Online dating. WTH!

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  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
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    I believe online dating is a great way to meet someone but here is my take: dating is not entertainment and should not be. If you are dating you are saying, in my book anyway: I am available for marriage. If not THEN SAY SO up front.

    Interesting. So, you think it's the case that the common understanding of even being on a mainstream dating site is "up for long-term relationship", unless otherwise specified? That shorter-term dating is an exception to the rule? I would have thought the opposite was true..

    (I have no idea, just curious.)

    No I think ALL dating is such. That's the point of dating in the first place but I think most will not admit it.
    no, that's YOUR point in dating. it's certainly not mine.
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
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    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    Yeah, but, manners?
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    Yeah, but, manners?

    Manners are for communists.
  • luckydays27
    luckydays27 Posts: 552 Member
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    My fiance found me on an online dating site. We have been together for 3 years and will be getting married in August. My observations of online dating are very similar to yours.

    Keys to success from my experience:
    1. Be honest with yourself about who you are and what you want in a partner. This means describing what you are looking for in a person (height limitations, weight ranges, activity level, distance from you etc). A person who does not fit in those criteria then they should tell you that up front.
    2. Post accurate pictures of yourself and when you find someone you like, as for accurate/current pics as well. If they are serious about dating, they wont mind.
    3. Be realistic about what is out there. If you are looking for a supermodel or famous actress, you will be disappointed every time. Those women don't need to be online to find dates.
    4. Talk to lots of women. you may find that even one who is overweight is a great lady and one that you could fall in love with.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?
    we are all entitled to preferences.
    if a guy were to say ''i'm most attracted to slim & athletic body types'' i wouldn't label him a douche.
    but the mark of a douche is the attitude that it's fine to be rude and insulting about it.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?
    we are all entitled to preferences.
    if a guy were to say ''i'm most attracted to slim & athletic body types'' i wouldn't label him a douche.
    but the mark of a douche is the attitude that it's fine to be rude and insulting about it.

    Are you calling me a douche?
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
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    Manners are for communists.

    no one's saying you have to have sex or even have a coffee with a woman you're not attracted to (or, that Marx said that was at all relevant to the program). set your preferences to whatever, emphasize what you DO want. no need to be insulting to the people you wouldn't be interested in.

    say height is for men what weight is to women. what could be said of a woman who said, "no midgets! shorties stay away!"(deliberately demonstrating an equivalently uncivilized attitude here - no offence meant to little people or shorter men) rather than "I prefer taller men"?
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
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    i think men and women see "actively seeking a relationship" differently to women it means i'm not looking for one night stand stands/ random FWB. to guys it means she has the wedding dress picked out and wants to go shopping for wedding cakes on date 1.

    i'm sure the weight thing is annoying, but it's just as annoying as men lying about their height, education, job. i can't tell you how many short 5'10 guys i've met, how many phD's never made it past bachelor's and how many IT guys who don't know *kitten* about computers I've run into :laugh: oh yeah both genders tend to lie about their ages too.

    for me this issue is less about needing someone who's 5'10, educated, between a certain age etc but more about why that person felt the need to lie about something so immediately verifiable. plus, if they're lying about something so easy to verify,ihow can i trust that they arent lying about being married, a hermaphrodite, a korean double agent, etc?

    if not dating fatties is an issue for you, then i would suggest paying attention to the photos. if she marks a few extra pounds and there arent any full body pics and the only pics are face and neck shots at weird angles then the odds of her being overweight are very high.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?
    we are all entitled to preferences.
    if a guy were to say ''i'm most attracted to slim & athletic body types'' i wouldn't label him a douche.
    but the mark of a douche is the attitude that it's fine to be rude and insulting about it.

    Are you calling me a douche?
    why, are you a douche?
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    because more than half the time the dudes that do that are fairly chunktastic themselves
  • Kellbellftw
    Kellbellftw Posts: 89 Member
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    My husband and I met online! It was through Myspace though, not a typical dating website hahaha We were only starting to see each other for fun and then next thing I know it's five years later and we're happily married!
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?
    we are all entitled to preferences.
    if a guy were to say ''i'm most attracted to slim & athletic body types'' i wouldn't label him a douche.
    but the mark of a douche is the attitude that it's fine to be rude and insulting about it.

    Are you calling me a douche?
    why, are you a douche?

    Sometimes.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    because more than half the time the dudes that do that are fairly chunktastic themselves

    What does that have to do with anything?
  • operation_cute
    operation_cute Posts: 588 Member
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    I met my boyfriend online, but through a game rather than a dating site, and I never said anything about my size, and he never asked, nor did he care :) We hit it off immediately and have been together for almost 4 years now <3 An interesting thought... maybe a lot of girls out there think that its about whats on the inside, you know like personality, and their heart... rather than physical appearance? Even when I was in shape, (before I had 4 kids) I always thought that was more important, and would expect the guy I'm with to feel the same way. Even in my "after kids body" I've attracted several types of men through my personality because I'm a very good person, who cares about people...

    edit: btw I would personally choose a "teddy bear" guy who's sweet, compasionate, and a great person, over the "I've got a rockin body type" who's full of himself, concieted, and shallow any day :) Same thing when I was in shape :)
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    because more than half the time the dudes that do that are fairly chunktastic themselves

    What does that have to do with anything?
    didn't your momma read you fairytales? frogs only get to kiss princesses if they're kind.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    because more than half the time the dudes that do that are fairly chunktastic themselves

    What does that have to do with anything?
    generally, because when guys have over inflated views of themselves bad things happen. history is rife with examples of that, and online dating is no exception.

    specifically in online dating it's an excuse for why not being able to find dates is more because of other people rather than with themselves.
  • SteveJWatson
    SteveJWatson Posts: 1,225 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    because more than half the time the dudes that do that are fairly chunktastic themselves

    What does that have to do with anything?
    didn't your momma read you fairytales? frogs only get to kiss princesses if they're kind.

    Only page three and it's gone all "inter-species" already. :noway:
  • SteveJWatson
    SteveJWatson Posts: 1,225 Member
    Options
    generally, because when guys have over inflated views of themselves bad things happen. history is rife with examples of that, and online dating is no exception.

    HItler found Eva Braun on match.com. Fact.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    Options
    Just write "no fatties" on your profile.
    i love it when people do that. it's as good as a flashing, neon, *kitten* alert.

    Why do you get auto-tagged as a *kitten* for it? Aren't we all entitled to our physical attractions?

    because more than half the time the dudes that do that are fairly chunktastic themselves

    What does that have to do with anything?
    didn't your momma read you fairytales? frogs only get to kiss princesses if they're kind.

    Don't quote fiction as fact.

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