Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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lilaclovebird wrote: »Original Poster who I will not identify for her sake, I'm glad I read it. I will reply with thoughts of my experience (and for those of you reading my experience is not at all the same, but something in what I'm saying may help her or someone else)
You have dealt with a lot. It does not matter what your orientation is in so far as what happened was in NO way, shape or form any fault of your own. At All. You are blameless. (HUGE HUGS). I am so sorry that you had the experiences you did.
**WARNING FOR THOSE WHO MIGHT BE TRIGGERED BY VIOLENCE - SKIP THE REST OF THIS POST PLEASE, THE LAST THING I WANT TO DO IS UPSET SOMEONE**
When I was 20 I met an acquaintance through a co-worker. He was a wealthy physician. He invited me to a barbecue. I was in no way attracted to him but I thought he was just being friendly and he was "known" so I said yes. I was drugged (the date rape drug) and have no recollection of what happened, but why would I be drugged if nothing happened?
The same year I was taken by two men in a situation where I thought there was a good chance I'd be killed and I was raped by one. I talked my way out of being raped by the second. I talked the first into a condom. I talked my way into being let go. I was shaken and I (kick myself for this one now) chalked it up to a hard learning experience and I moved on without reporting it and without telling anyone. Until 10 years later someone threatened by then 2 year old daughter. I took care of that situation IMMEDIATELY and have entirely put that person out of my life. I had flashbacks. I had nightmares. I sought counseling and was told I had PTSD. Counseling really helped me enormously. I reframed the incident so that I was strong and did everything I could to protect myself. I worked through the issues and I have not had issues since and that has been a number of years ago. Please seek counseling. Call the hotline number that you see for victims of ___ crimes even if you feel it does not apply to you because they can put you in touch with counselors. HUGE HUGE HUGS.
The first few counselors I saw were batty, find one you can work with. What happened does not define me nor do I think about it often. It is now just a tiny moment in time. You will get there. I believe in you and your bright future.
I couldn't skip it. I could not move forward in catching up without saying something about this.
I won't share all of my specific stories but the first time I was sexually assaulted was by my 14 year old half brother while he was baby sitting me. I was four years old, and my 12 year old half sister watched.
After that, I was sexually assaulted 3 more times in my life at varying ages by various people(the idea that only men can rape is bull smurf). Only once out of those three did I seek justice.
In those moments in court I contemplated suicide. I thought about the shame of the situation and I felt like everything that happened to put me in that room defined my whole life.
After I testified, my counselor said that the rape didn't define my life, but the moment in court DID. That moment was me taking control and holding someone accountable to their hurtful actions towards me. It took a long time before things balanced out and I was able to get out of my depression and let go of the thoughts of ending my life.
I've taken my life back and I have 30 pounds down to show for it. I'm strong, because I recognized my weakness and that I needed help.
Looking back, those situations are tiny blips in the radar of my past and do not compare to the amazing moments and real friends I have had since.
It seems difficult and you may feel alone, but help IS out there. All you have to do is find it.
And of course we're all here for you!
Omg so sorry you guys had to go through that.. I can only imagine what its like having to deal with that0 -
@annette_15, how's your husband doing?0
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Update on Princess Bride/Halloween. SO accidentally had the sword from his costume sent to the wrong address and decided since it was all foam it would be fine in his carry-on luggage:
Text from SO:
My sword caused a kerfuffle going through x-ray machine - I saw the display monitor - it looks SO REAL!
Me: Were you delayed? Did you explain about Princess Buttercup and true love?
SO: TSA were Not much for chit chatting. They were multi tasking with Asian man who was struggling with the concept of walking through at the same time - Dude almost took his pants off.
(This exchange made me laugh this morning.)
Edit to add: This is at one of the busiest airports in the country during morning rush hour. I am guessing fella with the pants issue might have been struggling with a language barrier.
This made me truly LOL! Especially the use of "kerfuffle" and the man trying to take his pants off!0 -
@bkhamill and @Just_Ceci - Wow! Amazing transformations!0
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kellienw335 wrote: »@bkhamill and @Just_Ceci - Wow! Amazing transformations!
YES!! Wow.0 -
rungirl1973 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »@bkhamill and @Just_Ceci - Wow! Amazing transformations!
YES!! Wow.
Aww, thanks everyone. I was about 265lbs in that first pic, 170 in the second.0 -
CountessKitteh wrote: »riderfangal wrote: »riderfangal wrote: »Coastalpath wrote: »WestCoastJo82 wrote: »riderfangal wrote: »At one of our local grocery stores they have a cow on the front of the milk display and the cow moos at you every time you walk by it. I hate that cow. I turned around the other day and said to it.
" I know right!! But I am working on it so back off!!
There were 2 elderly ladies standing they and I am sure they were ready to call someone to take me away!
Ha! That's awesome
@riderfangal I've been reading your username as riderangle since the beginning of the thread...until I've been replying to you
LOL the riders are my favourite football team. I am actually somewhat obsessed lol. Truth be told I wanted to name my son Ryder but my ex was having no part of that
I probably missed it in previous pages, but @riderfangal you had a date on Saturday, right? How did it go?
