Friends who don't exercise?
Replies
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SonicDeathMonkey80 wrote: »
Edward Lychik would beg to differMarziPanda95 wrote: »SonicDeathMonkey80 wrote: »I don't exercise. I don't believe you have too. Not everyone has the luxury of being able to exercise. We have similar stats. Height: 158cm/5'2 or 5'3, Im not sure how the US system works. SW:60kg/132lb CW:58kg/137.6lb GW:50 kg/110lbmalavika413 wrote: »I'm a 5'3, 145 pound college student looking to be anywhere from 115-125 pounds (whatever looks best). I hate exercise and I don't have the time or energy to work it into my schedule. It seems I'm always surrounded by powerlifters, crossfitters, etc. I'm looking for friends who, like me, don't exercise (for whatever reason).
Unless one is in a vegetative state, one has the "luxury" of being able to exercise...
Or if one is disabled.
There are more types of disabilty believe me. I would LOVE to exercise, but sadly my condition means I MUST NOT. I wish it were different - in fact sometimes I've wished I had a visible disability such as a missing limb. That way at least I could exercise the remainder of my body. As it is I can't.
However I am far from vegetative, even if I only burn fractionally more than my BMR in calories each day due to my disability.0 -
zachbonner wrote: »paperpudding wrote: »Calliope610 wrote: »OP, Print out this thread, put it in a safe place. Take it out in 30 years and read all the responses. When you are 50ish and bemoaning the fact that you have assorted aches, pains and maladies associated with "getting older", you will rue the day you 'pooh-poohed" the idea of exercise.
Meh,I'm already 50ish and I don't have aches and pains or any maladies and I only do light exercise like walking and dog training.
I don't rue my lack of 'real' excercise and I have no intentions of joining a gym or similar - I don't need excuses, I'm just not doing it because I don't want to and I choose not to.
Same with OP. If she doesn't want to, that's fine. If she is not overweight there is no increased risk of diabetes by not joining gyms.
Ah, your story must be the be-all and end-all. The fact remains that the human body ages better when exercise is part of your lifestyle. I will provide scientific peer-reviewed evidence if you need it.
Of course my story is not the be all and end all, am not saying that.
But neither are the 'it is inevitable you will regret it' versions - someone even going as far as to say OP was likely to get diabetes - although not exercising is not in itself a risk factor for diabetes
( although obesity certainly is )
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Therealobi1 wrote: »paperpudding wrote: »Calliope610 wrote: »OP, Print out this thread, put it in a safe place. Take it out in 30 years and read all the responses. When you are 50ish and bemoaning the fact that you have assorted aches, pains and maladies associated with "getting older", you will rue the day you 'pooh-poohed" the idea of exercise.
Meh,I'm already 50ish and I don't have aches and pains or any maladies and I only do light exercise like walking and dog training.
I don't rue my lack of 'real' excercise and I have no intentions of joining a gym or similar - I don't need excuses, I'm just not doing it because I don't want to and I choose not to.
Same with OP. If she doesn't want to, that's fine. If she is not overweight there is no increased risk of diabetes by not joining gyms.
Walking is exercise and you don't have to join a gym I certainly haven't
OP does walk around the Uni campus - she just doesn't specifically go on walks for excercise.
When she said she doesn't excercise,she didn't mean she was totally sedentary
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I don't exercise. I don't believe you have too. Not everyone has the luxury of being able to exercise. We have similar stats. Height: 158cm/5'2 or 5'3, Im not sure how the US system works. SW:60kg/132lb CW:58kg/137.6lb GW:50 kg/110lbmalavika413 wrote: »I'm a 5'3, 145 pound college student looking to be anywhere from 115-125 pounds (whatever looks best). I hate exercise and I don't have the time or energy to work it into my schedule. It seems I'm always surrounded by powerlifters, crossfitters, etc. I'm looking for friends who, like me, don't exercise (for whatever reason).
Luxury to exercise? What's got you so busy?
I'm busy managing school + a disease. Let me add that I exercise when I can which is rarely. I usually go for a walk/run once a week for 20 minutes and also do some light exercises + stretches in my room This is all I can afford to do with the way things are. I refuse to give up on my weight loss goals simply because people are telling me that my diet is no good without exercise.
I do what I can and right now it is healthy eating.
Well, I don't even consider the school excuse. Sorry. I work a full time job and completed and MBA program AND still made time to workout. And there are people on here who have an even bigger load than me (ex. kids) that still work out. So throw that one out the window.
Now, I'm sorry you have a disease. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But, you are, in fact, exercising/ Even if a little bit. So, you do, in fact, have that luxury. No one here is saying OP should go from 0 to gym rat. Any exercise, even walking through campus, counts.
