"Asking if I've lost weight isn't a compliment"
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DeguelloTex wrote: »Boo fricking hoo.
"I like your new hairstyle." "Why did you remind me of my old, terrible one?!!?!?!"
What a way to go through life.
^this! People are too darn sensitive. How bout: if someone is so offended they asked the question, just stop and think "THEY ARE TRYING TO BE NICE"?! Stop being so defensive maybe? If someone asking them that question honestly upsets them, then they should maybe do something about it so they can learn to take a ******* compliment.
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ogmomma2012 wrote: »To get back on topic, maybe there is a line people cross? Maybe the person hasn't shared they are on a weightloss journey and isn't looking to input?
When you have lost 60lbs it's hard not to notice....and he didn't give me input.0 -
barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
It doesn't offend me lol. It's the point behind why we aren't allowed to say "merry Christmas" anymore...
That's all i'm saying on this subject. This really isn't the right thread to delve into this deeper...
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christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
I really don't see why people get so upset about people who say happy holidays instead of Merry Christmas. We live in a world where mass murder is part of the daily news, so I say if there's someone out there who wishes you any kind of goodness, you shut the eff up and take it.0 -
Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »WTF happened in here?
yeah, probably should stop derailing this thread. It shouldn't have turned into a Christmas/religion *kitten* fight. Apologies for that.
LOL I didn't even know who did it - I was just skimming through and was like, "Hmm, yep, fighting as usual but everyone has good points....Ok, Christmas? Wait....religion?"
Pretty funny, actually.
I actually mentioned it in my comment so my bad...*evil grin*0 -
FWIW, I grew up thinking Happy Holidays was just short hand for Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Given the two are so close together. There was nothing PC about it, no ulterior motive. Now I say whichever pops in my head.
You are correct. I once read it a book that "Happy Holidays" dated back centuries (couldn't find that in my quick and lazy search), but was popularized in the US following the 1941 film Holiday Inn: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happy_Holiday_(song) The scene the song "Happy Holiday" plays in is a NYE one.0 -
barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
My point is people are "offended" when I say Merry Christmas...0 -
barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
My point is people are "offended" when I say Merry Christmas...
I've never run into anyone who has been offended by Merry Christmas". But I'm sure if I started a debate on one of my friends' facebook walls I could find someone . . .0 -
We can so easily be offended these days. I would much rather have someone ask if I have lost weight, which I have, than not say anything. It would be nice if they told me I looked great, but people don't often think of how to say things as tactfully as they should.
I personally despise using the terms "sexy" and "hot", which magazines and TV seems to think we all want to be. I am married and have been for several decades and know I look good to my husband. I don't care to be sexy or hot to some other guy.
But if I do look great, say so. If you want to ask me if I lost weight, and since I have, I love saying, "Yes, I have" because then the person will probably say, "You look good," which is what I really want to hear.
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christinev297 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
It doesn't offend me lol. It's the point behind why we aren't allowed to say "merry Christmas" anymore...
That's all i'm saying on this subject. This really isn't the right thread to delve into this deeper...
Oh, was there a law passed? Do you get fined when you say it? Have you enlisted to fight the "War on Christmas?" LOL.. aren't allowed to say it.0 -
I know! After I quit smoking someone asked me if I'd quit smoking, so naturally I pushed them into a rack of dumbells!0
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ogmomma2012 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
It doesn't offend me lol. It's the point behind why we aren't allowed to say "merry Christmas" anymore...
That's all i'm saying on this subject. This really isn't the right thread to delve into this deeper...
Oh, was there a law passed? Do you get fined when you say it? Have you enlisted to fight the "War on Christmas?" LOL.. aren't allowed to say it.
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ogmomma2012 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
It doesn't offend me lol. It's the point behind why we aren't allowed to say "merry Christmas" anymore...
That's all i'm saying on this subject. This really isn't the right thread to delve into this deeper...
