Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • Glinda1971
    Glinda1971 Posts: 2,328 Member
    Glinda1971 wrote: »
    ohgeeque wrote: »
    I really am having a bad few days. I got in the bath tonight and burst into tears. I don't normally cry, even when i should, so to just cry like that tells me things are very wrong. It seems to be an accumulation of things, not any one thing in particular, but i am feeling extremely low and a total failure at everything, including weight loss and exercise. I will be making an appointment with my GP in the morning, to discuss my medication dosages.

    I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling. My depression has recently taken a dive and become worse than it has been in years, so I know how bad you must be feeling. I'm struggling so hard against falling into the pit (so to speak), but I really don't know what to do. :( Your feelings describe mine as well, unfortunately--I've been feeling like a complete and utter waste of space lately who doesn't deserve to live. :-/ I hope you start feeling better soon!

    Susie, first, let me apologize if you feel I am being overly personal and intrusive.

    Have you considered that Depo may be contributing to your depression? When I first took it, my doctor asked if I had a history of depression, I said no because I didn't have a history of depression. Two months later I was sitting in my car contemplating suicide. The only think that stopped me was, that as an over-thinker, I couldn't figure out why I felt like that. Nothing in my life had changed for the worse; my feeling weren't based on my reality. I was simply, suddenly, suicidal.

    It may also cause spammy pimples.

    lol at the spammy pimples! ;) I don't think you're being intrusive or overly personal at all--if I wasn't familiar with the side effects of Depo, it would have been an important thing to consider and I would have been very grateful for someone to have brought it up.

    I have considered it before, but the fact of the matter is that I've been a depressive for years--in fact, my depression was reduced during my use of the Depo shot. I've been using it for a year and a half, and my depression has been relatively mild during this time, although I doubt the depo shot contributed to the reduction in my symptoms. I do know that it has a common side effect of depression and mood swings, but it hasn't really affected me much in that area, luckily.

    And I've always had spammy pimples during my period time, the depo actually reduced the occurrence of my break-outs to once every two months or so rather than every month like clockwork. ;)

    I sure do wish the solution to my depression could be that simple, though! :) My maternal side of the family actually has a long history of clinical depression and mental illness, and I'm just a casualty of genetics, I suppose. This recent increase in my depressive symptoms might just be environment-related, since I'm going through some stressful family issues right now and my husband became pretty sick a while back (that was majorly scary for me), along with the fact that I've gained a lot of weight during the last few months. :-/

    Also, I've messed up my circadian rhythm and I've been staying awake all night and sleeping during the day, which always affects my depression really badly (I need sunlight! ;)). I'm hoping that just getting everything back to normal will help me feel better. :)

    I do hope you feel better soon!!

    Thanks! Today seems to be a much better day, and things seem to be slowly improving. I had my "official one week in" weigh in this morning, and I'm down 2.3 kg since last Monday, which is very encouraging. I know it's mostly water and waste, but it tells me that I DIDN'T put on a full five kilos (I have about 2.8 kilos left to lose until I'm back down to where I was after my vacation, five kilos up from my lowest. Ugh.) in two weeks of not logging, which makes me feel a little better about myself. :)

    That's great. :smiley:
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
    spamarie wrote: »
    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    I confess that I about died Monday when I saw that Faith No More had just booked a show at Red Rocks in September...Got my tickets on Wednesday - 25th row! (sold out this morning.)

    My favorite band in the entire universe. THE. ENTIRE. UNIVERSE.

    I was so sad when they called it quits in '98 & thought they'd always just be music that I would throw on & wax nostalgic for the hard-partying 90s. When they did get together and perform in later years, it was always overseas.

    Now it's 2015, they've got a new album out (solid B+ as far as reunions go) and they're playing at M************ RED ROCKS. 5 minutes from my house. If you couldn't tell, I am FAR BEYOND STOKED.

    Nice! I had the sadz yesterday, because Rob Zombie was playing 30 minutes from my house and 1) I had no one to go with, hubs doesn't do that kind of music, and 2) couldn't afford to buy tickets. It was Rob *kitten* Zombie, dammit! :rage:

    That is rubbish! I'd have gone with you but I think I'm on the wrong continent.

