We broke up because...

SliverBulletsUK

I don't actually remember why, we started fooling around, she got excited then I woke up in hospital

jgkoutr

Ate all my chips and salsa

Kvm11628

She kept chopping away at my self esteem

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

She was always wanting to "axe" me a question. I was scared for my life.

x0lcbaby0x

He flirted too much with other women lol

nowweseeyou

We broke up?

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

She thought I was flirting when clearly I was just explaining how awesome I am.

Kvm11628

I couldn't fit his ego into my house

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Had too much junk.

jgkoutr

He was obsessed w yard sales always buying junk

Kvm11628

Had a vast collection of guys' junk pics

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

She was always trying to make me wear lingerie. I just felt weird.

jgkoutr

She would never let me touch her junk

Kvm11628

If she would only trim those talons....

jgkoutr

I'd wake up to her sucking on my toes

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

It was okay for her to have long nails but not for me. hypocrite!

jgkoutr

He never brushed his teeth

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

jgkoutr wrote: »

He never brushed his teeth

She was a huuuuuuge liar.

Kvm11628

She had no teeth. Nasty meth habit.

jgkoutr

But I kicked the habit...u just stopped loving me

Mr_Stabbems

She used to scream Walter at climax

Kvm11628

Told me the lab was for chemistry tutoring, how wrong that was....

Mr_Stabbems

The only blue I saw was when she held on too tight...you don't squeeze it ffs!!

Kvm11628

He was looking for someone a bit looser

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

He would always take my clothes.

Kvm11628

He would hide my clothes when I was in the shower

Mr_Stabbems

Kvm11628 wrote: »

He was looking for someone a bit looser

To be fair it never really fit. I was doing you a favour by leaving.

jgkoutr

He never wore any clothes when my mom came over

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Wanted her mom to move in.

Mr_Stabbems

Constant hugging whilst starkers was getting irritating