We broke up because...
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Replies
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She needed to be locked up..a hazard to society0
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She told me she was knocked up0
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He was not baby Daddy material.0
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Said she was pregnant and it was mine on the first date.0
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He couldn't tell the difference between 'he' and 'she'0
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Found out she was born a he.0
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He wanted me to give birth. I thought it was premature.0
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He didn't like Little Rascals0
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She was always out rascalling the whole football team0
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Would only make out with me on the fifty yard line.0
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Wanted sex outside in 40 below..0
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She never went below....0
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She never came up for air and suffocated0
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She was into scuba diving0
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She didn't want to take the plunge with me0
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I couldnt hold my breath as long as her
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Everything had to be done under water. I was scared0
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I didnt take her breath away!0
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She ran away with the spoon0
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I always came home and caught her Spooning the Gardener!0
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Didn't appreciate my well-groomed garden
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Wasnt so well groomed..there were critters running around her garden
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0
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She didn't talk in complete sentences0
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Ate all my food0
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She's way more badass than me and I couldn't stop comparing!0
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I didn't call her Jessica
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Ran off with the neighbours daughter0
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ran off with the neighbor's husband...0
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she was playing midnight poker with all the men in the neighborhood.0
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