Tired of explaining my diet to people
ashtonlv
Posts: 4
Anyone else having the frustration of people constantly asking you to explain your diet and goals to them? I wish I could just say "no thank you" to food being offered without them asking why and having to explain. Then when I say that I'm watching what I eat it's like it becomes a debate issue and I'm having to defend myself and/or repeat my refusal several times. I don't really want to have to discuss it, it's tiresome. Am I alone in this? Sorry for the rant but I'm wondering if other people have had the same experience and have tactics that are effective at cutting off the line of questioning that comes after turning down food or eating related invitations without being rude.
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Well, first of all, there is no reason to turn down invitations for lunch, dinner, etc. If you practice moderation and learn how to order foods that fit into your macros when you are out, then you should be fine at most events.
If someone offers you something that you don't like, just say no thank you. If they press you, just say you aren't hungry or you just ate. I don't talk to people about my diet because 1) it's not a diet, it's just how I live my life and 2) it opens up a debate.
If they continue to press, just say you don't want to discuss it and move on.0 -
I use to have the same issue but when I am offered food I just say no thank you I just ate. If tell them I am on a diet it opens it up for discussion. My neighbor who is in great shape and is in her early 70 told me to either say no thank you I just ate and if they insist just tell them to pack it up for later then just toss it or give it to someone else.0
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i just dont share that i am on a diet with rando people.
instead i say "no thanks" to food (which is perfectly polite and fine), and if people try to prod, i just say "i am not hungry"/"i dont want to eat right now"/"i am not really a fan of (whatever ingredient is questionable)" and then end that conversation. i also find it helps to keep a stoic face when doing this. sometimes if you smile, it is misinterpreted as you actually wanting the food but being "nice" and saying no.
if someone really tries to prod, then THEY are being the rude one, and then it totally opens the conversation up to "i dont really want to talk about my eating habits, sorry." "please stop asking" or "that just isnt healthy and i am eating healthy, so again, no thank you."
you really dont have to go into details with anyone. unless they're expressing concern (and even so), it is perfectly acceptable to shut down the conversation whether with your words or body language.0 -
I say no thank you and if I get pressed I tell them to back off. Rude? Probably some people think so, but it's my right to turn down an offer and I don't owe an explination.0
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I totally understand and get frustrated with it myself sometimes. I even get laughed at by my friends for not ordering straight off the menu, making modifications, and weighing my food. But you know what? If they keep on prodding and poking, I just say, "Look at you and look at me. Who's doing it right?" That usually shuts them up. I'm also tired of people saying, "Don't get too skinny." That's none of their business, first off, but it makes me feel like saying to them, "Don't get too fat." But that's not "politically correct."0
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If you don't make a fuss about your diet people typically don't ask beyond making a passing comment. Don't engage with them on the subject and you will not have to discuss it.0
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I can see where you are coming from however you don't have to give up everything. You can simply choose something off the menu that fits within your calorie limit. I have not turned down one invite for lunch, dinner or happy hour. I just go knowing that I will find something that works for me. For example- if we are going to a wings place, I will get naked tenders and veggie boat. That just happens to be what I want to order. Just like I don't question others food choices.
If I am offered something that I don't like I just say "I am not a fan of that food but thank you for the offer." I mean there are some healthy foods that I would not touch with a 10 foot poll.
Just go and enjoy!
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i just dont share that i am on a diet with rando people.
instead i say "no thanks" to food (which is perfectly polite and fine), and if people try to prod, i just say "i am not hungry"/"i dont want to eat right now"/"i am not really a fan of (whatever ingredient is questionable)" and then end that conversation. i also find it helps to keep a stoic face when doing this. sometimes if you smile, it is misinterpreted as you actually wanting the food but being "nice" and saying no.
if someone really tries to prod, then THEY are being the rude one, and then it totally opens the conversation up to "i dont really want to talk about my eating habits, sorry." "please stop asking" or "that just isnt healthy and i am eating healthy, so again, no thank you."
you really dont have to go into details with anyone. unless they're expressing concern (and even so), it is perfectly acceptable to shut down the conversation whether with your words or body language.
