Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • Scorpiotwin
    Scorpiotwin Posts: 124 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.

  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    Talkradio wrote: »
    These last few days of being sad have been pretty revealing about my unhealthy relationship with food... I just want to eat until I don't feel anything but full. The lifelong habit of medicating with food is lurking around me. I didn't log the last couple of days, and I know I probably ate over maintenance, but I'm happy that I managed to avoid sitting on the couch and eating bags (plural...) of chips and cookies.

    Back on track today. Even if everything else is haywire, I am going to be kind to myself and not eat until I feel sick.

    This is something I am currently going through myself. My MIL is very ill and it looks like they may not be able to do anything for her. I am close to her as I lost my own mom when I was 26. So I am somewhat self medicating with food and trying to stop myself from doing that at the same time. I didn't log at all yesterday, but I am trying to do better today and deal with the emotions another.

    I am struggling with this myself over my horse. While that may not seem as sad and traumatic as a human this guy is the love of my life. I am just grateful I can spend some quality time with him in the last few weeks of his life. I am grazing him right now. But when I leave I will want to eat and drink to fill the sad places. Some days I resist. And some I don't then have that guilt and disgust with myself to deal with too. But I think we have to forgive ourselves and just keep moving forward. I do believe in the phrase that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

    Do not underestimate how hard it is to lose a fur baby (even if they do not have much actual fur!). Animals do not betray us or hurt us, they do not fight with us or do hateful things. There is almost never bad feelings associated with our animals, so the loss is just as hard, do not feel it is any less a loss!
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    Today I had some delicious Ben & Jerry's ice cream after stopping in a bookstore. I didn't find the book I was looking for (Ancillary Sword), so I ended up going home and placing an online order for three books. Can't wait to check em out!

    ALSO, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! All of my grades have come in, except for one I was never worried about, and I am officially graduating University!! Now I can hopefully get my butt in gear and focus more on this! So relieved.
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
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    I'm reading feverishly to try and get caught up since I will be in training all day tomorrow. Still have several pages to go.

    Confession: I pre logged my food for today but didn't stick to the plan and went over. I thought about not changing what I pre logged but I decided not to lie to myself. NSV?

  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
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    ohgeeque wrote: »
    spamarie wrote: »
    I'm nowhere near my goal weight, but I am officially in maintenance now. The eagle-eyed among you will know why (I posted about my motivation many pages back). I'm on cloud 9.

    Congratulations!

    That's awesome. Congratulations!

  • Susieq_1994
    Susieq_1994 Posts: 5,361 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

    I'm like this :) I need ALL my hot food to be tongue-scaldingly hot, and my cold food has to be tongue-numbingly cold. My husband sometimes tells me that I eat too fast, and I tell him that it's because my food HAS to be consumed at the optimum temperature! Lukewarm food coming from either direction just stinks. >:(
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
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    New job requires a drug test and physical before I can be scheduled to begin. I've been on hold for 2 hours to schedule this. I guess this is how they weed out people to see if they have the determination to work for them lol.

    I see what you did there. ;)

  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    Wow, I just read through these posts about horrible parents and I'm so sorry you all had to suffer through that. I thought I had problems within my own family (my father had horrible multiple sclerosis), but my parents never abused me. Parents should never treat their children that way, and again I am very sorry. :(
  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

    I'm like this :) I need ALL my hot food to be tongue-scaldingly hot, and my cold food has to be tongue-numbingly cold. My husband sometimes tells me that I eat too fast, and I tell him that it's because my food HAS to be consumed at the optimum temperature! Lukewarm food coming from either direction just stinks. >:(

    You sound like my son, he will literally microwave his food two or three times through the course of a meal.....
  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    Wow, I just read through these posts about horrible parents and I'm so sorry you all had to suffer through that. I thought I had problems within my own family (my father had horrible multiple sclerosis), but my parents never abused me. Parents should never treat their children that way, and again I am very sorry. :(