    I lovelovelove Rob Zombie. Have all his movies, all the CDs of his and White Zombie lol... I'm a nut.
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
    My confession today is that I spent all weekend kind of in a funk because the scale went up 2 lbs. I forced myself to have a good weekend with the boys (went to the zoo/dino exhibit, downtown street market/fair, walked around downtown, rode the train, was outside tons) and then this morning the frickin scale was still up :(

    Except this morning I put on a pair of khakis that wouldn’t even close a month ago and they fit fine. Another maybe 3-5 lbs will make them loose enough for work (I wear loose clothes at work, tighter clothes at home). That makes me happy and also reinforces that the stupid scale is a lying liar that lies. I’m disappointed that I bought into the scale number and let it put me in a funk (albeit mostly internal, I acted happy for the boys). I’m a work in progress, I guess…
  • misskarne
    misskarne Posts: 1,765 Member
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    I'm 29 and I <3 Frozen. I have no shame.

    I'm 26 and I have never seen Frozen. Or Dirty Dancing. Or Grease. Or a lot of other chick flicks. Maybe that explains my post about not knowing how to do girly things. I still have no intention of watching any of these films though.

    I didn't like Grease much but I love Dirty Dancing!

    Footloose!
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
    nonoelmo wrote: »

    Edit - no meaning to my tattoo - but it is the result of four artists over a span of 20 years - and looks like one piece. It makes me happy when I see it and I like the way it looks. While I love quality tattoo work on people (and like seeing it) I like that mine does not show in my professional life (although it really would not matter where I work.):smile:

    I have 11 tats and they're all covered by work clothes (although my ankle ones are stretching it, it only covers if I wear pants, which I do). I'm very careful to always be professional looking at work.
  • kelly_c_77
    kelly_c_77 Posts: 5,658 Member
    misskarne wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    I'm 29 and I <3 Frozen. I have no shame.

    I'm 26 and I have never seen Frozen. Or Dirty Dancing. Or Grease. Or a lot of other chick flicks. Maybe that explains my post about not knowing how to do girly things. I still have no intention of watching any of these films though.

    I didn't like Grease much but I love Dirty Dancing!

    Footloose!

    One of my favorites, ever! The original one with Kevin Bacon, of course!
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
    kelly_c_77 wrote: »
    misskarne wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    I'm 29 and I <3 Frozen. I have no shame.

    I'm 26 and I have never seen Frozen. Or Dirty Dancing. Or Grease. Or a lot of other chick flicks. Maybe that explains my post about not knowing how to do girly things. I still have no intention of watching any of these films though.

    I didn't like Grease much but I love Dirty Dancing!

    Footloose!

    One of my favorites, ever! The original one with Kevin Bacon, of course!

    The remake was terrible :( Kevin Bacon all the way!
  • Lois_1989
    Lois_1989 Posts: 6,410 Member
    misskarne wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    I'm 29 and I <3 Frozen. I have no shame.

    I'm 26 and I have never seen Frozen. Or Dirty Dancing. Or Grease. Or a lot of other chick flicks. Maybe that explains my post about not knowing how to do girly things. I still have no intention of watching any of these films though.

    I didn't like Grease much but I love Dirty Dancing!

    Footloose!

    Haven't seen that either. I do like Bacon, but I don't do dance/singing. I only just tolerated Sweeny Todd, and that was only because it had Jonny Depp. :smile:
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,439 Member
    Just wanted to say HI from page 783. It's going to take me all day to catch up. That's what I get for not signing in all weekend.

    Luckily, the boss is on vacation and I don't have much to do today. See you all in 80 pages or so. LOL :p
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
    Oh, and what do the cool moms and kiddos do on Sunday morning? Matching Frozen color manicures of course! (Proud mommy moment, a few months ago just the idea of something touching her hands made her panic, now she loves having her nails painted! Small victories over Sensory Processing Disorder!)