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An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.0
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malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
This is awesome. Stick with it. It will get easier. And, I hope that last sentence wasn't a shot to yourself. You are not any of those things.
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uconnwinsnc1 wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »tidefan1784 wrote: »Do you know why I have chosen for years not to exercise? Because of anxiety. Do you know where this anxiety came from? My family laughing at me, cracking jokes at me about how my fat jiggled when I was 8. Have any one of you that have dogged her anxiety ever considered that something like that happened? To this day I still hate exercise. I have numerous back issues. My doc has cleared me to do nothing but ride a stationary bike and I can't start doing that until three days after I have a procedure done on my back. I plan start hard core into this life style change then. Until then ciao!
I can understand anxiety as I have a fear of speaking in public. Fear of forgetting what to say and what people think so this is something I need to work on. The thought of face to face presentation makes me feel sick. A colleague said she would help me with that
In terms of people laughing at me doing the wrong moves in zumba or looking a right plonker learning how to ride a bike in a busy lonDon park I honestly couldn't care less as none of them knew me.
Help is what is needed in this situition not avoidance
I have had awful anxiety in my past. I blew potential relationships. I blew academic opportunities. I had the confidence of an overcooked baby carrot.
I threw myself out there when I was in my early 20's and said, "**** it." I tanked with women, I tanked with athletics, I screwed up academically. I put myself in every awkward position possible. I put myself in every challenge possible. I needed to fix my problems.
I used to have my friends sign me up for karaoke in the student union and not tell me what song I would be singing. I'd then have to go up in front of everyone in the building and sing a completely ridiculous song right on the spot. I used to go into the gym with my 250 pound man boobs and play basketball against kids who spent their whole life playing. I would bench press next to D1 football players and look like a complete wimp. I went to parties and I talked to girls that were, "out of my league" and often failed miserably. I did everything possible to put myself in stressful social situations just to see how I could deal with it.
It was a comical mess from an outsiders perspective. But now? I am happy I did it.
Edited fact: You never realize Hotel California is a 7 minute song until you have to sing it in front of people. There is like a 3 minute guitar solo that is honestly the most awkward part of any song ever. I literally just stood there and looked at people...My friends will never forget it. The first song I ever song was this one and it was the funniest disaster of my life:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qnSz6Lh5pY
If this is true, then YOU ROCK
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malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
That's really good!
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malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
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yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I am touching on other issues that need to be talked about that will help her do the C25K program. I had talks with friend (OP). She told me somethings I care to not share here being they are very personal to her.
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yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I am touching on other issues that need to be talked about that will help her do the C25K program. I had talks with friend (OP). She told me somethings I care to not share here being they are very personal to her.
Then why even hint at them here. Take it to PM. Seriously.0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I am touching on other issues that need to be talked about that will help her do the C25K program. I had talks with friend (OP). She told me somethings I care to not share here being they are very personal to her.
Then why even hint at them here. Take it to PM. Seriously.
Good point maybe I was just trying to help the way OP project herself here since a lot of people have called her out but did not take one second to figure out why. I think the very first or second comment that was deleted was a direct attack to OP that we still never got a explanation for.
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yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I am touching on other issues that need to be talked about that will help her do the C25K program. I had talks with friend (OP). She told me somethings I care to not share here being they are very personal to her.
Then why even hint at them here. Take it to PM. Seriously.
Good point maybe I was just trying to help the way OP project herself here since a lot of people have called her out but did not take one second to figure out why. I think the very first or second comment that was deleted was a direct attack to OP that we still never got a explanation for.
Yeah, I guess. The thread started to shift positive though and you just put it right back into the negative.
OP said she's going to try it out - let's give her a round of applause for that step and leave it be!0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I am touching on other issues that need to be talked about that will help her do the C25K program. I had talks with friend (OP). She told me somethings I care to not share here being they are very personal to her.
Then why even hint at them here. Take it to PM. Seriously.
Good point maybe I was just trying to help the way OP project herself here since a lot of people have called her out but did not take one second to figure out why. I think the very first or second comment that was deleted was a direct attack to OP that we still never got a explanation for.
Yeah, I guess. The thread started to shift positive though and you just put it right back into the negative.
OP said she's going to try it out - let's give her a round of applause for that step and leave it be!
You are right.
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looks best clothed or looks best in a swimsuit? big difference! be specific about your goals and ytou'll get way more specific advice
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looks best clothed or looks best in a swimsuit? big difference! be specific about your goals and ytou'll get way more specific advice
Eh, I don't wear swimsuits. I'd settle for looking good in jeans and a t-shirt. But maybe I'll be able to wear a swimsuit someday if I lose weight.:)0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I didn't see his post as negative. Negative self talk is a bad habit, I know. I'm working on it. It's hard to see yourself in a positive light, or even fake it, when you've felt awful about yourself for years--especially when it comes to physical appearance.0 -
uconnwinsnc1 wrote: »What a shame it is how you talk to her.
