size 16/18 unsexy?

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Replies

  • alli_dalli
    alli_dalli Posts: 22 Member
    How rude. She ought to be reported because those sort of remarks can be harmful. The problem is that I would automatically go home and stress about what she said as I've recently gone up from a 16 to an 18. Its that sort of remark that makes it so much harder. My advice would be to write a snotty letter to the manager and then take your business elsewhere!
  • LeeshaNichole
    LeeshaNichole Posts: 179 Member
    I am really sorry you had to go through that-it just isnt right! Don't let rude people get you down. I gotta say that "sexy" has nothing to do with a size-Sexy is self confidence! You can be a size 2 or a size 28 and be sexy as hell cause you have self confidence. You can be a size 2 or a size 28 and feel down about your self-that is what other people see! If you love your self, other people will love you too! I use to have so much self confidence and I got lots of positive attention. Now if I can just get back to that place. Keep up the good work hon! :heart:
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    I lost 105 pounds about 8.5 years ago and was around a 16/18. I felt pretty damn sassy! lol Then I went into a Victoria's Secret and asked for a 38D bra. The clerk said, "We don't carry them that big." I was like WTH?! I turned around and walked out. Even when I re-lose all the weight I gained back and then some, I don't know that I'll ever buy anything from them.

    I had a similar experience with Victoria's Secret. I asked if they carried XL panties and they were like, "Um....no. But you can squeeze into a large if you want." No. I don't squeeze into nothing. I see they have larger sizes on their website but I guess I'm just wary about ordering that stuff online.

    VS carries 38D. They also carry XL panties, I used to wear them. It sounds like you both experienced idiot sales clerks.

    Can't remember if I got them online or not though, I do a lot of shopping online and VS is one of the top places I shop (clothes, swimsuits, shoes, lingerie, everything).
  • TaylorsGranddad
    TaylorsGranddad Posts: 453 Member
    So she should lose her job because she doesn't think that size is sexy and made the mistake of being honest? I agree she should be a little more professional.

    I don't think it's sexy, either... too bad you can't get me fired for it. I sure hope she doesn't have any kids depending on her paycheck for food...

    If she needs her pay to feed and clothes her kids, then maybe she learns to keep her mouth shut, her opinion to her self and just sell clothes

    That'll show her to be honest. I bet she'll be thinking about how sexy that size is all the way to the welfare office...

    While she's thinking about how she can keep her opinions to her self at the same time too
  • antiwings
    antiwings Posts: 34
    Thanks everyone, it really means alot to me that you're cheering me up. I told my boyfriend and hes furious and is going to write a letter for me.
    Needless to say I wont be shopping there again!

    Thanks again everyone.
  • teacupowl
    teacupowl Posts: 104
    I went into a underwear store and picked out a corset. It was size 20, and I'm an 18 (uk sizes) The only other size they had was a 14.
    I asked the shop assistant if they would get any 16/18 sizes in store because I was interested in buying them.
    She had this to say.
    "I'm sorry but we don;t reorder those sizes because they arn;t very sexy."

    A number of years ago, I went in Victoria's Secret in the US, and asked for a 36C bra, the assistant said "OH, we don't put THAT size out on display". My response.... "so, you are saying, you don't ACTUALLY cater for women who HAVE breasts, just the itty bitty committee?" That was over 10 years ago, and never walked in one of their stores since. I make a point of telling all my girlfriends to not shop there. If people need ironing board covers, then that is the place to shop.

    Weird. I've always been at least a C all the way up to a DD and never had a problem at VS. I had a little more trouble finding cute stuff when I was a DD, but even now at a 36D I've never had trouble there. They don't put the larger sizes on the mannequins because your standard mannequin is tiny. In fact my bra (a 36D strapless) and undies I'm wearing right now are from VS.

    This. I actually love VS and have never had a problem at my local stores. Even as I've gotten bigger they've always been a huge help to me, and the girls are fantastic. When I reached 40DD and was told they didn't carry that high in stores, the girl still went out of her way to take my measurements so I could order online, and give me recommendations for comfortable bras for my size. So yeah, I guess I luck out in the local VS department.