    Sweet!
  • krissyreminisce
    krissyreminisce Posts: 284 Member
    I confess that I totally started playing Hay Day because of @Susieq_1994 lol. I'm addicted now!
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    Thank god it's summer! Just found out my gym is closed from tomorrow until June 29th for remodeling!! I know I can jog outside but I have always been a gym goer- this just makes me sad :'(

    Edited- spelling for the win again!

    Three weeks? That seems a little crazy. Do you still have to pay for June? Is it a small locally owned gym?
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,439 Member
    tigerThea wrote: »
    OMG! I finally made it to the end. I have spent a month trying to catch up in time and I've done it! I'm inordinately proud of this. First I promised myself I'd read 'em all before posting...I have rejoiced and cried and been angry and perplexed with everyone else. I have shared the pinecone diet, two spoons of hot chocolate and other items with random family members...while none of you know me yet I feel like part of the family already.
    Confession 1: for the past week or ten days I have not recorded my food because I did not want to lose my place in this thread.
    Confession 2: in the past I was all about the gym and loved it. Now I'm trying to master the food and hope to get off my lazy butt soon and join a gym again. I have many pounds to lose so I need to change in ways I can stick to for life.
    Confession 3: I'm unemployed by choice because of a bad work situation and a blessing in the form of my sister. More on this another time.
    Confession 4: I may have to rejoin the world now that I'm caught up.

    Oh...this may be attached to a post or thirty since my iPad kept deciding to reply before I was ready...sorry.

    I am currently way behind, but WELCOME, Thea!!!
  • TigerNY128
    TigerNY128 Posts: 763 Member


    Thanks! Today seems to be a much better day, and things seem to be slowly improving. I had my official "one week in" weigh-in this morning, and I'm down 2.3 kg since last Monday, which is very encouraging. I know it's mostly water and waste, but it tells me that I DIDN'T put on a full five kilos (I have about 2.8 kilos left to lose until I'm back down to where I was after my vacation, five kilos up from my lowest. Ugh.) in two weeks of not logging, which makes me feel a little better about myself. :)[/quote]

    Great news!

  • TigerNY128
    TigerNY128 Posts: 763 Member
    My confession today is that I spent all weekend kind of in a funk because the scale went up 2 lbs. I forced myself to have a good weekend with the boys (went to the zoo/dino exhibit, downtown street market/fair, walked around downtown, rode the train, was outside tons) and then this morning the frickin scale was still up :(

    Except this morning I put on a pair of khakis that wouldn’t even close a month ago and they fit fine. Another maybe 3-5 lbs will make them loose enough for work (I wear loose clothes at work, tighter clothes at home). That makes me happy and also reinforces that the stupid scale is a lying liar that lies. I’m disappointed that I bought into the scale number and let it put me in a funk (albeit mostly internal, I acted happy for the boys). I’m a work in progress, I guess…

    I'm the same way...I let the scale affect my moods. Even if I'm only up by like .2 pounds or something! I will say, as I'm almost at goal weight, I've learned to be a little easier on myself and not take it SO seriously.
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
    ...I totally own this page. You guys, I talk WAY too much. *hangs head in shame*

    Sounds like you only have that problem on this thread and not IRL! Seriously though, love it when you weigh in on posts!
  • LBuehrle8
    LBuehrle8 Posts: 4,044 Member
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    Thank god it's summer! Just found out my gym is closed from tomorrow until June 29th for remodeling!! I know I can jog outside but I have always been a gym goer- this just makes me sad :'(

    Edited- spelling for the win again!

    Three weeks? That seems a little crazy. Do you still have to pay for June? Is it a small locally owned gym?

    :( No of course I had to join LA Fitness so I'm sure they're won't be any kind of reimbursement, I really like their facilities but their hours suck and then they decide to close the location closest to me for three weeks. GRRRR.
  • Lois_1989
    Lois_1989 Posts: 6,410 Member
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    I'm 29 and I <3 Frozen. I have no shame.

    I'm 26 and I have never seen Frozen. Or Dirty Dancing. Or Grease. Or a lot of other chick flicks. Maybe that explains my post about not knowing how to do girly things. I still have no intention of watching any of these films though.

