Why be a side-chick???

You down with OPP
Yeah you know me!

(Sorry, I just had to.)

I don't think that I need to have sex every day 5 times a day for him to stay committed. 2 times a week ( especially with a child and working 80+ hrs a week) is enough. Even when I don't get anything out of it. I gave into his needs atleast 2 times a week. Even when I didn't want to. I should not have to, or feel obligated to have sex with him if I do not want to. Therefore he should not stray. Im not saying your relationship can survive without sex. I'm saying if you NEED to have sex 5 times a day everyday for them not to stray that isn't good. I can go a week or 2 without sex. Sex is not important to me. If he decided to tell me ok, for the next year we are not having sex, I would have said ok, and I can tell you I WOULD NOT have strayed. Maybe that's just me. And I do not need sex to keep me from cheating.

Men are built a bit differently. Our bodies produce semen all the time, and it's gotta come out every 2 days or so, whether we like it or not, and we'd much rather it be with our partner. On top of that, we have 10x the testosterone as women, which puts sex on the brain. So, make it a minimum of every other day, preferably daily. (Save the 5x a day for weekends or vacations.)

Also, sounds like your man is a bit tame in bed. You should *always* "get something out of it", if he has any clue what he's doing.

You do not HAVE to release every 2 days... i call bs

I'll put it like this: What one woman won't do, another woman will. The problem is that things get complicated. You get kids, you get a mortgage, you get things in your life that bind you together. The compliments began to wane, things you used to do aren't done anymore. The relationship grows stagnant and stale. It becomes unexciting. In the end, neither party wants to hurt the other. I've been there. So suddenly, someone comes along that makes you feel like a man. They make you feel needed and wanted. It starts innocently enough at first; You're a committed man sworn to forsake all others for this relationship. However, you begin to rationalize things a little differently. You begin to feel that you deserve to be treated better. This other person begins to provide you with everything that your main girl doesn't. She becomes a supplement to what you already have like a protein shake is a supplement to your diet.

It's not right and I don't condone it, but I COMPLETELY understand where those who have been side chics are coming from. I don't find it reprehensible, disgusting, bitter, or even cheating. I know that's how society views it, but then again I don't understand the correlation between love and sex. I understand it on a fundamental level, but I don't understand it on a primal level as it relates to us as humans in regards to evolution, but I digress.

So yeah, it's messed up and people get hurt sometimes. On the other hand people deserve to find their happiness in whatever way they see fit so until you get caught I say Have fun, keep it pimpin', and let it do what it do. I agree with others though: The minute that emotions get involved, cut it loose. Also, the one woman that mentioned the wife knew, I understand that as well. That is a very real situation and happens more often than many here would care to admit. It just depends on so many factors.

This is spot on!! This is well said

You know I just have this primal need to murder someone, so I guess I should just have fun and keep it pimpin until I get caught right? You can rationalize that cheating is okay all you want, you can rationalize murder and stealing are okay too! Thats the beauty of rationalizing, you can make something irrational and wrong into something rational. If were operating under primal rules here, men or women who cheat on or steal other tribal members spouses in tribal cultures normally are allowed to be killed on the spot if caught under tribal law. I suppose if we were in a more primitive society you might think twice about banging someone else outside of your marriage? The primal argument is a crock of crap. If youre not happy in a relationship, get out of it or work on it before cheating. That is legitimate rational thinking....

You do not HAVE to release every 2 days... i call bs

I'll put it like this: What one woman won't do, another woman will. The problem is that things get complicated. You get kids, you get a mortgage, you get things in your life that bind you together. The compliments began to wane, things you used to do aren't done anymore. The relationship grows stagnant and stale. It becomes unexciting. In the end, neither party wants to hurt the other. I've been there. So suddenly, someone comes along that makes you feel like a man. They make you feel needed and wanted. It starts innocently enough at first; You're a committed man sworn to forsake all others for this relationship. However, you begin to rationalize things a little differently. You begin to feel that you deserve to be treated better. This other person begins to provide you with everything that your main girl doesn't. She becomes a supplement to what you already have like a protein shake is a supplement to your diet.

It's not right and I don't condone it, but I COMPLETELY understand where those who have been side chics are coming from. I don't find it reprehensible, disgusting, bitter, or even cheating. I know that's how society views it, but then again I don't understand the correlation between love and sex. I understand it on a fundamental level, but I don't understand it on a primal level as it relates to us as humans in regards to evolution, but I digress.

So yeah, it's messed up and people get hurt sometimes. On the other hand people deserve to find their happiness in whatever way they see fit so until you get caught I say Have fun, keep it pimpin', and let it do what it do. I agree with others though: The minute that emotions get involved, cut it loose. Also, the one woman that mentioned the wife knew, I understand that as well. That is a very real situation and happens more often than many here would care to admit. It just depends on so many factors.

