What nobody tells you about losing weight
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seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
You have lost over a 100 lbs so you have been successful, but there is a better way.dramaqueen45 wrote: »This is not my experience- and not most people's on here. Maybe you are too low on calories? I am not feeling deprived at all.
+1
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seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
Oh dear. As Nuke_64 has written, you've successfully lost so much weight, so that's good, but perhaps it is time to reevaluate your strategy? I'm mostly an introvert, and I've never been the biggest social butterfly, and I very rarely eat out, but my weightloss has not negatively impacted my social life in any way. If going out to eat is the issue for a decreased social life, remember that many places have nutrition facts online, and for those that don't, you can use what you've learned in calorie counting to make a reasonably close estimate. Also, you do *not* have to eat everything. If you only have, say, 100 calories left in your budget, eat 100 calories worth of what's served and take the rest home. Here's a very short and handy podcast that gives all the tips and tricks to staying fit while having a social life: http://podbay.fm/show/911042029/e/1449133200?autostart=1
Visit the Recipes and Food and Nutrition discussions here and use Google to find ways to make your food taste better.
Many people here on MFP experiment with their macros until they find a protein, carb, fat, and/or fiber goal that keeps them full. If all else fails, find some activity or hobby that'll keep your mind off of hunger.
Best wishes on your journey!12 -
MimiOfTheLusciousLawn wrote: »beautifulwarrior18 wrote: »mstiffluvspink wrote: »The fact that eating all this wonderful healthy food gives you GAS! All I do is FART and it smells HORRIBLE!....Cmon I cant be the only one LOL
Actually I have no gas when I eat healthy. Opposite for when I eat like crap.
Best side effect ever, no gas!
Sadly, in trying to eat the fiber I'm supposed to (25 grams), I have found it causes lots of gas. So I bought a thing of generic Beano and take that whenever I eat something significantly high in fiber. Cuts it down. Doesn't eliminate the farting but less of it.0 -
benevempress wrote: »Nobody told me that it would be so hard to accept my new, used body.
When I was fat, there was that one thing that I didn't like about my body. I could tell myself that if I lost weight, I could be pretty and sexy and like how I look. How I looked naked vs dressed was consistent... fat.
I somehow thought if I got back to the weight I was 30 years ago at age 18, I would magically get back my teenage body, and now I would appreciate it! I've lost almost 70 pounds and I didn't get that body back. Instead of looking younger, smooth, and toned I look older, wrinkled, and uneven. Now instead of having one thing I don't like, I have many things I don't like about my body (loose skin, small saddlebags remaining, droopy breasts, bony shoulders and ribs). I look pretty good dressed, but naked is depressing.
I feel sad because I didn't get what I thought I would get when I lost weight, and because I don't have that "promise" anymore that if only I'd lose weight, I'd look and feel good.
I'm fortunate in that I didn't have that much weight to lose. To date I've lost 33 pounds. So I do have a skinnier body nearly like I was as a teen. (I'm 44.) But this makes me think about my husband. He's technically obese. Presently, he's not working to lose weight. But if he did, he'd have a lot to lose, enough that he would probably have loose skin. Does it shrink back over time? If you lose weight more gradually does it shrink with the fat?1 -
beautifulwarrior18 wrote: »
Yes, it's up and running and free. So I quit paying $60/month for parking and tolerate the sore behind as I commute to and from work on the streetcar.
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seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
This hasn't been true for me. Well, the social life thing is no different. Didn't have much of one before, don't have much of one now. But I'm not hungry all the time and I do eat yummy stuff. I don't deprive myself of anything. I just change how much or how I eat it.
I have Rich Chocolate Boost shakes for lunch. 240 calories, 3 grams of fiber and other vitamins and minerals. I have cold cereal (sugary stuff, yeah) for breakfast. I have today a Ghirardelli Chocolate Peanut Butter cookie for a snack. 150 calories, I think and 5 grams of Fiber. I have Fiber Now granola bar. Tasty. Really! Tastes like a chewy chocolate granola bar. 10 grams of fiber, 140 calories. I eat whatever my husband has cooked for dinner (and he's not dieting) and then try to figure out how to log it. If I have room, I might have dessert. We've got leftover birthday cake, or I have some chocolate pops from Aldi in the freezer. Just 60 calories a pop.
I keep Reese's Pieces in the car. I generally eat 10-15 on my morning commute and 10-15 on my evening commute. 5 pieces is just 19 calories.
All that and I'll still be right around 1500 calories. Very livable. I don't feel hungry all the time. I started at 147.4 pounds last April (2015) and weighed in today at 114.0.7 -
benevempress wrote: »Nobody told me that it would be so hard to accept my new, used body.
