anymore, and I either shrug it off or use it as motivation during rugby games. Perfect anger management strategy :)

    I punch things. Namely, other people trained to punch be back.

    I punch things as well, mainly when the ref isn't looking.

    Ok, that's just hot.

    Lol I don't know about that, but it sure is fun :)
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,453 Member
    Only read a little of the thread. ....but "e-whine"...love it. Stealing it and finding a way to use it ASAP.

    Whiners Gaah.gif

    Trademarked, damn it!

    Please post said TM#. Oh, whatever. I'm using it anyway. Sue me.