You sound very successful and classy.
Best of luck to you; keep up the good work...:flowerforyou:

I'm sorry, did I at any point suggest that "class" was what I was going for? nope. Just having fun and being me. I only get one life, I am going to live it for me. I am going to do what makes me happy. And as far as public perception, if you were to meet me, you would not know what I do in my spare time. I am a lady in the courtyard, but a freak in the sheets. What I do behind closed doors has no bearing on my level of class as far as the people who need to see me as such know. So, you can keep your patronization, along with your flower.

:laugh: Nope! I love hot dogs soooo much. I would never stray from eating my hot dogs!

How can you even compare the feelings, emotions and everything else amazing about humans to piss poor acting and food? It is NO WHERE near the same thing and a horrible comparison.

You sound very successful and classy.
Best of luck to you; keep up the good work...:flowerforyou:

I'm sorry, did I at any point suggest that "class" was what I was going for? nope. Just having fun and being me. I only get one life, I am going to live it for me. I am going to do what makes me happy. And as far as public perception, if you were to meet me, you would not know what I do in my spare time. I am a lady in the courtyard, but a freak in the sheets. What I do behind closed doors has no bearing on my level of class as far as the people who need to see me as such know. So, you can keep your patronization, along with your flower.

:laugh: Nope! I love hot dogs soooo much. I would never stray from eating my hot dogs!

How can you even compare the feelings, emotions and everything else amazing about humans to piss poor acting and food? It is NO WHERE near the same thing and a horrible comparison.

The only big difference I see is that people are capable of feeling jealousy and insecurity whereas inanimate objects are not. So if a person isn't bothered by it, why is it a horrible comparison?

Maybe it's just my disinterest in romance talking if it doesn't seem like the same thing to you. I never understood why spending time with a person you love was any more significant than spending time doing an activity you love. It's all joy, in the end. I'd rather someone I cared about was happy with their life than loyal to me.

I guess if that works for you, keep on trucking. I just couldn't see myself telling my husband, that I love, that I wanted a different "dessert" one night.

Different strokes for different folks.

In my opinion, I don't always put blame on a side-chick. I have on two occasions in my life been with someone who was involved in a relationship. Not saying that would ever happen again as my bf and I have a strong, honest and wonderful relationship. We both know that the other won't cheat and have no reason to.

The reason I did it: if it's just sex to me, a man's business is not mine. I don't know what his relationship is like, I don't know how he is treated at home, I don't care what his reasons are for finding sex elsewhere. I have met some down-right nasty, evil women who are abusive to their husbands and withhold intimacy like it's a toy. I honestly DON'T feel sorry for those women when their husbands stray or find someone to fill their needs when the wife won't out of spite.

Bottom line, in my opinion, is that an affair is an issue between a man and his wife. Not the other woman.

*so you as a human being have no accountability whatsoever..?*
whats your sweet boyfriends name .. I wonder if I can lure him away. ..... . .? shouldn't be a problem for you I could care less about your intention , how much time you have put into the relationship and JUST an FYI women dont turn into nasty B@$#hs overnight ... There is always a reason.. maybe signals that the cheating was around the corner.. you are one of those sad gullible girls who believes what these poor men tell you.. first work on your values, secondly learn how to tell a rat @$$ from a "man" ... and thirdly .. just wait Karma's a hell of a teacher.

I would give you my boyfriend's name and number in a heartbeat and feel completely comfortable with you trying to lure him in. Because we have an honest, open relationship built on trust and we just work perfectly together!

Call me a sad, guillible girl if you'd like but I have to go home and have amazing sex with my wonderful bf on my lunchbreak.

As "a side piece/other woman" I would have to say the attraction is the fact that I only have the fun stuff (mainly the sex). I don't have to deal with the whiny day to day crap. I don't have to deal with the guy when he is in a bad mood, when he just wants to sit in front of the boob tube. I don't have to make him dinner or do any "wifely/girlfriend" type chores.

Then there is the question of "How can you do that to the girlfriend/wife?" Well if I didn't that doesn't mean the guy isn't going to just go out and find another chick to do it with. I figure if the wife/girlfriend was keeping up their end of the relationship deal, the guy wouldn't be coming over to visit me.

So, why not you? Rather you than somebody else, right?

I enjoy the sex with him, but I wouldn't want him full time. we get along great but he just doesn't stand up for himself and lets himself get walked all over. He has talked to his wife about needing sex (her idea of sex is once every couple of months, asked for more from her, but she is unwilling). We have been seeing eachother for a little over 3 years now.
He is my friend, I get he loves his wife, but wants sex too. I don't want any emotional love from him. I am happy being his friend and enjoying the mind blowing O's.