When I was fat, there was that one thing that I didn't like about my body. I could tell myself that if I lost weight, I could be pretty and sexy and like how I look. How I looked naked vs dressed was consistent... fat.
I somehow thought if I got back to the weight I was 30 years ago at age 18, I would magically get back my teenage body, and now I would appreciate it! I've lost almost 70 pounds and I didn't get that body back. Instead of looking younger, smooth, and toned I look older, wrinkled, and uneven. Now instead of having one thing I don't like, I have many things I don't like about my body (loose skin, small saddlebags remaining, droopy breasts, bony shoulders and ribs). I look pretty good dressed, but naked is depressing.
I feel sad because I didn't get what I thought I would get when I lost weight, and because I don't have that "promise" anymore that if only I'd lose weight, I'd look and feel good.
I feel the same way- I've lost 30 lbs so far- and frankly it was EASY (started on Jan 1 and was losing about 2 lbs per week). I could have kept going forever on 1200 calories (1200 cals is a LOT of food when you eat very clean). I wanted to reach my goal of total body perfection by the beginning of June (another 16 lbs) and could EASILY have done it. But then I started to see the beginning of loose skin, etc and got freaked. So now I have slowed it WAY WAY down and am going to focus more on starting a weight training program. I am terrified of getting the "haggard" look in my face. It was a huge disappointment that I could not reach my goal as quickly as I wanted to- and that I may not ever get the body that I want. But I'm going to do the very best I can- and am still 100% committed.
Thanks for posting. It's good to see that someone else feels the same way.
To end on a positive note: I am 61 years old- feeling much better than I did before- am much more energetic and my chronic knee pain is all but vanished- and get copious compliments daily on how great I look.9 -
Has anyone else already mentioned arm pits being smaller??? Trying to shave these crazy things and they like cave in now, i gots skinny in my pits!!!! I didn't know they were fat, but i suppose they were too! LOL15
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seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
This hasn't been my experience. In fact, I'm eating much more now than I did when I was heavier (while still keeping my calories in check) and honest to God, I have never once felt a pang of hunger (I've lost 30 lbs since Jan 1). I hope you can find support to help you find foods that leave you satisfied and happy- and a circle of friends who support you in "real" life as well as virtual. I'd also say that "slow and steady wins the race". Perhaps you are cutting back too radically on your cals, and that's why you're hungry? You can still lose weight at a slow, steady pace- which not only is much more pleasant, but is something you can keep up for the long haul. You can do it! Best of success & health to you6 -
NewMEEE2016 wrote: »seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
This hasn't been my experience. In fact, I'm eating much more now than I did when I was heavier (while still keeping my calories in check) and honest to God, I have never once felt a pang of hunger (I've lost 30 lbs since Jan 1). I hope you can find support to help you find foods that leave you satisfied and happy- and a circle of friends who support you in "real" life as well as virtual. I'd also say that "slow and steady wins the race". Perhaps you are cutting back too radically on your cals, and that's why you're hungry? You can still lose weight at a slow, steady pace- which not only is much more pleasant, but is something you can keep up for the long haul. You can do it! Best of success & health to you
Completely agree! Slow and steady and if you eat the right foods in the right combinations yiu will not be hungry:)2 -
NewMEEE2016 wrote: »benevempress wrote: »Nobody told me that it would be so hard to accept my new, used body.
When I was fat, there was that one thing that I didn't like about my body. I could tell myself that if I lost weight, I could be pretty and sexy and like how I look. How I looked naked vs dressed was consistent... fat.
I somehow thought if I got back to the weight I was 30 years ago at age 18, I would magically get back my teenage body, and now I would appreciate it! I've lost almost 70 pounds and I didn't get that body back. Instead of looking younger, smooth, and toned I look older, wrinkled, and uneven. Now instead of having one thing I don't like, I have many things I don't like about my body (loose skin, small saddlebags remaining, droopy breasts, bony shoulders and ribs). I look pretty good dressed, but naked is depressing.
I feel sad because I didn't get what I thought I would get when I lost weight, and because I don't have that "promise" anymore that if only I'd lose weight, I'd look and feel good.
I feel the same way- I've lost 30 lbs so far- and frankly it was EASY (started on Jan 1 and was losing about 2 lbs per week). I could have kept going forever on 1200 calories (1200 cals is a LOT of food when you eat very clean). I wanted to reach my goal of total body perfection by the beginning of June (another 16 lbs) and could EASILY have done it. But then I started to see the beginning of loose skin, etc and got freaked. So now I have slowed it WAY WAY down and am going to focus more on starting a weight training program. I am terrified of getting the "haggard" look in my face. It was a huge disappointment that I could not reach my goal as quickly as I wanted to- and that I may not ever get the body that I want. But I'm going to do the very best I can- and am still 100% committed.