See, I wouldn't even get into the "what's healthy" conversation. That just begs for a debate.
If someone presses, just say "isn't there something better we can discuss? How about [insert new topic]."0 -
Liftng4Lis wrote: »
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You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.0
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You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
How often do you see your in-laws? How often do they offer to bring you dinner?0 -
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For me, because I'm only trying to lose a few pounds I get a lot of "You don't need to lose weight, why are you on a diet?" or "one cookie won't kill you" type remarks. Well sorry people. I'm 5'1 if I eat more than 1200 calories a day I won't lose weight. My friend who is 5'9"....sure a cookie won't kill her diet but for me I have to be really careful (or find 2 hours a day to exercise which isn't practical for me). I have this figured out. I know what works for me and if that cookie puts me over my 1200 it won;t work, period.
So I usually don't say anything about a diet...if they offer me something I can;t fit into my daily calorie count I just say "no thanks, I'm fine." or "I brought my lunch" or "I have other plans" they don;t need a reason why every time. Sometime I lie and say I already ate or just had a snack. lol
If they ask personal questions about your goals you can always say, "Sorry, that's not something I'm sharing with others."0 -
- No thanks, I already ate
- No thanks, I packed my own lunch
- No thanks, I'm going to go for a ride at lunch...
There's really no need to discuss your diet. Also, healthful living is not "normal"...so get used to some ridicule and "c'mon" kind of *kitten*. Also, you may need to expand your perception of "healthy"...it's not like you can't ever enjoy yourself ever again. I usually ride at lunch, but it's snowing today...so I'm going to go have some pizza with the guys from the office...like a slice or two, not the whole pie. It's fine...no biggie.0 -
You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
That's called making a fuss.0 -
For me, because I'm only trying to lose a few pounds I get a lot of "You don't need to lose weight, why are you on a diet?" or "one cookie won't kill you" type remarks. Well sorry people. I'm 5'1 if I eat more than 1200 calories a day I won't lose weight. My friend who is 5'9"....sure a cookie won't kill her diet but for me I have to be really careful (or find 2 hours a day to exercise which isn't practical for me). I have this figured out. I know what works for me and if that cookie puts me over my 1200 it won;t work, period.
So I usually don't say anything about a diet...if they offer me something I can;t fit into my daily calorie count I just say "no thanks, I'm fine." or "I brought my lunch" or "I have other plans" they don;t need a reason why every time. Sometime I lie and say I already ate or just had a snack. lol
If they ask personal questions about your goals you can always say, "Sorry, that's not something I'm sharing with others."
A two-hour workout for a cookie? You're doing it wrong.0 -
Not really. But then again, the MyFitnessPal guidelines of "moderation" are pretty easy to explain--I went out with a friend yesterday and had a gourmet cheeseburger and broccoli (instead of fries) and beer and it met my macros. I also weighed-in for a loss today.Anyone else having the frustration of people constantly asking you to explain your diet and goals to them? I wish I could just say "no thank you" to food being offered without them asking why and having to explain.
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You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
I don't get this either, but I have seen it happen to my friends and my brother (who is married). Apparently not eating the exact same thing as the family is rude to some people. If that is the case, and you are willing to modify your day for the idea of family unity, you can eat a healthy meal from the Chinese place and then push your cheat meal to tomorrow.
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anaisbutterfly7 wrote: »You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
I don't get this either, but I have seen it happen to my friends and my brother (who is married). Apparently not eating the exact same thing as the family is rude to some people. If that is the case, and you are willing to modify your day for the idea of family unity, you can eat a healthy meal from the Chinese place and then push your cheat meal to tomorrow.
