What nobody tells you about losing weight
Replies
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My face is so different. I mean, even different from the pic I have up for MFP. My eyes look bigger, my nose looks bigger, heck.. even my ears look bigger!! Not only do I not recognize my body at all, I don't recognize the person supposedly looking back at me in the mirror. Who is this person??10
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justanotherloser007 wrote: »My face is so different. I mean, even different from the pic I have up for MFP. My eyes look bigger, my nose looks bigger, heck.. even my ears look bigger!! Not only do I not recognize my body at all, I don't recognize the person supposedly looking back at me in the mirror. Who is this person??
I know I need makeup help with my “new” face, but abhor the idea of dealing with it. So I just keep going without. It’s been lovely. I don’t have to comb my hair because it’s so short, and no makeup. I can shower and be ready for virtually anything in five minutes.
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Yep, we need motivation and self-confidence.
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kenziestabes wrote: »That your cup size might go up instead of down/the same. Cup size is a ratio of bust to band size, so if you're like me and carried a lot of fat on your back, the band size might go down without the bust shrinking, calculating a larger cup size.
Edit: wrote waistband to describe an article of clothing that goes nowhere near the waist.
Started at a 40F. Am now at a 32J/K. In April I am meeting with a plastic surgeon to discuss breast reduction. Since they won't go down on their own, and I don't have a belly holding them up from underneath any more....13 -
Sand_TIger wrote: »I love Gloria Vanderbilt pants and jeans. For some reason they fit right and doesn't cross over my belly button like other brands. I'm short waist-ed (rib to hip is short) and I find having the button go over that area is very uncomfortable while sitting down.
Thank you for the tip on pants! When I start wearing them again I'll need that info. Because - nobody ever told me I was short waisted! The distance between my ribs and hips is like - two inches or something like that, but I never had the opportunity to find that out before because it was covered by fat.
I never understood it when my mother would adjust dress patterns for my waist. She had to adjust the pattern before cutting the material. Otherwise it wouldn't come out right. She made a lot of dresses for me as I grew up.
It wasn't until my OBGYN told me, "I'm glad you are not expecting twins." I answered, "What are you talking about?" She says, "You are very short waist-ed. Your body would have a difficult time finding room for the twins to grow." Not one of my pregnancies resulted in twins. I guess God found mercy in not blessing me with twins.
I have 19 more pounds to lose to get into my Normal BMI range. Unfortunately I still have a lot of fat to lose around my waist. I have very pronounced Love Handles. They really poke out on my sides over the top of my pants. Being short, short waist-ed, and fat sucks! Taller people can hide it so well.10 -
I'm short waisted and had three nine pound babies in my twenties. People wonder why I'm so sure I'll need an abdominoplasty.5
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Sand_TIger wrote: »I love Gloria Vanderbilt pants and jeans. For some reason they fit right and doesn't cross over my belly button like other brands. I'm short waist-ed (rib to hip is short) and I find having the button go over that area is very uncomfortable while sitting down.
Thank you for the tip on pants! When I start wearing them again I'll need that info. Because - nobody ever told me I was short waisted! The distance between my ribs and hips is like - two inches or something like that, but I never had the opportunity to find that out before because it was covered by fat.
I never understood it when my mother would adjust dress patterns for my waist. She had to adjust the pattern before cutting the material. Otherwise it wouldn't come out right. She made a lot of dresses for me as I grew up.
It wasn't until my OBGYN told me, "I'm glad you are not expecting twins." I answered, "What are you talking about?" She says, "You are very short waist-ed. Your body would have a difficult time finding room for the twins to grow." Not one of my pregnancies resulted in twins. I guess God found mercy in not blessing me with twins.
I have 19 more pounds to lose to get into my Normal BMI range. Unfortunately I still have a lot of fat to lose around my waist. I have very pronounced Love Handles. They really poke out on my sides over the top of my pants. Being short, short waist-ed, and fat sucks! Taller people can hide it so well.2 -
I have 19 more pounds to lose to get into my Normal BMI range. Unfortunately I still have a lot of fat to lose around my waist. I have very pronounced Love Handles. They really poke out on my sides over the top of my pants. Being short, short waist-ed, and fat sucks! Taller people can hide it so well.