He was very nice but no spark. On the surface we should have meshed completely but nothing. I was thinking maybe its just me in my heart I am not sure I am ready or wiling to enter into any relationship. Still it was nice to enjoy some adult conversation.
It happens. But at least you got a nice evening out!
I dated a guy that, "on paper", should've been a perfect match for me, but there was no spark with him either. I've also wondered if it's me not being willing to be in a relationship, but I want a spark, darn it!
(psssst... I'm post-stalking you
)
In my experience, do not settle for anything less than "the spark". That's what will carry you through the rough patches, and keep you working out stuff when you'd really much rather throttle him.
I stayed in a relationship for much too long because he was the "good on paper" guy who should have been my match made in heaven. Nah. Now I'm with the guy who would seem to be the "least likely prospect" (until you realize we are actually two peas in a pod, beneath the demographics) and we've got all the spark.
My other half and I often joke that we'd never have been matched on a dating site. We had very different political and religious views, which makes us "incompatible" to the algorithms. Instead, we have lively debates and have both come to a middle ground that better suits the coupledom instead of each of us as individuals.
We're also both huge nerds and fight about which Star Trek is the best, so you know. Nothing's perfect.
I find that adorable!0 -
So, I failed at the grocery store...I'm way over goal already and haven't had dinner yet. Oh well, whatever.
But anyway, after I ordered our half pound of cheese at the deli, my son politely asked the woman working, "Can I get 3 pounds of kittens, please"??? OMG, everyone in line busted out laughing, including me! Where does he come up with this stuff?0 -
@just_ceci inspired me to post this. Me at my heaviest vs, earlier this month. I started my weight loss last August but was already about 20lbs down from that heaviest pic.
You look awesome. Well done!0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »@bkhamill and @Just_Ceci - Wow! Amazing transformations!
Agreed- great work ladies!!0 -
rungirl1973 wrote: »So with my son's birthday last weekend and really busy at work I am over 100 pages behind. I won't be able to catch up without calling into work a few days so I'm just gonna jump back in here if that's ok.
Speaking of races I just signed up for the Disney Princess Half weekend- doing the 10K. I'm nervous as the farthest I have ever ran is 5K.
Welcome back!! Yes please jump in and don't leave us completely!!
I'd totally do a Disney Princess themed run, I LOVE Disney Princesses! That's so neat!!
Not a Disney Princess run, but I'm planning the Dopey challenge at Disneyworld in 2017 with some online friends from weight watchers.
Welcome back!
What is the Dopey exactly? I've heard others talk about it. This will be my first official race with a medal. I'm pretty excited about it and I DONT get excited about running ever. I'll be dressing like Ariel because she's my favorite but there will be about 12 of us in total running so it should be extra awesome.0 -
kelly_c_77 wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »@berlynnwall don't feel left out! We all get behind sometimes but just jump back in we don't want to lose you! (Or anyone else for that matter!
)
Thanks
. I will jump in when I can!
Ha! Awesome!!
ETA: Love the new picture, @CountessKitteh !
Aw, thanks. Just me and my fuzzy-butted baby girl.
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kelly_c_77 wrote: »So, I failed at the grocery store...I'm way over goal already and haven't had dinner yet. Oh well, whatever.
But anyway, after I ordered our half pound of cheese at the deli, my son politely asked the woman working, "Can I get 3 pounds of kittens, please"??? OMG, everyone in line busted out laughing, including me! Where does he come up with this stuff?
That's awesome!0 -
@Just_Ceci and @bkhamill excellent work!! Very motivating!'0
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CountessKitteh wrote: »kelly_c_77 wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »@berlynnwall don't feel left out! We all get behind sometimes but just jump back in we don't want to lose you! (Or anyone else for that matter!)
Thanks. I will jump in when I can!
Ha! Awesome!!
ETA: Love the new picture, @CountessKitteh !
Aw, thanks. Just me and my fuzzy-butted baby girl.
Adorable!0 -
Confession: (mostly self-imposed) crazy busy work day today, so I've done more skimming than actual reading.
@pofoster21, I'll scope what kind of 5k races are coming up for the fall and see if there's something fun. I can't really train for long distance because I overdid it training for a half a while back and now have chronic tendonitis. Stupid knee.0 -
rungirl1973 wrote: »So with my son's birthday last weekend and really busy at work I am over 100 pages behind. I won't be able to catch up without calling into work a few days so I'm just gonna jump back in here if that's ok.
Speaking of races I just signed up for the Disney Princess Half weekend- doing the 10K. I'm nervous as the farthest I have ever ran is 5K.
Welcome back!! Yes please jump in and don't leave us completely!!
I'd totally do a Disney Princess themed run, I LOVE Disney Princesses! That's so neat!!
Not a Disney Princess run, but I'm planning the Dopey challenge at Disneyworld in 2017 with some online friends from weight watchers.
Welcome back!
What is the Dopey exactly? I've heard others talk about it. This will be my first official race with a medal. I'm pretty excited about it and I DONT get excited about running ever. I'll be dressing like Ariel because she's my favorite but there will be about 12 of us in total running so it should be extra awesome.
Oh, I am doing the Dopey too! I did Goofy last year! We can meet up in FL before the CMM!0
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