    Don't take this the wrong way, I am not a creep or anything lol, but every time you post and I see your profile photo I am taken back at how cute you are! You have this cute innocent look about you! Very beautiful!
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    Heehee, thanks, we tend to think that when listening to the complaints of our monogamous friends but all relationships take work, friends family, partners but we tend to take them all for granted :(

    Exactly! Which is why I'm sitting here thinking you may actually be a few steps ahead in being so conscious and deliberate about those aspects of your relationship, whereas the rest of us in more traditional partnerships just sit back and think it will all magically work out because "we're in luuuurve", at least when we're younger. (Coming from someone who got married at the age of 20, because I thought I knew it all)

    I got married at 20, to a 22 year old man and we immediately had a kid (4 weeks later, actually, lol). 3 more kids and nearly 15 years later, we still love each other, but the fact that we're still together is down to hard work and nothing but.

    I got married at 18 to my high school sweetheart. On June 4 this year we will celebrate our 33rd wedding anniversary. It does take work and a lot of being flexible with the desires of the other person (mostly my husband is a saint at this) Our marriage is not perfect but we love each other and our kids/grandkids and that is what matters most to both of us, so we keep working at it.

    I should confess that I am also bi and my husband knows I have to indulge in that side of my sexuality from time to time, so that probably makes it even harder for him (hence the saint comment).

    Congratulations on what is clearly a great relationship and for both of you knowing what works and how to keep it strong. So many people lie to each other about what they want, and in the end it never works out. I am always amazed at long term relationships, as I see so few of them that are still going strong and still in love. Its nice to know they are out there!

    I have been with my husband for 17 years and I still don't understand how people "fall out of love". He is the most amazing man I have ever met and makes me laugh every day. The best part of my day is when I get to go home from work and see him. We work in opposite directions and once in awhile, the timing works that we meet at the access road to our town...I still get butterflies when that happens!

    Adorable. My husband and I have been together 15 years next month and I can't imagine a life of any substance without him. That's not to say we don't fight, because we do, regularly, but it's never been anything we can't make it through. He's the most compassionate, selfless, hardworking person I've ever met and I'm honored to be his wife.

  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    Wow, I just read through these posts about horrible parents and I'm so sorry you all had to suffer through that. I thought I had problems within my own family (my father had horrible multiple sclerosis), but my parents never abused me. Parents should never treat their children that way, and again I am very sorry. :(

    Don't take this the wrong way, I am not a creep or anything lol, but every time you post and I see your profile photo I am taken back at how cute you are! You have this cute innocent look about you! Very beautiful!
    Take it the wrong way??? I'm blushing and smiling my face off over here! Thank you, that's so kind!!!

  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
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    ythannah wrote: »
    Yeah, that is a nasty illness. Way earlier in the thread we were talking about serial killers and I said I knew a girl that was attacked by the local one we had. It was a savage attack and she was in the hospital for weeks and weeks, and neither of her parents visited her even once, because they were both just drunk all the time.....to make matters worse, her mother was a nasty drunk and when she was finally able to go home, her mother would get drunk and yell nasty stuff at her about hoping she caught AIDS from the rape and stuff. It was pretty tragic.....
    That's horrible! But I can totally relate.

    Had something similar happen (to a much lesser degree!) when I was 16 and had to have emergency surgery... as in, saw the doctor at 4 PM and surgery booked for 11 PM that night... my parents brought me to the hospital, provided the insurance info, and left. They told the nurse to call and let them know how my surgery turned out. Their excuse was "We have to get up for work in the morning" but it was really all about not missing any drinking that evening.

    I was sexually assaulted by an older male coworker when I was 17 and didn't tell my parents, for fear of hearing negative and unsupportive comments.