    Ahhh, no judgement but WHAT! Frozen is one thing I can understand but no Grease or Dirty Dancing!? Oh my goodness you're missing out, I love, love, love those movies! I can still perform every song from Grease if asked to do so haha :)

    And I despise the song from Dirty Dancing. 'Over-played' just doesn't cover it.
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
    I really am having a bad few days. I got in the bath tonight and burst into tears. I don't normally cry, even when i should, so to just cry like that tells me things are very wrong. It seems to be an accumulation of things, not any one thing in particular, but i am feeling extremely low and a total failure at everything, including weight loss and exercise. I will be making an appointment with my GP in the morning, to discuss my medication dosages.

    Sorry you are feeling so down. Let us know how the appointment goes!
  • Lois_1989
    Lois_1989 Posts: 6,410 Member
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    Thank god it's summer! Just found out my gym is closed from tomorrow until June 29th for remodeling!! I know I can jog outside but I have always been a gym goer- this just makes me sad :'(

    Edited- spelling for the win again!

    Three weeks? That seems a little crazy. Do you still have to pay for June? Is it a small locally owned gym?

    :( No of course I had to join LA Fitness so I'm sure they're won't be any kind of reimbursement, I really like their facilities but their hours suck and then they decide to close the location closest to me for three weeks. GRRRR.

    LA Fitness do reimburse! The one I used to go to, the sauna kettle caught fire and they had to re-do the whole swimming pool area, we had a choice of three other LA Fitness's to go to or if you wanted to stay and just not use the pool they gave us a discounted rate. Mind you it was a 6 month re-construction so I guess that is a bit different... and I'm in England. Call up and find out, it's worth a try.
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
    Oh, and what do the cool moms and kiddos do on Sunday morning? Matching Frozen color manicures of course! (Proud mommy moment, a few months ago just the idea of something touching her hands made her panic, now she loves having her nails painted! Small victories over Sensory Processing Disorder!)
    3r3ommj4l2xq.jpg

    Aww, how adorable!

    Whoo for the small victory:).

    My two year old niece is obsessed with Frozen! Her brother the one day asked if she was a boy or a girl & she said no to both & he asked what she was. Her answer...Elsa hahaha.

    Haha! That sounds like my daughter too! All Frozen, all the time. If it's not playing on some DVD player in my house on loop, she's still running around singing "Let it Go" and proclaiming herself to be Elsa. I've tried to use that to my advantage with the potty training endeavors, but still no luck...

    Potty training at our house too! Does your little one go to daycare or are you a SAHM? Ours goes to daycare and she did pretty well this weekend. Only one accident yesterday, but we put a diaper on when she sleeps.
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,723 Member
    nonoelmo wrote: »
    @MoHousdon I'm enjoying reading about your swimsuit adventures. I'm amazed at your step daughter....(shaking head). I'm still far behind so maybe you've heard from her since June 5.

    @nonoelmo I'm enjoying taking the swimsuit adventures. As far as my stepdaughter is concerned, I'm shocked she's being so inconsiderate and disrespectful. More on this later. G

    Glad you had a safe and enjoyable trip.

  • crosbylee
    crosbylee Posts: 3,455 Member
    After spending my weekend working a cookoff, attending the funeral of a dear friend and reconnecting with other friends (the reason we got to see each other sucked, but we were very happy to be together again), I managed to gain about 2 pounds. I am sure most of it will come off soon. It takes a bit to recover from an alcohol fueled weekend. Started drinking water like there was no tomorrow.
  • LBuehrle8
    LBuehrle8 Posts: 4,044 Member
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    Thank god it's summer! Just found out my gym is closed from tomorrow until June 29th for remodeling!! I know I can jog outside but I have always been a gym goer- this just makes me sad :'(

    Edited- spelling for the win again!

    Three weeks? That seems a little crazy. Do you still have to pay for June? Is it a small locally owned gym?

    :( No of course I had to join LA Fitness so I'm sure they're won't be any kind of reimbursement, I really like their facilities but their hours suck and then they decide to close the location closest to me for three weeks. GRRRR.