    As for the sales girl in the OP, that's just plain bad customer service. No matter if she has kids to feed or rent to pay, do your job the way it's supposed to be done. Instead of saying something is "unsexy", just say, "I'm sorry, we're currently out of stock in that size. Maybe try calling on [insert delivery day] and see if we have anything then. And there's always our online store. I'm so sorry for the inconvenience."

    It's all about wooing the customer, no matter what your own opinion is. Trust me, there are plenty of people I wish I could snap at where I work, but I just plaster on a smile and deal with it. You're expected to perform your job correctly, not half-*kitten* it when you're feeling cranky.
  • londongirl2012
    londongirl2012 Posts: 149 Member
    Thanks everyone, it really means alot to me that you're cheering me up. I told my boyfriend and hes furious and is going to write a letter for me.
    Needless to say I wont be shopping there again!

    Thanks again everyone.

    which shop was it?? name and shame them!!
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
    In her own awkward, insensitive way, she was just speaking the truth as she sees it.
    That's why we're here losing weight.
    Just let it go and move on, knowing that you are doing what you need to do for your health.
    Stupid people will say stupid things.
    We're bigger than that.

    It isn't her job to speak her opinion. It is her job to get the customer the product. End of story.

    Edited to add that I don't think she should be fired, but ffs complain so that she is given the right tools to better assist future customers.
    I'd be willing to bet her words mirrored the store policy. Again, we're here to lose the fat - not fight the world for just saying what 99.9% of fit people think of our obesity. People are thoughtless at times, and some can be very mean about it.
    And it's 500% harder on the ladies, so what do I really know?
    Men get a pass for some reason.
  • antiwings
    antiwings Posts: 34
    Thanks everyone, it really means alot to me that you're cheering me up. I told my boyfriend and hes furious and is going to write a letter for me.
    Needless to say I wont be shopping there again!

    Thanks again everyone.

    which shop was it?? name and shame them!!

    It was actually Ann Summers, which is terrible as I always go to them!
  • izoom3
    izoom3 Posts: 56 Member
    Dont just ask for the manager. If it is a chain find out who the CEO is and write him/her a letter. What that salesperson said was downright rude. If they don't make the item in that size then that is what should have been said. If they don't carry it that is all that should have been said. Not a comment on what they think is sexy.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member

    VS carries 38D. They also carry XL panties, I used to wear them. It sounds like you both experienced idiot sales clerks.

    Can't remember if I got them online or not though, I do a lot of shopping online and VS is one of the top places I shop (clothes, swimsuits, shoes, lingerie, everything).

    VS sells 38DD IN STORE :) I know cuz I buy them :) and I have never had a rude clerk in there...
  • WhittRak
    WhittRak Posts: 567 Member
    Haters are going to hate. She was probably dog ugly right? Hahaha. Just let the manager know about her pitiful behavior.
  • kealey1318
    kealey1318 Posts: 290 Member
    Believe it or not, LOTS of people don't find plus size people sexy. Maybe that IS the reason they don't stock it.

    Would it have been better and the OP less offended if the sales lady had used a euphemism? "I'm sorry, we don't carry HUSKY sizes... PLUS sizes... sizes for those more girth impaired (or non impaired, as the case may be?)

    Sounds like a case of butthurtery, and while I understand that since I am a large lady myself, I cannot fathom trying to get someone fired over a stupid comment. How old are we here?

    Wow, you are a very angry person, huh? Want to know what the real moral of the story is? NO ONE ASKED THE SALES LADY'S OPINION! All the OP wanted to know is if they had the size, not whether or not the size was sexy or not.

    When you work in a retail store, regardless of the size being catered to, it is your job to treat your customers/clients with respect and dignity. Should she be fired because she doesn't think the size is sexy? Of course not, that would be ludicrous. Should she be fired for deciding to share her unsolicited opinion and embarrassing/humiliating a customer? ABSOFREAKINLUTELY!