It's not just not eating the same thing in this case. It's a matter of being grateful for a kind gesture, which is treating them to dinner. If this were me, I'd eat a portion that fit into my calories for the day and save my cheat meal for another night.0 -
Could you simply move this "cheat night" (hopefully not too much!) by one day, and have a moderate portion of Chinese? I like Panda Express--many reasonable options.My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion.
This, too.It's a matter of being grateful for a kind gesture, which is treating them to dinner. 0 -
You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
I'd suck it up and have Chinese, make Saturday my cheat meal, and be grateful that someone else is paying.0 -
KarenFord1988 wrote: »I totally understand and get frustrated with it myself sometimes. I even get laughed at by my friends for not ordering straight off the menu, making modifications, and weighing my food. But you know what? If they keep on prodding and poking, I just say, "Look at you and look at me. Who's doing it right?" That usually shuts them up. I'm also tired of people saying, "Don't get too skinny." That's none of their business, first off, but it makes me feel like saying to them, "Don't get too fat." But that's not "politically correct."
^^ I'm glad I'm not the only one who gives peoples' attitudes about my food choices or my body right back to 'em. I'm LOL'ing so hard right now 0 -
It drives me nuts that moderation doesn't end well for me and I have to keep explaining that. I've decided to tell people it's not an addiction or a satiety issue or carb cravings or some emotional compulsion or anything else. It's just that I enjoy quietly hating on all you people who can effortlessly have one piece of cake and then walk away satisfied. I am enjoying my bellyful of hatred, okay? So I'm going to be off in this corner with my steak, scowling at all the normal-weight people cruising the dessert bar for sensible portions to fit into their daily allotment. Because I like it!0
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I know what you are going through. I have lost ove 75 LBS and people ALWAYS look at my food and criticise what I eat. Many people give me their diet ideas and suggestions and I want to tell them to F off because they are bad plans and I CLEARLY know better. The worst is people telling me I lost too much weight or I'm not eating enough protein or WHATEVER. I have been overweight since I could remember, I worked hard for this. Let me attain my goals and you stick to yours. I am doing this properly and am not starving myself (I LOVE FOOD). Back off people hehe0
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People ALWAYS push food on me. I am not always dieting but (I bring my own food and don't need handouts. Especially crackers or cookies. If my lunch is not "big enough" too bad for me I'm an adult JEEZ0
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" I'll worry about me, you worry about you " That will end just about any do gooders prodding into your biz, be it diet or otherwise.0
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carlyy4589 wrote: »People ALWAYS push food on me. I am not always dieting but (I bring my own food and don't need handouts. Especially crackers or cookies. If my lunch is not "big enough" too bad for me I'm an adult JEEZ
Haha, In that case you could say, "No thanks, but if you really want to feed people, the soup kitchen is always looking for volunteers!"0 -
It drives me nuts that moderation doesn't end well for me and I have to keep explaining that. I've decided to tell people it's not an addiction or a satiety issue or carb cravings or some emotional compulsion or anything else. It's just that I enjoy quietly hating on all you people who can effortlessly have one piece of cake and then walk away satisfied. I am enjoying my bellyful of hatred, okay? So I'm going to be off in this corner with my steak, scowling at all the normal-weight people cruising the dessert bar for sensible portions to fit into their daily allotment. Because I like it!
I think you should probably talk to a therapist if people with normal eating habits bother you that much...0 -
It drives me nuts that moderation doesn't end well for me and I have to keep explaining that. I've decided to tell people it's not an addiction or a satiety issue or carb cravings or some emotional compulsion or anything else. It's just that I enjoy quietly hating on all you people who can effortlessly have one piece of cake and then walk away satisfied. I am enjoying my bellyful of hatred, okay? So I'm going to be off in this corner with my steak, scowling at all the normal-weight people cruising the dessert bar for sensible portions to fit into their daily allotment. Because I like it!
I think you should probably talk to a therapist if people with normal eating habits bother you that much...
If that is normal how come so many Americans are obese or overweight? By definition, that isn't normal!
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