    I can relate to that because my mother did that to me! I was about 13 and was vomiting all day and in a lot of pain. A friend had slept over the night before, and by morning when she was leaving I headed over to the ER. My mother checked me in, and then left. I spent hours and hours in an ER room, puking my brains out and passing out over and over. The surgeon said I needed my appendix out, but they could not find my parents to sign the surgery consent. This was the mid 80's so before cell phones etc. My friend that had slept over stopped in with her mom that evening because they had been calling the house and could not get anyone so they came to the ER to see if I was still there. I vaguely remember seeing them between passing out. My friend's mother lost her mind when she realized I was there alone and that they hospital could not find my parents. She actually went out and hunted them down on her own. They were out at a restaurant having dinner. My father had come home from work, and my mother did not even tell him I was at the hospital or anything. I remember the DR reaming her out, and her excuse was that she was diabetic and needed dinner. REALLY? Grab a sandwich, wtf. Not only that, but she was gone for hours and hours before that.

    Because they had to wait so long, my appendix burst while they were taking it out, I ended up in hospital for three weeks with a nasty infection and my scar is HUGE! My mother was a complete asshat. That is one of the lesser things she did to me......

    My daughter is 13 and I can't imagine leaving her anywhere alone, much less the freaking ER! I'm not a helicopter mom by any means, but I'm there when she needs me. I'm sorry your mom wasn't. And in case you're wondering, I did not have a positive female role model growing up. Maybe that's why I'm determined to be the world's okayest mom.

  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    I like Arby's Horsey sauce on their curly fries. :blush:

    When I was a kid I would go to Arby's and get a roast beef sandwich and load it up with horseradish sauce. LOVE IT.

    I always put the Arby's sauce and honey mustard on my roast beef. So delicious.

  • Oberon21
    Oberon21 Posts: 13,235 Member
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    MoHousdon wrote: »
    New job requires a drug test and physical before I can be scheduled to begin. I've been on hold for 2 hours to schedule this. I guess this is how they weed out people to see if they have the determination to work for them lol.

    I see what you did there. ;)

    That was funny.
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    redd_87 wrote: »
    First off, I absolutely love this thread! Sometimes I think the best support for ANYTHING is realizing you're not the only one. I've been reading all 4 million pages of this thread (while I should be doing homework) for the last 5 hours, not to mention the last few days since I found it so I figured I'd post too. I'm very awful at communication and "sharing my feelings" so this is the first time I've admitted most of these things to anyone but myself.

    -I support and am all for "everything in moderation" but can't do it myself to save my life! One bite of a trigger food and I can't stop. Instead, I refrain from eating them when they are around me (ie work) or buying them when I am shopping. Things that are not safe in my house: Peanut butter, Tagalongs, and cookie dough. I've switched over to PB2 cuz a) it's just not as good as real PB and b) it's much harder to mindlessly overeat. The other two I simply don't allow myself to have... out of sight, out of mind works very well for me and I am a very successful "healthy" eater because of this.

    -I always buy low/no fat/sugar things simply because they're lower in calories, not because I want to limit them.

    -I'm a volume eater so I bulk up on low calorie items (veggies are my go-to) in order to be able to eat more (hence the previous confession).

    -I'm constantly rethinking the amount of calories I'm supposed to eat. I usually put myself at 1200 calories then worry that I'm eating too little but at the same time paranoid that I'll gain if I eat above. (I'm currently working on 13-1400 cals per day, with the intent of sticking with it for at least 3 weeks to see what happens.)

    -I'm 115# and the epitome of skinny fat due to unhealthy weight loss ~5 years ago with no exercise. (Currently working on changing that, and so far seems to be working.)

    -I have a horrible body image and still think I'm fat most of the time (quite possibly due to being skinny fat).

    -I see heavier people and think they look thinner than me. Actually, I see most people as thinner than me.

    -I wish I didn't compare myself to other people and I am working on changing that.

    -I'm offended when people tell me I need to "fatten up", eat a cheeseburger, or that I'm too skinny. I also don't like it when I hear fat jokes or weight related shaming of any kind.

