We broke up because...

Mr_Stabbems

I couldnt identify the gender..

Laura5678mfp

He didn't let me touch his beard

Kvm11628

She had a beard. I didn't play on that team.

Unknown

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Kvm11628

She never invited me to play. Sniff.

Mr_Stabbems

She played far far too much

Kvm11628

He was too conservative

Unknown

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Mr_Stabbems

She cared too much for fashion in the bedroom. Yet never complained about my union jack underwear

Unknown

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Mr_Stabbems

She insisted that I wear them but they couldn't contain my manliness

Laura5678mfp

She always steals my clothes

Unknown

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Mr_Stabbems

They never let me watch. I had to record from hidden cams

Kvm11628

He had pervy tendencies

Unknown

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Laura5678mfp

She secretly wanted to be involved

Unknown

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cmDaffy

She wanted to replace the handcuffs with soft bindings... It was a little too "Vanilla" for me

Mr_Stabbems

She couldn't take it that I cried at the end of zoolander 2

cmDaffy

He cried during sex

Unknown

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Mr_Stabbems

The cat scratched her when her mouth was full....she had no sympathy & couldn't handle my tears

cmDaffy

He was a cat person, I don't like cats

Arathels

He bit me.. like all the time.. I'm covered in bite marks!

Mr_Stabbems wrote: »

The cat scratched her when her mouth was full....she had no sympathy & couldn't handle my tears

Sorry @cmDaffy

She never trained me in belly dancing

Kvm11628

Didn't like my love nips

Mr_Stabbems

Her nips meant I needed skin grafts!

SliverBulletsUK

With a smile and a wink she suggested we should do some 'Adult wrestling' but then got very upset when I hit her with a chair and put her through the table

Kvm11628

Found little alcohol nips stashed all through the house. He was a closet drinker.

Unknown

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