Thanks for posting. It's good to see that someone else feels the same way.
To end on a positive note: I am 61 years old- feeling much better than I did before- am much more energetic and my chronic knee pain is all but vanished- and get copious compliments daily on how great I look.
I worry about this too... I'm only down 41.6 lbs so far but have a long way to go. I worry that I'm going to have skin hanging everywhere
I have been focusing on cardio but several of my workouts are strength training as well as they are water aerobics. I have to constantly remind myself that losing the weight is much healthier than not having loose skin. Lol 6 -
The first thing I noticed was I needed smaller shoes. I told the sales lady I had lost 40 lbs. & she made some comment about water weight. ( water weight, 40 lbs. seriously!!!!). My rings no longer fit. I'm down 2 sizes. My workout clothes are all getting 2 big. Stairs no longer leave me breathless. I have so much more energy. Some friends are so encouraging ( one told me I have beautiful legs17
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One thing I look forward to after lose the weight is being able to elegantly cross my legs instead of doing the best I can.12
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-That guiltiness you feel when you eat some'n you shouldn't, even when you can.
-Not getting used to your actual look in the mirror, to the point where you actually feel ugly, when you're not.
-Being hit on, and looking aside thinking it was addressed to someone else.
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seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
What the hell kind of diet are you on? I eat so much food now I can't finish it.19 -
That some areas are SO stubborn that you'll darn near have to become a rail to get the fat from those areas. That you have to continue to lose and lose and lose ...even though you are happy with Everything else (!!!) to lose One area.5
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RhondaDesiree120 wrote: »The first thing I noticed was I needed smaller shoes. I told the sales lady I had lost 40 lbs. & she made some comment about water weight. ( water weight, 40 lbs. seriously!!!!). My rings no longer fit. I'm down 2 sizes. My workout clothes are all getting 2 big. Stairs no longer leave me breathless. I have so much more energy. Some friends are so encouraging ( one told me I have beautiful legs
It makes me mad what the sales lady said. She totally discounted your hard work to drop 40 lbs. I'm glad you have encouraging friends, though. I really don't understand people who aren't happy for others' successes.10 -
GaleHawkins wrote: »fattothinmum wrote: »People suddenly begin to be annoying about your weight loss. As if we're not doing it right, or eating the right things, or doing the right medicine. Always tempted to tell them to worry about themselves and I'll worry about me...
I'm always surprised at the number of people who think they know how I'm doing it and how disappointed they are when the find out it is calorie counting. I had a lady the other day tell me that I had inspired her to give up wheat and sugar. I told her that I hadn't given up wheat or sugar and had no intention to. She looked surprised and kind of disappointed and said it must all the walking. I said the walking helps, but mostly it is because I count calories. She seemed so sad. I'll never understand how someone can think that giving up wheat and sugar is easier than counting calories.
I am not sure giving up wheat and sugar is 'easier' because the first two weeks were very hellish in my case. There is nothing wrong with counting calories.
I don't think that giving up wheat and sugar is easy at all which is why I would never do it unless I had a medical reason to do so. I think that with the internet counting calories is very easy now. It surprises me that a lot of people do not want to count calories but will go on restrictive diets.12 -
seekingdaintiness wrote: »The misery and loneliness you feel because you have no more social life.
The constant, grinding hunger because to actually lose weight and keep it off long term means never being able to eat anything that tastes good or anything in a quantity that will leave you satisfied ever again.
This post make me so sad. This is not my experience at all. My social life hasn't changed much if any. I never feel grinding hunger. Really the only times I feel hungry are when it is close to meal time and then I eat. I eat lots of things that taste good. The quantity is lower than what I used to eat, but I am able to eat enough to feel satisfied. We still eat out at least weekly, sometimes more. I feel better than I have in years. You must be on a really restrictive diet. The only think I restrict is calories.17 -
That some areas are SO stubborn that you'll darn near have to become a rail to get the fat from those areas. That you have to continue to lose and lose and lose ...even though you are happy with Everything else (!!!) to lose One area.
Omg, this is so true. I'm wondering if the fat will ever come off my calves and around my knees. I just want to wear shorts without being self-conscious! Meanwhile I now have all sorts of bones and muscles that I can see in my back, which is a look I would have never prioritized and don't care much for now.2
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