Yeah, I have the love handle problem too and holy cow, my bellyflap really is pronounced. It's like all the fat left on my body is right there. I'm really glad I never had kids for a number of reasons but I would imagine carrying even one would be kind of difficult for me.
Things they never told me about weight loss - how much BELLY I'd still have at 155 pounds!
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Sand_TIger wrote: »
I have 19 more pounds to lose to get into my Normal BMI range. Unfortunately I still have a lot of fat to lose around my waist. I have very pronounced Love Handles. They really poke out on my sides over the top of my pants. Being short, short waist-ed, and fat sucks! Taller people can hide it so well.
Yeah, I have the love handle problem too and holy cow, my bellyflap really is pronounced. It's like all the fat left on my body is right there. I'm really glad I never had kids for a number of reasons but I would imagine carrying even one would be kind of difficult for me.
Things they never told me about weight loss - how much BELLY I'd still have at 155 pounds!
Maybe cut yourself some slack; maybe you're closer to normal than you realize!7 -
Yeah, I didn't realize that there would be sagging, bagging, and cellulite in process. I keep reminding myself that it's like renovations on a house. There's a stage where everything's torn up and looks awful, but you have to go through that to get to what you want.17
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Things they never told me about weight loss - how much BELLY I'd still have at 155 pounds!
Maybe cut yourself some slack; maybe you're closer to normal than you realize![/quote]
Well.... the truth is, "normal" is no longer healthy. The average person is overweight, after all. I don't demand to be slender but I'd like to not have a big gut sticking out, which I still do. Part of it is aesthetics but part of it is health, I don't like the chafing. :-)
I love that thread you linked to, though. It's been very helpful in the past.4 -
Sand_TIger wrote: »
The good news is, it’s super pliable and malleable.
Stuff that belly into something tight and supportive. You’ll be amazed.
I look like a million bucks til I pull down my britches and it kinda goes SPROING!!!!!18 -
Remember the old “snake in a can” gag? That’s my belly, unleashed.
Now there’s a visual for you.10 -
springlering62 wrote: »Remember the old “snake in a can” gag? That’s my belly, unleashed.
Now there’s a visual for you.
Now I'm laughing my head off. I love that! My belly still has enough fat in it that it can't be flattened, which is another reason why I still need to work on it. Which brings me to another "nobody ever told me this" kind of thing. At 5'3" and fine boned, I'm still more overweight than I thought I'd be at 155 pounds. I do carry some muscle but a lot of other women are much more proportional at this height and weight because they have some natural padding on thighs and chest. I don't carry much fat on my upper body, or my lower body either, it's all just sort of settled to the middle.7 -
Sand_TIger wrote: »springlering62 wrote: »Remember the old “snake in a can” gag? That’s my belly, unleashed.
Now there’s a visual for you.
Now I'm laughing my head off. I love that! My belly still has enough fat in it that it can't be flattened, which is another reason why I still need to work on it. Which brings me to another "nobody ever told me this" kind of thing. At 5'3" and fine boned, I'm still more overweight than I thought I'd be at 155 pounds. I do carry some muscle but a lot of other women are much more proportional at this height and weight because they have some natural padding on thighs and chest. I don't carry much fat on my upper body, or my lower body either, it's all just sort of settled to the middle.
This is kind of how I am. I expected to be 'reasonable' when I got into the normal BMI. No I just looked pot bellied and still really fat. I will say losing another 25lbs helped - but also have to say I still and will always have most of my body fat (and there will always be body fat) in my middle. I always did. Obese even my arms and legs were disproportionally thinner - then I lost weight first in... my arms and legs. It is what it is. It's not real noticeable anymore in clothes - at like a 20.something BMI.9 -
wunderkindking wrote: »Sand_TIger wrote: »springlering62 wrote: »Remember the old “snake in a can” gag? That’s my belly, unleashed.
Now there’s a visual for you.