Oh, was there a law passed? Do you get fined when you say it? Have you enlisted to fight the "War on Christmas?" LOL.. aren't allowed to say it.
@ogmomma2012 could you please stop derailing this thread...Christine has already acknowledged that she wasn't going to be part of it so could you stop too. wow...*smh*0 -
ogmomma2012 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
It doesn't offend me lol. It's the point behind why we aren't allowed to say "merry Christmas" anymore...
That's all i'm saying on this subject. This really isn't the right thread to delve into this deeper...
Oh, was there a law passed? Do you get fined when you say it? Have you enlisted to fight the "War on Christmas?" LOL.. aren't allowed to say it.
@ogmomma2012 could you please stop derailing this thread...Christine has already acknowledged that she wasn't going to be part of it so could you stop too. wow...*smh*
Well wow-headshake to you too. I had moved on but it roped me in again. Plus, I'm bored, and angry. So deal. I'm too chill for this thread anyway.
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ogmomma2012 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
So wait, hearing "happy holidays" offends you? Talk about thin-skinned! "Happy Holidays" started as a way to cover both Christmas and New Year's. Not to be a culturally inclusive phrase (although I'm glad it's transformed into that).
Personally, I take my holiday greetings in whatever form they come in. Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, who caaaaaaaaaaaaares. I like Happy Holidays because it takes the guesswork out of it.
As for the article, she got into a facebook debate with her friend's friend? I hate it when people do that! No one wins and the friend in the middle often ends up feeling bad because both her friends are uncivilized.
It doesn't offend me lol. It's the point behind why we aren't allowed to say "merry Christmas" anymore...
That's all i'm saying on this subject. This really isn't the right thread to delve into this deeper...
Oh, was there a law passed? Do you get fined when you say it? Have you enlisted to fight the "War on Christmas?" LOL.. aren't allowed to say it.
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I have to say, every year around Christmas I see all these Facebook posts and stuff about how "I'll say Merry Christmas if I want!" and people getting upset at not being able to say it anymore...
... but I've never seen anyone get upset at anyone for saying Merry Christmas? I'd say I'm sheltered, but I'm very professionally and socially active around that time of year, so I think I have a pretty good sample size. It's like people get the idea of not being able to say it and pre-emptively offended.
ETA: Sorry to continue the derailement, I've nothing else to say on the Christmas thing.0 -
Life is just more pleasant in general if you assume good intentions until proven otherwise. Having lived with clinical depression since childhood, this was a skill I had to learn but it has made a world of difference.0
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She's just bitter because she's fat and hasn't done anything about it.-3
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Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »ogmomma2012 wrote: »ogmomma2012 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »My parents in-law don't celebrate Christmas, due to their "religion". I still send them a merry Christmas card every year
I refuse to let anyone take it away from me!!
What privilege you must have, to force your holiday on people who don't want it.
Do you openly/publicly celebrate the 4th of July or Thanksgiving ? Because there are a lot of indigenous Americans who find those pretty horrific and would rather not have them forced upon them.
It's the same reason why you don't hear someone wishing Happy Channukah.
https://youtu.be/qUCNAnp2QAI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSJCSR4MuhU 0 -
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lemurcat12 wrote: »Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »ogmomma2012 wrote: »ogmomma2012 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »My parents in-law don't celebrate Christmas, due to their "religion". I still send them a merry Christmas card every year
I refuse to let anyone take it away from me!!
What privilege you must have, to force your holiday on people who don't want it.
Do you openly/publicly celebrate the 4th of July or Thanksgiving ? Because there are a lot of indigenous Americans who find those pretty horrific and would rather not have them forced upon them.
It's the same reason why you don't hear someone wishing Happy Channukah.https://youtu.be/qUCNAnp2QAIhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSJCSR4MuhU
That is adorable.
Oh wait.....I'm super offended right now.
*rage quits*
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missomgitsica wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »
I think if people are offended by it then they need to get over themselves as they are the ones who are encouraging all this crap in our lives where no one can say anything to anybody for fear of "offending" someone...even Merry Christmas is scrutinized now...happy holidays my butt.
