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I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: you don't, because in this universe everyone has amazing, effort free abs. You are no longer a special snowflake. Don't even need push-ups.

    Wish: I could plant a flag on the moon

    I welcome the lack of pushups.

    Granted, you travel to the moon and plant a flag. Then sit down and wait patiently for your flag to grow. Your specially padded helmet keeps you from being harmed as you fall sleep randomly while waiting for it to sprout. Your fellow lunar colonists stop by every few days to change your drool cup and pat your head as they ask you how your new flag is growing. You no longer hear the snickers as they walk away.

    I wish you could see how ridiculous you looked waiting for that flag to grow.

    Major LOL

    Granted: I see everything clearly now. All illusions removed. How could I be so blind. I also see that moment you fall on your *kitten* during crossfit and I laugh and laugh! So, I feel better about things.

    Wish: I had packed my "Go" bag

  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted: Too bad your confined to your house and can never GO anywhere ever!

    I wish I was more prepared for WTSHTF!
  • MaxPower0102
    MaxPower0102 Posts: 2,654 Member
    Granted, but that stands for Wading Through *kitten*, Hair Ties First.

    I wish I was more popular with the ladies.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted! Now you are constantly stalked by Psychopathic women who want to shave your head and dress you up in Doll clothes wigs and lipstick!

    I wish I could start the year over!
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    Granted but you start over a few 1000 yrs ago... Where my berries cave woman??

    I wish she wasn't picking the club up right now
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted but it's now a Sword with which I'm still gonna knock you into the right century!

    I wish I was born in the 20's
  • cblue315
    cblue315 Posts: 3,836 Member
    Granted, remember this is a time when hot running water was a luxury and about 25% of homes did not have a bathtub. What is that smell?

    I wish I could live my cat's life.
  • kjm3579
    kjm3579 Posts: 3,974 Member
    Granted, you now have your cat's life but a pack of pit bulls also lives in your house -- have fun little puff ball.

    I wish I was independently wealthy
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: But your dependents number in the hundreds of thousands. You are going to need every dime for their expenses. They have lavish tastes.

    Wish: I lived next to a National Forest
  • guitarrckr
    guitarrckr Posts: 1,717 Member
    granted...but there would be a tornado once a month.

    "I wish I was big"....lmao
  • khara2012
    khara2012 Posts: 1,051 Member
    Granted. You are big, and big hearted, so every time you sleep with a girl, you gift her with a mansion when you're done. You are bankrupt, but you are big! :) Congratulations.

    I wish Captain America was real, and in love with me, not that other girl!

  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    khara2012 wrote: »
    Granted. You are big, and big hearted, so every time you sleep with a girl, you gift her with a mansion when you're done. You are bankrupt, but you are big! :) Congratulations.

    I wish Captain America was real, and in love with me, not that other girl!

    Granted, Cap is real as is his love and devotion to you though he thinks you're his dog because the Super Soldier Serum was just saline. He's pushing 100 and you're pushing him in his wheelchair. But you get to keep the shield.

    I wish I still worked in the comic book industry.
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
    Wish is granted, but you work in the basement where all the trash ends up from the printing presses and nobody goes down there except the maintenance man, and he's pushing 83, and then there are the rats.

    I wish I could spend a week on the Space Station
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    Granted. He's plopped in front of the TV wearing a torn undershirt and asking you to get him a beer.

    I wish I would get the job I just interviewed for.
  • GeeLeeBessey
    GeeLeeBessey Posts: 3
    47Jacqueline wrote: »
    Granted. He's plopped in front of the TV wearing a torn undershirt and asking you to get him a beer.

    I wish I would get the job I just interviewed for.

    Granted but your boss turns out to be the biggest slave driver in town

    I wish I could get more than three hrs sleep at a time!!
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Granted...now you sleep day and night ...never to wake.
    I wish for happiness
  • khara2012
    khara2012 Posts: 1,051 Member
    Granted. You were hit by a drunk driver riding your bicycle down the street without a helmet. Your brain is barely functioning, but you feel happy, all day every day. However, you have no idea what happiness really is or why you are feeling it.

    I wish I hadn't been drunk, driving home from a bar alone, and hit that poor lady on her bike.
    slimgirljo15 wrote: »
    Granted...now you sleep day and night ...never to wake.
    I wish for happiness

  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted! Not ruining this one! ;)

    I wish I could have ruined that wish!
  • khara2012
    khara2012 Posts: 1,051 Member
    Granted! I didn't hit that poor lady with my car. It was her neighbor. ;)

    I wish I could get the sounds and images out of my head of the guy at the gym today making his sex sounds while lifting his weights.
  • cblue315
    cblue315 Posts: 3,836 Member
    Granted, now he sounds like a granny doing phone sex.

    I wish the guys would come back and liven things up a bit.
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
    The guys came back but they bored you to tears

    I wish there were more people in here this morning
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: there are more people in here; here being the inside of the telephone booth. Trying to break the world record, but the door got jammed & now all of these fine people, stacked on one another are running out of air. Who planned this event? Fire them.

    Wish: my bike had streamers
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: there are more people in here; here being the inside of the telephone booth. Trying to break the world record, but the door got jammed & now all of these fine people, stacked on one another are running out of air. Who planned this event? Fire them.

    Wish: my bike had streamers

    Granted. Your bike is festooned with birthday party streamers because you rolled right through a back yard Bday bbq, plowed over the Bday boy, flattened his cake and took down all the decorations as one of your drunken morning bike rides have resulted in catastrophe yet again. But at least you have three new Lego sets ... Once you untangle the gift ribbons from your spokes.

    I wish I hadn't had all that chocolate fondue last night.
  • DrWhoIsYerDad
    DrWhoIsYerDad Posts: 263 Member
    Granted but they are so long they get stuck in your spokes.

    I wish I had a light sabre.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    DrWhoIsYerDad wrote: »
    Granted but they are so long they get stuck in your spokes.

    I wish I had a light sabre.

    Granted but the first day you have it, it gets jammed. You look down the barrel to see what's wrong ... And it goes off. The force is with you alright.

    I wish I wasn't so sluggish today.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: you are not sluggish, but you are a slug. I just poured on the salt.

    Wish: I could bring the fury
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: you are not sluggish, but you are a slug. I just poured on the salt.

    Wish: I could bring the fury

    Granted wherever you go, you bring a Samuel Jackson Nick Fury action figure which you make speak in a grating baby voice. It makes for awkward moments at events. Especially when you make it spout prophecies about other people's impending demise. You are NOT a hit at cocktail parties.

    I wish my milkshake brought all the girls to the yard.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    edited February 2015
    Granted: it does. You spend hours making shakes for girls who don't appreciate them & basically purge them (on you), cause it's not in their macros. You are wasting your culinary talents. Pity.

    Wish: I could find the ripcord
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: it does. You spend hours making shakes for girls who don't appreciate them & basically purge them (on you), cause it's not in their macros. You are wasting your culinary talents. Pity.

    Wish: I could find the ripcord

    Granted, but you're in the middle of the Intrepid museum and you just deployed a WWII parachute that knocked over a catered table celebrating a military Bday. There birthday cake everywhere and you holding a ripcord. What do to have against cake?

    I wish I wasn't holding this right now.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: you are NOT holding it....together. That is why I am visiting you at the asylum. I will always be your friend, anyway. I will always bring you cake.

    Wish: I had cake
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