Now I'm laughing my head off. I love that! My belly still has enough fat in it that it can't be flattened, which is another reason why I still need to work on it. Which brings me to another "nobody ever told me this" kind of thing. At 5'3" and fine boned, I'm still more overweight than I thought I'd be at 155 pounds. I do carry some muscle but a lot of other women are much more proportional at this height and weight because they have some natural padding on thighs and chest. I don't carry much fat on my upper body, or my lower body either, it's all just sort of settled to the middle.
This is kind of how I am. I expected to be 'reasonable' when I got into the normal BMI. No I just looked pot bellied and still really fat. I will say losing another 25lbs helped - but also have to say I still and will always have most of my body fat (and there will always be body fat) in my middle. I always did. Obese even my arms and legs were disproportionally thinner - then I lost weight first in... my arms and legs. It is what it is. It's not real noticeable anymore in clothes - at like a 20.something BMI.
Honestly, I don’t think it’s fat. I think it’s leftover spare skin. Skin does the pantyhose thing as we go (in mine and probably your case) from XXL to XS. You know. When they stretch out and bag and kind of do the accordion pleat thing. That’s my skin from underboob to top of pelvis, from side to side. (For some reason my back is pretty taut.)
I can easily pull belly skin out several inches when relaxed. But, I can also poke my belly with my fingers and it’s solid muscle underneath there.
One of my Pilates instructors was real big about having us “lobster claw” our lats and hips while doing side series, because we should “feel the action of the muscle we’re working on if we’re doing it right”, so I’ve fallen in the habit of doing so, and enjoying the muscle action. The sensation and appearance of loose skin isn’t there then.
Maybe what we’re perceiving as belly fat is like @AnnPT77’s batwing homily : loose skin until flexed and needed.
One interesting side note. I’ve been doing aquafit with husband for a couple weeks now, and swear it helping with the loose belly skin.
Either that or the chlorine is desiccating me so bad I’ll wind up looking like an old school dried apple doll.12 -
I’ve always felt like I wasn’t a tiny person. I mean in stature, sure, at 5’1 pretty tiny, but I’ve always felt a little round a squishy like a mom bod or grandma bod that’s round in the middle and soft to hug LOL. Laying in my bed, flat on my back I could see my narrow hips and ribs and thought, huh! maybe there is a tiny person in there after all:) 8lbs away from “normal” body weight so I suppose we’ll soon see. So interesting to picture a tiny body as someone who’s always been 30-50lbs overweight.12
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@TxTiffani same! I'm five foot nothin', but I've never been "small." At 15 I was 150, so 40+ lbs overweight. I've spent most of my life north of 200. Last time I lost I got to 199 before all heck broke loose in my life, and I backslid about 70 lbs, so I still hadn't reached tiny, but I was starting to see that tiny was in there.
I'm kind of terrified of it, TBH.13 -
@sargemarcori i feel like viewing myself as more vulnerable at a smaller weight has kept me from losing at some points. What do you find terrifying about it?1
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Balance...balance...balance. I had no idea it was my weight that was causing me to be so unsteady on my feet. It's amazing how much improvement there is.17
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@sargemarcori i feel like viewing myself as more vulnerable at a smaller weight has kept me from losing at some points. What do you find terrifying about it?
oof...there's some history there. I think it plays with what a lot of people have said, feeling like they are more noticed when they are smaller? And the old survival brain tells me that "visible is vulnerable." So someone compliments me, or i see a new low number on my scale, and my inner five year old wants to eat All The Things to go back the other way.
@coblujay same! I find myself doing balance exercises while I brush my teeth because I can.12 -
I've lost a lot of weight and gained some back - what people don't tell you is that, no matter how much you've lost, it is always possible to gain the weight back if you stop trying to make healthy choices. I've lost so much weight that people didn't recognize me. That I was like the 'freak of the week' at work because people couldn't believe how different I looked. I've felt jealousy from others and admiration from others. I was feeling so good about myself but my unhealthy relationship with food continued - and I've regained weight. I only have today with which to make healthy food and life decisions - and now honor my weight loss with a daily focus. I just don't take a "cheat meal", holiday "treat" or food excuse as rationale for derailing my focus.28
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How hot I’d be. I mean, I was pretty irresistible before because of my charming and sweet personality. But these days, I can’t seem to keep the ladies from falling all over themselves for me!