What a shame it is how you talk to everyone.
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malavika413 wrote: »Eh, I don't wear swimsuits. I'd settle for looking good in jeans and a t-shirt. But maybe I'll be able to wear a swimsuit someday if I lose weight.:)
You can wear one now. Seriously, wearing one and swimming and enjoying the water is way better than not wearing one because you're too self-conscious.
I don't enjoy the beach very much; I'm a fair-skinned redhead and I burn in like 10 seconds in the sun. But I still own a swimsuit and go to the beach or to the pool sometimes, and my friends certainly don't judge me -- they're just happy to have me around.
There's no rule you have to be a certain size to wear a swimsuit.0 -
malavika413 wrote: »Eh, I don't wear swimsuits. I'd settle for looking good in jeans and a t-shirt. But maybe I'll be able to wear a swimsuit someday if I lose weight.:)
You can wear one now. Seriously, wearing one and swimming and enjoying the water is way better than not wearing one because you're too self-conscious.
I don't enjoy the beach very much; I'm a fair-skinned redhead and I burn in like 10 seconds in the sun. But I still own a swimsuit and go to the beach or to the pool sometimes, and my friends certainly don't judge me -- they're just happy to have me around.
There's no rule you have to be a certain size to wear a swimsuit.
That's true, and I do have one. But it's a fat girl swimsuit and wearing it just reminds me of how far I have to go. I'm not a swimmer anyway, so there aren't really opportunities to wear it.0 -
malavika413 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Why do you keep using this negative talk about yourself friend? Now sometimes I do use it to motivate me. You using it it not helping you though.
I think I remember a lot of what you feel is in your head. You don't want to be sweating (working to better yourself) in front of your boyfriend. You told me a lot of other things that you feel other people think but you do not know that unless you ask.
Now real talk. You call yourself gross right. Exercise can and will change that outlook on yourself. The first step which you already made was to change your eating habit which is get. I have the fitness side down and still working to make my diet better.
If you find yourself gross why are you not doing 100% effort to change that. Everyone keeps bring exercise of some form into this equation because it will help you get to where you want to be.
I also remember you were seeing someone. Do you find this helpful? If too personal to put here you can always PM a friend.
Did you actually read her post?
She has decided to do a C25K with her boyfriend. Yay for her!
I didn't see his post as negative. Negative self talk is a bad habit, I know. I'm working on it. It's hard to see yourself in a positive light, or even fake it, when you've felt awful about yourself for years--especially when it comes to physical appearance.
I know that my delivery was very tough but I know I have build enough rapport to know that she was not going to discard it.
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yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »I remember being a noob. We do not forget those things. I remember benching my very first time at 95 pounds. I also remember being the same weight I am now if not more when I first started lifting when I was 17. Did I feel this pressure others feel going to the gym with the in shape. I have to say I never felt like I was not welcome in a gym. I felt not welcome in a bar which is another story.
I hate generalizations... but I suspect it's different for most men than it is for most women.
I've very often felt very unwelcome in a gym. Not so much in a bar.
So people still laugh at the person who cannot perform to a certain physical level. Is the gym like grade school back when I was five?
As a woman who started going to the gym while in the morbidly obese category, I can say that the gyms I've been to have never felt like grade school. It's always been a warm, pleasant atmosphere where the staff and other gym goers are helpful, especially if you aren't sure what to do. There's tons of stuff that I still can't do and I've never once been made fun of.
This makes me exceptionally sad.
I see so many women on this site who are on the cusp of being brave enough and launching themselves into better overall fitness and someone comes along and announces that the gym is nothing more than an exclusive clubhouse filled with an insensitive crowd of indecent bullies who gang up on overweight people by calling names and alienating them.
That is not a gym.
That is not how you see a gym when you are there 3-5 days a week for years and years. You see it as a safe haven. A second home. Somewhere to run to when you are alone and broken and defeated and unloved. Somewhere you can gather yourself before a fight. Your secret lair. Your BatCave. shared with your brothers in arms.
People don't go to the gym to point and laugh at people who are starting.
People who frequent gyms also know a bit of the timing of the demographics that roll through the gym as well.
In the evenings on Thursday/Friday nights and Saturday afternoons - it's a social arena. It's when the flirting and the joking and the playing happens. Between 2 and 4:30, its the highschool kids.
If THESE are the demographics you are avoiding, then recognize that is the goals and habits of certain people at certain times that you would prefer to avoid - that it isnt THE BIG EVIL GYM FULL OF BULLIES.
yall break my heart.