Grrrrrrrrr the "happy holidays" thing makes my hackles stand up! It's Christmas, and everyone should have a MERRY one
I really don't see why people get so upset about people who say happy holidays instead of Merry Christmas.
I just think the whole thing is comical. I don't care what holiday people wish me. If someone says Happy Mothers' Day because they assume I have kids and I don't, who cares. But I do tend to say Happy Holidays if I don't know if someone celebrates Christmas (or know they don't), because why not try to be as inclusive as possible?
Similarly, I generally appreciate the sentiment if someone says "you look great, you lost a lot of weight!" or the like AND I understand why lots of people wouldn't bring it up. If I decide to tell someone else she looks great I try to avoid some of the more foot in your mouth comments I've gotten ("how much did you lose" seems too personal, trying to get a third party to say someone looks fabulous in front of that person is awkward, asking if I had weight loss surgery was pretty funny), but I generally take comments in the spirit in which they are intended and don't feel compelled to deconstruct how by trying to be nice they are reinforcing sexist hegemonic, thin-privilege patriarchy, because really.0 -
For those bringing up HAES and taking issue with it:
1. HAES, at its simplest, is about choosing to eat better, exercise, and do things that are good for you regardless of what you weigh. The basic idea is that you can do things to take care of yourself even if weight loss seems impossible or undesirable for some reason; it says that your body deserves respect and that you are worth taking care of even if you can't seem to get to where the BMI chart states you should be. It says that your worth and dignity as a human being are not tied to your size. It says that you have a right to compassionate, competent medical care whether you choose to lose weight or not. What leads to less disease? 300 pounds and sedentary or 300 pounds and active? 250 pounds and maintaining that weight with donuts and cheeseburgers or 250 pounds and maintaining that weight with fresh fruits and veggies, whole grains, healthy fats, and lean proteins? It doesn't have to be all or nothing.
Maybe some people think of it differently, and I could see where that invites some criticism, but the basic concept and message is not hard to understand. Some people feel that their weight is an insurmountable obstacle and prescribing weight loss over and over to them isn't going to change that or do anything to help their physical and mental health where it is right then and there. Some people have lost and regained hundreds of pounds over and over. At a certain point, isn't it possible that it might be more beneficial for them to maintain a bigger body, eat healthier foods, and make activity a regular part of life instead of continuing to yo-yo? Chances are that better food choices and more activity will lead to at least some modest weight loss as a side effect. Is it better to lose 25 pounds permanently through a few small changes and still be obese or to feel like unless you can get into the normal weight category, there's no point in bothering with anything?
HAES says that there is still some hope and that you absolutely can do things that are good for your body and mental health (don't forget that health can be a bigger concept than just the physical idea) at any size. In a way, you could consider it harm reduction - like needle exchange programs or methadone clinics or lower risk tobacco products such as e-cigs or Swedish snus.
2. Other people being fat or choosing not to pursue physical fitness does not in any way take away from your accomplishments or fitness. I realize that is not what was stated, but I feel like it's important to point that out.0 -
This thread is going places.
Not necessarily good places, but definitely places.0 -
afatpersonwholikesfood wrote: »HAES, at its simplest, is about choosing to eat better, exercise, and do things that are good for you regardless of what you weigh.
That's the first time I've heard it described like that. The message I've always gotten is "I'm healthy even though I'm obese".
Interesting. What you said, I can agree with.
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Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »This thread is going places.
Not necessarily good places, but definitely places.
Detroit?
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Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »This thread is going places.
Not necessarily good places, but definitely places.
Detroit?
Australia
Where we say's it as we see's it 
:flowerforyou:
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christinev297 wrote: »Alyssa_Is_LosingIt wrote: »This thread is going places.
Not necessarily good places, but definitely places.
Detroit?
Australia Where we say's it as we see's it :flowerforyou:
Just so long as it takes a detour to that bar in Pricilla.... 0
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