I think it’s the 🍑 😏
Is it, @MelG7777?8 -
PaperDoll_ wrote: »How hot I’d be. I mean, I was pretty irresistible before because of my charming and sweet personality. But these days, I can’t seem to keep the ladies from falling all over themselves for me!
I think it’s the 🍑 😏
Is it, @MelG7777?
Oh it’s the 🍑 amongst other things.🥵😏
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sargemarcori wrote: »And the old survival brain tells me that "visible is vulnerable"
What happened with me is when I got smaller, I got less noticeable! Yep, it does happen. (Not sure that I have seen others mention it as a possibility) I call it the ghost syndrome. As in when I was really large, I presented a large target. Now that I am smaller, much smaller target. So, maybe you can tell the old survival brain when it goes all "visible is vulnerable" that smaller is less visible. That way you won't have to fight it so much.
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springlering62 wrote: »Either that or the chlorine is desiccating me so bad I’ll wind up looking like an old school dried apple doll.
Hmm, it will be interesting to track this. How many years have you been small now? I think I have heard others say that it was a few years and they had some skin shrinkage. I have heard that sometimes, after a year the turkey neck is less pronounced. I have heard speculation that it is just that you get used to it..
IDK, I am just trying to ignore it and (except for my arms, which of all the things! Hated them before I lost weight and they are still horrible!! lols). Bottom line, there is nothing I can really do about it except live with it, enjoy the perks of losing weight - incredibly worth it - and consider it a reminder of what I am capable of: gaining large amounts of unhealthy weight that make me really suffer. If I remember that, and I keep it in mind, I am hoping to not gain the weight back. That has always been a goal, not just losing the weight, but keeping it off.
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Just putting this out there in case it helps someone. No one told me that lowering my carbs (not even doing keto or low-carb, just sticking to set macros) would require me to be extra conscious about water-soluble fiber intake. "The Dietary Guidelines for Americans, 2020–2025 recommends that adults eat 22 to 34 grams of fiber." I see a lot of people talking about how weight loss helped their bathroom issues, for me, it was the opposite! Avocado and black beans are now my go to.10
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@justanotherloser007 I’ve been around goal since late 2020.
The loose skin still continues to lessen, although the pace now seems glacially slow.
There’s a definite pattern. I’ll go through several weeks of real floppy belly skin and cascading muffin top, and then it’ll look better for a few weeks, rinse and repeat. But each time it happens, there’s a wee bit less. I’m in an unusually floppy period at the moment. I’m wearing my tightest pants, and they are quite comfortable now, but there’s a couple of marked swags on my belly and some cascade at the waistline.
I caught a glimpse of myself doing dumbbells yesterday morning and started laughing. Everything looks like a much younger woman- up to the neck. It’s all wrinkles and crows feet from the neck up. It looked like Barbie’s head on Skipper’s body, if you know what I mean lol.
I do think the aquafit is helping tighten, though, plus there’s unexpected benefits.
I dropped a 45 pound weight on a finger yesterday morning and it was throbbing and turning rainbow colors all day. But after an aquafit class, it was markedly improved.10 -
PS turkey neck definitely decreases.
However, you then get sort of corded neck muscles that flex when your doing stuff.
It might help to use lotions and potions, but I can’t abide them, especially on my face.5 -
@justanotherloser007 - I can attest that the Turkey neck does get better. I had it so bad. Now there's only 1 visible fold when I smile wide - there used to be 7 or 8! It took at least a year and lots of retinol cream but even at 56, things did tighten up without surgery.
Same with the bat wings - only that took much less time and no expensive cream.
Still have wrinkly pockets on my cheeks where fat pads used to be, and don't get me started about the side boobs and deflated belly. But it's all so much better than it used to be. And a Turkey Neck is 100% better than a double or triple chin - or worse a no neck!15
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