    LA Fitness do reimburse! The one I used to go to, the sauna kettle caught fire and they had to re-do the whole swimming pool area, we had a choice of three other LA Fitness's to go to or if you wanted to stay and just not use the pool they gave us a discounted rate. Mind you it was a 6 month re-construction so I guess that is a bit different... and I'm in England. Call up and find out, it's worth a try.

    That's encouraging! True, never hurts to ask! Thanks!
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
    My confession today is that I spent all weekend kind of in a funk because the scale went up 2 lbs. I forced myself to have a good weekend with the boys (went to the zoo/dino exhibit, downtown street market/fair, walked around downtown, rode the train, was outside tons) and then this morning the frickin scale was still up :(

    Except this morning I put on a pair of khakis that wouldn’t even close a month ago and they fit fine. Another maybe 3-5 lbs will make them loose enough for work (I wear loose clothes at work, tighter clothes at home). That makes me happy and also reinforces that the stupid scale is a lying liar that lies. I’m disappointed that I bought into the scale number and let it put me in a funk (albeit mostly internal, I acted happy for the boys). I’m a work in progress, I guess…
    Nice!
  • Rabbit914
    Rabbit914 Posts: 246 Member
    OMG NKOTB was fantastic. Nelly and TLC opened for them and TLC was great. I had 2 friends fly and drive in to go with me and needless to say it was a weekend of lots of alcohol and bad but so good foods. I am so tired today and we went to the beach for like 4 hours yesterday (which I think contributes to how tired I am today) and I tried to stay under the umbrella the whole time, but somehow I walked away with a weird burn on my chest and on one arm- yeah ONE arm. So now I look all crazy.
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
    nonoelmo wrote: »
    I am back at home, safe and sound. I also seem to have lost a pound on this trip -- we'll see if that was real or not. It was 24 hours of driving in two days to my parents ranch and one day there then 24 hours of driving in two days back home. I *think* it was cheaper than flying - but who knows. It gave each of my teens 24 hours in the car with me. (Ha!) It was good in ways that they don't quite get. My son did an awesome job of navigating on the way there. He's staying for the summer. My daughter seemed to decompress on the way back after her visit. I'm tired but all is well.

    Glad your back and had a good trip!
  • Lois_1989
    Lois_1989 Posts: 6,410 Member
    Hello everyone! I have a question for you all.
    What do you do when you are really angry/upset?
    I used to smoke, but now I'm not I just want to bury my face in something sweet. I actually don't know how else to make myself feel better right now. I'm stuck at my desk, so gym/run is not an option right now, although I would like it to be. Does anyone know breathing exercises or something like that?
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,723 Member
    Like I mentioned yesterday, my husband messaged my stepdaughter. She took several hours to respond and when she did, she said her great uncle passed away and that's why she hasn't been around for 2 WEEKS!!! I immediately said BS! She's not been a no show for 2 freakin' weeks because her great uncle passes away. She sure didn't miss any facebook posting because of it, nor did she even mention it.

    She told him she was planning on coming by today. I hope I am not home when she does because I'm not sure if I'll be able to hold my tongue. I just honestly, want her to take her crap and her stinky destructive cat and go. I wanted things to be different, I wanted her to WANT to be part of our family, but that's obviously not what she wants or she would have attempted to make some sort of small effort.

    I'm sad for my husband because he deserves to be shown love, appreciation, and respect by his daughter. I'm also sad for my daughter because she wanted to get to know her big sister and form a relationship with her. I'm sad for me too, but right now, I'm mostly just pissed off.
  • LBuehrle8
    LBuehrle8 Posts: 4,044 Member
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    Hello everyone! I have a question for you all.
    What do you do when you are really angry/upset?
    I used to smoke, but now I'm not I just want to bury my face in something sweet. I actually don't know how else to make myself feel better right now. I'm stuck at my desk, so gym/run is not an option right now, although I would like it to be. Does anyone know breathing exercises or something like that?

    It's tough that's for sure, I'm an ex-smoker so I know the feeling :/ When I'm stuck at work feeling that way I just get up and walk around the office since I refuse to smoke, eat just to eat, and I can't get to the gym. I think of Taylor Swift and Shake It Off in my head and that's quite literally what I try and do! :) Hope this is somewhat helpful.