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What nobody tells you about losing weight



  • AmyC2288AmyC2288 Member Posts: 386 Member Member Posts: 386 Member
    Well, today is 60 pounds gone. Having a hard time coping with “smaller me”. It kind of hit me today when my trainer just about forced my chin up to make me look at myself in the mirror. I can’t bear to see myself. I still feel fat, make the same old apologetic fat jokes, etc.

    I was very surprised in that instant. It was like seeing a stranger. I was the first time I had thought of myself as (dare I say it?) thin.

    I keep thinking, naw, “thin” was the 120 I weighed when I got married, and 161 just doesn’t “sound” thin, and these smalls I’m wearing are just the result of vanity sizing.

    As I sit here typing this, I still feel like same old same old “me”, as if nothing’s changed, right? It’s just all so confusing. When I first got on MFP, I read the posts and secretly thought Body Dismorphia was BS. It’s a thing, y’all. This whole weight thing, the beating myself up for being up or down, the refusing to look at myself in the mirror, to see or acknowledge the changes in my body, wanting to crawl under a rock when someone says something nice, it all makes my brain feel so disassociated with my body.

    Ummm wow. Literally could have written this myself word for word. Have lost 50 lbs and currently sitting at 161. Experiencing all the same things, thoughts, and feelings. Unfortunately, I have no suggestions to help- only to say that I know how you feel and you're not alone!

  • solieco1solieco1 Member, Premium Posts: 1,551 Member Member, Premium Posts: 1,551 Member
    Thing that makes me smile today - it's jean week at work right now and I haven't looked good in a pair of jeans in 18 years. I seriously can't stop checking out my butt in the mirror in the bathroom. It's crazy but it makes me happy! I even wore sexy underwear underneath it all today!

    I seriously love this NSV :)

    Me too!
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