    -I get irritated when having to explain over and over again that this is a lifestyle, not a diet, and I will always count my calories, eat healthy, and workout because that is how I function best, and I am happy doing it. Not to mention, the battle is not done simply because you've reached your goal weight. ["But you're skinny; you don't need to do that anymore!"]

    -I feel guilty with my success this far because I am part of an obese family and the smallest in my family.

    Please note: with all the previously mentioned things, I am still a very optimistic and motivated person. I love the feeling of eating healthy (I'm a lover of all fruit and green veggies) and working out, and I love myself aside from my poor body image. I use the high feeling that I get from working out and eating healthy as a focus point so I can focus less on my poor self image, and it certainly helps me to have a higher self esteem in general :)

    Thanks for reading and thanks for this thread!





    Welcome. : )
    Please don't feel guilty over your success. Celebrate your awesomeness and own it. You did it and beat the odds! Whoohooo and way to go!
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
    edited May 2015
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    I love my foods with relish or honey mustard or maple syrup if it's meaty

    Tartar sauce sounds pretty interesting.

    I have never liked mayo or ranch or similar creamy based sauces, I do love the hot stuff, give me salsas and hot sauce and peppers. Wasabi is good but the hot from the chili peppers is my favorite. I can go through a bottle or more a week of the sauce. Salsas such as pico de gallo I can pretty much eat plain or on a lot of things beyond tacos or chips (baked potatoes, quinoa, etc.) The sauce I had today at the little taco house was hotter than I expected and bordered on too hot. I like flavorful not not burn your mouth off hot... but I have a reasonably high tolerance too. Now my mouth is watering and I'm thinking of going and chopping onions and tomatoes, cilantro, and so on. I also love avocado, plain or in a good (no dairy added) guacamole. mmmmmm

    Lunch was two tacos -- one chicken and one guacamole. I took half of the filling from each and switched it so that they were two chicken with guac tacos on homemade corn soft tortillas. Soooo good and $1.60 each taco. This taco house looked possibly sketchy - really is an old house --so I was not sure if I should try it. I'm pretty sensitive to cross contamination (gf 20 years) and I don't eat dairy. I looked it up on Yelp last fall and discovered it is well known and people plan their trips around this place. I've been going there since and I don't get sick.
  • sean9367
    sean9367 Posts: 1 Member
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    arditarose wrote: »
    sigh...When I found that I couldn't eat peanut butter in moderation, and had to get it out of my apartment ASAP, I not only threw it away-I drowned the jar in water first so I wouldn't be tempted...

    I can't believe I shared that.

    My boss has the same problem. I wish it was just peanut butter for me. I have to fight everything and with a whole family in my house it's not practical to get rid of everything that I struggle with.
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    Talkradio wrote: »
    These last few days of being sad have been pretty revealing about my unhealthy relationship with food... I just want to eat until I don't feel anything but full. The lifelong habit of medicating with food is lurking around me. I didn't log the last couple of days, and I know I probably ate over maintenance, but I'm happy that I managed to avoid sitting on the couch and eating bags (plural...) of chips and cookies.

    Back on track today. Even if everything else is haywire, I am going to be kind to myself and not eat until I feel sick.

    This is something I am currently going through myself. My MIL is very ill and it looks like they may not be able to do anything for her. I am close to her as I lost my own mom when I was 26. So I am somewhat self medicating with food and trying to stop myself from doing that at the same time. I didn't log at all yesterday, but I am trying to do better today and deal with the emotions another.

    I am struggling with this myself over my horse. While that may not seem as sad and traumatic as a human this guy is the love of my life. I am just grateful I can spend some quality time with him in the last few weeks of his life. I am grazing him right now. But when I leave I will want to eat and drink to fill the sad places. Some days I resist. And some I don't then have that guilt and disgust with myself to deal with too. But I think we have to forgive ourselves and just keep moving forward. I do believe in the phrase that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

    Thinking of you both. It is so hard to face losing someone important to you. Be kind to yourselves. Be patient with yourselves.