    Please restrain yourself from being so hateful. No one asked you to agree, and you are more than welcome to state your opinion. But your sarcasm and snotty attitude is irritating. Please notice that a couple other people mentioned that they personally don't find the size to be sexy, yet they are not getting any flack from it. It is your demeanor that is offensive, not your opinon.
  • wildcata77
    wildcata77 Posts: 660
    Write an email to the manager or owner. Reread it or have a friend look over it. You want to get your point across that the salesperson's comment was very rude, insensitive and unacceptable in Customer Service. Make sure your email sounds professional and not an emotional rambeling. Believe meI have had to rewrite some emails as well.

    I would be very upset. Don't let someone like this get you down. It is sexy. HUGS

    This is what I would do, too!

    Or even better, if it's a chain store, contact their customer service to let them know what a bad experience you had.
  • TaylorsGranddad
    TaylorsGranddad Posts: 453 Member
    Dont just ask for the manager. If it is a chain find out who the CEO is and write him/her a letter. What that salesperson said was downright rude. If they don't make the item in that size then that is what should have been said. If they don't carry it that is all that should have been said. Not a comment on what they think is sexy.

    EXACTLY and now you said Ann Summers they promote the bigger sizes if I remember. It's been a while since we went there.
  • cgray
    cgray Posts: 129 Member
    I bet she was jealous! People can be sexy at any size it's about the person as a whole and how they rock their style. What a dumb *kitten*.
  • JennyNotSoSkinny
    JennyNotSoSkinny Posts: 93 Member
    Remember this fact: the world is filled with *kitten* who are miserable with their own "lives" so they try to make everyone else as miserable as they are (I call them haters). Bad day or not, that was totally unprofessional, uncalled for, and she obviously doesn't want her job. Don't even worry your pretty little head about this. She is one of many idiots who are so completely unhappy that "everyone must be just as unhappy with themselves as they are". You walked in the store and showed your confidence in yourself, and she's probably thinking, "How dare she bring her *kitten* in here so HAPPY and she's a big girl!" She needs to grow up and get a life.....just saying
  • kk281
    kk281 Posts: 66 Member
    to heck with all that. sexy is a state of mind. as long as you are still trying and want to look good, thats all that counts.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member
    ]I'd be willing to bet her words mirrored the store policy. Again, we're here to lose the fat - not fight the world for just saying what 99.9% of fit people think of our obesity. People are thoughtless at times, and some can be very mean about it.
    And it's 500% harder on the ladies, so what do I really know?
    Men get a pass for some reason.

    Careful in your assumptions, not everyone on here is "obese." And there are a lot of people who are considered "normal" who are looking to loose body fat or tone-up....

    The highest I have worn is a US 14, and while slightly overweight for my height, I have NEVER been Obese... and I would bet that many women in here are similar.

    Assumptions wont get you very far...
  • londongirl2012
    londongirl2012 Posts: 149 Member
    wow Ann Summers...that shop sells sexy underwear and toys and nothing else!!....She must have been new or something to say such a stupid thing. I'm sure she will get in a lot of trouble and hopefully they will compensate you with some vouchers or goodies ! :D

    btw they had a size 16 model from a real women modelling competition
    http://www. thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/features/4056556/Ann-Summers-news-Plus-size-model-is-new-face-of-lingerie-firm.html
  • TaylorsGranddad
    TaylorsGranddad Posts: 453 Member
    Thanks everyone, it really means alot to me that you're cheering me up. I told my boyfriend and hes furious and is going to write a letter for me.
    Needless to say I wont be shopping there again!

    Thanks again everyone.

    This is whats MFP is about NOT just calories BUT support too
  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    In her own awkward, insensitive way, she was just speaking the truth as she sees it.
    That's why we're here losing weight.
    Just let it go and move on, knowing that you are doing what you need to do for your health.
    Stupid people will say stupid things.
    We're bigger than that.