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yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »I remember being a noob. We do not forget those things. I remember benching my very first time at 95 pounds. I also remember being the same weight I am now if not more when I first started lifting when I was 17. Did I feel this pressure others feel going to the gym with the in shape. I have to say I never felt like I was not welcome in a gym. I felt not welcome in a bar which is another story.
I hate generalizations... but I suspect it's different for most men than it is for most women.
I've very often felt very unwelcome in a gym. Not so much in a bar.
So people still laugh at the person who cannot perform to a certain physical level. Is the gym like grade school back when I was five?
As a woman who started going to the gym while in the morbidly obese category, I can say that the gyms I've been to have never felt like grade school. It's always been a warm, pleasant atmosphere where the staff and other gym goers are helpful, especially if you aren't sure what to do. There's tons of stuff that I still can't do and I've never once been made fun of.
This makes me exceptionally sad.
I see so many women on this site who are on the cusp of being brave enough and launching themselves into better overall fitness and someone comes along and announces that the gym is nothing more than an exclusive clubhouse filled with an insensitive crowd of indecent bullies who gang up on overweight people by calling names and alienating them.
That is not a gym.
That is not how you see a gym when you are there 3-5 days a week for years and years. You see it as a safe haven. A second home. Somewhere to run to when you are alone and broken and defeated and unloved. Somewhere you can gather yourself before a fight. Your secret lair. Your BatCave. shared with your brothers in arms.
People don't go to the gym to point and laugh at people who are starting.
People who frequent gyms also know a bit of the timing of the demographics that roll through the gym as well.
In the evenings on Thursday/Friday nights and Saturday afternoons - it's a social arena. It's when the flirting and the joking and the playing happens. Between 2 and 4:30, its the highschool kids.
If THESE are the demographics you are avoiding, then recognize that is the goals and habits of certain people at certain times that you would prefer to avoid - that it isnt THE BIG EVIL GYM FULL OF BULLIES.
yall break my heart.
so this +1000000000000000000000000000000000000
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malavika413 wrote: »An update on my end. My fitness-averse boyfriend decided he wanted to work out with me. Despite the fact that I'm very very nervous about sweating in front of him, or in front of other people in general, I'm going to give it a shot. We're going to try out the C25K thing on Saturday and see if we want to complete the program. I just really hope I don't chicken out (I've chickened out before) because I'm scared of being out of shape in front of him. Yes, he's out of shape too, but he's not chubby and gross.
Enjoy it together. i wish my bf would do something like that with me.0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »I remember being a noob. We do not forget those things. I remember benching my very first time at 95 pounds. I also remember being the same weight I am now if not more when I first started lifting when I was 17. Did I feel this pressure others feel going to the gym with the in shape. I have to say I never felt like I was not welcome in a gym. I felt not welcome in a bar which is another story.
I hate generalizations... but I suspect it's different for most men than it is for most women.
I've very often felt very unwelcome in a gym. Not so much in a bar.
So people still laugh at the person who cannot perform to a certain physical level. Is the gym like grade school back when I was five?
As a woman who started going to the gym while in the morbidly obese category, I can say that the gyms I've been to have never felt like grade school. It's always been a warm, pleasant atmosphere where the staff and other gym goers are helpful, especially if you aren't sure what to do. There's tons of stuff that I still can't do and I've never once been made fun of.
This makes me exceptionally sad.
I see so many women on this site who are on the cusp of being brave enough and launching themselves into better overall fitness and someone comes along and announces that the gym is nothing more than an exclusive clubhouse filled with an insensitive crowd of indecent bullies who gang up on overweight people by calling names and alienating them.
That is not a gym.
That is not how you see a gym when you are there 3-5 days a week for years and years. You see it as a safe haven. A second home. Somewhere to run to when you are alone and broken and defeated and unloved. Somewhere you can gather yourself before a fight. Your secret lair. Your BatCave. shared with your brothers in arms.
People don't go to the gym to point and laugh at people who are starting.
People who frequent gyms also know a bit of the timing of the demographics that roll through the gym as well.
In the evenings on Thursday/Friday nights and Saturday afternoons - it's a social arena. It's when the flirting and the joking and the playing happens. Between 2 and 4:30, its the highschool kids.
If THESE are the demographics you are avoiding, then recognize that is the goals and habits of certain people at certain times that you would prefer to avoid - that it isnt THE BIG EVIL GYM FULL OF BULLIES.
yall break my heart.
I would be completely lost without my gym. I'm so glad I took that first step to join.0 -
me too. I wish I had discovered lifting before I was 37. It has changed my life0
This discussion has been closed.
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