    That's not why I'm here. It's not why I'm losing weight. I'm sexy now. It's not about appearance for me.
  • CookieCrumble
    CookieCrumble Posts: 221 Member
    I might have queried that, if she felt a size 16/18 was unsexy, why stock a size 20? Beyond that I wouldn't concern myself. She blurted out a stupid comment that really doesn't make sense. It's not worth getting upset over, it's one person's opinion and, as anybody who has ever interacted with anybody else knows - beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

    Forget it and move on. Don't get upset and give it credence that it doesn't have. You're stronger than that and this was really rather trivial if annoying and a bit of a jibe.... Rise above it and say to yourself, "I never did mind about the little things...". :bigsmile:
  • Helenatrandom
    Helenatrandom Posts: 1,166 Member
    You need to talk to a manager. This was a poor sales person who needs some training. It would be a kindness to the store to let them know which employee needs a training session in how to deal with customers.
  • kadins_momma07
    kadins_momma07 Posts: 328 Member
    I won't shop at Victoria's Secret, no matter what my size ends up, because they told me very specifically that while they may carry certain sizes online, they don't want 'those people' shopping in their store. They told me their policy was to never carry anything bigger than a size Large. Yeah, way to make me feel like pooey and losing a customer for a lifetime!

    The Victoria's Secret stores nea rme (in GA) carry XL, it is very limited but they do carry it in most things, and big bra sizes too. It's horrible the way "customer service reps" treat customers now days :/
  • HollywoodDJ
    HollywoodDJ Posts: 296
    "SEXY"....is a state of mind hunne....not a size! I have been ALL sizes...from a 9 to a 24 and I WAS ALWAYS SEXY....AT EVERY SIZE!!! I have had the skinny women and men tell me I am the sexiest woman they've ever seen....It isn't my size...It's my confidence and the way I carry myself. SEXY is something that is a part of the core and fabric of WHO I am. I wish every woman felt sexy and knew in their souls that they are....with make-up, with out it...dolled up or not...sweatpants or a wedding dress...it doesn't matter....SEXY is in your SOUL!

    That woman who did that....she doesn't know.....she is a product of society and what it dictates....I AM NOT.....and I hope you choose NOT to be too hunne!

    Be strong, Chin Up and keep buying those gorgeous bras and panties and whatever else makes you feel "SEXY"

    :drinker:
  • faefaith
    faefaith Posts: 433 Member
    curves rock!
  • CookieCrumble
    CookieCrumble Posts: 221 Member
    Thanks everyone, it really means alot to me that you're cheering me up. I told my boyfriend and hes furious and is going to write a letter for me.
    Needless to say I wont be shopping there again!

    Thanks again everyone.

    Really? Write your OWN letter of complaint if you want to. I think you're making a huge fuss about something that should be of no consequence to your life. I'm not much fond of this phrase but please, put on your big girl pants and sort this out like an adult who can handle their own letters of complaint. :noway:
  • Teliooo
    Teliooo Posts: 725 Member
    ]I'd be willing to bet her words mirrored the store policy. Again, we're here to lose the fat - not fight the world for just saying what 99.9% of fit people think of our obesity. People are thoughtless at times, and some can be very mean about it.
    And it's 500% harder on the ladies, so what do I really know?
    Men get a pass for some reason.

    Careful in your assumptions, not everyone on here is "obese." And there are a lot of people who are considered "normal" who are looking to loose body fat or tone-up....

    The highest I have worn is a US 14, and while slightly overweight for my height, I have NEVER been Obese... and I would bet that many women in here are similar.

    Assumptions wont get you very far...

    You are very right. I have one stone left to lose and I am still a UK size 16-18 bottom but a size 8-10 on top. Even when I lose this stone, I will probably be a size 16 still on bottom or close to that. I have just had a Inbody test and I am only very slightly over in regards to fitness. I can guarantee you that MANY men and women find me sexy at the size I am now. You can have, what some would call, a gorgeous body but very very unfit and have the same overall mortality rate of a very obese unfit person. Also, you can be very skinny but be very unattractive, does that mean that if you went to a store and asked for make up they would be allowed to say no, you can't have that, because you are too ugly?

    The store person got her words wrong and when you work in retail, there is no room for that. I deal with customers in my business every day adn you have to be very careful with what you say, no matter what your opinion is, She was acting on behalf of the store, not her own opinion and I can safely say that shareholders would not agree with her as all they want is your money.
  • MonicaT1972
    MonicaT1972 Posts: 512
    I would have talked to the manager and said "I guess my money isn't sexy enough for your store"